Everyone’s favourite chicken shop (for anyone born after 1992, KFC stands for Kentucky Fried Chicken) has, very surprisingly, branched out into smoothie production.

Obviously, there was a gap in the smoothie market and fried chicken, hot chips and a banana smoothie, or “krusher,” a KFC coined term, really is a winning combo.

Lick it, bite it, taste it, suck it, the hot guys and girls from the sleek TV adverts licking the “real bitz,” off their hands and fingers encourage us to buy, buy, buy.

KFC Krushers are “full of real bitz,” apparently. And great to chuck at a hot chick in short shorts with a swinging baseball bat, if you take advertising seriously.

Matt Preston was probably unavailable on the day of filming, but Colonel Sanders was licking his fingers long before he hit our screens.

In a blatant assault on the English language, Krushers come in a “Kookies and Kream” flavour. There is also a Karamel Krunch Krusher, I kid you not. But the kids are loving it (pardon the fast-food pun.) I also heard they were planning to introduce Zinger thick shakes. Okay, now I am kidding.

According to a recent article in The Australian, KFC will spend more than $35 million on its biggest menu change in over 10 years, and potentially millions more advertising it.

These new, “healthy”, options have little to do with KFC’s concern for our waistlines, and a lot to do with dollar signs.

The youth market has an enviable disposable income to spend on just about anything they please, and apparently the youth of today really fancy smoothies. I mean Krushers. Sorry. When I was a kid, we just drank water.

When McDonalds recently dominated the annual children’s food marketing Fame and Shame Awards, I was surprised that KFC earned no mention for their Krushers marketing campaign.

Although McDonalds did put up tough competition, eventually named the “worst irresponsible creator of food promotions” in three out of four categories, surely KFC’s blatant repackaging of fruit inspired ingredients into a nutritionally void substance should have earned a kick in the pants by the 200+ members of the Parents Jury, an online network of parents so obsessed by what goes into their children’s mouths they have annual awards to wag their fingers at fast food outlets for their marketing propaganda towards children.

These Krushers are not just smoothies (so, like, last year), they are a premium product directed at a premium audience, and fast food brands have very clever marketing departments.

KFC’s advertising directed towards adults promotes healthy eating, and their advertising towards children and teenagers promotes sexy, sugary and fried. It makes perfect sense to me.

We can’t deny that youth spending power is a big business. So if you order a KFC Krusher and you don’t like it, don’t blame KFC, blame yourself for being susceptible to sneaking marketing techniques.

And if you order a KFC Krusher and you do like it… shouldn’t you be in school right now?

3 comments

Show oldest | newest first

    • KL says:

      12:59pm | 23/11/09

      Seriously…get over it. It’s clear that you have a major problem with KFC but you do have a choice. No one will ever go to KFC if they are seeking healthy food choices and most intelligent consumers know that Boost Juice etc isn’t very good for you either. You actually think that people are going to expect the cookies and cream/caramel drinks to be healthy?
      The fact is, people know what they’re consuming when they go to KFC and it comes down to choice.
      And if you did your research correctly, you would realise that the new “healthier” option is actually grilled chicken, not the Krushers.

      Please don’t insult our intelligence with articles like this.

    • Eric says:

      04:52pm | 23/11/09

      The headline of this article is very stupid.

      People are not mindless automatons controlled by advertising. If they were, you would be one too.

      Try to think a bit.

    • Tyler says:

      11:14am | 11/12/09

      Another marketing student that thinks the right attitude is the most negative one. You win no points for originality – you are just another self indulgent social commentator that thinks slagging off wealthy and successful corporations means you are alternative and fantastic. Let me guess ... you buy free trade coffee, take a green bag to Woolworths and intend on protesting against the Bell Bay pulp mill but seem to always conveniently forget to go, and this is what helps you feel like a socially and environmentally conscious citizen? What a crock. Go away.

 

Facebook Recommendations

Read all about it

Punch live

Up to the minute Twitter chatter

Anthony Sharwood

Dementor doing a good job for sweden #sbseurovision

Anthony Sharwood

Ukraine song pinches chord progression from The Verve's Bittersweet Symphony. Fo real #sbseurovision

Anthony Sharwood

RT @GerardDaffy: @antsharwood all the talk over there is the grannies will win.they entered to get a church built,feelgood story

Anthony Sharwood

These peole insult my grandmothjer, who was born in minsk, belarus #sbseurovision

Recent posts

The latest and greatest

Abbott’s crass logic: trash the Parliament in order save it

Abbott’s crass logic: trash the Parliament in order save it

An email was sent to almost every politician in Australia this week saying that someone should cut off…

Our special forces don’t always need special treatment

Our special forces don’t always need special treatment

We admire them, but we’re not entirely sure why. We allow them to operate in the shadows; we rarely…

A good holiday is about unrest, not rest

A good holiday is about unrest, not rest

Like a fat full-stop, it lay in my hand. A small orange – not exactly fresh, but purchased anyway…

Nosebleed Section

choice ringside rantings

From: They must pay for one’s bitter disappointments

Michael S says:

"A teacher at Geelong Grammar had criticised her for using words that were too long, which had left her confused and had made her doubt her ability to write essays. She became ''quite distressed'' when her English marks began to fall." I can sympathise. My scholastic mentors conveyed to me a causal relationship… [read more]

From: Welfare for breeders is a bonus for everyone

Change Up! says:

I have no problem paying my taxes. As a single, childless person on a very decent income, I can afford it and not have my life severely altered. Plus I understand that my taxes paying for things like schools, childcare and infrastructure is ultimately a good thing. A better community is better for me… [read more]

Gentle jabs to the ribs

They must pay for one’s bitter disappointments

They must pay for one’s bitter disappointments

A private school girl’s family is sueing her elite, extremely expensive private school for not… Read more

243 comments

Newsletter

Read all about it

Sign up to the free daily Punch newsletter