In your dreams: sex siren’s brush with very liberal Greek

Let’s be fair dinkum here: there is an opportunistic, advantage-taking, “let’s-talk-about-this-somewhere-quieter-where-no-one-can-hear-us” shiftiness that is common both to the Greek and political make-up.

DISCLAIMER: I compare these two because the arrogance of power of those in politics and the general over-confidence of a culture such as that of the Greeks. It can be a very alluring yet publicly fatal mix.

On Wednesday night I was one of the special guests and hosts of the Mid Winter Ball in our nation’s capital. It is “the” event on the Canberra calendar. The most glamorous event in Australian politics.

The fact that Therese Rein wore a sleeveless backless dress was not the only thing that every one was talking about.

What developed that night was a dangerous cocktail involving a Greek man - Anthony Scrinis, some unsuspecting women, too much alcohol and quite a lot of inappropriate groping.

Unfortunately, poor Effie was implicated in this web of intrigue and inappropriateness due to two factors: geography and geography.

The first geographical factor was that I was asked at the beginning of the night to pose in the foyer of the Great Hall at Parliament House. After some solitary shots of the stunning moi, that same man - the aforesaid culprit, sauntered over and stepped into in a photo alongside me.

Why wouldn’t he? Exactly.

Unfortunately, it was that photo that made it to page four of Friday’s Daily Telegraph. Spewing badly.

Personally if we were the picture editor at the Telegraph and I was looking for comedy I would have run with the shot of Bronwyn Bishop and her date - Tim Shaw the Demtel man. Classic. But obviously comedy wasn’t the motivator.

The second geographical factor was the one involving a country called Greece. Genetically and culturally we are both from there and that’s when the association becomes a convenient one. Talk about cut and a half.

The only reason why I feel slightly responsible for the ensuing events is because I was the first to shun Anthony Scrinis’ crack-on moves. Needless to say that if he’d actually gone the grope for one of my puppies on the night – which by the way were not on show in the least – he would not be alive to tell the tale, let alone resign. Years of elite bitch-fighting would have seen to that.

Just quietly, it’s become apparent that women’s issues were not the only women’s things he was working on that night.

I understand the need to help those we feel a connection to - as K-Rudd knows first hand since the Ozcar situation has erupted.

Sophie Mirabella, ex-Panopoulos, was trying to give a dog a bone so to speak. She was trying to help along someone from the old country. Give a leg up to a fellow wog if you hear me knocking. I get it all - I’m saying is that sometimes it’s high risk.

An over zealous, ambitious, out-of-his-depth Greek man like Scrinis whose been in politics for five minutes is going to have trouble denying himself access to free food and, more’s the point, free alcohol.

I must admit I do feel slightly guilty because it has become apparent that it was my chilly “never in a million years – let alone in your dreams” knockback coupled with the free booze, that sent Scrinis on a lecherous rampage.

Come on, what’s a picky girl to do? It’s obvious now he was spewing well before the alcohol finished him off.

Of course, there is no excuse for Scrinis behaving like such a tool, the blame must be shared by those who should have seen this coming. Who in their right mind thought that by inviting gorgeous me to the Ball, that any man there could control themselves, let alone an inexperienced eager beaver with no sense of appropriateness?

I mean there has been so many stellar Greeks in Australian politics, including Arthur Sinidinos and Gough Whitlam, who have tried to crack on to me at one point or another, to no avail, but at least they did it with class. Seriously what chance in the world did a poor drunk Greek called Anthony have?