Hi. My name is Ashlee. I’m a 24 year old Australian woman. I have a relatively successful media career for my age, given the current economic climate. I currently live and work in Indonesia. I have always tried to give back to the communities in which I live through volunteering and I don’t have a criminal record. I do have a gym membership though. I’m doing OK. Oh, but I forgot to add, I am fat.

Actually, I should say obese, according to my BMI.
And apparently this makes me some kind of social pariah who should be the target of intense public ridicule and scorn, no matter what food I may or may not put in my mouth, no matter how many times a week I work out.
Because my body is apparently everybody’s business and thus it is a stranger’s right to pass judgement on me based on my shape, to make loud remarks on my body’s burden on the taxpayer and to make sweeping generalizations about the lifestyle choices I must have made to get so “disgustingly” rotund, without knowing a single thing about me.
I’m lucky that I was brought up by parents who never for a moment let me believe that my body size should stop me from doing anything. I’ve squeezed into wet suits to go caving, tube through underwater rivers and raft Grade 5 rapids, despite sneering sideways glances. I’ve trekked over hills in scorching heat searching for carnivorous giant lizards in Komodo National Park in Indonesia, despite my short stubby legs.
I’ve lived overseas more than once, even though in Jakarta that has meant having my arm flab constantly grabbed and remarked upon in local markets by little old ladies.
I work out at the gym with the beautiful people and I took ballet and drama lessons and performed until the age of 16, despite being the fattest little ballerina the Albury-Wodonga Eisteddfod had ever seen and on multiple occasions having Jaffas or popcorn thrown at me by teenage boys from the front row of the audience while they audibly whisper-chanted “fatty fatty fatty”.
I feel fortunate that I have the confidence and mettle to keep doing the things I love, even when frequently ridiculed because of my size. But many other women (and men too) have had their confidence completely shot by barbed attacks. I have a friend who was so brutally mocked in the changeroom of a gym that she cannot bring herself to return. Another is still traumatized from the nastiness of high school gym, even into her mid 20’s.
One friend, who I would consider a relatively normal size, told me how she was in tears after a woman told her off at the checkouts for buying the ingredients to bake her kid cousin’s birthday cake because she was “too fat to be eating that and shouldn’t you buy some vegetables.” On the other hand, a naturally very slender friend is frequently told to “eat something”, which is no less offensive. It seems that when it comes to commenting on weight, all gloves are off, politeness is left at home and no punch is too far below the belt.
The current social discourse on health and lifestyle and the potential problems of increasing rates of overweight and obese people, which is obviously an important issue that needs to be discussed, seems to be used by many as a justification for body slander. The fat are lazy, no-good burdens on the taxpayer who must spend their days sitting on the sofa while stuffing their faces full of transfat-filled snacks and hence deserve to be belittled — read any major news website and a large portion of comments will follow this line of argument. Health is indeed highly important, and despite popular belief, some fat people understand this.
For example, I personally enjoy both physical activity and vegetables. But there is one aspect of the obesity health debate that is often neglected — mental health.
How can we expect people to feel confident enough to get involved in physical activity when they are being belittled and attacked? How can we expect the fat kid in the class to enjoy school sports if they are teased in the changerooms and mocked for not being a fast runner? As long as body shape discrimination is allowed and encouraged by society, there will always be a barrier to inclusion for those whose shape puts them outside what is deemed “acceptable.”
Maybe policy goals to fight the “obesity epidemic” needs to reframed so they don’t necessarily endorse one body shape over another and instead focus on other indicators of health, such as blood sugar, blood pressure, healthy diets and exercise. The current focus only seems to be encouraging blatant discrimination rather than making headway on the issue. It’s time for fresh thinking so that all aspects of health can be addressed. If we remove the hate from the weight debate, then perhaps we can have pragmatic conversations about public health policy and body confidence without merely throwing blame back and forward between the skinnies and the fatties. It’s food for thought.
- Ashlee Betteridge is an Australian journalist who lives in Indonesia. Her website can be found at www.bettylovesblogging.com
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