Cows
In a few months’ time, you will be confronted by a bunch of people will beg you to let a pair of cows onto a ship. But do not allow those wild-eyed bovine to set even one hoof on deck, lest they rend the supple flesh from your throat. That sounds crazy, but give me a moment to explain.
If ancient civilisations, reclusive internet jabberers and random online sex offenders are to be believed, 2012 marks the end of the world.
Some say an asteroid with a crudely-drawn smiley face will plunge into the Earth during the final chorus of Auld Lang Syne, while others believe apes will suddenly spear everyone to death on December 31. It doesn’t matter - it’s curtains either way.
Continue reading "Happy moo year, just watch out for those killer cows" »
Unless you have been hiding under a rock for some months, you will realise that people are starving in the Horn of Africa.

The UN Food and Agriculture Organisation considers 12 million people at risk in a region that includes Ethiopia (82m), Kenya (39m), Somalia (9m), Uganda (32m) and little Djibouti (1m). The figures in brackets are national populations and imply that 12 million is only only about 7 per cent of people in the region.
But you know the risk to each and every one of them is serious when Bob Geldof is wheeled out in a suit. Geldof, in a recent press conference, felt compelled to remind people that those at risk are intelligent, creative and resilient people who are suffering enormously.
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Geoff Russell says:
I gave the school garden example to be concrete. The Kenyan project has, according to the article linked above, touched 55,000 herders, so it isn’t insignificant. But it is precisely the scale of the Heifer projects that make them so damaging. Consider, if you will the situation in Australia during… Read more »
Clover Moo here, reporting once again from the shady corner of the paddock.

I know what you’re thinking in that oversized human brain of yours. Wait a minute, I sound like that godawful ANZ ad.
Anyway, I’m guessing you’re sick of the carbon tax, right? Well, me too. If I read one more word about it in the old newsprint down in the chook shed, I swear I’ll start squirting Yakult out my udders.
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Rosita says:
Roy, if you put this in government speak, it sonuds reasonable: All individuals are required to decrease their carbon dioxide emissions by 2%. Those who fail to do so will have technological assistance that decreases their emissions by 75%.That should work! Read more »
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Lynda of By The Seaside says:
Reality Check: all animals, since the beginning of time have disposed of their gases into the ether capacious. Now, there would have been more animals, larger animals back in those times so one would expect that the disposal would be greater. We now have a lesser number of animals so… Read more »
Clover Moo here, reporting from the shady corner of the paddock. It’s been tough times for us cows. Yep, a real cattle dog of a week.

As if this year hasn’t been distressing enough with the supermarkets flogging my precious milk for $1 a litre, along come these revelations of brutality at Indonesian slaughterhouses.
I’ve known about this for years, of course. The rumours have been on the bovine grapevine for ages. Now the rumours are confirmed. We are being slaughtered like…like… like animals!
Continue reading "Some weeks, it’s really hard to turn the udder cheek" »
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JP says:
It’s just a load of bulldust. How else do you describe the capacity of a cow to type? Bovine intervention? Read more »
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pete says:
All these ideas are great in theory, but when your working 12 hours day and keeping razor thin profit margins you don’t exactly have the time or the funds to hand rear 50 calves for a couple weeks. Oh, and calves are supplied with shade, limitless water & feed, and… Read more »
The recent revelation that new Climate Commissioner Tim Flannery has a contract with Meat and Livestock Australia shouldn’t be a surprise to anybody who read his 2008 Quarterly Essay Now or Never: A sustainable future for Australia.

But I think both the relationship and the essay demonstrate that Flannery is not the right person for the job.
Flannery’s advocacy in Now or Never of abundant meat as the answer to global food problems is like suggesting private jets to solve transportation problems.
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Mel says:
I find it scary that someone so deluded is our Climate Commissioner! The sums just don’t add up. Producing meat requires too many resources as it is and there’s also the undeniable cruelty that comes with the industry. People writing sarcastic and arrogant comments will be the first ones to… Read more »
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Helle says:
Can I come too, Amy and Geoff? Yes, it’s sad that we’re a minority. Reading these comments today has made me realise just what a minority it is. Scary. The most disturbing part is that many commenters seem to view compassion towards fellow animals as some kind of mental retardation… Read more »
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