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Top tips for becoming a reality TV star

Emma Ashton

by Emma Ashton

06 Jan 05:55am

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Filed under: Australia S Got Talent, Big Brother, Entertainment, Masterchef, Reality Tv, Society, Television, The Amazing Race, The Biggest Loser, Wife Swap Australia

65 comments

Christmas is over, the hangover from New Years has receded and instead of having a New Years resolution of giving up smoking or losing weight, you have decided you want to be a reality TV star.

If you're a surfer dude, don't dress like an accountant. Picture: Kristi Miller

Whether it is to be famous, or just to have an interesting unique experience, here are some tips that will get you closer to hearing “lights, cameras, action”! Being sexy, humorous or able to cause conflict may help you get on the show, however, all shows need a diversity of people to make it interesting and to keep it real.

1. Decide which show you are best suited for.
If you can’t sing or dance forget the talent shows like The Voice, The X Factor or Australia’s Got Talent. If you can cook Masterchef Australia, and My Kitchen Rules are possibilities.

However there are shows where anyone can apply like The Amazing Race Australia, Wife Swap Australia, the new Big Brother, and you don’t even need to know how to cook to get on Come Dine With Me. Please note I don’t advocate putting on large amounts of weight to get a spot on The Biggest Loser.

2. Look out for casting calls.
Check out the official websites for the big shows, like Masterchef, Australia’s Got Talent, The Biggest Loser, and The Amazing Race. You may also see the call for applicants of these high rating shows in the mainstream media. In fact when Big Brother opens up for applications this will be front page news. I’m not joking.

Also keep an eye out on the Lifestyle Channel website, production house websites like Shine and Southern Star. Regularly check TV blogs like Reality Ravings, and TV Tonight for information, and look at casting agency Cast of Thousands Facebook page as they cast a lot of reality shows.

3. You’ve found the show. Now to get noticed: The Application.
All shows have different casting methods, but even to get to the first stage of cooking for Masterchef Australia you need to jump the written application hurdle first.

Some tips to make your application standout:
* Be honest: Nothing will peeve a network more if they are going through the casting process and then towards the end they find out that you don’t have that Masters in Astrology.
* Be authentic: Reality TV is about real people and they want to read who the real you is, so don’t make up a whole different persona, people that are ordinary/normal do make it on these shows.
* Backup what you are saying with examples: If you say you are funny make sure your application is humourous. If you say you are outrageous, outline why you are.
* Have a good back story: Sometimes it is just not about your talent. A difficult childhood, an interesting upbringing or obstacles you have overcome will help you connect with the audience and feed the publicity machine. Remember So You Think You Can Dance Season 2 where all the dancers at the auditions had some story to go along with their 30 second dance.
* Don’t sound like you only want to be on the show to be famous: Talent shows are the exception to this, however if casting agents get a whiff that you are going on Big Brother to promote your new business or book idea, chances are your application will be in the shredder.
* Get your message across succinctly: With thousands of applications submitted, if yours is longwinded chances are they will get bored and bin it. Make sure it is short, sharp and punchy.

If a video application is required avoid a long musical introduction or scenic shots, they don’t care about your cinematography skills, they want to see you and what you are like. This also means don’t be shy to shoot it where you live or work. Unless you are a nudist, stay clothed.

4. Your application grabbed them. Now they want to see you
You razzled them with your application and now they want to meet you, which means you are one step closer to getting your face on camera. Here’s what you should do:
* Wear something that shows who you are: if you are surfer dude it is no use turning up dressed in a preppy shirt and slacks. Do make sure you are presentable. Looking like a slob in most cases won’t be attractive.
* Be authentic and don’t censor yourself: Be open and honest about your personal life, your values and views. Also be open about your flaws – believe it or not, having a phobia of taxi drivers might get you that gig on The Amazing Race.
* Try and be memorable: This does not mean you need to be loud and outrageous but make sure your answers have something that hooks the casting agent and producer in. If you are telling a sad story, tears in the eyes is always a positive thing. A good example of this is Masterchef Australia season 1,2 and 3.

After this process if they like you they may investigate you further, and Google is their friend, particularly if you have an unusual name. So have a look over all your social media accounts to ensure there is not something there that might turn them off, or conversely it may make you even make you more attractive as a contestant.

Generally any racist, sexist or homophobic comments may not be seen as a positive thing. However as usual there are exceptions to this rule. Big Brother may consider casting a racist guy with some culturally diverse contestants to be provocative.

If you get on a reality show, embrace the challenges, both physical and emotional, you will experience. And who knows you just might get more then your allotted five minutes of fame.

Emma Ashton is a reality TV consultant and blogger who helps people make their reality TV dream come true.

Most commented

65 comments

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    • Nudest Dude says:

      08:02pm | 08/01/12

      Are people serious? Why are people knocking a person advising people on how to get on TV? Great article. I’m not too proud to admit I’d love to be on TV or radio and be able to express my thoughts and opinions to the country, being as opinionated as I am. Of course, if I ever became a part of that ugly monster called z-grade fame, I would last all of five seconds as soon as my nudie pics surface online to discredit me. Alas, my moment shall never be.  So it’s back to the camera in the nude for me. ;(

      Reply

    • Samantha says:

      04:31pm | 06/01/12

      @Cynicised, you’ve raised some pretty interesting points here.  I never watched her on Idol so I mercifully did not have to listen to her destroy a song that is one of my favourite songs of the old-school era.  I like Mitchell’s style of music, although I admit to not having listened to the album, only what was played on the J’s.  You are right though, she certainly was not suited to the Idol format and it would have been an insult to try to mould her in that way.

      I generally listen to most things too, if it’s good, and I’ll admit to having my moments of pop music, but interestingly enough, it’s usually once they have been swept up in the tide of newer pop music and forgotten that I’ll actually listen to them (case in point old-school Britney, Kylie, etc).  It’s sad that there are some really awesome talents who feel that talent shows are the way to get anywhere in the music industry, because in their own environment, they might have been very different.

      I wonder if we had Red Faces as a show in its own right, how popular would it be?  Winner takes a grand, runner up gets 500 dollars, every week.  After that, we don’t hear from them again.  Do you reckon people would tune in? At least in the old days when Red Faces was on, there was no push to be streamlined into one musical/talent category.  People could be themselves, often with hilarious results, either intended or not.

      Reply

    • Cynicised says:

      07:31pm | 06/01/12

      No a bad idea, Samantha! I might watch, as long as it was short and sweet.
      Of course, I’m keeping my potentially multi-million- dollar -making talent show pitch to myself right now, since we currently seem to have a glut.
      Watch this space!  Hehe! wink

    • Az says:

      02:54pm | 06/01/12

      I read a hilariously well written article in the Guardian some time ago that I think sums this TV Genre up perfectly.

      My favorite quote from this article -

      The X Factor was essentially the musical equivalent of a giant effluent truck with its nozzle attached to the charts, its pump set to “expel” and Cowell cackling dementedly in the cabin, while waving a vast wodge of banknotes with one hand and making the “wanker” sign at everyone who passes by with the other.

      Here - worth a read http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/lostinshowbiz/2011/mar/10/elton-john-versus-simon-cowell

      Reply

    • Samantha says:

      02:44pm | 06/01/12

      Emma,

      I give you the utmost respect for actually responding to all posts that are on here.  Clearly, you’re the one laughing all the way to the bank in the end, if you have convinced people to part with their cash in a way that makes money for you and to make them feel better about themselves.  I don’t agree with the whole ‘Reality TV’ thing that seems to attract so many others, but there is clearly a market out there for it, even if I deplore the state of Australian television.

      I do wish to make one small thing clear however - Lisa Mitchell may have appeared on Australian Idol but it was Triple J that actually exposed her music properly. I guarantee that not one of those lovers of mainstream music, the ones that typify the viewers of such Reality TV programmes as Australian Idol, Australia’s Got Talent, etc, would even know what her songs were, let alone realise that she is still very much in the music game.

      Guy Sebastian struggled for years to have a career.  It was Shannon Noll who had the success at the time, but now he has drifted from the limelight.  I’ve never heard of Christina Parie and I doubt that Reese Mastin will be around in ten years’ time.  Rob Mills is another that needed a career post singing since his music one flopped, so he was engaged in what is going to be yet another music format show (because we clearly don’t have enough of them on the telly).

      You say that we have exposed so many great talents but the thing is, people like seeing people for a bit and then they tune out to see what the next big thing is.  By the time the shows end, people are usually sick and tired of hearing that person because they have been in our face for weeks.  I don’t even watch these shows and they are still thrust in my face because I happen to turn the television on daily.

      I ask you one thing though.  Please do not compare us to the US.  We don’t want to be the US and we have so much more talent to give to people than this sort of thing daily.  Sadly, as mentioned above, there is a market and that is all that is important these days.

      As a result, I think I’ll stick with my community radio, documentaries and arthouse films, thanks.

      Reply

    • Cynicised says:

      03:43pm | 06/01/12

      ” I guarantee that not one of those lovers of mainstream music, the ones that typify the viewers of such Reality TV programmes as Australian Idol, Australia’s Got Talent, etc, would even know what her songs were, let alone realise that she is still very much in the music game.”
       I’ll take that bet, Samantha!  “Wonder” is a fine album.I hear Lisa has a new original album due for release next year. She was definitely not suited for the Idol format, totally destroying many of the covers she attempted. I’ll never forget her treatment of Blondie’s “Heart Of Glass” and the jeers it produced he! However, it is pleasing to see that she is still around. I’ll be interested to see if her new album is as good as her previous and if her ingenue style remains popular.

      Reality show exposure has certainly helped a very few talented artists gain a foothold, however, the realities of these shows and the music biz today mean that only the tenacious have any longevity.

      Oh and I listen to anything, as long as it’s good, no matter where it originates. That’s why I used to watch shows like Idol, to find the rare gems and mercilessly deconstruct the hopeless!  However, talent shows are the only variety of Reality Show that have even a smidgin of merit. The rest are insults to intelligence and pure voyeurism.

    • scumbag says:

      03:03pm | 06/01/12

      I’m never going to get anywhere in reality TV, I’m overweight for a start, not even a contender for The Biggest Loser in Iceland. Would like to get back to normal weight. I was 8lb 4ozs once.

    • Ace Leo Ace says:

      02:06pm | 06/01/12

      Emma, as a long term foot soldier in the lower echelons of the TV industry both here in Australia and in the spiritual home of reality tv (London) I can say that this is actually realistic, sound advice.

      I work on auditions for these shows year round and have witnessed the best and worst performances.

      So many people put all their hope and ambition into an audition, yet come completely unprepared, for example singers turn up having only memorised one song and if the producer likes them, wants to hear more, they choke and can’t think of any other song they can sing. Its bizarre but it happens.

      Also I think the offensive loudmouth is out of vogue, producers are looking for genuine laconic characters that an audience can connect with, too many people go for controversy to stand out and its a very risky technique.

      in short its like you said, be prepared, be yourself and have a heart (story).

      To all the commentors knocking Emma, believe me, I see the same faces turn up to auditions year after year. Reality show wannabes are real. These people are out there. They probably need some advice.

      Reply

    • Emma Ashton says:

      01:31pm | 06/01/12

      SimonofLakemba - let me have some fun….

      Cynicised - Sheesh you make me sound like Kim Jong-il’s media advisor. If people want to use my services they can. BTW a mathematician does not provide a service a consultant does.

      Wynston Cruso - Obviously there is a range of talent that goes on these shows, but also there have been some great discoveries look at Lisa Mitchell, Guy Sebastian,  Christina Parie and Reece Mastin to name a few. Wes Carr who was sick of gigging around pubs finally managed to gain some traction by going on a show like this. And every talented but not fitting into the record company mould must be auditioning for The Voice. Where the judges have to pick their singers purely on The Voice. Ok it is a gimmick but an interesting one.

      Reply

    • Cynicised says:

      04:39pm | 06/01/12

      Wynston, in some cases you are quite wrong. Very, very rarely they DO have talent which just has not been discovered. A&R guys don’t do the rounds of pubs and clubs like they used to looking for talent to sign, so a shot via a reality show can make sense, IF you can actually sing or dance, as Emma advises.  However, the ability to write a a good original song is usually not what the producers are looking for, sadly, as has been pointed out in this thread, although Damien Leith (who won in Lisa’s year)  can. He has a mostly original album due for release this year as well. I only hope his record company gives it as much exposure as they do his all-covers albums - he deserves that much for making them a heap of money last year.
      However,YouTube and the Net, even mySpace are the alternative place for musos to get exposure these days. One hopes that soon the biz will catch up with the technology and allow artists to control their own sales via legal downloads, yet manage to still reach a wide audience.

    • Wynston Cruso says:

      03:12pm | 06/01/12

      Lisa Mitchell didn’t win right? And I’m pretty sure her success is in spite of, not because of, the talent show she went on. Guy Sebastian is a joke. I agree with the voice idea being a gimmick, but at least, as you state, they’re going by the persons actual voice. But a good singing voice alone doesn’t constitute talent, and the reason why these people are on these shows is because they can’t write songs of their own, because…... they have no actual talent.

      I guess my point is, if they actually were that good, they wouldn’t be on these shows to begin with, they’d be writing their own music and doing the hard work to get produced etc, like the real artists out there, of which there are many, and sadly these douches on ‘talent’ shows often overshadow our real talent. Just my opinion, but I honestly would not consider anyone to have ever won a ‘talent’ show to be remotely talented. In short, talent shows in general are a gimick in and of themselves.

      Massive props for responding to people also, high five smile

    • Cynicised says:

      02:14pm | 06/01/12

      Emma. You’re the one comparing yourself to the spin doctor of an evil dictator, not me! Haha! 

      And look what happened to Wes Carr. He was  gigging around Sydney pubs until a certain corporation got hold of him via Idol. In the end he couldn’t reconcile his desire to write his own music at his own pace with the demands of the record company. Last heard from, he was going “indie”, after having his rep  tarnished by a cynical brush with commercial  ambition.

      The Voice IS a a massive gimmick and the winner will be manipulated  and discarded at will  by the record companiy like every other poor sap  before him/her.

    • Wynston Cruso says:

      12:38pm | 06/01/12

      I noticed a typo in your article. I believe you meant:

      “If you can’t sing or dance then definately apply for the talent (<—-I found this cute) shows like The Voice, The X Factor or Australia’s Got Talent.”

      It was my understanding that people go on these shows for exactly the opposite reasons you list, in that they are completely talentless. If they had any, wouldn’t they be doing something with said talent instead of going straight for the sell out option on a crappy tv show filled with other talentless hacks? People go on these shows because they’re attention seeking dickheads, your list could have consisted of just this: 1 - Be a dickhead. 2 - ??. 3 - Profit.

      Reply

    • Cynicised says:

      12:24pm | 06/01/12

      I suppose you tell yourself you are providing a service, Emma, and that’s how you sleep at night. However, methinks the lady doth protest too much. You seem to feel the need to justify your occupation whilst spruikong your “consultancy” ie how to help the gullible part with their hard -earned to attempt to make an even bigger dick of themselves on reality television.
      At least you recognize that talent is required to gain anything from talent shows, one point in your favor.

      In short: ” A mathematician starts with a problem and creates a solution. A consultant starts by offering a solution and creates a problem”. Nassim Nicolas Taleb.

      Reply

    • Sid James says:

      12:23pm | 06/01/12

      I thought excessive cleavage was the reality door opener, but no complaints here as I always enjoy a picturesque view of silicon valley

      Reply

    • Charlton Heston says:

      12:16pm | 06/01/12

      You Damn Maniacs ....you really did it this tijme

      Reply

    • Magwitch says:

      12:14pm | 06/01/12

      If you are talking AGT, Idol the main criteria is not to have any original talent . The producers want clones of the more famous (as do the associated record companies who have a big say) and ditto the viewer demographic who don’t watch to be too challenged and require performances to feel like a pair of comfy slippers. The performances are edited (and I use the term loosely) to fit in with more important issues such as ad breaks, comperes who love to hog the limelight and of course the so called judges. Better to just go straight to YouTube and bypass all the hassle!

      Reply

    • Cynicised says:

      01:21pm | 06/01/12

      Agreed in principle, Magwitch. ORIGINAL talent is not valued by the recording corporations, even if the contestant manages to win by showcasing enormous like- ability and versatility with covers.Case in point -Damien Leith. His recent originals album, Remember June, whilst well -received by the critics, was not backed nor barely promoted by his record company. They loved his follow-up covers of Roy Orbison though, as did many of his Idol fans, who bought it by the truckload whilst they largely ignored his originals. Sad.

    • Emma Ashton says:

      12:07pm | 06/01/12

      St. Michael - I am assuming you are being ironic with your handle. However you have piqued my curiousity what type of society would you like our society to be?

      Reply

    • Emma Ashton says:

      12:07pm | 06/01/12

      St. Michael - I am assuming you are being ironic with your handle. However you have piqued my curiousity what type of society would you like our society to be?

      Reply

    • St. Michael says:

      01:15pm | 06/01/12

      Looks like the Hunch is chewing on my posts again, so just in case the first response didn’t get through:

      The type of society I’d like ours to be would be one where considerable public notoriety is accorded to people other than people ranging from randoms who’ve managed to overcome their (by definition self-imposed) obesity crises through to precocious, Tiger-parented kids who’ve learned how to broil an obscure avian species with the intent of eating it.  And that’s before you go anywhere near the public notoriety and money spent on just sitting and watching a dozen or so random Australian idiots in a house for three months.

      That would, of course, be a society that would not support the small business venture you’ve rather effectively advertised here.

    • St. Michael says:

      12:41pm | 06/01/12

      The type of society that awards notoriety to people achieving something more than successfully cooking obscure recipes at the earliest possible age or overcoming their own self-imposed obesity crises.  Or, most egregiously, doing nothing but sitting around and living in a fishbowl for three months or so.

    • St. Michael says:

      11:50am | 06/01/12

      This is possibly the most depressing article I’ve ever read on the Hunch.

      I can’t yet decide what makes it more depressing: what it says about our society, or the fact it was written in earnest.

      Reply

    • St. Michael says:

      01:09pm | 06/01/12

      @ AdamC: I don’t mention starving children because it’s a “Won’t Someone Think Of The Children” argument, and it’s a pretty poor line to take.

      But I still do regard it as depressing.  Reality TV’s a pox on society, as is the industry that supports it.

    • AdamC says:

      12:37pm | 06/01/12

      Oh, stop taking yourself so seriously, St Michael. I’m surprised you didn’t mention the starving children!

    • AdamC says:

      12:37pm | 06/01/12

      Oh, stop taking yourself so seriously, St Michael. I’m surprised you didn’t mention the starving children!

    • Emma Ashton says:

      11:05am | 06/01/12

      S.L - TV shows regardless of the genre want to know interesting things about the contestants so they can either talk to them about it on the show or use it as publicity to promote the contestants and the show.

      Chuck - All due respect to your point, however when they cast on that basis for Big Brother in the latter seasons the ratings plummeted. Also I think you will find the majority of the contestants on Masterchef have tertiary qualifications. Season 2 was noted as being year of the lawyer.

      Ronny Jonny - That is a big call….. Go check out my blog I think you will find the commenters and I have a great time taking the piss or being slightly snarky about reality TV shows.

      Having said that I am one of the genres biggest fans.

      Annelies - Survivor is one of my favourites as well. Unfortunately it is such a huge, expensive production it would be difficult for Australia to do it well. An option which I don’t know is feasible would be to hire the set from the US version of the show after they have completed filming there seasons there. Imagine the 1000’s that would apply to be on the show.
      The Celebrity Australian Survivor was shocking. We don’t need to see a repeat of THAT.

      KMT - Unfortunately I could not mention all reality TV shows. But definitely opportunities for “pretty” girls and “geeky” guys. I understand for the guys it is a very positive filming experience.

      Dancan - Reality TV covers a huge spectrum of shows. Don’t forget Back To Where You Came From was reality TV and had a positive effect on transforming peoples views on refugees.

      Economist - Thanks - great TV concept.

      AdamC - In fact I am the only reality TV consultant in Australia and I only launched my business three months ago. Why? Well I have watched, written and blogged on reality TV for four years, and constantly I was being asked for assistance or advice so I figured there is a market there. If you look at my what consultancy (http://www.realityravings.com/about/)  it does more then just helping with reality TV applications. Reality TV is huge here and the reality TV industry in the US is even bigger.

      BTW to get to even cook for producers and casting agents on Masterchef you have to fill out a written applicants.

      SimonfromLakemba - cMasterchef has turned chefs into rock stars! Since Masterchef and the meteoric rise of Matt Preston there have been people clamouring to get on reality shows that would have been adverse to them previously.

      Brizben - point taken.

      Shane - The points made were serious with some tongue in cheek humour thrown in.  Thousands of Australian’s apply for reality shows each year. I hope this article helps people who would like to get on a show.

      James - I beg to differ. Reality TV has been at the forefront of showcasing people of different cultures on our screens with mainstream dramas following. Would Guy Sebastian or Casey Donovan even been able to get an interview with a record label with out the help of Australian Idol. Julie Goodwin has transformed her life by winning Masterchef. She has shown that a older not thin women with a modicum of wit can have a media career. Snap for Chrisse Swan.

      Reply

    • Craig says:

      08:11am | 08/01/12

      Oh Emma, you let yourself down….....the best thing you could’ve done was shut up and don’t say anything, instead you tried to defend yourself, shame really.  You work in media Emma,  don’t like what people have to say about your work and you feel this continual need to respond to other people’s critique, then you really need to think about the line of work you are in. Focus Emma stay focused.

    • Miles says:

      01:18pm | 06/01/12

      The whole fact that you coach ‘reality’ tv contestants is beyond ironic.  I didn’t think that ‘reality’ required any coaching…

    • SimonFromLakemba says:

      12:01pm | 06/01/12

      Lol wow, never had someone reply to everyone on the Punch before!

    • Economist says:

      11:49am | 06/01/12

      Geez Bella a bit harsh. Emma’s more like an image consultant and far better looking the Max Markson. $275 is probably quite reasonable. I don’t know the rates.

    • Emma Ashton says:

      11:41am | 06/01/12

      Bella Starkey - It is not about making up a story it is about shaping it into a succinct form. People pay professionals to razzle their CV’s and all the information on their is true it just makes their abilities pop out to potential employers. However once they get to the interview process it really is up to them.
      If you are not a fan of reality TV you are not going to get my blog. BTW a recent article that may interest you if you are a feminist you might like this blog post on Planet Cake - Paris Cutler If She Was Guy would She Be Deemed To Be More Likeable? http://www.realityravings.com/2011/12/01/planet-cake-paris-cutler-were-a-guy-would-she-be-more-likeable/

    • Emma Ashton says:

      11:41am | 06/01/12

      Bella Starkey - It is not about making up a story it is about shaping it into a succinct form. People pay professionals to razzle their CV’s and all the information on their is true it just makes their abilities pop out to potential employers. However once they get to the interview process it really is up to them.
      If you are not a fan of reality TV you are not going to get my blog. BTW a recent article that may interest you if you are a feminist you might like this blog post on Planet Cake - Paris Cutler If She Was Guy would She Be Deemed To Be More Likeable? http://www.realityravings.com/2011/12/01/planet-cake-paris-cutler-were-a-guy-would-she-be-more-likeable/

    • bella starkey says:

      11:27am | 06/01/12

      So you charge people 275 dollars to fill out their application forms in order for them to seem more “authentic” to the producers.

      I had a look at your site, you don’t seem to be a great analyst of reality tv as much as a gossip aggregator. If you can trick someone into paying you that much cash to fill out an application form, well people pay a fortune to homeopaths and psychics, don’t they?

    • FT says:

      10:51am | 06/01/12

      Those criticising the article obviously fail to realise there are people out there that really believe their one ticket to fame / fortune / happiness is through reality TV. Sad but true. Who is Emma Ashton not to assist in this process?

      Reply

    • Rose says:

      06:37pm | 06/01/12

      There are also those that made it work for them, Ryan Fitzgerald, Chrissie Swan, Guy Sebastian etc, all turned their 15 minutes of fame into a real career, and they are now paid far better than most of the rest of us!!

    • David says:

      10:42am | 06/01/12

      I thought a career was something that lasted for more than a television season. How does anybody call 15 minutes of fame a “career”?

      Reply

    • James says:

      09:53am | 06/01/12

      The formatting in the article is off, and some of your guidelines are missing.  For completness, here they are:

      If you have a brain, remove it.
      If you have a shred of decency, supress it.
      If you can formulate rational opinions, forget it.

      Reply

    • Az says:

      09:44am | 06/01/12

      “If you can’t sing or dance forget the talent shows like The Voice, The X Factor or Australia’s Got Talent”


      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

      Reply

    • Shane says:

      09:06am | 06/01/12

      was this article serious, being ironic in a weird kind of way, or simply straight out taking the piss and i missed the point?

      the only tip i can give anyone applying for a reality show, before the audition drink 3 litres of strong red cordial and 10 black strong coffees. you’ll sit their wide eyed, hyped up and maybe even wee yourself a little bit.

      then, you should be a shoe-in.

      Reply

    • Brizben says:

      09:05am | 06/01/12

      “If you can’t sing or dance forget the talent shows like ...”

      Has anyone heard the horrible ads for YTT? I think the producers are tone deaf.

      Reply

    • RED says:

      08:56am | 06/01/12

      O wow, this article was actually serious.
      Moving right along then.

      Reply

    • Economist says:

      08:43am | 06/01/12

      Emma ignore the knockers. I liked this piece. I’d love to see “Punch Big Brother”. Lock 15 punchers in a house for 3 months to throw their opinions around.  I reckon they’d be more civil in person.

      Reply

    • dancan says:

      01:00pm | 06/01/12

      god could you imagine Erick and Acotrel in the BB house

    • Economist says:

      11:46am | 06/01/12

      Econopisst I wish I’d chose this as my pseudonym grin

      Cmon there are plenty of wankers from allsides, Hell many would label me one.

    • AdamC says:

      10:25am | 06/01/12

      I agree re MasterChef. I you really, really wanted to cook for a living, you would become an apprentice chef.

    • Economist says:

      10:20am | 06/01/12

      AdamC certainly wasn’t a dig at you mate, you know I love ya grin And heh I’ve had the occasional spat so can’t talk. But Ten’s version of BB was all about shock and sex. Nine may do a better job and I’d prefer to see some interesting discussions than titilation.

    • econopisst says:

      09:41am | 06/01/12

      Why on earth would anyone want to be locked up with right wing wankers for three months?

      2 groups enter, only one survives. Game over in less than a week.

    • SimonFromLakemba says:

      09:36am | 06/01/12

      AdamC

      Casey Donovan found that out the hard way, she won Australian Idol and then they dumped her!

      Masterchef is a beauty though ( I do watch it ) they have always had a dream to cook, but couldn’t be bothered starting from the ground up so ill go on a TV show instead. I think the only reason the big name chefs go on it is to promote themselves, Id think they would be pretty peeved that some upstarts can come along and all of a sudden think they are ‘Chefs’

      @Economist

      Everyone is tough behind a keyboard, didn’t you know that?

    • dancan says:

      09:34am | 06/01/12

      @AdamC - Reality TV has nothing to do with success for the contestant, show producers will have contestants jump through any number and style of hoops to make “good” TV while dangling that carrot of “famous”

    • AdamC says:

      09:12am | 06/01/12

      I like to think I am relatively civil online, Economist - at least to most commenters!

      The strangest aspect of this article was the occupation of the author. Up to now, I was totally unaware that ‘reality TV consultants’ existed to help make my ‘reality TV dreams come true’. But, not to knock the profession, but wouldn’t it be a problem for reality TV consultants that newer reality TV formats are, well, somewhat talent-driven?

      While X Factor, MasterChef, Project Runway, Next Top Model et al are still all about hype and drama, one’s stardom-seeking clients at least need some basic skills - in Top Model’s case, assuming you regard being attractive, skinny and able to walk in a straight line as ‘skills’  - to get their foot in the door. Is it a case of, “I can sort of cook, therefore I should try MasterChef and hope for the best”?

      Speaking of ability, I was quite impressed by X Factor winner Reece Mastin. (I found myself watching the finale, but hadn’t followed the series.) So what do they do to a potentially exciting new talent? They give him a terrible song to sing, of course, which appears to rhyme ‘yo’, ‘whoa’ and ‘oh’ in the chorus! Reality TV seems better at destroying potential success than facilitating it.

    • dancan says:

      08:43am | 06/01/12

      I can’t believe anyone would seriously encourage people to take part in the disgusting bile that is reality TV

      Idiocracy here we come

      Reply

    • KMT says:

      08:42am | 06/01/12

      What about Beauty and the Geek?

      Reply

    • Economist says:

      10:22am | 06/01/12

      Agreed, the best reality show. Though it’s heavily scripted, particularly if you’ve seen the US version when some of the same jokes turn up.

    • C1 says:

      08:25am | 06/01/12

      A friend of mine’s sister in law was a talent spotter ( I use the term loosly) for the Jerry Springer Show. She would handle the applicants, get them from Poontang Idaho to Chicago and throw them in the Bear Pit for their 15 minutes of fame (less commercial breaks).

      She did it for 4 years and then quit citing that she had to get her humanity back.

      Sums up the whole reality TV thing.

      Reply

    • Annelies says:

      08:15am | 06/01/12

      I’m addicted to Survivor.
      Unfortunately you have to be an American to get on it.

      Reply

    • Kate says:

      01:00pm | 06/01/12

      My family and I are exactly the same. We’ve seen every season and whenever someone does something ridiculous or is terrible at strategy, we all go “we would be SO much better at this”. Unfortunately it will never happen.

    • ronny jonny says:

      07:30am | 06/01/12

      I was looking forward to a humorous piss take of these shows and the people that go on them. But you are serious! That is funny.
      You, Emma are a reality show booster, possibly a lower calling than real estate agent or used car salesman.

      Reply

    • Condor says:

      01:12pm | 06/01/12

      Must be what you do with a Bacheloro fArts degree and can’t get a real job.

      Also the grammatical fail in her bio “At less *then* [sic] half the cost” shows that there isn’t a great deal of depth or intelligence behind the scenes (excuse the pun).

    • DriveByHeckler says:

      11:22am | 06/01/12

      There are reality TV entrant consultants????
      I feel like Charlton Heston at the end of “Planet of the Apes” when he discovers the top of the Statue of Liberty in the sand, realises civilisation has destroyed itself and cries “...You Damn Maniacs…..”
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gb4eZ7Z5yk8

    • VVS says:

      10:31am | 06/01/12

      It is funny that she is actually serious. and thought the Punch, of all places, was somewhere that would be appreciative of such an article.

      Best part wasn’t even hers (I hope):

      “Emma Ashton is a reality TV consultant and blogger who helps people make their reality TV dream come true.”

      That sir, is champagne comedy right there!

    • Ron says:

      10:14am | 06/01/12

      I was the same - the author is serious??  HAHAHA

      It would have been MUCH more interesting as a piss-take story

    • chuck says:

      06:43am | 06/01/12

      Emma perhaps you could have listed other unique attributes like having an IQ < 100, being a narcissist, hedonist with a skin as thick as the proverbial.

      Reply

    • marley says:

      06:22am | 06/01/12

      The phrase “reality TV dream” says it all for me.  There’s about as much reality in these shows as there is in Grimm’s fairy tales.

      Reply

    • S.L says:

      05:46am | 06/01/12

      I’ve auditioned twice for Millionare Hot Seat. One pretense to successfully applying to any of these shows is you have to be an extroverted wanker! Ok Hot Seat isn’t reality TV but on the application it asks “do you know or have met anybody famous?”
      It’s a quizz show for god sake! Who gives a toss who you know or what you’ve done?
      A few years ago I was driving taxis and every second passenger would ask “have you seen taxi cab confessions?” OH BOY!!!!!!!!!

      Reply
 
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