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Thanks, but I’m not dying - I’m just single

Stephanie Anderson

by Stephanie Anderson

29 Nov 05:55am

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Filed under: Dating, Facebook, Relationships, Social Media, Young Women

126 comments

My Facebook profile has been a source of confusion and anxiety for several of my loved ones over the years. To be precise, it’s where ‘single’ has been listed next to ‘relationship status’ for longer than I care to confirm.

All the single ladies can't be wrong…

Yup, I’m 22-years-old and single. Very, very single. Apparently the spinsterhood clock is ticking for me, and it’s ticking pretty loudly.

The reaction I receive to my single status has been a source of amusement to me in recent times. The head-tilt and lip pout, followed by the ‘oh really?’ comment has become incredibly predictable. The ‘all in good time’ speech that follows has also quickly become an expectation.

However, my mother’s teasing call of ‘hope you meet a nice boy’ almost every time I leave the house really has to take the cake. My mum doesn’t discriminate between a night out on the town and a quick trip to the supermarket. Someone in my position should not overlook any opportunity, I suppose.

Fortunately for me, speaking with other single girls my age and flicking through Australia Bureau of Statistics (ABS) data has quickly shown that I am by no means the Lone Ranger when it comes to singlehood.

As a society we are waiting until later in life to commit to someone and get married, that is if we choose to get married at all. A 2000 - 2002 statistic showed that 26 per cent of Australian women will never marry in their lifetime.

If these are the cold hard facts, why does a confession of a single status warrant such concern?

I suspect it’s the strong association between being in a relationship and being happy. For some, marital status has a significant beneficial effect on their outlook on life and I can understand where that perspective comes from. Many of the challenges in life are best faced with someone by your side.

I am the first to admit that I hope one day the right guy does come along, sweeps me off my feet and makes that girlhood wedding fantasy a reality. My residency in Single Town is not a protest against the opposite sex, or relationships or even a conscious decision to face the world as Steph-no-plus-one. For me it’s a simple case of the right situation not yet to presenting itself.

So, at 22 years of age I’m officially abandoning any plans to perform a drunken rendition of Celine Dion’s ‘All By Myself’ (Bridget Jones style) and a visit Spotlight to pick up my knitting needles for the long, lonely Saturday nights that loom in my future.

Instead I’m going to focus on my studies, build my career, spend time with my family and friends and simply continue to love my life. I will also keep reassuring my loved ones that I have some time up my sleeve between now and the point where many cats will become the sole focus of my existence.

I figure I have around 30 years until then, right? Whatever the case, no social networking website – or fear of the ‘single speech’ – is going to rush me into a relationship.

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126 comments

Show oldest | newest first

    • BT says:

      05:12am | 29/11/10

      I’m 32 now, and used to really obsess over my single status if I wasn’t dating at the time. I am single at the moment and to be honest I really love it. I do want a partner later on, but right now I’m happy just doing whatever I want and not trying to impress anyone - that stuff takes time, money and beauty is definately pain. When I’m ready I’ll make an effort, but not yet. I may or may not get married one day, but I’m kind of different from most women in that I really really can’t stand the idea of a wedding. Most people my age have kids too, and I’m so grateful I don’t have their boring problems. Single life is GREAT!

      Reply

    • Lexie says:

      08:05am | 29/11/10

      Oh Wow! I’m exactly the same (only 33) - finally somebody who thinks like I do

    • DJ says:

      09:28am | 29/11/10

      Ditto and I’m 36.  I received the ‘spinster’ label when I was 23, it hurt back then, now I could care less.  Why everyone ‘has to’ get married is a bit of a joke to me, especialy when coming from couples that are not happy and constantly fighting.

    • martin says:

      11:43am | 29/11/10

      Me and you baby. I hate weddings too they make me cringe. Spending $30k on a party is demented.

    • Anne71 says:

      01:00pm | 29/11/10

      39 and single, and I agree with every word. I enjoy being single and have no intention of “settling” for someone just to fulfil society’s expectations of pairing up. If the right man came along and I honestly knew that I would be happier with him in my life than out of it I might think about marriage, but only then.
      Enjoy being 22 and single, Stephanie. There’s no rush and no pressure to settle down. You’re only young once and the years go faster than you realise - make the most of them!

    • Miles says:

      04:04pm | 29/11/10

      I have a very good friend that works in various nursing homes.  She said you can always tell the single ones (ie without kids), as they are the saddest and loneliest people there.  Whilst I don’t think people should ever settle for someone just for sake of having a relationship, I believe that a lot of people don’t think of the long term implications of their ‘single is best attitude’.  When you’re finally ‘ready’ you might find that the opportunities are gone.

    • Kelly says:

      07:51pm | 29/11/10

      Ah Miles there’s also a lot of people in aged care homes WITH children who never visit them and only take in interest when the will is being executed ....

    • sol says:

      05:58am | 29/11/10

      oh em gee there are single 22 year olds out there? hope you’ve started tinting your roots and scouting for botox injections.
      life is short, but shorter for some than others.

      Reply

    • Matt says:

      02:44pm | 29/11/10

      Why do people say life is short?  It’s the longest thing you’ll ever do raspberry

    • damo says:

      06:29am | 29/11/10

      Chillax. you’re only 22. most 22 year old women (and men for that matter) still live at home and have their lunch packed for them.

      Welcome to 2010 honey!

      Reply

    • Pat says:

      05:24pm | 30/11/10

      with house prices and the cost of living not being on par with wages.. im not surprised kids are at home when 22.. they are still trying to match savings with gains in house prices!

    • John GW says:

      06:40am | 29/11/10

      This article is so jammed with stereotypes.  Ms/Miss(?) Asher should read Tory Shepherd’s excellent piece or perhaps she should consider doing the housework instead (sorry, couldn’t resist that!)
      James May should come to Australia and open his eyes.  The proliferation of Bunnings and similar stores should buff up his ego but perhaps he should not watch the DIY TV shows where a number of women are far superior to me (and maybe him) in the renovation stakes.
      My mother did not burn her bra, but was keen for her sons to learn cooking, washing, ironing, even simple mending.  Her farsightedness proved valuable when I was living on my own (no, I did not have a live-in sex object to be my housekeeper).
      Yes, couples need to spend more time together, but this is beneficial only when we learn to accept each other and not treat the female partner as the handmaid to the master.  We also get more time together if we are prepared to share some of the housework (remember: mother’s job is never done?)  I say to my wife, you cook (far better than 1 can) and I wash up.  We get some time together then, too.

      Reply

    • Lynne says:

      07:48am | 29/11/10

      Good comment John but you have made it on the wrong article lol

    • Ross says:

      07:23am | 29/11/10

      If you were in perth I would take you out on a date….. Just to make you feel better of course wink

      Reply

    • Some 22yo guy. says:

      07:28am | 29/11/10

      Steph, if you need some help, I might be able to help a sister in need out. Coffee?

      Reply

    • Whisperer says:

      07:29am | 29/11/10

      You go girl ,normally people don’t realise life is for living until they retire ,then its too late to cram it all in .

      Reply

    • Casey says:

      07:31am | 29/11/10

      Umm, hello? You are 22! What’s the problem here?! Jesus…

      Reply

    • K says:

      09:53am | 29/11/10

      Umm, hello? There is no problem, that’s what she’s saying…the implication that being single at 22 is a bad thing is what her problem is…read the article properly…Jesus…

    • John says:

      07:34am | 29/11/10

      I’ve got to laugh, the last thing I was looking for at 22 was for ‘someone to complete me’, I can’t recall many of my mates searching that hard neither. I’ve got to agree respectfully with John GW,  I wasn’t looking for live-in sex object to be my housekeeper but I was more than willing to sample some beauties that often turned out to be desperately seeking the right man - fortunately it wasn’t me.

      It was only when I met my (now) wife who was not at all desperate to find the right man that the pressure was off and we were able to get to know each other.  My mother gave me the best advice ’ some people will take more time deciding what clothes to buy and wear than they do in selecting a partner’.  Keep the pressure off yourself Stephanie and just enjoy meeting people who interest you and who you enjoy spending time with - and in the end time will tell whether a relationship will grow - avoid becoming besotted at all cost because when the honeymoon is over reality kicks in and then it’s too late.

      Reply

    • JJ says:

      07:39am | 29/11/10

      Well done…brilliant article… 22 & confident !!

      Reply

    • MB says:

      07:39am | 29/11/10

      Just remove the relationship status from your profile altogether. Problem solved.

      Reply

    • Miss M says:

      11:57am | 29/11/10

      I tried that… I was listed as ‘Single’, got sick of the label so I went in and just removed it…

      Facebook then kindly advised everyone that “Miss M is no longer Single” - boy did that start a storm on my bloody Wall! Rofl

    • Adrian says:

      12:07pm | 29/11/10

      My friend did that for the same reason and the line “[Joe Bloggs] is no longer listed as single” popped up in all his friend’s and family’s news feeds. This prompted an influx of comments such as “Not single anymore?? Who’s the lucky lady?” and “Hey how come I’m always the last to find out??” on his facebook wall.

      It was hilarious for all of us. Except him…

    • Elphaba says:

      02:07pm | 29/11/10

      That happened to me too.  Luckily it was so long ago it doesn’t matter anymore. grin

    • Perceptions says:

      07:41am | 29/11/10

      22 is very young, but you may become a statistic of the new demographic.  The single Germaine Greers of this world campaigned for women’s liberation:  to change their ideas on men, marriage, work and children.  Women now expect men to go to work, fix the car, hang a shelf, fix the taps, move heavy furniture, paint the house, carry out household chores that only male strength can manage, mow the lawns and after that, get inside and mother the kids, cook, iron and vacuum.

      The most noticeable result of these changes to men’s traditional role is increasing commitment resistance. Men have simply dug their heels in. Femininity - what’s that?

      Our staunchly single mid-thirties nephew is university educated, a perpetual world traveller, a luxury home owner.  A tall, dark and handsome who “might” entertain marriage, but never entertain a working wife/mother if there were children.  He would expect a pre-nuptial agreement to safeguard both parties.  The risk of financially secure men and women splitting their hard-earned assets after a two-year stint at cohabitation isn’t much of a prospect.

      Given the freedoms of sometimes awesome lifestyles and strong views on traditional marriage, and all those off-putting ugly marriage breakups resulting in “lost” children, I can truly understand why we are seeing more men and women similar to our nephew choosing to go it alone.  I forecast a new demographic:  singles of both sexes going it alone and accompanied by hundreds of thousands of similar others.

      Reply

    • E says:

      08:32am | 29/11/10

      It’s one thing to go it alone and another to be lonely.  I hope your nephew doesn’t turn around in 10 years and realise he has no one to share his memories with.  At the same time, I’m not saying he has to find a partner, but sometimes I feel people cut off their nose to spite their face in an attempt to prove a point.

    • Trish says:

      09:49am | 29/11/10

      Utter rubbish - what a diatribe of sexist attacks on women. The poor put-upon male of the species!!
      Your nephew’s attitudes to women - that they are after his material wealth and have to be guarded against - and the fact that he has decided in advance what he will and will not ‘tolerate’ in a wife, make him a pretty poor choice of life partner. Maybe that’s why he’s single!?

    • Elphaba says:

      10:01am | 29/11/10

      Just because you don’t understand why someone would choose singledom does not mean he’s being some rebel trying to prove a point.

    • Mariposa says:

      10:28am | 29/11/10

      Being single by choice does not mean you’ll be lonely. That’s a myth.  Some people don’t need a relationship, just like some people don’t need kids.  Both are growing demographics.

      There are loads of social groups and volunteer orgs that mean individuals can make friends and actively participate in their community.

      Sometimes the reason people undertake these choices is due to societal pressure and the constant positive messages from popular culture to undertake such life choices, not because they really want to.

    • Aman says:

      12:21pm | 29/11/10

      @E
      A man can find a woman at any age. It’s simple for men. The more assets he has the simpler it gets. I know plenty of men dating women less than half their age.

      @Trish
      You sound like the type of harpie that thinks she can get away with anything and the man has to tolerate it. You’re wrong. The older a man gets the more he know what he won’t put up with. There are women out there that don’t carry on with that drivel. Men will find them.

      A man is also smart if he protects his assets. He earned them so he should protect them.

    • Tom says:

      01:45pm | 29/11/10

      I was planing to ask my fiance to sign a prenup, but then she surprised me by asking that I sign one!!!  Maybe a tactic to scare me into not asking haha

    • M says:

      03:24pm | 30/11/10

      If I had a man who told me I couldn’t bringing home the bacon (whether it is some or all) he’d be kicked to the curb. He wouldn’t tolerate a working wife or mother? Fine, in that way now at least most women who love what they do and the freedoms that come can now cross him off their list and go for a real man, who would in fact be happy that his wife is capable and wouldn’t feel any less a man. One of the flaws of being married to someone like your nephew, when I was, was the mere fact that my ex husband could not stand the fact that I was able to do what he viewed was the traditional male role. I, in the meantime could not stand being stifled. Luckily I had the gall to ignore him and go ahead to do what I wanted. I can’t say I shed any tears when that marriage broke up. I have children but I am still a free woman.

    • BobbyDan says:

      07:51am | 29/11/10

      You are not dead until your last gasp of air or your body clock stops. Having been close to death with cancer, stroke and a heart attack I have looked into the Black Hole. But fought back as I still had things to do, places to go and people to love and say Thank You to for being part of my life.

      I will choose my time to go, but before I do I will do be my best to be nice and do good things and apoligise to people I have offended. At 70+ you havea different view of the world.

      Reply

    • Adam Diver says:

      08:03am | 29/11/10

      You know what, I would love to see an article from someone 70+. All I see here is Gen Y related articles, which really offer very little insight (perhaps because I am Gen Y or perhaps not).

      I have found that almost everything I have been told growing up has turned out to be true with the passage of time and I would love to see this insight for the next 50 years of my life smile

    • Grumpy says:

      11:02am | 29/11/10

      Agreed Adam, wisdom from older generations is so undervalued these days. Im 29 and feel like every piece of advice or opinion I read is just a waste of time taking on board. Including this crap here…

    • BobbyDan says:

      05:44am | 30/11/10

      Adam Diver & Grumpy:
      I was born on 01/06/1941 so I am a tad under 70, I hope you follow your posts and come back and read this advice.
      1. You have to come home sometime: from Gma as I ran away after being cheeky.
      2. From G’pa:
      a) never take more than you need for a meal today when fishing,
      b) never point a gun at anything that you do not intend to kill,
      c) if in danger, throw the first punch and make it a good one,
      d) never look back as you run .....
      3. From Mum: Live by the 10 Commandments.
      4. From Dad: (many, but these stuck in my mind),
      a) open your eyes, before you open your mouth,
      b) listen to both sides of an arguement,
      c) never join a Club unless you are prepared to be part of it,
      d) never play around with a girl that are not to marry.
      5. From a Trade Instructor:
      a) measure twice, cut once,
      b) do a job right, so you only do it once,
      c) always say Thank you, when you get paid for your work.
      6. From an Old Warrant Officer, when I first joined the RAAF:
      a) never tell a lie, as you only really remember the truth,
      b) never start or repeat a rumour,
      c) believe only what you read and keep it to yourself (see b.)
      d) lead from the front and the troops will follow.
      7. General advice:
      a) look in the mirror daily and Love the person you see,
      b) check your pants fly is done up, after .......
      c) choose your friends wisely.
      These all guided my life from about 5 to 21 years of age, since then only one sticks: Never close the Book of Life until you have read all the Chapters and added one about yourself.

    • Rebecca says:

      08:45am | 30/11/10

      Bobby Dan, you should write one of the op-eds here. Definitely!

    • BobbyDan says:

      02:20pm | 30/11/10

      Rebbeca: When I stop being busy, I will write more, but by the time I stop being busy;
      I will not be able to, see, think clearly, open a can etc, let alone write.

    • Macca says:

      07:59am | 29/11/10

      So, do you here often?

      Reply

    • Old mother hubbard says:

      08:03am | 29/11/10

      Try being 36 and single…in a world full of 22 year old single girls…embrace and enjoy!

      Reply

    • mick says:

      08:14am | 29/11/10

      slow news day, someones 22 and single. all this confirms is that certain elements of society are so self-centred they think we care.

      Reply

    • Michael says:

      09:45am | 29/11/10

      I care - especially because Stephanie is Hot!

      Good article too.

    • Chinaski says:

      11:01am | 29/11/10

      I love it when people comment on how it must be a “slow news day”, seemingly ignoring the fact that this is an opinion site, not a newsfeed.

    • Knit says:

      08:24am | 29/11/10

      Some people just aren’t meant to be in meaningful relationship, they just don’t have the capacity. But it doesn’t necessarily mean your life has to be worthless - some women like to dedicate their time on earth to caring for cats, for instance.

      Reply

    • Bitten says:

      09:20am | 29/11/10

      Oh please. Like every person in every relationship currently in existence is a worthy individual making a positive contribution. Must be all those single people catching STDs, making all those neglected babies and clogging up the family courts.

    • Loxy says:

      08:27am | 29/11/10

      Unless you live in hicksville I can’t for the life of me imagine anyone thinking a 22 year old being single is strange. In fact, I think you would find (once again in the cities) that if you had settled down by such a young age you would cop a lot more flak from people.

      Reply

    • Novocastrian says:

      09:55am | 29/11/10

      I have to agree. As a recently single 27-year-old from Newcastle, it does feel like I’ve missed the boat. Everyone in this town settles down and starts popping out kids by 25. It’s insane that as twenty somethings we feel old and past it and yet there is a current running through our generation that has led us to feel this way. I don’t get it.

    • Novocastrian says:

      09:55am | 29/11/10

      I have to agree. As a recently single 27-year-old from Newcastle, it does feel like I’ve missed the boat. Everyone in this town settles down and starts popping out kids by 25. It’s insane that as twenty somethings we feel old and past it and yet there is a current running through our generation that has led us to feel this way. I don’t get it.

    • Former Novocastrian says:

      01:18pm | 29/11/10

      I’m hearing you on that point Novocastrian. I grew up in Newcastle and during my University years I had a girlfriend. In my final year I was offered a graduate placement down in Canberra and told her about the news.

      She was less than ecstatic and insisted that I remain in Newcastle or I would lose her. She was never interested in pursuing a career and had no real aspirations for the future. I promptly dumped her and didn’t look back. I haven’t had a girlfriend since, but I’ve made plenty of good friends, been on a Contiki tour of Europe, travelled around Australia and bought a house up in Brisbane. All while pursuing a successful IT career.

      All of my friends who are still in Newcastle are married now and while I’m happy for them I really enjoy the freedom and zero accountability (e.g. “where have you been?”) associated with single life. At 28 years of age I’m not really concerned if I don’t end up married. There’s more to life than marriage. And when I see parents in shopping centres trying to control their rowdy children, I feel sorry for them.

      Single life is awesome in so many ways. My mortgage broker once asked me how I managed to save up a sizeable deposit for my current home. I told her “easy, I don’t have a girlfriend”.

    • zoe says:

      02:58pm | 29/11/10

      Oh please, Novocastrian, I got married at 22 and I got much more flak for that than if I’d been single, and that was almost 10 years ago.

    • marie says:

      08:41am | 29/11/10

      this was ridiculous! surely you have better things to write about at your age…get back to us when youre 42 and single honey! seriously!!

      Reply

    • Romli065 says:

      10:16am | 29/11/10

      I agree.  Ridiculous article.  To be obsessing about being single at 22 is just preposterous.  Frankly I think to be obsessing about being single at any age is a bit silly.  It’s not like it’s a disease FGS!  I’m 45 and I choose not to be married, and I have a cat, what’s the biggie?  I value my independence, my privacy, I like earing and having my own money to myself, and frankly I think sex is WAY overrated and I’m over it.  I prefer a more peaceful, Zen existence and I’m getting tired of being criticised for it by society’s desperados who think one’s life is only worth something if your Facebook status says you’re “in a relationship”.  By the way, I do have a boyfriend of 9 years but we don’t live together, we are not in each other’s pockets, and things work out just fine.  Maybe it’s because we give each other space and freedom.

    • acinom says:

      01:20pm | 06/12/10

      Umm did you read the article?? It seems to me that Stephanie is not the one obsessing about her singledom, but the people around her!!

    • JC says:

      08:47am | 29/11/10

      Wow - 22 and you’re reflecting on your single status. It’s great to see you’ve got plans for yourself, but really, it seems like you have a need to justify your single status. At the ripe old age of 22 . . . All I can suggest is stay focused and enjoy yourself!

      Reply

    • Elphaba says:

      08:49am | 29/11/10

      You know you can change the relationship status of your FB profile to no status, right?

      You’re 22. I wouldn’t worry about it.  Proper blokes do not want to marry some ditzy airhead who has put ‘husband’ at the top of her priority list.  You’re doing the right thing by geting out there and broadening your mind.  The right bloke will come along, but if he doesn’t, you’ll have a rich, full life without one.  Enjoy it, because your life will go on hold the minute you have kids, and you won’t get it back until they’ve grown up.

      Reply

    • salo says:

      08:57am | 29/11/10

      There’s a bandwagon here called ‘22? Wotsa problem’? and I never get on bandwagons.

      Reply

    • Wild oats says:

      09:06am | 29/11/10

      Oh Josephine, count yourself bloody lucky that ‘the right situation’ hasn’t yet presented itself. Couple-up now and you’ll miss out on a sizeable chunk of incredible fun and wonderful, character building adventures that you’ll look back on when you’re an old biddy and be glad you did. Couple-up now and you’ll regret it. You’ll also get old faster. Trust me. wink

      Reply

    • Kate says:

      01:52pm | 29/11/10

      I’m 22 and in a serious relationship. I’ve been in and out of similarly serious relationships since age 15. I’ve done the going out to pubs, having random hookups thing and I don’t miss it one bit.

      You can still have incredible fun and adventures when you’re in a relationship.

    • D says:

      09:06am | 29/11/10

      I’m 34 & single. This is when its time to panic. 22! Who cares….

      Reply

    • Matthew says:

      11:50am | 29/11/10

      You’re 34 and single because you didn’t worry about it at 22.

    • AdamC says:

      12:08pm | 29/11/10

      Haha, zing!

      Seriously, though, the best time for a woman to settle down with a man is between 26 and 28. It is a scientific fact.

    • Bitten says:

      04:00pm | 29/11/10

      Scientific according to whom? You and the boys after a dozen pints? Douche.

    • Lauren says:

      09:23am | 29/11/10

      As a 23 year old single woman I didn’t think I had anything to worry about. Thanks!

      Also, hide your facebook relationship status.

      Reply

    • Gregg says:

      09:36am | 29/11/10

      You’re still just a babe Steph and a studious one at that living in the comforts of home.
      I reckon when there’s a no show for breakfast occurring regularly or initially, that mother’s teasing call could be something different.

      Reply

    • Clare says:

      09:45am | 29/11/10

      OMG you are only 22!!!  You are supposed to be single at that age.  Get over it girl!!!  *eyeroll*

      Reply

    • louis says:

      09:47am | 29/11/10

      Yeah look that’s great and all but you’re only 22. I’m 32 and have seen this attitude from many a young woman go flying right out the window the moment they realise that the next exciting new guy isn’t just a girl’s night out away. The fact is when you’re 30 and looking for that 30 something guy, you’re gonna be competing with all those 20 something girls too, because they too want the settled guy with good prospects just like the 30 and 40 somethings too and by 30 the ratio of men to women starts to go badly for women.

      It’s great that you’re single, let’s say you get married in your late 20s it’s better for the guy and you that you have been around, developed yourself as a single and not just always been part of a couple. I think it greatly improves your chances of a long happy marriage. i.e. you won’t have that grass is so much greener stage or that need to find yourself.

      So what’s my point? I guess you are on the right track but just realise that you won’t always feel the way you do now. And don’t do the other thing I have seen so many young women do and that is run back and married (get pregnant) to the last guy they had good reason to leave simply because the realisation I mentioned was too scary a prospect to face.

      Reply

    • Steph says:

      09:50am | 29/11/10

      As a fellow 22 year old single Steph, I salute you. :D

      Reply

    • Bex says:

      09:51am | 29/11/10

      I don’t understand this article to be honest - if this was written any time before the 50’s I’d understand it, but when has their been pressure on 22 year olds to marry off? I’m 26 and very happily partnered, but I never felt any pressure and still don’t feel any pressure to marry off.

      Reply

    • Jane says:

      09:54am | 29/11/10

      You have an awesome attitude and outlook on life - there are many that could learn from your positivity!

      Thanks for a great article.

      Reply

    • Moe says:

      10:10am | 29/11/10

      Would have been a more compelling opening paragraph if your were 42 and “still single”..... At 22, you still have plenty of years ahead of you to become bitter, disappointed and cynical.

      Reply

    • Moe says:

      10:11am | 29/11/10

      Would have been a more compelling opening paragraph if your were 42 and “still single”..... At 22, you still have plenty of years ahead of you to become bitter, disappointed and cynical.

      Reply

    • Crazy Cat Lady in Waiting says:

      10:11am | 29/11/10

      22 and single? Pfffttt…  try being 46 and single Stephanie.

      Recently I decided to re-enter the dating game and gave a well known dating site a go but the only match ups I could get were all 55+.
      According to the dating experts, women in my age group need to look at the 60+ demographic in order to get a partner these days. Sure it’s nice to have someone by your side but joy of life does not only have to come through romantic relationships and as I have no desire to become a full time carer to someone with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel I’ve decided to stick to cats instead.

      Reply

    • Shelly says:

      04:05pm | 30/11/10

      I’m with you CCLiW except I don’t like cats. And I’m 41. Thinking of getting chickens instead of the cats. Is a man under 60 with all his own teeth too much to ask for?

    • Ginger says:

      10:22am | 29/11/10

      Um actually, amongst peers its more accepted to be single in your twenties than not. I’m 24 and planning to get married next March to my finance- we’ve been engaged for two years. I fully cop criticism about it. People ask me if we’re religious, if it’s a shotgun wedding, etc. I’m successful professionally and earn mroe than my partner and have no plans to have children with my husband to be. I just want to be married to him because I love him and that’s way more difficult for my social network to accept than it would if I was single.

      Reply

    • Kate says:

      02:00pm | 29/11/10

      I agree Ginger.

      I’m 22, living with my boyfriend and planning to get married in the next 2-3 years after I’ve finished uni. I get comments all the time like ‘but don’t you want to see what else is out there?’ or ‘so are you just going to quit your job and have babies?’.
      I’ve always been a ‘relationship’ person, and when I’ve been single I didn’t enjoy it much. There’s only so many drunken hook ups you can have before you start thinking it’s all a bit pathetic.

    • R says:

      10:25am | 29/11/10

      First, Facebook is evil! LOL. Second, I envy your confidence. I was a wreck when I was single at 22. So I married the first guy who came along and was divorced by 30. Now I’m happily single only because I know the alternative is worse. I wish I hadn’t had to learn the hard way.

      Reply

    • S says:

      10:27am | 29/11/10

      Looks like Steph has been watching too much SATC and has been ‘Carried’ away.

      Maybe get some more life experience before instructing the nation as to why it is okay to be single at 22.

      Reply

    • Matthew says:

      10:29am | 29/11/10

      I know that feeling.  I’m only 23 but my dad is constantly making comments/asking about the ‘cute girl’ and I just roll my eyes at him.  No more of that since I moved out at the beginning of the year though.

      Besides, you seem to be (from the photo) a good looking girl, I’m sure you’ll have no trouble, just give it a bit of time.

      Reply

    • Elphaba says:

      10:35am | 29/11/10

      The freedom of living out of home - nothing compares! grin

    • Matthew says:

      11:34am | 29/11/10

      Yeah well, I’m not *completely* out of home.  Moved from Parents place in Brisbane to My sister’s place (She’s 9 years older) in Melbourne.  1600kms gap from Dad is wonderful though (most of the time)!

    • Elphaba says:

      01:34pm | 29/11/10

      Siblings are different.  They’re not going to rag on you for eating Cheezles for dinner. wink

      I love my parents to death, but having been out of home since I was 18, more than 5 days in Mum’s company and I start itching for my space again…

    • hot tub political machine says:

      10:42am | 29/11/10

      Yeah I think parents just worry about their kids, because they worry about their kids. Its only natural.

      Oh and yes I believe the approach of not being closed - but not looking for just anyone-is the right one too. I’m not sinlge now but when I was I had ridiculously high standards, but would always be willing to make new friends. Punch above your weight I reckon - even if your’e a champ yourself.

      Better being single than with someone you don’t want to be with.

      Reply

    • bella starkey says:

      10:48am | 29/11/10

      Ok, so I’m not much older than you and if I announced to my mother that I met someone I wanted to settle down with she would tell me to stop being so childish and pack me off overseas or something similar.

      Some of the most maladjusted humans I know met someone at 19 and haven’t the confidence to get rid of them. They are “comfortable” so they can cope with the fact they are miserable.

      You are 22 years old FFS. do you really want to jump on the next guy you meet and hope that he doesnt turn out to be completely wrong for you in ten years time?
      Christ, I can’t even commit to a mobile phone contract nevermind another human being for the rest of my life.

      Reply

    • Matthew says:

      12:08pm | 29/11/10

      You don’t have to be married to not be single.  She’s not talking about marrying someone within 2 minutes of meeting him.

    • Geoff says:

      10:52am | 29/11/10

      22 eh? My experience seems to point to most women not really being ready for a real relationship till they are at least 25.  So at least 3 more years before you should even start contemplating a serious commitment, or flaky friends etc worrying you about one.
      “All by Myself” Eric Carmen?  Yes the original goes further back than Dion. Personally I like “Going Nowhere” The Moody Blues… well perhaps “like” is the wrong word…  “relate” might be better.

      Reply

    • Ben from the Bush says:

      11:10am | 29/11/10

      Seems to me a lot of commentators above haven’t read past the first few lines of this article.
      My reading is Stephanie is making comment on other peoples (i.e. her friends and family) ridiculous preconceptions on her rather than having any personal hang up about her age:status mix.
      To me it would seem she is totally at peace with where things are at in her life and enjoying the prospect of getting on with it.

      Reply

    • Alyssa KT says:

      11:10am | 29/11/10

      Not sure why anyone would be worried at 22 - unless you’ve never had a boyfriend - or been kissed - ha

      When I was 22 one of those time share companies called me, referring to me as Mrs T_____ and rushing through their spiel without letting me get a word in. When I told them I was only 22 (not over 25) and did not earn over $50K per year I was told it was okay, and asked about my husband. When I told her I wasn’t married I received a shocked pause, then a pitied “what, you’re all alone??” - haha. Yes, 22 and unmarried - what a sorry crime!

      Reply

    • bec says:

      11:24am | 29/11/10

      Alyssa, what a horrible prospect: not being sucked into a timeshare. Surely it’s time that we renounce feminism entirely, if a crappy yet-to-be-constructed apartment in Carpentaria is the bounty we can get!

    • happily coupled up says:

      11:19am | 29/11/10

      22 is still a baby.  Ifyou’re still single in 10-15 eyars, then start panicking

      Reply

    • Debbe says:

      11:19am | 29/11/10

      Hello…you go girl, besides, what’s the rush?  I loved being single, not saying that I’m not happy being married, but I was nearly 40 before I got that far, and can’t say I missed a thing along the way.  When it’s right it’s right, and if it’s not, then don’t worry, you’re doing things right!

      Reply

    • Brett says:

      11:26am | 29/11/10

      Thanks Stephanie, profound stuff, another self-absorbed 22 year old with a keyboard and an internet connection, dont see that everyday…well done, youve made the world a better place

      Reply

    • Shane says:

      09:14am | 30/11/10

      Now Brett, there is no need to get nasty just because her opinion is heard and the best you can do is post tedious comments.

    • Chris says:

      11:38am | 29/11/10

      What shocks me recently is the prejudice and huge emphasis placed on age particularly from younger people. It seems to me that younger people are becoming more obsessed with following trends too. If you haven’t travelled, chosen your career path and got a mortgage by 30 the feeling is there is something wrong with you. What bollocks!

      To me the pressure seems to be from parents and friends. Are we placing too much emphasis on young people to follow suite and to have done things by a certain age? Are young people then rebelling and then waiting as long as they dare then to ‘settle down’ too? Yawn… boring.

      So what if you are 22 and single or 36 and single. Does that make you a bad person? Why are we so focused on hitting targets by age? So what if you find a guy/girl you want to be with forever by the age of 20? I’ve seen and heard young lovers be criticized too. Just butt out people.

      I’m 36 and find now I’ve lost credibility and friends because I’m single again. I’m still the nice guy I always was. I’m just unlucky in love. I can’t make the other person ready to marry. I have felt the pressure of my past girlfriends friends and families interference too. So now I’m single at 36 people then think there is something wrong with me. I get that all the time now. Then people take a moment to get to know me and realise I’m a nice guy but then the loop starts again. Why are you single? There must be something wrong and they keep looking until they find a flaw. Guess what… we all have flaws and we will find them in everyone the further we look. Does that mean I am or you are a bad guy/girl or poor catch? No.

      Reply

    • MF says:

      11:39am | 29/11/10

      30, single and happy. I can do what I want, when I want. No giving anybody else a second thought. Yes, it’s selfish. No, I don’t care. I like my life.

      My family are constantly harping on me to settle down, get married and have kids. It’s relentless.  I’ve already had the serious conversation about not wanting to get married or have kids. They think I’m joking. I realise now that they’re probably not going to let up on it, there’s this preconceived notion that that’s what you are meant to do with your life. And sure, my family might be disappointed in me, but it’s not their life to live. It’s mine.

      Don’t worry about it. If you’re happy, stuff what everyone else thinks.

      Reply

    • rt says:

      11:40am | 29/11/10

      I find it very odd that your family and friends are giving you stick for being single at 22, Stephanie. As a 23-y-o single woman, I have never had a single remark from family/friends.

      In fact I’d say it has become so accepted for young women to be single that it is actually young married women who cop more flak and raised eyebrows these days.

      Reply

    • Suzi says:

      12:13pm | 29/11/10

      I am 27 and a long term (about 10 years since last relationship) single. Most of the time, I really don’t care. But there are times that I wonder “what if?”. I used to get harrassed relentlessly but I think people have realised that God has made me to be single.

      Reply

    • Peace and Quiet says:

      12:17pm | 29/11/10

      Despite what your mother tells you, it’s normal to be single at 22. Most people are. Relax, serious spinsterhood is still years away yet. You’re never going to look hotter than you do right now, so enjoy it, while it lasts.

      Being single doesn’t have to mean sitting at home watching TV or knitting on a Friday night (you’ll have plenty of time for that when you have children). There’s no law says you need to buy a cat either. Cats are almost as bad as husbands; they take over your life. Being single means I can go out wherever and whenever I like, do what I want, wear what I want and never have to hide my purchases from my partner. Try that as an ‘attached’ woman.

      Reply

    • Drew(Darlinghurst) says:

      12:34pm | 29/11/10

      Anyone who starts a blog entry by ” My Facebook profile”.....deserves to be single.

      Have a nice day !

      Reply

    • St. Michael says:

      12:35pm | 29/11/10

      Nothing wrong with being female, single and 22.

      But from a purely biological standpoint, if you’re still single from the age of 30, you had best be sure that you definitely don’t want to have kids, or at least sure that you don’t want to spend many thousands of dollars on IVF procedures when you can’t conceive naturally.  Female fertility drops drastically from the early 30s onwards.  Ask your gynaecologist for yourself.  That’s the biological clock for women.  Sorry to say so, but it’s true.

      On the other hand, it’s damned if you do and damned if you don’t, since marriages statistically have a much higher survival rate when commenced with both partners in their 30s.

      Reply

    • David Johnson says:

      12:36pm | 29/11/10

      Well good luck to you ... I only hope that you recognize your ‘biological clock’ in time. Too many women these days have overcompensated, and realize only too late that they wanted to start a family, and then either (a) haven’t met the right one, or (b) are too old to fall pregnant naturally.

      You don’t EVER want to go through that kind of regret. I’ve got too many friends / family who wasted their twenties with fleeting relationships (or staying with the wrong guy for WAY too long (for convenience)). And then, they have the gall to turn around and bitch and moan when they hit 30, partner-less and child-less.

      Or worse, having to help them through the tragedy of their failed attempts at conception.

      So again, good luck to you.

      Reply

    • Bitten says:

      03:59pm | 29/11/10

      Oh my goodness - imagine having to support one’s friends through their trials and tribulations! What a selfish place the world has become when this is considered a hassle! You just scored off the charts of doucheness.

    • VSB says:

      01:05pm | 29/11/10

      I am 33 and single and spend much of my time working at weddings, alongside the couple. Doing this for a number of years has instilled a sense of not wanting marriage for myself. Instead I view marriage for what it appears to be - a contract between two people and the government. Thousands of dollars gets spent on the fantasy, or dream ideal of being a princess for a day, finally reaching the end of the story book where they live ‘happily ever after’. Unfortunately, quite a few couples I have worked with have gone their separate ways since the marriage, the latest lasted only a year. I felt sorry for the parents who dished out, let alone the heartache of the couple.  I wonder why we all want to do the same thing and follow traditions that may not have any relevance to modern life. From what I can tell, the majority of couples want to be together and have children however, feel a sense of pressure about being committed for life, and that they wanted to inject some energy into their long-term relationship, for themselves and their families. Single or in a relationship, what does it matter as long as you are living a life you deeply admire.

      Reply

    • hot tub political machine says:

      01:22pm | 29/11/10

      VSB, I guess you would see some nasty stuff up front there. Personally I desire to be married, but if I thought the other half of the marriage thought it was a contract we are entering into (you do this for me, I do this for you) I would run the other way.

      Ahh, now we both believe in “I will be yours and keep being yours even when you don’t always treat me well” ....that’s something I would be interested in. A marriage where either couple wants to jump because the other is letting them down is a pretty fragile thing. I want one where its not “if you love me then I will love you” but simply “I will love you”

    • kylie says:

      01:11pm | 29/11/10

      Steph, I very much agree. Friends and family constantly asking if you’ve met someone is an absolute pain!
      I’m 26 female single and shifted for work halfway (literally) across the country for work six months ago and all I hear from friends family and some of my new colleagues is have you found a man yet? Like it doesn’t take time for me to learn my new job, build new social and professional networks through which I’m likely to meet a guy, if I want too (never been a fan of hanging out in bars trying to pick up).
      Friends and family constantly asking that question “Have you met a nice guy yet?” is really starting to bug me. I’m enjoying myself right now, being single and in control of my life and am making plans to buy my own place and do some travelling. If I met a man who I found interesting and who found me interesting great, if not than that’s great too.

      Reply

    • IF says:

      01:12pm | 29/11/10

      Try coming from an extremely traditional ethinic family…

      I’m 23 and single, and I have been feeling the pressure to get married since i was 20. Constantly being told that I will soon have grey hair and once im past 25, only men in their 40’s will be interested in me…

      :(

      Reply

    • Secondmouse says:

      01:37pm | 29/11/10

      How rude. Sounds like you need to work on your “death-stare”. Trust me, works like a charm, nobody asks you about you personal life and it’s a good way of getting rid of losers.

      As for the grey hair, if they stat on you, tell them you’ll dye it.

    • Tom says:

      01:47pm | 29/11/10

      Perhaps you are single because you are a journalist and have no grip on reality?

      Reply

    • Joe says:

      02:09pm | 29/11/10

      And who wants to get into a relationship with someone who is so aware of her “single-ness” and all this expectation of “finding the right guy”... Imagine the pressure. What happened to just falling in love, no expectations. But nowadays a woman’s clock is ticking, her parents are waiting, her friends are expecting, so you have to be “THE GUY”. Too much! Too hard!

      Good luck

      Reply

    • Russ says:

      02:10pm | 29/11/10

      I am 39 & had, until recently, been single for the better part of the last 10 or so years. I had accepted it & was very comfortable with being single. Recently I’ve met someone,  smart, witty & great fun to be around & most importantly she likes me for me. I wasnt looking, it just came out of the blue & Im now realising how much I missed being in a relationship. I’m now not getting the jibes about being single or even gay which is a bonus.

      Reply

    • jade says:

      02:20pm | 29/11/10

      I think everyone is different. I am 23 and have been with my boyfriend for 6 years (since grade 12) and can’t wait to get married, buy a house and settle down. A majority of my friends are all in long term relationships, married and or have kids.

      I’m not interested in travel, having a big wage or a fancy car, I would rather be happy with loved ones and friends around me smile

      Reply

    • Wilma J Craig says:

      02:30pm | 29/11/10

      Don’t be so hard on your poor, old Mum when she says “I hope you meet a nice boy” Though I am closing in on being 4 times your age I still remember how I met the love of my life & it wasn’t at some fancy party or late-night ‘do’! It was in the days of “BS” Before Supermarkets! I will never forget it for it was in the local “Serv-Wel” Self Service Grocery Store in Belair in the Adelaide Hills that I met him. The building is still there though the Serv-Wel & my lad are long-since gone. He was buying milk & I some eggs. We later made scambled eggs together! My grandson Jason met his partner in a Coles Supermarket!
      There’s hope for you yet!

      Reply

    • TheRealDave says:

      03:21pm | 29/11/10

      Oh for gods sake - you’re 22 not bloody 52!

      Here’s a tip, its not 1950 any more, not for quite some time actually, despite the Liberal party trying to drag us back there. No one with more than half a brain has been ‘agonizing’ over the status of 22 year olds for quite a few decades now.

      If being ‘single’ is the greatest source of stress for you at 22 then count yourself extremely lucky….either that or you are an egotistical pretentious muppet. Take your pick.

      Reply

    • Robert Smissen, rural SA, God's own country says:

      03:53pm | 29/11/10

      22 & single, yes? ?  But still living with Mummy & daddy, how pathetic! ! ! ! !

      Reply

    • loz says:

      04:25pm | 29/11/10

      When she was 22 the future looked bright,
      But she’s nearly 30 now and she’s out every night,
      I see that look in her face, she’s got that look in her eye,
      She’s thinking how did I get here and wondering why…

      Reply

    • alice says:

      04:51pm | 29/11/10

      to all those saying it’s pathetic to be worrying about singledom at 22, you’re missing the point. It’s not the author that’s worried, it is all those around her!

      I’m in a similar boat, 22 years old, finishing off a double degree at uni, living by myself, saving for a trip at the end of uni…. but, my mother asks me about grandkids and boyfriends every single time I see her. every time. add to that the fact that I do not have one (yes, not one) single friend anymore, every last one of my friends are either married or in long term relationships, and are constantly talking about how great it will be when I am no longer single etc.  Oh, and it’s not like I can go out and get single friends - all the girls from work, all my inner circle, all my old school and uni friends - taken.

      There does especially seem to be a barrier put up between the singletons and the couples - not by those that are single, but by the others. I was happily single, (and still am in a lot of respects) until it became an issue for my friends. Now, my two two best friends (who only know each other through me) see more of each other because they have regular double dates with their husband and parter respectively. And I can’t come, because that would be strange.

      It’s not the singleness that’s causing stress for me, it’s the fact that it creates barriers in my relationships with others, and the constant pressure from friends and family that being single is a bad bad thing

      Reply

    • Soph says:

      11:35pm | 29/11/10

      I’m in the same boat. I really liked this article. 22, single, no worries.

      2 years ago my 2 besties were single it was a non-issue. Now they talk as though I have a problem that needs to be fixed. I haven’t changed so why does their view of me have to? Unless I met someone I found reallyreally exceptional and who reflected my feelings, I’m content to just meet people and have fun. I don’t see what’s so wrong with that at 22 or 52, so long as I’m happy with it.

      Every year at Christmas (looming again) relatives inquire as to whether I have a partner yet (thankfully my mum doesn’t care) and I always deflect with jokes, lest they follow up with the surprised/concerned: “why?”. I don’t know why. Just because? The real answer would be because the guys I have dated soon became boring or clingy, not interested, want a doormat/maid/mum or they just weren’t the right fit. But I can’t say that because then I’m too judgemental/ conceited/ picky/ critical. I’m not criticising men, on the contrary – guys are great. I just don’t see why I have to stay with one my whole life in order to call the relationship meaningful, especially if I’m just doing it for other people and not myself.

      I don’t choose to be single, I just am. I don’t choose not to care. I just don’t.

    • jane wallace says:

      05:41pm | 29/11/10

      there are more single people alive than married people and partnered people.
      remember the old fairfield car sign
      ” I lost my dog and my wife.
      reward for dog”

      Reply

    • PS says:

      09:04pm | 29/11/10

      Alice I absolutely totally relate to you…I’m almost 22 and most if not all of my friends are in serious relationships, one is married, one is engaged, one soon will be, and the rest are all in long term partnerships. I’m single and apart from a short fling or two I always have been. I don’t mind being single, in fact in some respects I prefer it, but I do care that it affects my friendships and makes me uncomfortable in social situations when I suddenly realize that I’m like the 9th wheel…the only single person in a whole group of couples. And people constantly asking if I’ve met anyone and the pitying ‘surprise’ when I say I’m still single.

      I’m definitely feeling a pressure to find someone and settle down…it really doesn’t help either that for the majority of my coupled up friends, their current partner is really their first serious one. So it’s like I’ve missed some important milestone or something…the grown up equivalent of still wearing a crop top when your better endowed friends have moved on to underwire wink Sigh.

      Reply

    • daniel says:

      07:10am | 30/11/10

      Don’t back away from a relationship either, you’re only young once, 18-25 is the best part of your life, go out and fuck as much as you can. Don’t worry about long-term relationships, but do have fun, and don’t hold back because you’re focused on your career or studies, you can do both and still have a fun relationship.
      Nothing worse than waking up one day when you’re 30 and realising you wasted the best years of your life.

      Reply

    • Bob Jerunc says:

      08:13am | 30/11/10

      Age comes with experience….at 22, you’ve got a looooong way to go young-un.

      Reply

    • NoOne says:

      09:46am | 30/11/10

      Oh yay yet another artice about people’s facebook and twitter lives! Hurray to modern journalism - not. Single at 22? Really? Who cares?

      Reply

    • Chris says:

      10:27am | 30/11/10

      Wish I was also 22. Got married at 21…cost me half a house (fully paid).
      Made another mistake a few years later ....minus $1.7M and finally woke up. During that time I was travelling the world worrying about getting home when I should have been enjoying the company of the 10-15 girls of your age that I traveled with and stayed in 5 star hotels in exotic locations. Took me a while but now very happy to be single again. At my advanced age of 55 there are still plenty of opposite sex attractions if I bother to look.

      Reply

    • Perin1973 says:

      01:55pm | 30/11/10

      I began to cry
      when you said goodbye,
      and you slipped into my
      dreams and my desires.
      Now,
      everything I remember,
      I remember wrong.
      I don’t remember
      how to say
      the words that made you smile;
      and I can’t forget the words that took my life.
      I don’t remember these, and other crimes.
      My bedroom mirror is cluttered with
      ghosts of you, undressing for me
      as I lay still
      in this bed where I once counted your eyelashes
      and sometimes
      fumbling in the drawers beside me.
      Beneath a bouquet,
      Oils and petals and other things
      reminders of
      a life once lived.

      Reply

    • MandM says:

      02:20pm | 30/11/10

      This is very beautiful and so sad at the same time. A warm embrace to you Perin1973.

    • Levi says:

      05:58pm | 30/11/10

      And people wonder why the birth rates of Western countries are declining except among immigrant communities. Being single and building a career means absolutely nothing once you have kids of your own.

      Reply

    • TheJester says:

      07:36pm | 02/12/10

      I just read back over all the comments and its seems except for one or two most have missed the point of this article. Its strange that they see you as either complaining about being single (which your not) or saying your too young to get married and enjoy being single. Sorry but since when did being in a relationship have anything to do with a white fence, 2.5 kids and dog? LOL The opposite of single is NOT married.

      I totally understand what your saying. I’m 20 myself and it seemed as soon as I turned 16 everytime I saw family or family friends they’re questions would be “hi, how are you? hows school? do you have a boyfriend yet?” at every gathering. They never used to ask me about boys before but every since that age, its all I get when I see certian people. Just like you I’m happy alone, but its not hard to feel like shit when everytime you get asked that and have to say no to that question. And its annoying aswell that they can’t find anything to talk to me about other than my relationship status. Its also annoying when people equate single as looking or single as desperate and try to hook you up but I wont get into that.

      I think you’d agree that the world and media focus on people being in relationships too much. Nearly every movie and television show from home and away to my girl is based around peoples relationships, sex and love in some form. Most songs are written about being either in love or out of love. When ever you go to a party or event your expected to bring a date, not just a friend as a +1. Open any edition of Cleo or Dolly and the magazines whole focus is about looking good for guys, trying to meet a guy, making your guy happy in bed…. the list goes on. There is hardly anything about telling girls that you don’t need a man, that this isn’t the fifties your okay as you are so put that makeup down. You have to figure that out yourself, many girls don’t see that.

      Its sad that there are girls out there that feel this pressure to be in a relationship and couple up. You know those girls that need to be with someone all the time, that can’t stay single. I had a friend once that would get out of a relationship and would be in another one within a fortnight. It was like to her being single was the worst state to be in she couldn’t last even a month without a partner. Maybe like most of society seems to think, she thought being young and single means you are a lesser person and not ‘whole’. (Don’t know what that makes me if she has had more relationships than I can remember and I haven’t had one LOL).

      Anyways don’t listen to the comments that told you that you shouldn’t be writing on this site, keep up the good work! Cheers!

      Also while I was reading this article it reminded me of a book I discovered recently that you might be interested checking out. The books called Quirky Alone by Sasha Cagen and her whole concept is really cool.  According to their website Quirky Alone is a word used to describe” a person who enjoys being single (or spending time alone) and so prefers to wait for the right person to come along rather than dating indiscriminately”.

      Reply
 
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