Jo Thornely
Jo Thornely spent too long at art school and now works in television, neither of which have anything at all to do with writing. She writes opinion pieces for The Daily Telegraph and freelances wherever unnecessary hyperbole and the excessive use of hyphens are required.
Articles by Jo Thornely
How to spot a “vom-com” in 10 easy steps
I am not a fan of romantic comedies, or as they’re called in my living room when I’m alone and…... Read more
You won’t fool the children of the anti-resolution
I hardly ever keep my New Year’s Resolutions, including the last two, which were Don’t Make Any More New Year’s…... Read more
Coastal holidays of your dreams: Ettalong Beach
Just an hour away from Sydney by train, 45 minutes by car and a constant 18,000 kilometres from fashion is…... Read more
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells CROCK
I can’t do Christmas carols any more. I can’t. I can maybe handle Jingle Bells, but only because my brain…... Read more
Government brushes holey molars for holy rollers
With the Federal Budget adjusted this week in an attempt to drag us back into the black, it’s time to…... Read more
Oi Barry! Leave the money on the fridge, would ya?
Dear Mr Obama, Thanks heaps for your beaut speech to Parliament this week, in which you used heaps of Australian…... Read more
So you want to be famous? Here’s how…
Look, I’m sick of this not-being-famous crap. Enough’s enough. I want my fifteen minutes, and I’m not just talking jail…... Read more
Gillard should have bobbed. It’s just common curtsy
Tired of scrutinising slow-mo footage of suspicious ripples in Beyonce’s baby bump, I’m pleased to announce that we’re free to…... Read more
Ho, ho, ho! It’s a Father Christmas shortage!
Not enough people are applying for the job of Local Shopping Centre Santa. People are un-applying in plague proportions. Turns…... Read more
A handy guide to complaining about stuff
Life as a switched-on, concerned and indignant citizen can be confusing. There are so many options. From screaming leftie to…... Read more
These movie producers are getting a bit too Footloose
Dear big Hollywood cigar-smoking guys: If you make a cake and everyone likes it, you can make it again. Nobody…... Read more
We’re either doing great, or we’re totally screwed
You know what? As a society, I reckon we must be doing pretty well. There are still just as many…... Read more
Racist loonies have taken leave of their census
As an amateur statistics enthusiast and avid filler-in of forms, I LOVE census time. It appeals to my social curiosity…... Read more
School kids should walk the dog, not walk with God
My sister enrolled her son in primary school this week, and wrote ‘No’ on the enrolment form next to ‘Scripture’,…... Read more
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Abbott’s crass logic: trash the Parliament in order save it
An email was sent to almost every politician in Australia this week saying that someone should cut off…
Our special forces don’t always need special treatment
We admire them, but we’re not entirely sure why. We allow them to operate in the shadows; we rarely…
A good holiday is about unrest, not rest
Like a fat full-stop, it lay in my hand. A small orange – not exactly fresh, but purchased anyway…
Nosebleed Section
choice ringside rantings
From: They must pay for one’s bitter disappointments
Michael S says:
"A teacher at Geelong Grammar had criticised her for using words that were too long, which had left her confused and had made her doubt her ability to write essays. She became ''quite distressed'' when her English marks began to fall." I can sympathise. My scholastic mentors conveyed to me a causal relationship… [read more]From: Welfare for breeders is a bonus for everyone
Change Up! says:
I have no problem paying my taxes. As a single, childless person on a very decent income, I can afford it and not have my life severely altered. Plus I understand that my taxes paying for things like schools, childcare and infrastructure is ultimately a good thing. A better community is better for me… [read more]Gentle jabs to the ribs
They must pay for one’s bitter disappointments
A private school girl’s family is sueing her elite, extremely expensive private school for not… Read more
