A “symptom of recovery” from smoking addiction is the hilarious excuse for ministerial forgetfulness from a support group for people trying to beat the butt.

Assistant Treasurer Nick Sherry got himself in a minor twist yesterday on national television when he wrongly – and repeatedly – said the forecast unemployment rate was 8 per cent rather than the recently revised lower figure of 6.75.
His spokesman blamed ill-health, saying the Senator had experienced withdrawal symptoms since giving up smoking. Support group Smokenders told the Sydney Morning Herald that “quitting cold turkey often led to a cough in the first few days and forgetfulness in the first few weeks.”
This raises a terrifying prospect in this quitting season – if ministers can trip up on key economic statistics, can cold-turkey bus drivers forget to brake? Can pilots omit to, say, lower the wheels before landing?
To be fair Australia’s unemployment data has been the most confusing and expert-confounding figure of them all, in this post-GFC era in which “economic forecasting” is regarded on the continuum of precision as somewhere between crystal-ball gazing and a game of pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey.
The minister later took “full responsibility” for the error, but I have to say I can sympathise. Some ex-smokers I know - including two people who work in the chaotic and confronting world of acute hospitals - say quitting is the hardest thing they have ever done in their life, and I believe them.
For a heavy smoker, the physical and mental effects of prolonged nicotine deprivation are an incomparable horror. For me it results in cold sweats, headaches, and a barely-controllable urge to punch a nearby wall just to have something to do with my hands. All I can think about is a cigarette. Catch me at the end of a long-haul flight and I’ll struggle to tell you what year it is, never mind the revised unemployment forecast from the Mid-Year Financial Outlook.
I got very close to giving up completely once, back in the mid-90s while at university. Over three months I cut down from a pack a day to a few puffs of an ultra-light, once in the morning, and once in the evening. It all came undone after exams when, before getting on a flight to New York with friends, I had a couple of full-strengths and then ended up rolling down Broadway that night with a cigarette in one hand - and a fat cigar in the other.
Since then I’ve made a few half-hearted attempts to quit but was never resolved enough.
To anyone, including Senator Sherry, who is trying to give up at the moment: keep it up. It may be the hardest thing you ever do, but you’d imagine it will surely be among the best.
Good luck.
Facebook Recommendations
Read all about it
Punch live
Up to the minute Twitter chatter
@nigelmcbain I don't see the nexus between gay marriage and gay sex education in schools. ACL does. Health issues should be taught whatever
@jennijenni a few companies are known to do that - ask for story ideas from job applicants so they can steal them later
: Bruce Springsteen: "I get roughed up crowdsurfing… people try to pull chunks out of me" http://t.co/jiHqt8agt9” it was him, @patricklion
Recent posts
The latest and greatest
The Punch is moving house
Good morning Punchers. After four years of excellent fun and great conversation, this is the final post…
Will Pope Francis have the vision to tackle this?
I have had some close calls, one that involved what looked to me like an AK47 pointed my way, followed…
Advocating risk management is not “victim blaming”
In a world in which there are still people who subscribe to the vile notion that certain victims of sexual…
Nosebleed Section
choice ringside rantings
From: Hasbro, go straight to gaol, do not pass go
Tim says:
They should update other things in the game too. Instead of a get out of jail free card, they should have a Dodgy Lawyer card that not only gets you out of jail straight away but also gives you a fat payout in compensation for daring to arrest you in the first place. Instead of getting a hotel when you… [read more]From: A guide to summer festivals especially if you wouldn’t go
Kel says:
If you want a festival for older people or for families alike, get amongst the respectable punters at Bluesfest. A truly amazing festival experience to be had of ALL AGES. And all the young "festivalgoers" usually write themselves off on the first night, only to never hear from them again the rest of… [read more]Gentle jabs to the ribs
Superman needs saving
Can somebody please save Superman? He seems to be going through a bit of a crisis. Eighteen months ago,… Read more
Most commented