ICB: Can you have a Nude Olympics with clothes?
Welcome to a stripped back I Call Bullshit, where we look at spin and scuttlebutt. Today, nudity. I admire other people who have the guts (or don’t, as the case may be) but am not that keen on it for myself. So you can all relax.
And it’s great that South Australia has a nudist beach – Maslin’s – that also happens to be a spectacular spot, and it’s excellent that after a five-year hiatus they’ve brought back the Nude Olympics, a change to jiggle your way to fun and infamy.
But what a crying shame that kids have to keep their clothes on to “deter pedophiles”.
A warning like that almost makes things seem dodgy when they weren’t. It casts a dark cloud over the innocent fun. It saps the innocence.
Police told organisers that it was “appropriate to advise that children wear bottoms to deter any untoward behaviour”.
OK, so it’s their job to be overprotective, and parents are naturally overprotective and so we end up with this paranoid idiocy. What do you say to a little kid, whose natural state is being in the nuddy, when that kid asks why they have to wear pants when none of the adults do?
Olympics organiser Debbie Pillar was on the radio this morning talking about how the move was necessary because there were just more pedophiles around than there used to be. ICB. There aren’t more. We’re just hyperaware.
And so everyone worries about the man down at the playground with or without kids when they should be more worried about a priest or a teacher or a family friend.
This all leads to this helicopter parenting, kids not being allowed to walk to school until they’re on a zimmer frame, fewer outings to the local park, and an atmosphere of fear that must, somehow, percolate into a kid’s subconscious.
If police really are concerned, there are other ways they can protect kids, surely. There’s already a ban on non-official photography. It’s not Bondi down there, it’s controllable.
Parents, all adults down there for the games, surely, would have their eagle eyes out anyway for any “untoward behaviour” and could quickly and easily alert others.
Having a Nude Olympics then insisting kids wear clothes is bullshit. It’s throwing the innocent baby out with the seawater.
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