Stupid

There are varying viewpoints on Sergio Redegalli’s “Say no to burqas” mural, but only one way to look at his facial hair.

It’s unAustralian. There should be a law against this. Could the council make him get rid of it?

The headline is not a mistake. Escape goats exist - at least, they do in the comment threads of websites everywhere, including The Punch.*

The beauty of this term is that while being appallingly bad English usage in a narrow sense, it is a spectacular conceptual improvement on the very word it butchers. Who needs a scapegoat when you could have an escape goat?

I want an escape goat. Rather than resorting to blame any time there’s any sort of problem, just hop on this conveniently-positioned imaginary beast and ride off, leaving behind only the comical clatter of little hooves, and maybe a faint bleating sound. Baa.

Continue reading "Anonymous comments: why we all need an escape goat" »

When pastor Terry Jones called off his epically dumb plan to mark the anniversary of the September 11 attacks by burning a bunch of Korans, for a brief period it looked like western civilisation valued people with something between their ears. But then along comes Alex Stewart – an Australian, no less – to confirm democracies provide shelter for the hopelessly stupid.

It was on behalf of people with a brain everywhere that the US President went on television to plead against the pastor’s plan to burn holy books. He succeeded in stopping the Jones protest but then along comes Stewart on YouTube, ripping out pages from the Bible and the Koran and smoking them in a festival of smugness cloaked in a mantle of enlightenment.

Score one for the Taliban and the view that the West is intellectually bankrupt.

Continue reading "Life, liberty, and the pursuit of total stupidity" »

Catch the Tiger Woods press conference on Nine and/or Fox Sports today? That, ladies and gentlemen, was the most cringeworthy 30 minutes of television I’ve seen in a long, long time.

I’m heading down to cover the tourney for Alpha magazine on Thursday. Wish I’d been there today, though. There are at least 10 REALLY DUMB QUESTIONS I could’ve asked which would’ve OUT-DUMBED even the DUMBEST questions the DUMB Oz media put forward. So here they are. Add yours in the comments.

1. No, but do you really, really, really, really, really, really, really like being in Australia?

Continue reading "10 dumber questions I could have asked Tiger Woods" »

Invent a silly catchphrase. Take to ridiculous extremes. Publish on internet. Watch as it becomes a minor sensation.

This is doing the rounds today.

Maybe it’s just me, but I think it’s a bit meow meow meow.