It went for 90 minutes, six times longer than the time allocated, so if you’re after a full transcript you’ll have to wait until Sunday.

Not since Kruschev banged his shoe on the table has the United Nations played host to a comparable level of madness, as Libya’s Colonel Gaddafi launched a sleep-deprived rant this morning which made Fidel Castro sound succint, Boris Yeltsin look dignified and Kim Jong-Il seem sane.

I’m not suggesting that you subject yourself to the above video in its entirety - it’s only 10 minutes long, no-one has yet bothered to upload the full 80 minutes - but the first couple of minutes are worth a look, as it seems Gadaffi has been mugged by the stationery aisle at Officeworks as he takes to the podium with a mountain of yellow legal paper and pieces of foolscap, and then waves like a sports star at the crowd before delivering his opus magnum. 

It’s hard to distill the speech into an intelligible format. But it covered everything from terrorism to the decline of capitalism to the assasination of John F Kennedy to Israel to the American civil rights movement to Somalian piracy to swine flu to responsibility for the Holocaust to the fact that he’d been up since 4am and needed a bit of a lie down.

Introduced by a Libyan diplomat as “the leader of the revolution, president of the African Union, King of Kings of Africa,” Colonel Gaddafi set the scene by referring to the UN Security Council as “a terror council” and then delivered some of the following gems:

On Obama: “We are happy and proud that a son of Africa is president of the U.S. in a place where blacks could not go in a bus where whites go.Obama is a glimpse in the dark, and I am afraid that we may go back to square one. Can you guarantee how America will governed after Obama? We are content and happy if Obama can stay forever as the president of America.”

On JFK: “We know that the Israeli Jack Ruby killed Lee Harvey Oswald, who had killed the president. And then this Israeli died. We have to know how and why this happened, so such things will not be repeated.”

On swine flu: “Perhaps this swine virus was one of those that was created in a laboratory and got out of control because it was going to be used as military weapon.”

On Somalian piracy: “These men are not pirates. We are the pirates. We are all pirates. We went there to their territorial waters, and they are just protecting the food of their children.”

On the Holocaust: “You are the ones who burned them, not us. You expelled them.”

On the Taliban: “If the Taliban wants to make a religious state, okay, like the Vatican. Does the Vatican constitute a danger against us? No.”

He also said that the problems of the Middle East could be solved with the creation of a new nation called “Isratine”.

Perhaps aware that he was drifting Gaddafi himself explains that his beat poetry stylings were in part the result of jetlag, and the fact that he was barred from pitching his bedouin tent in Central Park and had to erect it instead at Donald Trump’s place.

“I woke up at 4am, before dawn!” he cried. “You’re all tired after a sleepless night!”

“Everyone here today came across the Atlantic or the Pacific, and I ask you, why? Is this Jerusalem or Mecca? All of you have jetlag and are physically tired. Many of you are very tired because your biological mind should be asleep right now. Think about it, why should we continue to meet here in America?”

For all Gaddafi’s weirdness, there’s an interesting take on it here in The Financial Times by Gideon Rachman which argues that sections of the developing world (and not just the Arab world) will respond positively to aspects of what he says, particularly in his criticisms of the UN.
 
The person who probably hated it the most is British PM Gordon Brown who copped intense domestic flak over the release and repatriation of Lockerbie bomber Abdelbaset Ali al-Megrahi, and has been doing everything he can at the UN to avoid bumping into his new chum.

12 comments

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    • pete says:

      03:44pm | 24/09/09

      Has he had plastic surgery?  He looks weirder than Michael Jackson and almost twice as insane.

    • AT says:

      04:47pm | 24/09/09

      pete,

      I’ve always thought he looks like Robert Downey Jr. And there’s that Turkish bloke, PM or Prez. or something, who’s the spitting image of a shorter, plumper, moustachioed George Clooney. And of course Tilda Swinton bases her look on our Julia. And Kevin Rudd’s The Milky Bar Kid. And Obama looks like ancient Egyptian carvings. And Malcolm Fraser’s an Easter Island statue. And…

      Sorry, the spirit of his speech took hold for a minute, there.

    • watty says:

      05:28pm | 24/09/09

      What crazy?

      Qadaffi said the United Nations was past it’s use by date.

      Rudd said the Unirted Nations was past it’s use by date

      Qadaffi was seeking a “new world order”

      Rudd was seeking a “new world order”

      Qadaffi was long winded and at times unitelligble

      Rudd is always long winded and at times unintelligble.

      Qadaffi played to a packed house.

      Rudd played to an empty theatre.

      What crazy?

    • Keith says:

      05:57pm | 24/09/09

      Unfortunately, although Gadaffi’s answer was indeed unclear, simple, and   there is some difficulty in justifiably assigning it to the orator as implied in the statement, inasmuch as the precise correlation between the information you communicated and the facts, insofar as they can be determined and demonstrated, is such as to cause epistemological problems, of sufficient magnitude as to lay upon the logical and semantic resources of the English language a heavier burden than the orator can reasonably be expected to bear,  and If we do nothing,
      One: We implicitly agree with the speech.
      Two: if we issue a statement, we’ll just look foolish.
      Three: if we lodge a protest, it’ll be ignored.
      Four: we can’t cut off aid, because we don’t give them any.
      Five: if we break off diplomatic relations, we can’t negotiate the oil rig contracts.
      And six: if we declare war, it might just look as though we were over-reacting.

      Not to mention, this bloke is a wanker, the word has developed a metaphorical usage, in which to wank or to be a wanker implies egotistical and self-indulgent behaviour. This is the dominant meaning in Australia.

    • Duke says:

      07:33pm | 24/09/09

      “The British Government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa.” - G Dubya Bush

      - short, succinct, to the point…and infinitely more dangerous than Gaddafi’s spiel!

    • Chase Stevens says:

      08:02pm | 24/09/09

      I’m just going to declare myself the first Chancellor of Isratine. You heard it here first folks.

    • Daniel says:

      08:59pm | 24/09/09

      That is Democracy in action I guess.

    • Heléna says:

      10:43pm | 26/09/09

      I have not listened to the video and it’s not likely I will ;p

      but based only on what has been posted here, I think he struck a chord in his comments regarding Somalia, the Holocaust and a united Palestinian and Israeli state may be a totally impossible dream - but he may as well pitch it there does not seem a likelihood of any workable solution -  otherwise the man is a nutter - a 90 minute speech LOL!

    • Sam says:

      05:10pm | 30/09/09

      I watched most of his speech on YouTube, and I did not find it crazy at all. Israel and the US regularly make statements and act in a way as to imply that they believe the UN to be ineffective. Gaddafi was saying the same thing. It is a matter of fact that countless UN resolutions that go against the will of the US or Israel have been ignored by the US or Israel. The UN is a body without teeth except when the US’s interests are aligned with its symbolic gestures.

      Gaddafi’s interpriter had a crappy accent, so you tuned out and never tried to understand.

    • Sam says:

      01:42pm | 01/10/09

      He spoke of how Lybia agrees with the UN Charter but doesn’t support the UN’s action (or lack thereof) in the wars that have taken place since the ratification of that charter.

      He also asked how Saddam Hussien, the president of a country, could be hanged in a dark room by people who are neither identifiable nor in an official position to carry out justice. How can this happen in a supposedly civilised world? Don’t get me wrong, Saddam may have had it coming, but he should have at least been poisoned like Milosovic. Handing him over to people that “appear” to be Shi’ites is a manouver that smells like attempted provocation of Sunnis to me.. and what do ya know - it worked. What’s the death toll in Iraq upto… oh only some 1.5 MILLION CIVILIANS. No WMOD, no link to Al-Qaida, no Osama behind bars, no rebuttal of the controlled demolition “theory”.... It all stinks to high heaven. The UN ought to be ashamed of itself.

      Before the UN gets busy critising Israel for “war crimes” in Gaza, let them finish their analysis of everything since 911. Our whole world has been turned upside down and the UN continues to lack credibility in the eyes of all but the blind. So, it seems like Gaddafi has a point… and just because he’s not a Rhodes scholar or an Oxford graduate doesn’t mean he’s not speaking from the heart as a representative of his people. Sometimes the clothes do not make the man, and it is shameful for supposedly “civilised” European-types to dismiss a man’s contention because of his unpolished rough edges. It stinks of elitism, the same elitism that perpetuates the us vs them idiology that breeds fanatics on both sides.

    • Cos Seven says:

      04:16am | 03/10/09

      Whenever I see people dismissing a speaker for his attitude, appearance and other non-speech-content matters I know he has spoken that truth which they cant bear to hear. What truth is that? The truth that implicates them.

 

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