Islands may sink beneath seas; coral may die; species may become extinct. Floods and droughts and heat-related deaths may soar. But sit down, people – climate change is also threatening our wine industry!

Such a shame that the so-called chardonnay socialists are probably on the climate change bandwagon already – but maybe all those doctors’ wives we hear so much about at election time will see their beloved niche varietals under threat and decide the time to act is upon us.
According to climate change scientist and wine expert Leanne Webb temperature increases mean grapes ripen earlier, creating more full-bodied wines, while consumers are keener on more elegant drops.
First world problems, eh? Up there with dwindling ski seasons.
Her study of climate change’s effects on the wine industry will be published in next month’s Global Change Biology.
Meanwhile, an increasingly desperate government has released a bunch of snazzy “fact sheets” that basically collate previously accessible information in order to bolster their carbon pricing plans.
O
Prime Minister Julia Gillard said the fact sheets show:
1. That other countries are acting to cut emissions.
2. That Australia is not too pissant to make a difference.
3. That international negotiations are continuing. Australia is not alone.
She and Climate Change Minister Greg Combet were repeatedly challenged by journalists on what carbon pricing will actually achieve; and they kept frantically kept referring back to the user-friendly fact sheets.
They need all the diagrammatic and climate-change-for-idiots help they can get.
Nobody’s listening to them.
Yesterday’s Essential Report found that not only do most Australians – 54 per cent - now disapprove of Ms Gillard’s performance, but only half of them even believe that “climate change is happening and is caused by human activity”.
Which bodes fairly poorly for the Gillard Government, about to hit its anniversary and trying to introduce a carbon tax.
Predictably, the report shows that 83 per cent of Greens voters think humans are causing climate change; just one in three Liberal or National voters do; and about two thirds of Labor voters. Younger people think it’s happening. Older people not so much.
What’s interesting, then, is how on earth any government will convince Australians that we need to act on anthropogenic global warming. Because pretty much every politician – with the glaring exception of Bob Katter, who apparently read 40 Terry Pratchett novels and decided AGW was bunkum – says it’s happening.
Including, of course, Opposition Leader Tony Abbott, even if he pretends to sound unconvinced in front of certain audiences.
So – climate change sceptics – what would change your mind?
Think of this as an academic exercise. Is it at all possible that you will ever accept climate change is real and caused by humans?
Obviously Gillard’s not convincing. Nor Abbott. Nor Garnaut nor Blanchett, Hawke or Flannery. Not the CSIRO, not the IPCC, not the majority of climate scientists, not leading science journals, not most datasets. Not scientific institutes. They won’t convince you.
So, theoretically, what would make you think it’s real, we caused it, and we need to act?
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