We’re such tight arses when it comes to Dad

acotrel says:

07:44am | 28/08/12

My father died of a smoking related illness at age 63 in about 1977.  I’m ashamed to admit that I didn’t buy him one present in his whole lifetime.  But I did do one thing for him.  He was a WW2 ex-serviceman, and I took him to the Firepower Demo at Puckapunyal on the day they use the live ammo.  When he was in hospital dying, he suggested we should go there again.

P. Walker says:

11:44am | 28/08/12

Acotrel, I understand you even more as bits of you come seeping through….....;-(

Tubesteak says:

02:05pm | 28/08/12

It’s easy to read with all this light. Thanks dad

John F says:

08:20am | 28/08/12

I’ll also add that since my ex alienated me from my 2 oldest daughters the upcoming fathers day will be the 5th I havn’t seen them along with my 50th birthday.
To all the other dads who have had their childrens love stolen.
This Fathers Day
Your not alone

M says:

08:40am | 28/08/12

Thoughts are with you and dads in a similar situation, John.

Carz says:

08:51am | 28/08/12

My ex-husband arranged nothing with our kids for me for Mother’s Day this year. His birthday was soon afterwards and I ensured that the kids had presents for him. And I will do the same for Father’s Day. Not all ex-wives are bitches, however there are some ex-husbands who are.

fairsfair says:

09:30am | 28/08/12

We never bought mum or dad gifts until we had jobs. Prior to that it was a crappy card, a pasta necklace, a poor drawing. All this was done at school.

I will say though I did scoff at the junk mail yesterday “for dad”. Around Mothers day it is all jewellery catalogues with the $2000 stuff on the front. For fathers day it was BWS and Dan Murphys.

If I ever con some poor sucker into having babies with me the gifts exchanged will be made. I would never expect my partner to buy a gift from the kids. When did these days go from the Friday before’s craft activity task, burnt toast made in the loudest way possible to some sort of major undertaking for families with young kids?

Jeremy says:

10:17am | 28/08/12

I think in general: not all people are bitches, but some are. No need to subgroup any further.

It’s sad though that adults can be so damn childish even though they know better. This year dad will be getting a morning sailing lesson, then bocce by the beach with some nice beers. Good start to the Spring.

Alex says:

10:24am | 28/08/12

My boy’s father and I are not together, (and haven’t been since I was pregnant), but I always make the effort to do something for his birthday, father’s day, and Christmas from his son.  I don’t understand how some ex partners can be so uncaring.  And I always will (until he’s old enough to do it himself of course!)

iMitchy says:

10:39am | 28/08/12

I have three kids, the oldest turned 2 on Sunday and the others are 5 month old twins. Our oldest was born just before Father’s Day and my wife still organised a present for me (a framed photo of my daughter and I with an engraved plaque commemorating my first Father’s Day).

The kids are too young to understand what the day means and obviously don’t make or buy anything to gift. That is fine. The way my wife and I see it, Mother’s and Father’s Day are days to thank your partner for their role in parenting, and to thank them for all the extra stuff they do to free up a little of your time or make your day easier so you can place more focus on the kids.

@fairs,
I know it was in jest but I think your comment: “If I ever con some poor sucker into having babies with me…” was in poor taste. For all the John F’s in the world, it is true to say that some didn’t just chance upon their situation. I personally know women (well, one woman particularly) who are in relationships for the sole reason of a wedding day, having kids, a free house and not having to work again. By the time the last kiddie is out the plan is to divorce and take all you can get.
My friends and I have done all we can to protect one innocent guy from said one woman (who by the way was our friend before we met the guy), but she is very manipulative and he is about as bright as a teletubbie so we’ve had little success.

Scotchfinger says:

11:32am | 28/08/12

iMitchy,

All men become teletubbies in the presence of good-looking women.

iMitchy says:

03:57pm | 28/08/12

@Scotchfinger,

Wouldn’t describe her as good looking. Six foot five and 100+kgs. He is 7 foot or so and around 140kgs. They look oddly “right” together, but she’s just a total biatch and he wouldn’t hurt a fly. He’s being majorly taken advantage of.

Scotchfinger says:

04:34pm | 28/08/12

hell iMitchy, what a pair of monsters. My advice? Just stay out of the way, you can’t stop assortative mating. Imagine the children/troll-things to come out of such a pairing *marvels*

M says:

04:41pm | 28/08/12

<For all the John F’s in the world, it is true to say that some didn’t just chance upon their situation. I personally know women (well, one woman particularly) who are in relationships for the sole reason of a wedding day, having kids, a free house and not having to work again. By the time the last kiddie is out the plan is to divorce and take all you can get.
My friends and I have done all we can to protect one innocent guy from said one woman (who by the way was our friend before we met the guy), but she is very manipulative and he is about as bright as a teletubbie so we’ve had little success. >

Someone remind me again, what advantage is there in being married for a man?

Scotchfinger says:

05:50pm | 28/08/12

‘What advantage is there in being married for a man?’
Well, for one thing, your mates stop trying to set you up with dodgy chicks. Instead, you get to do the matchmaking! Much more fun, particularly if you really milk the smugness.

nihonin says:

08:46am | 28/08/12

I’m the same with my kids, when they ask what I want for Fathers Day, I tell them the same thing every year, their company is all I need, money can’t buy that.

Anubis says:

09:09am | 28/08/12

Okay @M, I’ll bite. You say “Cause, you know, it’s mum.”  And why does this sort of sentiment not apply to the dad who is out working to feed, educate, entertain and clothe the family? Sacrificing what should be family time so that junior can get the next “must have” on the endless shopping lists of youths.

M says:

09:27am | 28/08/12

Cause dad doesn’t really give much of a damn about fathers day Christmas and birthdays are enough he reckons. He’d rather just have our company for dinner.

James1 says:

10:58am | 28/08/12

I agree with your dad.  It’s a day invented by shops to sell things to suckers.  Usually I just ask my daughter to draw me a picture or something.

Scotchfinger says:

12:09pm | 28/08/12

@James1, I hope you encourage your child and don’t accept the usual drunken scrawl:
http://www.theatlanticwire.com/entertainment/2011/06/aelita-andre-chelsea-agora-gallery/38559/
http://akiane.com/home

Admiral Ackbar says:

12:39pm | 28/08/12

“It’s a day invented by shops to sell things to suckers.”

Exactly, just like Christmas and Easter. And Valentines day. And so on.

This is the thing though, guys just don’t give a crap about buying material things when there is clearly no need as there are more important things in life.

James1 says:

12:43pm | 28/08/12

After seeing those, my expectations are considerably higher.  From now on, if MoMA won’t accept it, neither will I.

That said, last time I visted MoMA, it seemed to have its fair share of drunken scrawl…

M says:

12:55pm | 28/08/12

Yeah, but don’t get anything for her on V day and woe betide you.

Scotchfinger says:

01:05pm | 28/08/12

I urge patience, and remember these wise words from a profoundly gifted child:

‘No matter what distance we cross - each step is still an infinity’

*humble silence, trying to figure out what it means, and failing*

James1 says:

01:19pm | 28/08/12

Not my wife, M.  She actually shares my view, and thinks that Valentines Day is the most meaningless of them all.  Also, she understands that she must wait until I get killed before interrupting my game of Battlefield 3, because you cannot pause when playing online. 

These two things are the key to a lasting relationship.  Everything else is details.

M says:

01:36pm | 28/08/12

Truly you arre one of the lucky ones James. What I wouldn’t give for a woman who understands how important online gaming is to me.

Admiral Ackbar says:

02:49pm | 28/08/12

Damn James1. You sir, are truly living the dream.

Nathan Explosion says:

02:59pm | 28/08/12

@M The Missus doesn’t interrupt me playing WoW, and I don’t interrupt her in the middle of an RPG boss battle.

Yak says:

09:11am | 28/08/12

What is it with wives and presents? Not an original idea for a pressie, ever. I can’t say that I haven’t been surprised by one of her gifts, but the surprise is usually for the outrageously boring nature of her selection. One birthday will forever be remembered for the exciting Pillow I received. True, it was one of those foam curvey one’s that keep your back straight whilst sleeping, but seriously, a pillow? For Xmas I got a voucher to a Beauty Salon. I took the manicure/pedicure option as the least traumatic for the poor lass assigned the impossible mission.
My boy had a birthday recently and received a weight-loss book. You could see the joy in his face as he took it out of the Woolies plastic bag. This was a gift that kept on giving; anxiety, depression, low self-esteem.
I love her dearly, but not for her gift giving prowess.

Nathan Explosion says:

10:04am | 28/08/12

My wife gives me great presents!

One year she surprised me a Guitar Hero pack, and a DS game and DVD I wanted. Brilliant! Her presents to me are much more inspired than the ones I give her.

Snorks says:

12:02pm | 28/08/12

My wife complains that I never give her any ideas.
I keep telling her I give her ideas all the time, she just doesn’t pay attention.
That walk around the Bunnings store on the weekend, when I stopped and picked something up and put it down again, that was a clue.
For her presents, i usually get her something that she said she wanted 6 months ago, I just make a menal note of it.
Admittedly, this will occasionally backfire because she no longer needs / wants the item, but for the most part they are well received.

Amastaycia says:

12:44pm | 28/08/12

Not all wives are bad - I put a lot of thought into gift giving to my husband, always trying to get something he would love from both myself and his son (my step-son)

This fathers day for example he is getting a very much wanted board game imported from the US (as you can’t get it here) from his son, and a set of glasses from me and our yet to be born baby (he constenetly complains about not having the appropriate size glasses for his drinks.

I think a better statement here would be - yes some ‘people’ suck at gift giving but it’s not always the wife/husband/woman/man. It goes for many different people

Scotchfinger says:

01:46pm | 28/08/12

‘not all wives are bad’
oh dear, are you new to the Punch? *sorrowful shake of the head* Let me give you some advice: apologise for that statement, admit that its opposite is true, and the Punchers will forgive you (I hope).

*chants* My eyes have been opened to the downright evil of succubus women and the endless patience and innocence of men, thanks to this site. Before, I knew nothing!

Louie the laughing at Scotchy today Fly says:

05:26pm | 28/08/12

Scotchy,
WHAT is in your coffee today?
I need some.

Scotchfinger says:

05:46pm | 28/08/12

Louie, it’s hell living in my head. Would not wish on anyone.

Scotchfinger says:

11:38am | 28/08/12

great comment Michael, nothing more to add. Except perhaps to mention the odd, high ringing tone hears after a toddler has shrieked his little lungs out, approximately 2 inches from one’s cochlea. A gift!

fairsfair says:

09:21am | 28/08/12

Thats nice to hear.

My dad has expensive taste so we all pitch in and buy him his SnapOn impact sockets, because thats all he wants. At least we now he will use them if not just stare at them lovingly.

It is different with Fathers and Sons though I think. All my Dad wants is my brother to spend some time with him, but he won’t. So they continue to pretend that each of them doesn’t like the other when in all honesty they just want to hug it out and have a beer. Men. I don’t understand them.

Plus Lucy you forgot #4 - mothers who buy themselves their presents. Of course they are going to spend more!

Tubesteak says:

12:15pm | 28/08/12

fairsfair
That’s sad to hear. All of my family gets along really well. There’s only 4 of us (mum, dad, my brother and I) but we’re tight!

Scotchfinger says:

03:30pm | 28/08/12

fairs, this Sunday take the whole family out to the pub, then casually mention that you and your mum need to go to the loo. Leave the pub with your mum. Come back in an hour, to find your dad and brother downing their sixth beer, laughing and slapping each other’s shoulders, saying things like, ‘yeah, I was a bit of a wanker wasn’t I?’ and, ‘no, I prefer Elle Mac, but to each his own.’ You and your mum say something smooth like ‘ooh, silly us, we got lost!’ and the blokes will never be the wiser, thinking this is a credible explanation. Rift closed, everyone’s happy.

Louie the Fly says:

05:32pm | 28/08/12

I need one of those for Townsville - perfect for playing round Naggie Island Beaches.

Nathan Explosion says:

10:11am | 28/08/12

“...but Dads just spend less, want less and it’s therein explained.”

That’s true. My Dad always buys stacks of $5 white tee shirts from Cotton On.

M says:

11:02am | 28/08/12

My mother wails about how my father and I shop. Apparently it’s not a shopping trip unless you walk for 3 miles and spend 3 hours “browsing.” Dad and I walk in, buy what we want, and walk out again, all over in less than 15 minutes.

Mouse says:

11:27am | 28/08/12

hahahahaha! Thanks for that david….. I will have this unprintable picture in my head all day long now!  LOL   :oD

Ziggy says:

12:27pm | 28/08/12

Thanks James. Could be a mirror image of me! And thats all I want - it is just great.

John F says:

01:41pm | 28/08/12

My Dad is 86, diabetic, he has had both legs amputated and he lives alone on acearage in Sydney. Thanks to my ex he doesnt know his 4 grandchildren. Parental alienation hasn’t just effected me it’s also touched him. He has tried to contact my kids but they wont reply. He will die soon with know idea what his grandchildren even look like.

Nathan Explosion says:

03:06pm | 28/08/12

What! That’s insane. I sometimes buy wife a present and for Mother’s Day and say it’s from the cats, and she does the same on Father’s Day, but it’s certainly not expected.

Scotchfinger says:

04:21pm | 28/08/12

me and my li’l boy spend time at the Bachelor Pad Cafe. I read the paper, he runs around, charming and annoying patrons in equal measure. Life don’t get much better than those moments.