http://www.thepunch.com.au/author-bios/dan-hanks/ Dan’s career in writing got off to a rocky start when he was tasked by his primary school newspaper to review the now infamous ‘Hand of God’ Mexico ’86 World Cup clash. He was promptly sacked after it was revealed he had no journalistic integrity whatsoever when it came to England and football, but given he was only paid in sweets he was unduly concerned (and ironically now writes for much less). Since that time he has moved into novels, screenplays and advertising, while cramming in a job as an editorial consultant and writing the odd article his co-commuters get to ridicule before anyone else. The bare bones of his writing life can be found on his website (http://www.danhanks.com), or you can follow his bi-annual tweets on Twitter (http://twitter.com/dfrhanks) en Copyright 2012 The Punch penberthyd@newsltd.com.au penberthyd@newsltd.com.au Sat, 26 May 2012 20:00:49 +0000 Sat, 26 May 2012 20:00:49 +0000 Politics, opinion, world news, sports news, latest news, views, Barack Obama, Kevin Rudd, Julia Gillard, Nathan Rees, Malcolm Turnbull, Peter Garrett, Barnaby Joyce, Australian, federal politics, opinion polls, election, The Punch, thepunch, punch ExpressionEngine 1.6.7 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss 15 http://www.thepunch.com.au/images/punch-logo-rss.png http://www.thepunch.com.au/ 144 70 Politics, political opinion, world news, sports news and the latest news and views updated live, daily on The Punch - Australia's best conversation. Search The Punch keywords http://www.thepunch.com.au/search/ http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/whatever-you-eat-theres-better-way-for-meat/ There are lots of things in our lives that cause animal, human or environmental harm. Some we already know about. Others we blindly ignore until an intrepid investigator breaks the story. Even the most innovative or seemingly innocent products can have a murky past. Angry Birds loses its fun when you consider the Apple workers committing suicide in China. And Valentine’s Day becomes ever so slightly more nauseating when you learn that those chocolates you bought the mother of your children may have furthered the slave trade of other children in Africa (at least, that’s what I told her when I forgot to buy them). Human actions always seem to have an impact somewhere in the world.  All we can do is try to mitigate or fix the problem once we are made aware and move on better for it. Except, it seems, with meat production. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/whatever-you-eat-theres-better-way-for-meat/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/whatever-you-eat-theres-better-way-for-meat/#item7788 Fri, 17 Feb 2012 19:55:15 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/ICB-Hey-weatherman-just-tell-me-if-I-need-a-jacket/ I freely admit that in the past few years I’ve remained unable to acclimatise properly to this beautiful country’s extremes, occasionally moaning either about the heat or the cold—when back home I’d break out the deckchair and whack a hanky on my head the minute the clouds broke. At present we’re at the start of an Australian winter. For me, that should rightly be like an English summer. And while there are some truly gorgeous days cropping up now and then, you just can’t tell how it’s going to pan out. My main beef is with the wind chill factor. Or lack of it. That’s right, people who report the weather, I said wind. Just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. It’s out there, even now, blowing shit around. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/ICB-Hey-weatherman-just-tell-me-if-I-need-a-jacket/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/ICB-Hey-weatherman-just-tell-me-if-I-need-a-jacket/#item6039 Thu, 09 Jun 2011 02:45:13 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/Giving-bith-really-aint-what-it-used-to-be/ As a general rule, men and women know squat about babies. At least until they have to raise one. Then it’s time to knuckle down and survive the crying and vegemite poo, striving for the same primal instinct that enabled our ancestors to find shelter without iPhones and run barefoot across rocky terrain, chasing the evening meal with only a large toothpick and loincloth for protection. Giving birth, so we have been led to believe, was much the same thing. A labour, in all senses of the word, to be endured rather than enjoyed; a period of a couple of hours (if you were lucky) or a couple of days (if you were not) where all you could do was grit your teeth and hope for the best, as nature intended. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/Giving-bith-really-aint-what-it-used-to-be/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/Giving-bith-really-aint-what-it-used-to-be/#item5996 Fri, 03 Jun 2011 19:55:30 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/we-should-all-love-animals-not-in-a-weird-way/ We like to think of ourselves as a nation of animal lovers. We bay for blood when a woman throws a cat in a bin in the UK, or a team of huskies is massacred in Canada, and are brought to tears when a Queensland hero risks his life in the floods to save a kangaroo from drowning. Yet every single day there are stories in the shadows we miss. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/we-should-all-love-animals-not-in-a-weird-way/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/we-should-all-love-animals-not-in-a-weird-way/#item5070 Thu, 10 Feb 2011 19:38:00 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/sing-a-long-sex-talking-dirty-on-itunes/ I was browsing iTunes this week, searching for distractions to avoid whatever I was actually supposed to be doing, when something caught my eye and revealed I had apparently grown old overnight. It was the music charts, featuring sex. And lots of it.  At 1—“Dirty Talk” (Wynter Gordon),  At 3—“S&M” (Rihanna), At 9—“Tonight (I’m F****n’ You)” (Enrique Iglesias, clearly reluctant to beat around the bush). feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/sing-a-long-sex-talking-dirty-on-itunes/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/sing-a-long-sex-talking-dirty-on-itunes/#item4952 Wed, 26 Jan 2011 19:55:17 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/a-journey-into-the-dark-heart-of-troll-country/ Once upon a time there was a writer who lived in a cottage nestled among the hills. The cottage was near the river Internet, over which was a sturdy bridge, The Punch. It seemed idyllic - and indeed it was, dear reader, until one day it became clear that the gurgling he could hear from his bedroom window at night was not the sound of water, but rather, deep under the bridge, in the comments section, the grumblings of a troll. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/a-journey-into-the-dark-heart-of-troll-country/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/a-journey-into-the-dark-heart-of-troll-country/#item4911 Thu, 20 Jan 2011 20:00:37 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/its-called-christmas-folks-with-a-capital-c/ Ho! Ho! Ho! Yes, it’s that time of year again, when political correctness rears its ugly head and the majority of us are gifted the opportunity for a little righteous indignation with our eggnog. Except nobody told new Victorian Premier Ted Baillieu.  In a bold and somewhat surprising display of common sense for a politician, he has made an effort to bring the spirit of the season back into Australian schools, insisting children “have the opportunity to enjoy the simple pleasures of Christmas”. Praise the Lord indeed. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/its-called-christmas-folks-with-a-capital-c/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/its-called-christmas-folks-with-a-capital-c/#item4602 Wed, 01 Dec 2010 02:59:59 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/when-good-toys-go-offensive/ You know the scene. We’ve all been there, checking out the shelves of goodies in Toys ‘R’ Us, searching for the perfect gift for our kids, nephews, nieces or grandchildren. Suddenly a child runs past, squealing in delight after spotting ‘the toy’. The very same they’ve been diligently saving up their pocket money to buy. Everyone else has one. And now, finally, it’s their turn. As they thrust the box into the air like the captain of a championship-winning football team, the parent in tow reluctantly takes it from them, skipping the name and any other pointless details as their gaze heads straight for the price tag. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/when-good-toys-go-offensive/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/when-good-toys-go-offensive/#item4521 Sun, 21 Nov 2010 19:55:37 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/justin-bieber-as-luke-skywalker-would-they-dare/ There was a collective, global sigh yesterday, when it appeared that hell had indeed frozen over and the inevitable had happened. Hollywood was remaking what cannot be remade. If you hadn’t noticed, they’ve been working up to it for a while. The Karate Kid (with Kung Fu), Clash of the Titans, A Nightmare on Elm Street, another Robin Hood (with a Robin and Marion surely too old to be climbing trees), more Predators, more Aliens, more Predators AND Aliens, Indy 4, Die Hard 4, Rambo 4, Rocky 6, and even news of Top Gun 2, set to take us back into the exciting world of… drone pilots. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/justin-bieber-as-luke-skywalker-would-they-dare/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/justin-bieber-as-luke-skywalker-would-they-dare/#item4500 Wed, 17 Nov 2010 19:35:01 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/why-we-should-remember-not-to-forget/ But for a sniper’s sticky trigger, I would not be sitting here writing a last minute article about forgetting to remember Remembrance Day. For those whose history is a little fuzzy, what was first known as Armistice Day commemorates the moment the guns of the Western Front fell silent at the end of the First World War, at 11am on 11 November 1918.  It became Remembrance Day after the Second World War, and has since become an opportunity for us to pay tribute to all those who have made the ultimate sacrifice in conflicts past and present. At 11am, time stands still. feedback@thepunch.com.au (Dan Hanks) Article http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/why-we-should-remember-not-to-forget/#comments http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/why-we-should-remember-not-to-forget/#item4445 Wed, 10 Nov 2010 19:40:54 +0000 Dan Hanks | Author bios | The Punch