Naked cartwheels, foot spas for toddlers and a board game that teaches youngsters the ins and outs of the drug trade.

Some boards not as innocent as they may first appear. Picture: Bob Finlayson.

It’s been another varied week in the quirky world of local newspapers.

When an 80-year-old Adelaide woman found a board game on her front lawn, quite naturally she gave it to her grandson.

Unfortunately for grandma, the Monopoly-style game pits players against each other to buy hydroponic set-ups, before harvesting and selling the drug.

The charming game also makes reference to prostitution, sadomasochism, strippers, armed robbery, eye-gouging and “savagely attacking” women.

It was dumped in front of about 40 homes last month by the game’s makers, who carried out a similar stunt in 2007.

But while the future of drug dealing in Adelaide seems assured, I’m not sure how tough the next generation of Sydney-siders will be.

Children as young as two attending a Lower North Shore day care centre can now look forward yoga, meditation and foot spas.

And because it would be simply awful, darling, not to look the part, the kids can also have their hair and nails done.

Now, I don’t remember it clearly, but I’m fairly sure playschool for me involved eating, fighting and crying.

The times they are a-changin’.

Staying in Sydney, one man who could certainly use a relaxing spa treatment is a Hornsby homeowner seeing red over some infuriating council bureaucracy.

Robbie Gers was feeding his six-month-old baby when a 7kg bunya nut crashed through his roof, narrowly missing the pair.

It had dropped from an overhanging tree, which the council is now refusing to remove for aesthetic reasons.

They say he must stump up $7000 to de-nut the tree, or just put up with the occasional near-death experience.

Seems reasonable?

Flying nuts could also be found over in Western Australia when two men were arrested for doing naked cartwheels outside a pub.

Egged on by pals, the pair put on a 4.15am gymnastics show for patrons at the Stage Door Bar and Brasserie.

The agile nudists were fined $200 each by a magistrate, who said the financial penalty would “take some of the fun out of it”.

But not all of the fun, mind.

And finally this week, a Melbourne clairvoyant has been named Victorian Psychic of the Year by her industry association.

Maureen Perry claims to have been seeing things others couldn’t since the age of five but was still surprised by the award.

“It was all a bit out of the blue,” the psychic said, immediately raising questions about the quality of the competition.

Most commented

11 comments

Show oldest | newest first

    • Albie says:

      11:27am | 18/02/10

      Clairvoyants have an industry association?!

    • Gerard Oosterman says:

      12:10pm | 18/02/10

      I might get converted to suburbs eventually. On the way again to our daughter’s leavy suburb and at the turn off from the M5 we decided to count people walking on the street.

      After arrival at the daughter’s house which is 7 km drive amongst typical suburban back streets we counted 7 people on the street.

      We could not have possibly kept up counting cars. Unfortunately people in cars don’t communicate much with others accept perhaps with the middle finger pointed upwards, if one is lucky.

      Ah, the sipping of a coffee on the veranda. I can’t get enough of that. Let’s have a veranda sipping day.
      http://oosterman.wordpress.com/

    • david says:

      12:13pm | 18/02/10

      Clairvoyant association ousted because it couldnt see that all people think its a crock!

      The association has been replaced with the Order of Sceptical Bastards

    • Blindside Bill says:

      02:03pm | 18/02/10

      Clairvoyants form an industry association. You know I just knew that would happen.

    • Matt says:

      02:22pm | 18/02/10

      I’m reminded of the tale of the former editor of The Sun, Kelvin McKenzie, who sacked the paper’s astrologer by letter which began, of course:

      “As you will no doubt have foreseen…”

    • T.Chong says:

      03:42pm | 18/02/10

      Would a clairvoyant need a ring tone ?

    • Stefano says:

      03:36pm | 18/02/10

      And the ad in the public notices column saying the monthly clairvoyants’  meeting has been cancelled due to unforeseen circmstances.

    • Gerard Oosterman says:

      03:43pm | 18/02/10

      There is hope for all of us.
      The whipper snipper brigade has calmed down. Just hope we will have a few days or even weeks of peace in suburbia before the leaf blowers come out in force.
      In Australia The suburban tales are more often told through noisy petrol driven garden devices than through communication by mere people.

      Even so, we counted 16 people walking through suburbia today, within 30 minutes of driving too!
      http://www.abc.net.au/unleashed/stories/s2815728.htm

    • Caz says:

      07:48am | 19/02/10

      Hahaha! This article made me laugh thanks Jon!

    • Sceptic says:

      10:36pm | 25/02/10

      Psychic Associations that protect their own industry more like it. If you get all the psychics to vote for one of their own then it legitimizes the industry, right? Wrong. It’s a way of getting the media to buy into this crap.

    • Mabel22Blevins says:

      08:27pm | 12/07/11

      If you are willing to buy real estate, you would have to receive the credit loans. Furthermore, my mother usually utilizes a college loan, which seems to be really fast.

 

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