The dawning of the Age of Ridiculius

KH says:

06:45am | 17/01/11

And yet 2010 is the hottest year on record.  Weird kind of “cooling” isn’t it?

Warren says:

06:59am | 17/01/11

Wrong Eric. The US Government changed from using the expression “global warming” to “climate change” because “global warming” was too alarmist. The expression “climate change” was seen as more benign.

PaulB says:

08:51am | 17/01/11

I assume by “benign” you mean “saleable” Warren.  And KH Warmest year?  Well it depends how many remote weather monitoring stations you close down doesn’t it.

Rev says:

09:09am | 17/01/11

KH - how far do those records go back again?

mandas says:

09:34am | 17/01/11

That’s amazing!
So the IPCC (the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change), was formed when? Oh that’s right - 1988.
I guess it used be called the IPGW huh? Oh wait - no it didn’t.
Guess you must be just making stuff up.

Geoff - Brisbane says:

10:08am | 17/01/11

If man is causing climate change, then why does global warming champion Al Gore, live in a mansion which uses 7 times the power of a regular US family home?

Warren says:

10:28am | 17/01/11

@mandas - Climate scientists have been using the both the expressions “global warming” and “climate change” long before the IPCC was created. Try & keep up.

@Geoff - because he is a hypocrite.

ibast says:

10:33am | 17/01/11

Because it was becoming too hard to explain to simple people that average global warming equates to more extremes in climate conditions, not just hotter days.

Seth Brundle says:

11:21am | 17/01/11

“Climate Change” can be applied to both warming and cooling, which allows them to claim that pretty much anything other than complete climatic stability (which never occurs) will require new exorbitant taxes and further wealth transference.
Oh, and I also have recently switched from a scorpio to a libra.  Aren’t Libra a brand of tampons??  EWWWWE!

Warren says:

11:53am | 17/01/11

Curses @Seth you’ve discovered the truth! It’s a global conspiracy by the left to tax people more. I happen to be in collusion with the Governments of Europe, China and the US, all those pesky climate change scientists, insurance companies & those charlatans at the Securities and Exchange Commission who are advising firms on how to avoid climate-related risks. Now if I can find that scientist employed by Imperial Tobacco to “prove” no links exists between smoking and lung cancer I’ll be saved!

RT says:

12:59pm | 17/01/11

This part of the thread shows that there is no topic on The Punch that cannot be hijacked by the resident trolls pushing their tired, narrow agenda. Anything to say on the topic of astrology, people? Thought not.

Chase Stevens says:

01:44pm | 17/01/11

You lot can’t seriously be saying that Humans can pump whatever they like into the Atmosphere without it having any sort of effect on the Planet and Climate. No one can be that weird surely.

Sam Chowder says:

08:06pm | 25/01/11

Can we please address global warming after Melbourne gets a decent summer.

Jim says:

06:49am | 17/01/11

Not only is calendar spelt wrong, but look at the start and end dates. The start date of each sign is the same as the end date of the preceding sign…does that mean I have two signs now?

Mike says:

03:32pm | 17/01/11

“Honestly. If you folk can’t get something as easily checked as this right, what hope is there for any pieces on something that actually *matters* “

And not only that, they can’t correct it when someone tells them it’s wrong.

Hopeless.

Bobster says:

09:12am | 17/01/11

Almost, Nostie didn’t use it to attack Abbott but Eric managed to twist it into some weird proof that climate change is crap.

RT says:

01:04pm | 17/01/11

Apparently there is still enough interest in astrology that most major newspapers and many magazines carry an ‘in your stars’ section full of glib advice and fence-sitting forecasts.

We may be stardust, but that doesn’t mean we have to swallow the bulldust that is astrology.

baal says:

06:56am | 17/01/11

Pot calling kettle black.
In a world where people still worship a long since gone desert God it is not suprising people follow stars which actually exist.
I worship nothing but love.

Jason Todd says:

07:58am | 17/01/11

Ah TB, Thanks for giving me a chuckle first thing. Their view is equally as valid as yours. If they choose to believe in what you consider to be hokum, then they have every right to do so.

Is it crap? Probably. But whatever gets you through your day.

True Believer says:

08:15am | 17/01/11

@Baal:

Predictable comment. Well that is fine your perception of love is what you worship.  That is human love presumably as you have no higher belief, pretty fragile thing to worship, but if that is your god that is fine by me.

I will stick with the real God, for He is unconditional Love. Much better I can assure you, having been an unbeliever then thankfully realising there was so much more. 

The real God has gone nowhere I can assure you. :0)  Man has, in the futility of his mind,  been trying to deny Him since the Fall and so it will continue ad infinitum ad nauseum.  Ho hum…........................

PaulB says:

08:58am | 17/01/11

That’s nice True Believer.  Stick with your angry desert god originally adapted by the proto-Hebrews from another, earlier desert tribe, revised and modernized generation after generation by powerful and sometimes cruel interests (rather like a Volkswagen), but still basically the same angry desert god dreamt up by an ancient barely recalled tribe.  If it makes you happy…..

Rob r Charteris says:

09:01am | 17/01/11

True Believer says:08:15am; Really? when was the last time God told you he loved you and do you have a recording of it? or was it just a figment of your wild imagination which would be the actual reality. I see God was handing out unconditional Love to all the true believers in Queensland eh’
So what did the true believers do to deserve that?

Also how has God shown you his unconditional Love? examples please

I can give some pretty good evidence that God does not exist and all you need to do is look at all the atrocities that happen in every second of the day around the entire globe. but I guess that doesn’t matter because you think you are the chosen one.

Mick says:

10:06am | 17/01/11

@Rob r Charteris

“I can give some pretty good evidence that God does not exist”

Well go on then, make sure it’s relevant.  Stating an event that God could have prevented but didn’t is not proof.

Likes Joining Dots says:

10:27am | 17/01/11

I think the early adapters have jumped the gun here.

Wait a little longer. I hear iGod II is imminent - supposed to be awesome.

James1 says:

10:34am | 17/01/11

Indeed TB.  Your superstitions are far superior to those of others…

Rob r Charteris says:

11:28am | 17/01/11

Mick says:10:06am; that really is one of the most stupidest replies I think I have ever seen. Read the paper idiot there is a huge list. You obviously agree with me considering you lot think your imaginary friend controls what happens in the world and if it was the case then God is a very nasty piece of work.

Rob r Charteris says:

11:38am | 17/01/11

Mick says:10:06am; you answered a question with a question which is typical of a true believer. I would answer but God doesn’t exist so… point proven. Otherwaise God must enjoy seeing little kiddies being ripped from their mother’s arms to die a terrible death and the list goes on. Nice one God

Steph says:

11:40am | 17/01/11

TB, I agree with you. How the hell has anyone kept believing that the stars will guide their way in anything other than a navigational term?

It’s almost astonishing to see how many God-bashers there are here. Haven’t you got something better to do, or do you just like tearing up other people’s beliefs and ideals? Seriously, comment on the OP, not your own feelings on a God.

Jason Todd says:

12:01pm | 17/01/11

Sorry Steph, but such blatant hypocrisy on display amuses me.

Wasn’t bashing a particular god, was more tickled by the “Man, how can they believe (this absurd thing). Why don’t they see that they should believe this much more logical (second absurd thing)” thread that ran through TB’s reply.

Like I said, to each their own. I don’t place any particular stock in Astrology, besides having a chuckle over the stars in the morning paper, but I’m not going to lambast the people that like to believe it to feel a little better about themselves. Believe what you want. As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone, that is your right.

Mick says:

01:21pm | 17/01/11

@Rob r Charteris

No no Rob, You’ve made a statement now back it up or admit you are just jumping on a band wagon with no real convictions.

I’m sure you have turned many a blind eye to things, that does not mean you don’t exist.  Please, present me with your evidence and I will change my ways.

James1 says:

01:59pm | 17/01/11

Most of us aren’t bashing god Steph.  We are just pointing out that the superstitious among us should not laugh at the superstitions of others.  Seems a pretty fair point.

Tim the Toolman says:

02:27pm | 17/01/11

Hey, he said the “real God” everyone.  He’s clearly talking about Thor!  Or was it Ra…or perhaps Zeus.  I’m sure it’s the “real” one though!  Whichever that might be…

Brett says:

02:28pm | 17/01/11

@Rob r Charteris -  You haven’t been reading your bible if you think God runs this Earth and responsible for everything that goes on, or would stop every evil thing that goes on. This does not disprove God whatsoever. Whether someone believes in a God or not, your argument is moot when arguing against a Christian God. Not sure if you were arguing against a Hindu God, or Animist God though, you may have a point there. Is True Believer a Christian?

Rob r Charteris says:

03:39pm | 17/01/11

Mick says:01:21pm; What you want me to explain something to you, who believes in imaginary friends. Seems a bit pointless to me or any other sane person. Nothing I can say will convince you. Besides I already gave you an example you’re just not excepting it. So get off your righteous high horse and stop listen to those voices in your head because your argument is as flawed as the fraud you call God.

Rob r Charteris says:

03:57pm | 17/01/11

Brett says:02:28pm; God = any God it’s all a big fallacy. But I see the story being put forth seems to change as you see fit. When I was a young bloke 5-6 yrs they told me a Christian Sunday school I was forced to attend the all the peoples of the world were God’s children oh my how thing have changed. Did God have a say in that??? religion is so yesterday and becoming more and more irrelevant with every passing day and that is why you get all upset at people like me. Must be hard to see your system of belief or faith or whatever you want to call it being slowly broken down by science. A couple of examples…. the universe does not revolve around the earth. The Earth is not flat and no one has fallen off the edge. The earth wasn’t made only 12 000 years ago, man was never made from sand and along women didn’t come from some bloke’s rib. But suppose you believe this to be true, what does that say about you. And why haven’t you put proof of these events forward if it was true. I’ll tell you why it never happened in the first place. If you need an imaginary friend to guide you through life then you have more problem than you think. A lack of evidence after 2000 years I think says it all.

baal says:

05:28pm | 17/01/11

I am connected to divinity, it emcompasses me and I can not deny it. I believe. I however also know that I am a crazy person with no proof of my beliefs so keep them to myself, even now I am being deliberately vangue. I do not mock you for your beleif, but I mock you for your hubris.
I am a true believer and nothing can dent my faith, my faith is is mine and it is bond between me and the divine. I accept myself for being a faulty wonderfull quite possibly insane human.
If my lord wants someone else to be believe then my lord can do it for my lords self.
You are probally insane TB, rejoice in that freedoom. If your faith is as strong as mine who should not feel the need to mock others, I do not mock your faith, I mock you.
Also when we die we can see who choose the correct lord. I do not worship my lord, true gods do not need worship, they need nothing but rejoice in our love.
False insecure Gods demand tribute like the petty tyrants they are.

True Believer says:

05:30pm | 17/01/11

I am not even going to reply to all the mockers and scoffers. You say there is no God - you have no proof of His non-existence, I have plenty of knowledge of Him, but you cannot accept that.  I have been an unbeliever, I too scoffed at Christians, to my shame, over a long period since I turned away from the emptiness and futility of unbelief I have found life and that abundantly.  He is there and your protestations that he is not is just utter foolishness. Prove He is not there. It is not up to me to prove He is, you prove He is not. You cannot do it and you know it.  Grow up and realise all you think you know is not all there is.

I wish you all well.

Rob r Charteris says:

07:24pm | 17/01/11

True Believer says:05:30pm; You claim there is a god and you want non believers to prove it or his non existance. Now That Is FUNNY, thanks man I needed that. I guess that is the best you can do since you’re not allowed to burn me at the stake in this day an age.

Steph says:

07:54pm | 17/01/11

Brett, I think he is. From reading his previous posts on The Punch, anyway.

Steph says:

08:13pm | 17/01/11

Well, if we’re scoffing at gods, Let me have a good chuckle at Scientists. At least Christians have believed the same thing for thousands of years. Scientists just can’t get it right for longer than a minute. One day it’s this, the next it’s that. But every “Look! Science shows us this!” that’s broadcasted is taken as solid, pure fact. It must be right, it’s SCIENCE! And then the next week, or month, or year… someone comes along, proves a theory bulls***, and the scientists are tugging at their collars and coughing gently into their fists, and then one steps forward and says “That’s what we meant. Yes.” And the new theory is taken as fact.
So, let me get one scoff in there. My God has stayed the same. His Laws haven;t changed, He’s reliable to be right. And whole civilizations have worshipped him for thousands of years. Nowadays, those that say “I believe in Science” have listened to people (usually one person, backed up by others) for all of what? A century? Two? Or less - a decade in some cases. But those scientists are right. Until they get it wrong again.

baal says:

08:44pm | 17/01/11

steph,
If anyone ‘believes’ in science then they do not understand what science is. Science is the discovery of the world thru observation and then theories are formed based on observation and experiments.
I do not look to science for my faith yet I am grateful for the medicine it produces, the electricity that keeps my family warm and the skills and knowledge it has given me.
If you have real faith then nothing can shake it, however if your faith tries to make claims like curing cancer, fortelling the future, creating planets etc and you then spread these claims in a public forum do not be suprised if someone questions your faith claims.
Also nothing is immutable, not even the Gods or our rational laws.
Peace be with you.

Kael says:

09:28pm | 17/01/11

@baal 05:28pm: I don’t care how insane you may believe to be, but from my point of view you are one of the most sane in this discussion.

Your beliefs and faith are your own, it’s a very personal thing and trying to force your beliefs (or lack of them) upon another is at the very least rude and disrespectful. To put it into perspective with another personal choice, how many of you would take it very well if I tried insisting that a short, delicate woman was the only type of woman any of you should pursue and how silly it is of any of you for finding any other type of woman attractive?... Sure my comment doesn’t quite work against the females here, but I’m sure they can translate it with the point intact.

As for the actual article: I’m interested in the fallout from this, whether the majority will simply disregard it and work off the previous dates, or if we’ll start seeing 13 little clips in magazine and newspapers. Also I’m wondering if they have an actual time during the day one goes from one sign to another or if being born of the 17/12 now classifies me as both.

Rob r Charteris says:

09:37pm | 17/01/11

baal says:08:44pm; you hit the science nail right on the head.

Steph says:08:13pm; “Scientists just can’t get it right for longer than a minute. One day it’s this, the next it’s that”

Give us some examples of this. Science is based on the testing of evidence and the gaining of knowledge through testing and experimenting. The answers don’t change they are just become more formulated based testing the evidence. Unfortunately for you your beliefs are based on stories that just don’t stack up when tested in the same way. But in a primitive world 2000 years ago they were forced on you with hellfire and brimstone. Just because you stubbornly believe in imaginary friends does make them real or prove their existence. Religion was devised to do the very thing it has done to you and that is to control you. But hey I couldn’t care less what you believe in each to his own. Just don’t poke it out there as fact because it isn’t, far from it.

Rob r Charteris says:

10:04pm | 17/01/11

Steph says:08:13pm; Darwin wrote a book over 150 years ago “The Origin of Species” it’s has held up in every way to scientific scrutiny since, pity you can’t say the same about your God eh’ we would still be in the dark ages if we faced every hard question with and answer like “it was God” look what the vatican did Galileo they nearly put him to the stake for his findings… talk about paranoid of losing the control and power over people.
The biggest crime you lot commit is the manipulation of children and this should be stopped. It is on the same level and no different to those lunatics who strap explosives to children. It is straight out child abuse. And what about the sainthood of Mary MacKillop. It was no more than a PR stunt for a dying church who now has a former Nazi at its head. The thing they don’t want to tell you is how many people pray to this dead woman for a cure and died. It was an absolute joke.

Rob r Charteris says:

06:50am | 18/01/11

Kael says:09:28pm; “Your beliefs and faith are your own, it’s a very personal thing and trying to force your beliefs (or lack of them) upon another is at the very least rude and disrespectful.”

What a ridiculous come back based on fear. Baal is not forcing anything on to you, you paranoid imp. He/she is simply rejecting yours. It amazes me how easy you want to twist things around when your faith does stand up to scrutiny. I bet you’re also a snivelling Lib that like being fed crap through the media…. it must pain you to see you’re being governed by an Atheist…  hell if you believe in imaginary friends then you’ll believe anything you read or put in front of you.

True Believer says:

07:53am | 18/01/11

@Steph “It’s almost astonishing to see how many God-bashers there are here. “

Spot on Steph. I was interested in reading in the newspaper at the weekend an article about people blaming God about things that go wrong - research showed, it said, that atheists were the most angry at God. It seems to come about by something that has happened in their lives which is awful and which they cannot deal with other than blaming the God they do not believe in. So they lash out in anger at Him and at Christians. 

I feel sad they have had bad things happen, but you and I know it was not caused by God, but these folk have apparently been unable to deal with it short of turning on God whom they say does not exist.

Then they have the temerity to say Christians are being unrealistic. What a giggle eh.  Well by the flavour of many of the posts here I would say we have a lot of angry atheists.  Perhaps they should seek counselling for their unresolved issues instead of ranting on at their imaginary “god”. :0)

Kael says:

08:25am | 18/01/11

I’m sorry for the confusion. Only the first paragraph was directed at Baal and even that was intended to be a complement as s/he seems to be one of the few here who can have faith in what they believe in without trying to push it onto others or denouncing other’s beliefs.

Tripper Smurf says:

09:09am | 18/01/11

Organised relgion is organised for human purposes and is therefore corrupitble, biased and definitley not to be trusted.  While I do, as an agnost, have a sense of the ‘greater good’, ‘the universe’, or ‘god’ as you may wish to call it, I laugh at anyone who subscribes to one particular belief and then tries to say that everyone else’s belief is invalid as their belief is the only true one.

True Believer, if you say that your belief is the only true belief then you have lost your argument right there.  Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, Taoitsts, Animists…. all of these relgious ‘sects’ have equally valid testimony to the fact that their stories, rituals, holy books and traditions are correct.  It is more than likely that none are correct in the true sense of the word, and all have been corrupted by human nature over the years.

If you believe in a higher being, then that being should be one that speaks to you, whereever you are, no matter what you do. From my viewpoint, It cannot be found through a book, nor can you hear about it from a preacher, it only comes from within.  In this train of thought the Hindu belief that ‘You are God’ makes a heck of a lot sense.

As a agnost, Im fairly reguarly caught between those who feel their offically sanctioned gods are true, or those who believe there is no higher power at all.  However just as equally futile is trying to convince others that what you believe is correct and what others believe is not.

True Believer says:

11:22am | 18/01/11

@Tripper Smurf:

As an agnostic you are having a two way bet - sitting on the fence so to speak. People who sit on fences are seriously in danger of getting a splinter in their bottom. J

To answer your comment. I am not the slightest bit interested in religion organized by man. That is not my God. He is not religion and religion is not Him.  No one organizes Him. Yes, He does speak to those of His people prepared to listen so let us get that out of the way too. 

The rest of your comments are just your opinion which of course you are very much entitled to, but it holds no water, no more than that of any other person who chooses to reject the Living God.  It makes no difference to me what you think. I know what I know and that is unshakeable I can assure you.  It certainly makes no difference to my Lord although I am sure it saddens Him that you are missing out on the life Jesus died to bring you. But it is your God given choice to do so.

As for the religions you mention well you would have to argue that those people who subscribe to them. I cannot answer for their beliefs.  You may want to include the pantheists, Satanists, New Agers as well - there are heaps of man-organised religions out there.

I would suggest however, as one who has been an atheist there is no way those who subscribe to that doubt and emptiness have what I now have in Jesus. I would not swap it for the world. Give it a try, stop looking at what women/men do and using that as an excuse to deny God and go to Him through Jesus. If you do so with an honest heart I can assure you, you will not be turned away.

Jesus says, “Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hears my voice, and opens the door, I will come in to him.” 

Don’t just follow the unbelieving crowd - they are going nowhere - seek Him and you will find Him then your doubts will flee.

baal says:

12:03pm | 19/01/11

@True Believer,

You doth protest too much. I noticed you have not responded to me.
I am a person with true faith and as such I can be challeged, I can doubt, I can walk with believers and disbelievers alike with happiness, joy and love.
I never pity or put down those who do not have my faith becuase that is just mean and arrogant.
You true believer come across as insecure and you damage the reputation of those with real faith.
Remember the words of your mesiah about how blessed is the one that prayers in solitude than the preacher that stands on the corner seeking attention.
If you are connected to your God, good for you but do not attack those who are not connected to your little desert tyrant. ” if you bring your faith in the sun expect the followers of sol to prayer for fire”
you reap what you sow

Stu says:

12:22pm | 19/01/11

I’ve had this argument with True Believer before. It seems that in any thread about religion, she is compelled to seek proof or assert superstition in relation to every religion bar hers, while at the same time stating that she doesn’t have to provide evidence for her own beliefs. She cannot accept that this is a double standard.

James1 says:

10:08am | 20/01/11

“I am not even going to reply to all the mockers and scoffers. You say there is no astrology - you have no proof of its non-existence, I have plenty of knowledge of it, but you cannot accept that.  I have been an unbeliever, I too scoffed at astrologers, to my shame, over a long period since I turned away from the emptiness and futility of unbelief I have found life and that abundantly.  Astrology is there and your protestations that it is not is just utter foolishness. Prove it is not there. It is not up to me to prove it is, you prove it is not. You cannot do it and you know it.  Grow up and realise all you think you know is not all there is.

I wish you all well.”

See what I did there, True Believer?  See how ridiculous your original posts look now?  If the burden of proof is on the unbeliever, you prove to us that astrology is wrong and that you are right.

True Believer says:

05:44pm | 20/01/11

Amazing how when the unbeliever has no answer, no evidence they quickly run to the attack mode.  What can I tell people who are so absolutely sure they are right and Christians are wrong??  You listen but you do not hear, you look but you do not see. You are missing the best part even so and that is sad. I wish you well and urge you to keep seeking. One day I hope you will find.

Stu says:

09:00am | 21/01/11

@ True Believer:
“What can I tell people who are so absolutely sure they are right and Christians are wrong??” You expose your hypocrisy with this statement when you seek proof or assert superstition in relation to every religion or belief system bar your own (which you have done many times in this forum), while at the same time denying the need provide evidence for your own beliefs.

Chris L says:

11:44pm | 22/01/11

True Believer you have complained many times in the past about being ridiculed yet you started this comment thread by labeling another belief as “superstition” and “nonsense”. I don’t understand how you could say that with a straight face unless you are trolling. If you are trolling you have been very successful (certainly snagged me) and I congratulate you.

HappyCynic says:

11:12am | 17/01/11

The definition of a zodiac constellation is one that the sun rises through.  There have always been 13 zodiac constellations but for some reason Ophiuchus was dropped.  Western astrology came into our modern society from the Babylonians through to the Greeks who passed it on.

I share your scepticism of modern astrology but it isn’t fair to dismiss the history out of hand.  The earliest timekeepers were astrologers, calendars, the seasons, early navigation equipment, the whole field of astronomy, large swathes of mathematics and more all owe their definitions and beginnings to astrology and astrologers.

Not everything has to be reality based in life… is your life really that unimaginative?  If so, how joyless.  I wouldn’t use these things to justify my actions but I can enjoy the stories and the history.

notSue says:

12:11pm | 17/01/11

Happy Cynic, you rock!

Steph says:

08:52am | 17/01/11

Wait - what would that make my son? born on 4/12/09

St. Michael says:

12:26pm | 17/01/11

Why 2009? What was significant about that year?

Did the Global Financial Crisis cause a reduction in Scorpio’s hours and the hiring of Ophiuchus as a casual?

No wait—it’s that bloody Large Hadron Collider stuffing up the universe again.  No spontaneous singularities, just another astrological sign.

TChong says:

08:05am | 17/01/11

The earth moved for you, 1 morning , 10 years ago ?
Long time between innings Reg.  :(
But, who knows? maybe with a bit more practice, you can prove it was more than just a ‘one of”, and do it again.
( How about posting the event on YouTube, so we can all be amazed with another of your earth moving moments) ? 

Davida says:

09:18am | 17/01/11

“I also have this strange propensity to impregnate my women in August but I’m still trying to solve that one.”

Reg, perhaps that too is in the hands of the cosmos.  The winter solstice sees you rest longer, at a decreased temperature, leaving you ready to fire up come August….......

A Bob says:

07:59am | 17/01/11

Theologians for bringing philosophy into disrepute?

Jason Todd says:

08:02am | 17/01/11

Chiropractors who claim that manipulating a child’s spine can cure asthma, social awkwardness, ADHD and any other problems.

Please people. Don’t let quacks crack your childrens bones.

Naturopaths who claim that eating fistfuls of goji berries and washing it down with aloe vera juice can cure afflictions which are better managed with medication.

Bec says:

08:17am | 17/01/11

Yep. Chiropractors, people who push chelation for anything but genuine heavy metal poisoning, anti-vaccination kooks, and nutritionists. All wasteful kooks.

Grumpy says:

08:49am | 17/01/11

Psychologists and general practitioners.

Grumpy says:

08:50am | 17/01/11

Christians.

Elphaba says:

10:54am | 17/01/11

Power Balance bracelet wearers.

Seano says:

11:40am | 17/01/11

Chiropractors is a particularly good one.

The ACCC got the powerband people thankfully.

Elphaba says:

12:05pm | 17/01/11

I can’t believe chiropracters think they can cure ADHD.  My brother gets his back cracked but he’s a butcher lifting carcasses that weigh as much as him most days of the week. But then again, he’s an adult.

But back cracking on kids?  That’s just bad…

RT says:

01:06pm | 17/01/11

Well, surely the psychics and astrologers will see it coming and get themselves to a safe place.

bec says:

01:14pm | 17/01/11

Chiropractic manipulations cause strokes. Pretty frightening stuff.

http://quackwatch.org/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/chirostroke.html

Love hearing orthopaedic surgeons get riled up on the subject. Chiropractors and osteopaths are pretty much the banes of their existence.

Seano says:

02:50pm | 17/01/11

The whole field of alternative medicine should be much more heavily scrutinised and regulated.

Psychics and astrologers should have to display disclaimers like “for entertainment purposes only” and be limited in what they can charge for their “services”.

Anyone caught preying on people’s grief and loss of past loved ones, claiming to be able to talk to departed relatives without scientifically verifiable proof should be summarily executed so they can do it in person and report back later.

Seano says:

02:51pm | 17/01/11

Bec I’m surprised the government lets them have as much free reign as they do considering the potential for damage.

PS. Acupunturists should be against the wall too, no better than placebo.

bec says:

03:31pm | 17/01/11

Oh, definitely, Seano. It’s woo. It’s unsupported, manipulative woo that seeks out the most vulnerable in our communities and sells them the lie that they’re sick when they’re well, or that they will become well when they’re hopelessly sick.

The most frustrating thing is countering all these outrageous claims from friends who are addicted to these treatments with solid fact, and they come back with “well, it worked for me”. FFS. Of *course* a bloody sugar pill will have a placebo affect on someone who is on the road to recovery from a mild condition anyway!

You’ll love one of my favourite stand-ups, Dara O’Briain. This routine is pretty much the best thing of all time:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMvMb90hem8

bella starkey says:

03:51pm | 17/01/11

Chiropractors are such scumbags. Besides the whole curing asthma bullshit they can cause some serious long term damage. People are ignorant and think they are doctors (same with osteopaths) they are night school massage therepists with fancy offices.

I know people who have gone to see them for serious issues (back injury/hip injury) and when you say something along the lines of “hey you know these people arent real doctors, have you though of seeing an othorpedic specialist?” they get so defensive.

I have also heard some horror stories about punctured lungs/damaged nerves from acupunturists

fairsfair says:

04:37pm | 17/01/11

On a side note. My father has seen marked improvement in his fine motor skills (following severe stroke) since having regular acupuncture sessons and consulting a chinese herbalist. This is after the western trained physiotherapist told him to go home, he was as good as he’d ever get. His acupuncturists tells him that if he had consulted him immediately he would be cured, and looking at the improvement in a short space of time I think that may actually have been likely.

While I certainly agree that it can be taken too far sometimes - I think Chinese Medical Practitioners have their merits in particular contexts. It is all down to personal experience though I suppose. What kind of cowboy needleman would puncture a lung with one of thost tiny blunt things, that is amazing bella!  I have been to a chyro once - felt worse leaving than entering - so I will never go back. I know people who go routinely though - I just don’t understand.

Seano says:

07:19pm | 17/01/11

@Fairsfair - I’m happy to hear of your father’s improvement and I’m certainly not going to dismiss it out of hand as it seems unlike to be a placebo type effect. That said it is well documented that many people just get better on their own from any number of horrible illnesses and medical science just doesn’t know why. Yet.

http://www.quackwatch.com/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/acu.html

As for chinese medicine I think Dara O’Brien sums up my feelings pretty well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHVVKAKWXcg

Pretty much anything they find that has benefits science takes in puts it into medicine. I don’t really think ground tiger’s penis is helpful to anyone, particularly the tiger.

And as for acupunture, redirecting a mystical and unmeasureable energy called chi can cure just about anything? Doubtful. Particularly since like Feng Shui experts when it comes to how it all works no two experts agree.

PS. Come the revolution Feng Shui exponents, against the wall…*BANG*

fairsfair says:

09:23pm | 17/01/11

I haven’t looked at your links Seano (sorry something iffy with my connection) but I certainly see where you are coming from.

I think it is rather impossible for it to be the placebo effect but it is quite amazing to see. My dad can sit at a table and labour for ages to put pegs in a bucket. It is the rotation of his wrist and fingers that are the biggest issue. But after an hour with Colin - he is able to do it within only a few minutes (albeit clumsy and hardly refined). It doesn’t last for all that long, but each time it is getting longer.

Also, he isn’t actually on ground tiger penis and eye of newt or anything crazy like that. It is more a mix of things that we know of like ginger and cruciferous vegetables. I was as skeptical as anyone else before he started and was even a bit wary of the man who was doing it - but it has made a really bit difference in his life.

Poor Tiger

bec says:

09:26pm | 17/01/11

Great minds on the Dara O’Briain repost, Seano.

I think they found that there were a small number of conditions that acupuncture had a statistically significant clinical impact on: some kinds of muscle pain, and nausea. However, the improvement was so slight that you’re better off with over the counter analgesia because it’s cheaper, and generally more hygienic.

Seano says:

07:52am | 18/01/11

@fairsfair - I guess what matters is that your dad improves. But I wonder if someone had convinced him that a chiropractor would definitely cure him would he have acheived similar results? Of if someone had inserted needles at random points and called it acupunture how that would have gone?

@Bec - Dara is pretty funny. I think that those improvements you were talking about could equally have come about with a bit of human contact, I know if I have muscle pain a bit of a rub does wonders.

Elphaba says:

02:19pm | 17/01/11

That’s ok, my brother is still a Leo.  Be thankful you’re not having an identity crisis.

baal says:

12:09pm | 19/01/11

Now I am a taurean, what bullshit

Chase Stevens says:

01:51pm | 17/01/11

Atheism wins fo sho.

Roger says:

10:09am | 17/01/11

Did Peter have a Nanny?

fairsfair says:

12:29pm | 17/01/11

Its a shame Michelle couldn’t have held out for the PPL…

Besides, doesn’t Bongo know all now? We should be putting out faith in Bongo.

RT says:

01:15pm | 17/01/11

Is there any subject that you can’t write about in detail, and with wit and erudition, Zeta? But you defame Cardinal Pell. As a leading climate change sceptic, and a man who values consistency in principles, he would obviously not be drawn into a centuries-old belief system built on myths and fables.

Chase Stevens says:

01:56pm | 17/01/11

Best.Comment.Ever. Zeta you need a blog or something, this has to be some of the best stuff on The Punch.

Sludger says:

02:27pm | 17/01/11

That is probably the best post I have read.  By the way, I now have a strange desire to be a goat herder.  Must be the though of getting it on in a yurt (whatever that is).  I gotta go and buy me a yurt!

Romli065 says:

04:22pm | 17/01/11

LOL that is pure gold Zeta!  I’ve missed you and your witty comments. Keep them coming!

Scorpio Rising says:

05:49pm | 17/01/11

Most entertaining!
From now on I will scroll through rapidly until I see the name Zeta

St. Michael says:

11:07am | 17/01/11

In passing, Zeta r0xx0rs the b0xx0rs.

But I’m a bit bloody upset by some of these changes.  I’ve been turned into a stubborn, thickheaded Taurus from the intellectual Gemini I was.  Very annoying given that’s my mother was, too.  On the other hand, my wife has now gone from being a weepy, moody Cancer into a fullblown Gemini, which is cool.  My son doesn’t suffer any changes, but my daughter’s about to go through an identity crisis given, according to the table, she’s both a Leo and a Cancer.

KM says:

11:48am | 17/01/11

Oooh lucky you, I’m a Leo as well… Welcome to the best clucb in the zodiac.

Elphaba says:

12:01pm | 17/01/11

@Michael, I feel an identity crisis coming on myself.  I was quite comfortable being an analytical, tidy, critical Virgo.

My brother is still a Leo though.  And my mother is the new one, Ophiuchus.  I would love to know how to pronounce it though, but whenever I try it sounds like I’m trying to swallow one of those Tai Chi balls.

@KM, thanks for the kind welcome.  I’ll try not to let the team down.

St. Michael says:

12:24pm | 17/01/11

@ Elphaba: engaging in Zeta’s favourite game of epiph, er, epidem, er, the art of figuring out where words come from, I suspect Ophiuchus is pronounced “Oh-fee-ooh-kuss”.  Mostly because the “Ophi” derives from “ophidian”, which is a synonym for snake, and the “ch” is probably a hard ‘k’ sound given it’s derived from an ancient language and is therefore messed up by definition.

Elphaba says:

12:29pm | 17/01/11

@St Michael, sounds good, I’ll pronouce it like that for now, unless someone corrects me.

‘Ophidian’ - I love that word, it’s just not used enough, is it?

St. Michael says:

01:06pm | 17/01/11

@ Elphaba: most of the “idians” feel lovely in the mouth.  The words, that is.

Consider: Ophidian, Meridian, Veridian, Numidian.  You get to imitate a machine gun with your mouth without sounding like a complete berk.  Even Iridium, Idiom, and Amphibian sound nice, especially repeated ad nauseam for those of your offspring who annoy you.  It’s almost as satisfying as finding a word that rhymes with “orange.”

Mick says:

01:45pm | 17/01/11

It’s pronounced off-his-chops

Elphaba says:

01:50pm | 17/01/11

@St Michael, amphibian is another nice one.  They (the words) do feel nice in the mouth.

What a lovely wordy post. :-D

St. Michael says:

11:12am | 17/01/11

Dude, it’s because Scorpios just suck.   I mean, seriously, amongst lions, centaurs, and rams, you’re the only one with the carapace and lethal venom.  It’s kind of like turning up to a party in a horse costume when they hadn’t told you the costume-thing had been called off.

Jade says:

02:26pm | 17/01/11

Hey lay off the scorpios. I am quiet happy to stay a scorpio, don’t really want to be a virgo.  Besides, my personality traits suit a scoprio much better.

St. Michael says:

12:12pm | 17/01/11

Of course, he might rape them, burn down their houses, and steal their stuff, but that’s another Gospel.

Chris L says:

12:04am | 23/01/11

Khaaaaannnnnnnnn!!!!!!! In space no-one can hear you scream… unless you’re Bill Shatner.

St. Michael says:

02:42pm | 17/01/11

I really don’t know whether this was intended tongue in cheek, so let’s play it with a straight bat.

So gravity determines what kind of personality I have, and despite the Saganite billions upon billions of stars, my personality can only be one of 12, er, sorry, 13 types?

If so, and I am a vibrantly pulsing (I’m getting turned on just reading that) part of the universe, why is it only 13 sets of stars—totalling roughly, what, maybe 200 all up—in the universe which determine this? What, can’t any of the others be arsed to go influencing the destiny of carbon-based lifeforms on a mudball planet at the edge of the Milky Way?

Is it that they’re the 13 closest groups of stars in the universe?  Alpha Centuari’s our closest neighbour in terms of stars—only 6 lightyears away, hell of a lot closer and therefore a much stronger gravitic influence than, say, the combined gravitic strength of the constellation of Gemini.  I don’t recall my personal astrologer telling me that Alpha Centauri determines I’m due for a bad hair day on 1 January 2012.

“The God of the Gaps” is not a logically pleasing argument, and it does not translate well to astrology, either.

Howzat says:

06:03pm | 17/01/11

I’m no advocate for or agin astrology but since you played it with a straight bat I think I should appeal as you appear to have played and missed. 
My understanding (rudimentary as it is) is that astrological readings are derived from the positioning (or perhaps transit) of the nearest heavenly bodies i.e.Sun Moon & planets, within the a reference framework that is merely labelled according to these far off constellations.  So on that basis gravity could be a factor.  Doesn’t prove much though, except that your basis for objection isn’t really valid.

bec says:

09:27pm | 17/01/11

Is that performance art, Richard? I’d hate to flame this comment and find out later that it’s just satire.