World News

Steal a helicopter. Dress like ninjas.

The G4S facility outside Stockholm that was spectacularly robbed

Show you have a sense of humour by placing a bag outside the cops’ helicopter hanger with the word BOMB written on it. This will stop the police chasing you in the sky.

Scatter small sharp objects on the roads around the bank you’re targeting to slow down approaching police cars.

Latest 2 of 29 comments

View all comments
 
  • bubba says:

    11:47am | 19/09/10

    I hear the way they catch you is from the serial numbers of the money stolen that you will spend on things like lets say a car, a home some idiots even put that money in another bank for safe keeping and that is when they get caught, even if… Read more »

  • David says:

    09:50am | 09/09/10

    They might if there was a rogue aircraft involved though . . . it sometimes seems that a plane only has to go off course a few yards for someone somewhere to flip out. Read more »

 

Facebook Recommendations

Read all about it

Punch live

Up to the minute Twitter chatter

Daniel Piotrowski

Marketing ruins everything http://t.co/G1hwzat2

Anthony Sharwood

"We are the only animal that actively seeks out a zoo" Good line to start the day from @jasonthetin on reality TV http://t.co/gEZ4XOiB

Anthony Sharwood

@farrm51 I gave you a ridiculously Dr Seussy headline, Mal. Hope it kinda almost sorta represents the actual story http://t.co/uLOCrOtG

Paul Colgan

@GrogsGamut for the record I thought it was a shocker and the Irish follow up feeble.

Recent posts

The latest and greatest

The humourless hysteria of the holier-than-thou

The humourless hysteria of the holier-than-thou

In I Spit On Your Grave, a young woman is gang raped in a remote woodland. She is beaten and tortured…

Cash mobs aren’t so flash

Cash mobs aren’t so flash

For a moment in the mid-naughties, they were the coolest of all cool social media-fuelled meme-thingos.…

If we wanted reality, we’d turn off the television

If we wanted reality, we’d turn off the television

“Some day, far into the future, this here machine will become a powerful medium with the potential…

Nosebleed Section

choice ringside rantings

From: City vs country: What would you change your life for?

Dieter Moeckel says:

We made the tree change from Darwin to Wonbah more than 15 years ago. After fencing, a road, and couple of dams our money was gone. Super is enough to live comfortably. We have geese growing old and stringy the only one that made it to the pot committed Kamakazi by flying into a tree; the chooks are… [read more]

From: I’d rather have a piece of toast than listen to crap lyrics

Erick says:

Led Zeppelin are responsible for my all-time favourite mixed metaphor: "There you sit, sit and stare, like a book on a shelf rusting." (Misty Mountain Hop) I laugh every time I hear it. Hmmm, I believe I've decided what to play on the way to work today. [read more]

Gentle jabs to the ribs

No wuckin forries. These nuckin futs are tuckin fops

No wuckin forries. These nuckin futs are tuckin fops

Well, puck me with a fitchfork. The F-word is apparently an acceptable part of Australian speech. That’s… Read more

151 comments

Newsletter

Read all about it

Sign up to the free daily Punch newsletter