A mother knows best. Except when she doesn’t.
Women are judged harshly on every aspect of childbirth and child raising, from vaginal versus caesarean birth to their chosen brand of organic terrycloth hat to the length of time spent breastfeeding.
In most cases, decisions are based on a combination of science, experience and personal preference, and the smug judgers should shut the hell up and worry about their own family.
When I gave birth to my second gorgeous son six weeks ago, the first question some asked when they heard our happy news was: “So are you going to try again for a girl?”
Umm, how about you give the epidural time to wear off and let me enjoy my beautiful, healthy baby boy before telling me that somehow my world is not complete because I have only produced babies featuring both an X and Y chromosome.
Admittedly I have only had two children of the same sex, not seven like Tumut couple Andrew and Jodi McMahon who appeared on 60 Minutes on Sunday night documenting their desperate bid for a baby girl.
Nothing on this earth would entice me to have a baby at home.
Call me old fashioned, but I’m all for the protective womb of expert physicians and latest technology in a crisp white hospital environment. The risks are simply too great; the act of childbirth too unpredictable; the potential loss too devastating to contemplate.
And tragically, in South Australia we’re hearing all too much about risk becoming reality.
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Ninety-four year old actress Zsa Zsa Gabor’s ninth husband, Prince Frederik von Anhalt, reportedly wants her to have a baby using his sperm, a donor egg and a surrogate mother. Yes, he does. He visited a Beverley Hills fertility clinic for sperm analysis and blood work.
There have been no reports of him also having his head read; however, Gabor’s daughter, 64-year-old Francesca Hilton (a product of Gabor’s second marriage to hotel magnate, Conrad Hilton) has denounced the story as the latest in a string of wild publicity stunts by her seventh step-father.
And while the Gabor-Anhalts gallivant around celebrity baby clinics (if gallivanting is possible when you are just shy of a century, with a partially-amputated leg), my friend – a single mum of two young children – has announced that she has successfully battled cancer at the age of 38. Facing her own mortality, she had to put in place a plan for the care of her children, which involved her parents and her sisters.
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Save us from former Party leaders – particularly if they’ve got a memoir to spruik.
Former Labor leader Mark Latham has been suffering from relevance deprivation syndrome for years now. I was one of those dopes who admired him when he bounced onto the political scene – thirsty for someone with a bit of personality, a break from the beige. He railed against the ‘new political correctness’; he was a boofhead with a penchant for biffo, but he was fun.
Now he’s really jumped the shark and joined the conga line of suckholes who studied Post-Politics PR 101. The main rule of PPPR101 is simple: Court confected outrage at every opportunity.
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Nicole Kidman has welcomed a new biological daughter via a ‘gestational carrier’, Princess Mary had her twins in a natural, four-hour birth and Miranda Kerr released a statement that she gave birth to her 9 lbs., 12 oz., baby in a long, arduous and difficult labour ‘naturally, without drugs or painkillers!!!’.
As a mum of three who has been through labour twice, I fully appreciate Miranda’s use of three exclamation marks to describe her drug-free birth.
Gosh, I give myself three for enduring it with drugs and scramble to find enough punctuation to describe the caesarean. One way you can’t sit down. The other way you can’t stand up.
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Here’s a sobering little fact; Gen X women face a fertility crisis greater than any generation before them.
After receiving terrible advice from scores of feminists as well as their baby boomer mums, many thought it wise to delay motherhood for the sake of their careers.
Unfortunately your biological clock doesn’t care about your career, what car you drive or what your investment portfolio looks like.
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