A balding, middle-aged man said something dumb about breastfeeding on TV last week.
Furious mums turned out in the force outside Channel 7’s studios in Martin Place, juggling bubs on their chests. As is their right.
But while this was happening, there was another protest underway.
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It’s a little known fact that you don’t actually need to be a so-called dinosaur to attract the ire of Motherhood Inc. Breaching their strict codes is not a crime restricted to middle-aged men, with lactating young women regularly convicted too.
You occasionally rely upon formula? Bad mummy. Your baby sometimes uses a dummy? Bad mummy. Your children attend childcare just so that you can pursue your selfish desire to work? Bad, bad, bad mummy.
You joke about caesareans? That’s a double offence (one for being “too posh to push” and the second for refusing to feel violated and less of a “real” mother for doing so).
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Australian women should be able to breastfeed anywhere at anytime. Are we clear on that? Anywhere, anytime. And the Australian public should be overwhelmingly supportive and respect that right of nursing mothers.
But, and call me a dinosaur, that respect is a two-way street. Nursing mothers also need to be aware of the sensitivities of breastfeeding in public and return that respect by, when appropriate, being discreet and modest.
Whether they be generational, cultural or religious sensitivities, some people in the community are just not comfortable with uncovered breastfeeding. It’s a very emotional issue, and the Koch family certainly isn’t immune.
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Our whole lives, we straight men ogle boobs. This, if we’re honest, is our true life’s quest. Forget money or the corporate ladder or a shed stacked with power tools. All we really want is to eyeball as much cleavage as possible before we die.
Well, we do. Just ask the very evolved performer Tim Minchin. In his brilliant song “Confessions”, in which he praises women and feminism, the chorus goes:
“F—k I love boobs though, I just really love them|F—k I love boobs though, I just wanna rub them|They’re just so jooby, they make me feel groovy|I would rather watch boobs than a movie| Be doop be doo. I just really like boobs.
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This Puncher imagines he’ll be able to bring a plethora of skills to the club. Finance nerdery, a pleasant morning mood, hailing from a city that thumped the rest of the league…
It’s Tuesday. What’s on your minds?
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