The dirtier he is, the wilder we are about Harry
US Celebrity news website TMZ has a deliciously succinct three word poll today. It reads, quite simply: Harry. Awesome? Disgraceful?
After tens of thousands of reader responses, “Awesome” is winning by a ratio of around 70:30. This confirms something Australians have felt instinctively for some time, which is that the day of the stodgy royal is over. We don’t want beefeaters, we want beefy young blokes with lusty appetites.
The world has changed since the merest sighting of a begloved royal sent us into apoplexy. We still want them to reign over us, or some of us do, but we want them real. When Harry is done inspecting the royal guards and helping the victims of landmines, he’s perfectly entitled to have a nude romp in Las Vegas. In fact, many of us expect nothing less.
Didn’t most of us do that when we were single and in our twenties? Isn’t that exactly what the movie The Hangover was all about? Fact is, the more Harry steps out of line, the more he’s in line with our own expectations. The world loves him, and nobody moreso than us colonials down here in the Antipodes. Here’s why:
He served his country
And he did it with distinction until New Idea blew the caper. The truly shocking aspect of this episode is that it was the first true news story New Idea had ever run.
He’s apologised for his gaffes
He went to a party dressed as a Nazi and has used words like Raghead and “our little Paki friend”, none of which was particularly becoming of a young royal. But Harry does a good line in contrition, and besides all that…
He loved his Mum
Just like all good boys.
He’s an awesome brother
By all accounts he organised the world’s best buck’s night for his brother, than behaved impeccably at the wedding, being perhaps the only man in the world not to ogle the bride’s sister’s bottom.
As you do when you’re 27, whether at sporting competitions or elsewhere.
Then parties some more…
As much as he enjoyed the team pursuit at the Olympic velodrome, other forms of pursuit also interest the young prince.
Then parties yet more with increasingly cool people…
If you could hang out with Usain Bolt, you would too.
He actually inhaled
And he was just 17 at the time, but come on, it’s a rite of passage for all of us. At least he got off the stuff.
He supports serious causes
His work with wounded soldiers has earned him a humanitarian award.
He scratches his nuts in public
Admittedly this is hardly exemplary behaviour, but if our national cricket team has taught us anything, it’s that it’s OK to do in public. Apparently. There’s actually a famous photo of Harry adjusting the jewels at a polo match which we’re far too classy to show you. Instead, here’s a pic of the valiant prince atop a fine steed.
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