I go to the footy for three reasons. Firstly, I hope to be witness to the perfect moment, that rare blend of the poetic and balletic, when the players channel the ball with an energy and directness which can only be borne of fury’s marriage with grace.
At Brisbane’s affectionately-named Gabba, on this particular night, Carlton managed several of these fizzing instances, mostly at the behest of one Christopher Judd, whilst the Lions’ players fell in their wake like flapping fish churned up by a fast-spinning propeller.
Secondly, I want to be lulled back to my youth, when I too tumbled across the sodden turf in search of that ever-elusive kick to position, handball to advantage, mark to goal.
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“They are among the foulest creatures that walk this earth. They infest the darkest, filthiest places, they glory in decay and despair, they drain peace, hope and happiness out of the air around them.”
No one is quite sure whether JK Rowling’s description of dementors was inspired by Collingwood fans but it would be safe to assume that at some point in her life, the Harry Potter author had the misfortune to spend time with the Magpie faithful - so chillingly accurate is her account of how their mere presence affect ordinary folk.
It would be wrong to characterise all Collingwood supporters as ill-bred, gutter dwelling oxygen thieves more likely to break into your car than make a meaningful contribution to society, but one can understand why that perception exists.
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It’s the wild day of the AFL calendar – Mad Monday – and there’s a BEN-DER alert on those party animals, the Tigers.
After Richmond farewelled Ben Cousins yesterday, the players will pump up the celebrations on Mad Monday.
It was a brave last AFL game for Cousins, who racked up 21 touches while playing with a bung hamstring.
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