Jo Thornely
Jo Thornely spent too long at art school and now works in television, neither of which have anything at all to do with writing. She writes opinion pieces for The Daily Telegraph and freelances wherever unnecessary hyperbole and the excessive use of hyphens are required.
Articles by Jo Thornely
How to spot a “vom-com” in 10 easy steps
I am not a fan of romantic comedies, or as they’re called in my living room when I’m alone and…... Read more
You won’t fool the children of the anti-resolution
I hardly ever keep my New Year’s Resolutions, including the last two, which were Don’t Make Any More New Year’s…... Read more
Coastal holidays of your dreams: Ettalong Beach
Just an hour away from Sydney by train, 45 minutes by car and a constant 18,000 kilometres from fashion is…... Read more
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells CROCK
I can’t do Christmas carols any more. I can’t. I can maybe handle Jingle Bells, but only because my brain…... Read more
Government brushes holey molars for holy rollers
With the Federal Budget adjusted this week in an attempt to drag us back into the black, it’s time to…... Read more
Oi Barry! Leave the money on the fridge, would ya?
Dear Mr Obama, Thanks heaps for your beaut speech to Parliament this week, in which you used heaps of Australian…... Read more
So you want to be famous? Here’s how…
Look, I’m sick of this not-being-famous crap. Enough’s enough. I want my fifteen minutes, and I’m not just talking jail…... Read more
Gillard should have bobbed. It’s just common curtsy
Tired of scrutinising slow-mo footage of suspicious ripples in Beyonce’s baby bump, I’m pleased to announce that we’re free to…... Read more
Ho, ho, ho! It’s a Father Christmas shortage!
Not enough people are applying for the job of Local Shopping Centre Santa. People are un-applying in plague proportions. Turns…... Read more
A handy guide to complaining about stuff
Life as a switched-on, concerned and indignant citizen can be confusing. There are so many options. From screaming leftie to…... Read more
These movie producers are getting a bit too Footloose
Dear big Hollywood cigar-smoking guys: If you make a cake and everyone likes it, you can make it again. Nobody…... Read more
We’re either doing great, or we’re totally screwed
You know what? As a society, I reckon we must be doing pretty well. There are still just as many…... Read more
Racist loonies have taken leave of their census
As an amateur statistics enthusiast and avid filler-in of forms, I LOVE census time. It appeals to my social curiosity…... Read more
School kids should walk the dog, not walk with God
My sister enrolled her son in primary school this week, and wrote ‘No’ on the enrolment form next to ‘Scripture’,…... Read more
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The Punch is moving house
Good morning Punchers. After four years of excellent fun and great conversation, this is the final post…
Will Pope Francis have the vision to tackle this?
I have had some close calls, one that involved what looked to me like an AK47 pointed my way, followed…
Advocating risk management is not “victim blaming”
In a world in which there are still people who subscribe to the vile notion that certain victims of sexual…
Nosebleed Section
choice ringside rantings
From: Hasbro, go straight to gaol, do not pass go
Tim says:
They should update other things in the game too. Instead of a get out of jail free card, they should have a Dodgy Lawyer card that not only gets you out of jail straight away but also gives you a fat payout in compensation for daring to arrest you in the first place. Instead of getting a hotel when you… [read more]From: A guide to summer festivals especially if you wouldn’t go
Kel says:
If you want a festival for older people or for families alike, get amongst the respectable punters at Bluesfest. A truly amazing festival experience to be had of ALL AGES. And all the young "festivalgoers" usually write themselves off on the first night, only to never hear from them again the rest of… [read more]Gentle jabs to the ribs
Superman needs saving
Can somebody please save Superman? He seems to be going through a bit of a crisis. Eighteen months ago,… Read more
