David Beckham

Is David Beckham coming to Australia? Who cares? I don’t. His overly tattooed torso, has-been right foot and toothpick wife can come to Australia if they like, or not. I couldn’t give a stuff, and we shouldn’t either. But we do. We really, really do.

Personalities drive the public’s interest in a sport, especially when it’s a public not already familiar with that sport, but those personalities rarely have the same effect on the field as they do off it.

The result is sports reporting that focuses on the mediocre effects of a darling or bad boy, which disregards the superior play of a comparatively unknown, or a team effort. Since they haven’t married a starlet, kicked goals overseas, or been involved in a drug or sex scandal. (Insert cheap Bulldogs, Sharks, Premier League etc joke here).

Continue reading "At the Beckham call of the cult of personality" »

An ageing, British soccer player known for his curving penalty kicks and inability to string together a coherent sentence is said to be eyeing off a cushy unit at the Australian soccer retirement facility known as the A-League.

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“My wife Victoria, and our three children whose pretentious names I can’t actually recall right now, have been seeking a change for some time now,” the man may well have just told The Punch.

“We wanted a place where we can relax, sit back and pretty much do nuffin. When we heard there was a soccer league where Alessandro Del Piero gets paid $2 million a season and where clubs are still vying for the signature of Harry Kewell, we could hardly believe it.

Continue reading "Confused, mumbling man moves to retirement home" »

It seemed like any other international sporting event. Beers flowed, and barbeques sizzled, in the car park pre-match.

Kids mimicked their on-field heroes, with the names of superstars Messi and Henry on the back of their pint sized shirts. In all, 93,137 fans turned up at LA’s Rose Bowl overnight — the most-highly attended match in the United States since the 1994 World Cup.

No matter your colours, most supporters were frothing with anticipation to see one of the world’s biggest football franchises FC Barcelona, who had come to town for an exhibition clash against David Beckham and the LA Galaxy. But on this balmy night, we received proof positive that fans here are fair weather supporters.

Continue reading "For David Beckham, actions speak louder than boos" »