Birds

This is a New Holland Honeyeater and we’re guessing you’re not.

The bird is here for three reasons. 1. We needed an image on the Open Thread. 2. Puncher Ant Sharwood had one of these in the tree outside his rented beach shack over the holidays. 3. New Holland is an old historical name for Australia, and it’s almost Australia Day.

What would you rename Australia if you had the chance? Anything else got you all in a flap today?

Continue reading "Punch on: Open Thread 25/01/2012" »

Dear Magpies,

We don’t want your babies. I understand that you’re just trying to be a good parent, but seriously, you have to re-think this whole attack the humans thing because WE DON’T WANT YOUR BABIES.

Have you ever been inside a supermarket? If ever you bother to check out Coles or Woolworths or Aldi, you’ll see row after row of food. Some of it’s fresh. Some of it’s pre-packaged and ready to heat and eat. None of it has feathers on it. This is where most of us humans secure our sustenance and we really don’t need to supplement it with your chicks.

Continue reading "Magpies, would it kill you to stop trying to kill me?" »

You know the moment. The sun’s briefly eclipsed by a dark object. Then a shadow flits across the ground in front of you. A sinister warble, a pang of fear.

For those of us who are attacked by magpies on an almost annual basis around this time of year, the birds can seem like demonic creatures. Exercising outdoors can be tough enough on its own without a sharp-beaked hell-creature lusting to peck you relentlessly in the head.

We’re coming around to that time of year again. Queensland newspapers already have magpie maps running on their websites, an essential public service. In reading up on the avian species, though, The Punch was astonished to read there are people out there who actually like magpies.

Continue reading "Magpies. Just a flock of stressed out folks" »

A colleague of ours across the newsroom floor has a bit of a dilemma. Their cat caught a native bird a bit like this honeyeater here. That was bad enough, especially for the honeyeater, but things get worse.

Good citizen that he is, the colleague put a bell around the neck of his cat to end its hunting days. But now the bell tinkles all night and he can’t get any sleep.

This is a major problem with no obvious solution, apart from the ones we just know you’ll come up with. Any other major problems and/or solutions on your mind today?

With apologies to the venerable Hillary Clinton, whose plea to treat women with dignity has enjoyed a clear run atop this website for six hours, we now move to a lesser but no less impassioned issue.

The Australian White Ibis, better known as “Bic Macus Scabicus” or “that stupid ugly thing stealing my sandwich! Shoo! Shoo!” is a much-maligned species.

But does it deserve our derision? Does it warrant being chased across city parks by office workers with umbrellas? Or has it earned the right for a tiny slice of the affection we automatically bestow upon kookaburras, rosellas, ducklings and the Minogue sisters? That, friends, is today’s dilemma.

Continue reading "Friday Dilemma: pest or downtrodden beauty?" »

Is the end nigh?

After all, 100,000 fish have washed up dead in Arkansas; 5,000 red-winged blackbirds fell from the sky on New Year’s Eve in the community of Beebe, northeast of Little Rock; 500 dead birds were discovered in Louisiana; 100 jackdaw birds were found lying dead in the street in Sweden; several hundred birds found dead in Kentucky; 100s of dead snapper wash up on a beach in New Zealand; 40,000 dead crabs wash up on the beach in the UK; an estimated 200 fish wash up on the shores in Maryland; 100 tonnes of sardines are found on beaches in Brazil.

Finally, in possibly the strangest turn of events of recent times, North Korean state television broadcast the first ever Western movie to be shown in the dictatorial state- and chose Bend It Like Beckham.

Continue reading "Is it the end of the world as we know it?" »