Jacqueline Pascarl
Jacqueline has been a writer and social activist since the age of 8 - penning her first protest note regarding anti-abortion posters affixed to the door of the local church. Upon receiving the strap from her school principal, Sr Philomena, Jacqueline noted with satisfaction the nun’s comments on her unique writing style and use of grammar and punctuation.
A genuine fallen princess of the royal variety and sometime subject of media interest, she has been deployed as an humanitarian aid worker & Special Ambassador everywhere from war zones in The Balkans and East Timor, to Maasai villages in Kenya, and on Nelson Mandela’s child literacy projects in South Africa. She has lectured at the European Union and the US State Department on human rights issues and given speeches at the United Nations, but she considers her scariest time of gainful employment to be her stint with Australia’s television networks where she worked as an investigative reporter, journalist, producer, documentary film maker and presenter.
With three bestselling books published in thirty languages – most of which she cannot understand – (although she does speak eight tongues badly), Jacqueline has been a correspondent for BBC Radio and contributed to magazines whilst managing to breed in all her reproductive decades, popping out four children now aged 6 to 26. She can drive a truck and has commanded a platoon of military types whilst under fire. (The bullet missed.)
Jacqueline has received several awards including a UN Commendation. During the Victorian Bushfire Emergency, Jacqueline organised massive relief efforts in convoys of vehicles and distributed aid across the state – a portion of her daily journals were reproduced in Black Saturday – Stories of Love, Loss & Courage from the Victorian Bushfires, published by HarperCollins/News Ltd.
A self-appointed arbiter of good taste and modern etiquette, Jacqueline is currently working on three new books due to a love of multi-tasking, and blogs regularly at jacquelinepascarl.blogspot.com. She admits to being a hopeless chocoholic and having an abysmal attitude to sports.
Articles by Jacqueline Pascarl
Hell has been franchised and it’s hiding in the suburbs
Ikea dearest, I remember the excitement as your latest tome plopped into my letterbox with the all the promise of…... Read more
The plot is lost, I’ve happily gone mad in suburbia
The camel is broken, I’ve lost the plot and, quite frankly, it’s been absolutely liberating. \ Queue sharp intake of…... Read more
Food allergy fascists make peanuts of us all
Be afraid, be very afraid. The food Nazis are on the hunt through suburban school lunch boxes. Food is no…... Read more
When your body is trying to tell you something, listen
The liberation that several near death experiences in quick succession gives you is, well, liberating. And on that note fellas,…... Read more
Cakes are the least of poor Bindi’s worries
Cake schmake. Just shut up and pass the eggs! Dave Penberthy’s musings about Rosemary Stanton’s rant on the evil of…... Read more
An open letter to men with fast cars and fancy watches
Nothing screams erectile dysfunction as loudly as a diamond encrusted Rolex. In my vast experience of travelling the globe, participating…... Read more
The truth behind the burqa
Before this commentary gets underway, I feel that it is necessary to close the gate before the horse bolts. So…... Read more
Cosmetic work can make you mistake chit-chat for orgasm
If one’s face can’t register an orgasm, is the climax still as good? Startling as it may seem, I feel…... Read more
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RT @public_defender: #Westpac waits till the minute after the evening news bulletins' #ANZ stories go to air to raise its variable #interestrates by 0.1%. Hmmm.
@nadinevoncohen do you have a keyboard shortcut for the first two words of each tweet, or is it a type each time deal?
@joekiely an Irish ghost called a mist fairy comes on dark road and pushes you into the ditch. nothing to do with six pints
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Would you kill for a job?
Who would work in an abattoir? Most of us have done jobs we didn’t want to do because we needed…
Friday Dilemma: child cruelty or harmless fun?
Parenting. It’s the new oneupmanship. Ah, how quaint the days now seem when parents could raise…
Hipsters with hip replacements
Someone once told me that when people reach a certain age they begin dressing in the manner they did…
Nosebleed Section
choice ringside rantings
From: Punch on: Open thread 09/02/2012
marley says:
I'm one of the older ones, so I've certainly seen a few changes in my time. When I started school I learned to write with a nib pen, dipped in an inkwell (no, I'm not kidding). My mother became a dab hand at getting inkstains out of my clothes. Flicking ink at one another in the classroom was an essential… [read more]From: I’d rather have a piece of toast than listen to crap lyrics
Erick says:
Led Zeppelin are responsible for my all-time favourite mixed metaphor: "There you sit, sit and stare, like a book on a shelf rusting." (Misty Mountain Hop) I laugh every time I hear it. Hmmm, I believe I've decided what to play on the way to work today. [read more]Gentle jabs to the ribs
No wuckin forries. These nuckin futs are tuckin fops
Well, puck me with a fitchfork. The F-word is apparently an acceptable part of Australian speech. That’s… Read more