In this week’s ICB, The Punch calls bullshit on Shadow Immigration Minister and regular Punch contributor Scott Morrison, for citing a thing called the Social Cohesion Index at yesterday’s National Press Club address to show that Australia is going down the gurgler under Labor.
There are any number of indicators which Morrison might’ve chosen to bolster that increasingly popular thesis. Yet he chose an obscure, little known indicator, and if you ask us, there’s a sneaky reason why he did it.
Morrison, in short, was dog whistling. In a speech littered with references to asylum seekers, the Member for Cook thundered “it is a real concern that social cohesion in Australia has declined by 8.6% since the Labor government was elected. His inference was clear: All those illegal immigrants are tearing us apart.
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I have a terrible drug and alcohol problem. For decades now, it has resulted in shame, lies and the devastation (or, at least, slight irritation) of my loved ones.
No, I don’t have an exciting, out-of-control addiction a la Christopher in The Sopranos or Nurse Jackie in Nurse Jackie.
My drug and alcohol issue is actually that I’ve never much liked taking them.
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Many years ago, when I was living in London, the fabulous Nigella Lawson and her then-husband John Diamond held a party to celebrate their 10 years as a couple. It was also a goodbye of sorts, because John had terminal throat cancer, which left him unable to speak and – most cruelly – unable to eat his wife’s delicious food.
Yet even without his voice, John was a gifted communicator and, that night – friends later told me – he used a pen and overhead projector to convey his feelings for his wife. “How proud I am of you and what you have become,” he scribbled, in front of family and friends. “The great thing about us is that we’ve made us who we are.”
For me, a girl in her late 20s, bruised by a failed marriage and calloused by career over-commitment, those words evoked a great longing: One day, I would have an enduring relationship to rejoice in.
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It has always baffled me why feminists desperately cling to the notion that keeping your maiden name after marriage is somehow an indication of how empowered you are as a woman.
How does choosing your father’s name over that of your husband make you any more independent? Either way you end up with a man’s name. At least you get to choose your husband.
Footy WAG and mum-to-be, Rebecca Judd (nee Twigley) is the latest high profile woman to be criticized for her decision to adopt her husband’s name. Feminists cannot understand why so many young, professional women prefer to legally change their name & give up their identity. I don’t pretend to speak for Mrs Judd but I can completely understand her decision and applaud her for embracing traditional values over the flawed feminist obsession with symbolism and semantics.
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Oh. No. Really. Won’t someone please mop the tears of unreserved mirth? Apparently, Women Love Shoes! And Men Just Don’t Know What To Do With a Vacuum Cleaner! Oh, hahaha, the difference between the sexes. They’re just so funny because they’re just so true.
Jokes about the location of the clitoris or the importance of the shed are every bit as progressive and useful as beta-video. Equally acquainted with the pleasures of both, I’ve never understood the merit of these gags.
Perhaps this is because I am a mannish girl. Or perhaps it is because jokes about the “Gender Wars” have their place. Viz. only on disgraced Austereo breakfast programs or in forwarded emails sent by my father-in-law.
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I’m an orphan. My mum committed suicide when I was seven and my dad had a heart-attack when I was 16.
Thankfully, I wasn’t living with either of them at the time. I was removed from my mother’s care at age five and my relationship with my father was estranged since before I could remember.
The very first night I spent in a foster home I was bullied.
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Ask an Australian if crime is getting worse, and most will say - wrongly - that it is. Crime in Victoria, state authorities reported proudly yesterday, is down 25 per cent over eight years.
Yet they also announced another 120 police would be put on Melbourne’s streets with new powers to search for weapons, because - at least in Victoria’s experience - crime is decreasing, but the violence isn’t.
The public perception that crime is on the rise is understandable when you hear the shock and disbelief ringing through the words of Brenda Lin, in messages to her murdered family at their memorial service in Sydney.
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IT’S so tempting to see misfortune as a money spinner. Slipped on a grape at the supermarket? Sue!
Stressed out by an overbearing boss? Claim! Hurt your neck in a car accident? Collect!
But here’s something to consider before you speed dial a lawyer – a compensation payout may make life worse.
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