I saw myself plastered and it wasn’t pretty

Old Clive says:

08:41am | 30/09/09

When I decided to give up the booze and keep my mates, I drank Claytons,
{ this was before they started advertising}, when I heard their speech becoming slurred and their voices becoming louder and their thought paterns deteriorating, I finally had to give up my mates, because I knew there was real future in the pastime. I went to an AA meeting once to see what they did and the result was that I found out I was an alcohlic at 22 years of age and I didn’t know it.

Dee from Syd says:

09:18am | 30/09/09

I love this article!!  Why isn’t this on the front page of news.com.au so that everyone can read it and not just the few that get past that
It is so true that we never really know how we look until we see someone else….hence the reason why I rarely drink past the legal limit of driving
A few drinks is good but really, do you want to continue waking up to not knowing what you did, or wondering how stupid you were the night before….

T says:

09:52am | 30/09/09

I had to give up drinking a few years ago for health reasons.  I remember going out with my friends sober for the first time, stopping half way through the night and thinking…‘s#@*....my friends are total wankers!’...something that had been lost on me beforehand, when was no doubt being a drunk wanker as well.  Very good article…it is the same ‘ladies’ who tut and shake their heads at other ‘drunk slappers’, who often go out and behave in that exact same way, can’t handle their alcohol and the night usually ends up in tears, vomit or a one night stand….or sometimes a combination of all three!

Chris says:

10:17am | 30/09/09

To me,working in hospitality is the mirror that Lucy talks about. The best NYE’s have been when I was working. Sure you have a good night out but it starts at 3.00 am when you close up and head off for a few drinks - at 6.00 am there are plenty of taxis and the yobs are long gone.
My delightful memory of the decline of a good night was serving drinks in the early 90’s to a group of four girls (early twenties) - nice attractive girls, no attitude just out for fun. It started with the obligatory Champers (toast to a great night). The slippery slide started with the shooters - 4 B-52’s, 4 more, 4 QuickF$%ks, 4 more and so on. The rot had set in. By the end of the night, one girl had caught the eye of a young lad and was enjoying his company to say the least. Another girl was jealous and started a fight with the first girl - this ended in tears with her friend taking the last of the four to the toilet so she could be sick. They had all left by 11.30 pm. Another night in paradise.

r says:

10:42am | 30/09/09

My late gran once told me that as a young newly wed she and my grandad went out for dinner with friends and shared a bottle of wine. At the next table were a similar group of friends, but one or two of the women were pissed and making absolute fools of themselves in the restaurant.
Grandma swore that she would never allow herself to get drunk because there’s nothing more unattractive than a drunk woman acting like an oaf.
This story has stuck with me for many years and I continue to get turned off by women who think they have to destroy their braincells and behave like men at a rugby game in order to meet men and/or have a good time on the town…
Girls, the opposite is true!

SportLuxe says:

11:24am | 30/09/09

Great article and so true - but it also proves that no matter what advertising, education or increased taxes are implemented, people won’t change…as Lucy said, she’ll be ‘back on the wagon’ in a week.

In regards to the correlation between being unable to have a good time without imbibing too much alchohol, it seems we all have the memories of Goldfish.

Or was that a shooter I had on the weekend…..?

Jade says:

11:24am | 30/09/09

hahaha, I don’t think you even need to see a person drunk to be like “whoa, I am really like that”.  Just the memories or the stories the next day are enough for me to be turned off,  but then I wonder why oh why do I keep doing it…....

My turning point where I realised that I should never be so drunk that i can’t remember the night was when i was told i was dancing with a broom…....

Sarah says:

11:59am | 30/09/09

I recently took part in the Bridge to Brisbane which required participants to assemble at the starting point by approx 6:30. Regular trains were running from the Valley (Bris equivalent to Kings Cross) so at 5 in the morning we walked through the valley to the Train Station and this was a very sobering experience indeed. I cringed a little looking around at the mess of the Valley on a Sunday morning. If the government showed us how we really looked- messy hair, completely dishelveled, missing shoes, one earring, how the night we thought was so amazing involved walking through crap, broken glass and who knows what else they may have a little more success combatting alcohol related incidents. As it stands 5am on a sunday morning only served to strengthen my new found theory that nothing good comes from being out after 12pm!

Campbell says:

12:09pm | 30/09/09

Everyone loves to bemoan their big nights when their heads are aching the day after, but I think what Lucy’s covered well is that it’s just a hell of a lot of fun. Pure and simple - everyone’s more interesting after a few (a few too many?) drinks.

That’s why she’ll be back on the wagon soon, I’ll be making a fool of myself at Parklife this weekend and those girls on the train are covering their mysterious bruises with foundation for another great night out on the town.

shabangabang says:

12:18pm | 30/09/09

I actually cannot remember the last time I let myself get that messy. Must have been good though.
I do drink socially but hate the feeling of being out of control so don’t let myself get to that point.
Turning point came after a pub crawl with my sis got out of control. Wine + beer + pizza + joint = horrible horrible mistake.

E says:

12:36pm | 30/09/09

Alcohol is degrading, it reduces our humanity until we sway and gibber like apes, and make decisions which even apes would be embaressed by (right girls?).

Anyone who thinks getting drunk is ‘fun’ has a problem, because it shows that drinking has become and end in itself, rather than an enhancer or ice breaker.

I stopped drinking a few years ago when I realised that every stupid, cringeworthy act i had ever committed, the things which really make you shrink inside, were fueled by booze. I had lost good friends because they figured this out earlier, and now people I used to call friends (really drinking partners) are aquaintences.

The alcohol industry has powerfull lobbiests and marketing teams who are willing to make a proift off the degredation of their fellow human beings, anyone who promotes alcohol as anything but a disinfectant is a victim of their work.

John A Neve says:

12:47pm | 30/09/09

E says “alcohol is degrading”, not so. We, for the most part, degrade ourselves. Never blame others or items for your own lack of self control.
One of the facets of the Nanny State, is never accepting blame, it’s always the fault of some one or thing else.

Gav says:

01:05pm | 30/09/09

The girls become uglier 1000X when they whack a cancer stick in the mouth.
eeeeww yuck!!!

Campbell says:

01:14pm | 30/09/09

E: It’s only degrading if you act in a way that is degrading. If you were committing stupid and cringeworthy acts under the influence of alcohol isn’t it an issue of your own self-control?

Personally, I think I’m awesome when I’m drunk. Getting drunk *is* fun, but it’s a silly ad hominem attempt to say that if you have fun when you’re drunk you can’t have fun when you’re sober.

It’s very defeatist and conspiratorial to blame the lobbyists and marketers for your own shortcomings, and moreso calling those who enjoy drinking “victims” is insulting—you should ask the multitude of people - Ms Carter and myself included - who can have a drink, get drunk, get smashed and still come out of it smiling the next day.

Eleanor says:

01:42pm | 30/09/09

I happen to think I’m a tolerable drunk. I don’t get too shrill, because even when I’m pissed as a newt I think it’s annoying. I do, however, have a penchant for making wildly inappropriate jokes, which then in turn cause the shrill screeching from my fellow inebriated friends, and buying endless rounds of tequila shots. I’m a bit like the friend your mamma said you couldn’t hang around with anymore in highschool.

Mel says:

02:15pm | 30/09/09

Eleanor… you are exactly what this page is about.. you just can’t (and don’t want to) see it yet!

William Colvin says:

02:17pm | 30/09/09

Recently I’ve given up going out.
After too many nights of realising I’d spent $50 for nothing more than 4 hours of boredom, a bad taste in my mouth and a slowly growing headache, I’ve been 3 weeks sober.
Of course, I’ve replaced one vice with another and I’m mildly ashamed to admit that I now spend those nights “raiding” with my “guild” in World of Warcraft.
Oh, the horrors of the modern age…

Michael says:

02:32pm | 30/09/09

Careful about drinking and online gaming, you can still make a tit out of yourself there in front of just as many people lol *blushes from guilt*

Mark says:

02:35pm | 30/09/09

There’s only one thing that is worse than a bad drunk, and thats the ex-drinker who feels the need to run around telling anything with ears how great they are for giving up the booze (same goes for ex-smokers, vegetarians…etc). I have met some great friends, business contacts and really interesting people on boozy nights out, and I can’t see how going to a movie or having coffe with a friend could ever provide that sort of access to new and exiting people in my life. Well done to all those who have given up drinking (I’m sure you had YOUR OWN reasons for doing so), but don’t try to take the moral high ground against those of us who have the self control to drink without making a fool of ourselves.

A says:

02:40pm | 30/09/09

Its about social norms.  Whilst in South Africa, I drank a lot, more than I’d ever drunk before or since.  Beer with lunch, Beer after work, pre dinner mixers, wine with the meal, post dinner mixers, then going out to drink.  About 5 days a week.  However, the culture (at least with the group of friends of my uncle) was to get drunk was a social faux pas.  So basically drink, upto happy level, then stay at the happy level, never go over, else you don’t get invited to the next party.  Here, getting blind is fine.  Fix that in our society, drinking to happy only, then you don’t become obnoxious, bait, or bruised.

EricLeMoose says:

02:49pm | 30/09/09

In the future, there will be a drinking licence, by which you would be put through certain situations in some form of virtual reality manner at various degrees of intoxication. A prospective drinker’s reaction to events such as how they handle a harsh word, a knockback from a bouncer, a spilled drink from a fellow patron, a break-up etc would be measured.
If you don’t become what is regarded as a tool, pain in the butt or danger to others - whether through violence or just being annoying - you will be allowed to drink.
Those who do not qualify to drink, will be spared potential embarassment, relationship breakdowns and have the opportunity at a fruitfull career as a taxi driver, bar tender, chef or any other occupation people conduct while others are having fun.
This is my dream.
Now I’m off to have the first of several beers with my friends - and hopefully some strangers.

Moi says:

03:05pm | 30/09/09

Reading this makes me think that it’s such a shame that REALLY enjoying a few sav blancs, engaging in debauched dance-offs, making ‘bad’ jokes to friends and stealing your mate’s camera to take pics of another drunken friend’s punani, are frowned upon so widely. I mean, that’s what friends are for.

When ever I have that ‘cringe’ factor from the night before, I turn to a friend that’s done worse then me in the past. Like the one who did a runner from a taxi outside her house where she then took refuge, or the bloke that woke up the following morning next to his second cousin… youch.

I agree with Mark too, drinking with people and old friends can open up a whole other side of people you may otherwise never see. But ultimately I am with you Lucy, enjoying more time on the sober side of the fence. Except of course on special occasions like my mate’s hen’s party in the Cross on the weekend. Maybe I passed you?!

spider says:

03:21pm | 30/09/09

I stopped drinking after the federal election in 2007.  I was refused entry to a really crappy George St pub - Bar Ace, anyone remember it?  Anyway, I still go out to pubs with my friends, most of whom can handle their drink better than I ever did, but I don’t drink. I save heaps of money, I’m able to stay awake and lively longer and I feel less embarassed about myself the next day (occassionally I still make a fool of myself sober).

I agree that seeing other idiots out at night probably helped influence my decision, but unfortunately most people won’t see the forest for the trees - they’ll be too drunk and loud and self-absorbed to notice what’s really going on, and so it’s a bit of a Catch 22 that until you stop drinking for a bit you won’t realise that you really should stop drinking for a bit.

Bob H says:

03:42pm | 30/09/09

Nothings changed then, young persons buy lots of drink then pee or throw it all up down the pan much to the delight of the club owners.  Then they grow up and drink becomes less important as more meaningful experiences are discovered.  Some keep the frantic pace up for longer but risk becoming very dull sad old lonely alcoholics as their fellow revellors peel away.  As for the destructive wake the drink leaves - car wrecks, violence and mess it is all part of growing up and like young salmon some don’t make it.

Leah says:

04:01pm | 30/09/09

No, I think the education programs and anti-binge ads are good. Especially within schools. Who knows, if it weren’t for those programs, perhaps we’d have MORE sixteen year olds running around drunk.

I drink at parties, but only one or two. I don’t go clubbing. I have a friend who used to go out virtually every week and get drunk - by the time she was 20, she was over it. As she and I both say, we have equally as much fun without the alcohol. I honestly had a friend once ask me “how MUCH have you drunk??” when I hadn’t drunk a drop. We were high on life, laughter, friends, and overtiredness. We have fun drinking too many energy drinks and soft drink, kill ourselves laughing at the stupidity of our drunk friends, but all with the ability to snap out of it if we need to.

Oh and to Mark… how is Lucy getting the moral high ground on you? She freely admits she’s nowhere near given up alcohol or that she’s better. She’s just admitting what a tool she looks like (and other drunks look like) when she’s drunk, and perhaps she’ll be just a tad more careful in future. I think it’s a great idea. If you need to get drunk to make friends or have a good time, you have crappy friends and a sad existence.

Eleanor says:

04:27pm | 30/09/09

Mel says:01:15pm | 30/09/09

Eleanor… you are exactly what this page is about.. you just can’t (and don’t want to) see it yet!

Mel, come have a drink with me and then pass comment. My shout

Mark says:

04:51pm | 30/09/09

Leah - I was not addressing Lucy with my comment, I was addressing those people writing on this blog (such as yourself) who feel the need to big note themselves for being non-drinkers. I think your comment perfectly demonstrates what I was talking about - “If you need to get drunk to make friends or have a good time, you have crappy friends and a sad existence”. You are clearly passionate about not drinking (alcohol anyway… keep smashing those caffene / taurine drinks) but don’t start preaching “my life is better than yours” as it is really not cool.

David C says:

05:05pm | 30/09/09

Dont you think it funny how bars and pubs stop serving people that are drunk? I mean what other industry discriminates against its best customers?

Ben Gray says:

07:57pm | 30/09/09

“Instead work out some way to get people to see exactly what they look like when pissed.” - Dear God, they’ve been running ads like that for ages.
It’s not the government’s fault if you thought that a message of responsible drinking was for someone else.
Don’t call on the government to ask you to behave better. Those girls on the train probably think the government’s ads are for ‘other people’ too. They probably won’t learn their lessons until it bites them in the bum either.
And I love the author’s promise to get hammered again despite knowing better.
Why didn’t you just write “I was taught a lesson, and I choose not to learn it”. Article finished.

Sc says:

08:12pm | 30/09/09

Mark - I rarely drink, never had a hangover, never been into a club…on my 18th birthday my parents made me have a drink…  Obviously I think my life is better than yours otherwise I wouldn’t choose to live how I do (likewise you think your life is better than a nondrinker’s).  There’s nothing ‘uncool’ about stating an opinion on a forum, that’s what they’re for.  Wouldn’t it be boring if all commentors wrote the same thing??

Must admit though, you see some cringeworthy things being sober in the city on a Saturday night.

May says:

03:11am | 01/10/09

if its a sobering view to see yourself drunk, then why are you going to do it again? why do people need to lose chunks of their dignity? why do people need to drink to the point where they get off their face?

Jacky D says:

09:33am | 01/10/09

E says: “every stupid, cringeworthy act i had ever committed, the things which really make you shrink inside, were fueled by booze.”
Ditto. If there’s one thing I hope I can bang into my kids’ heads, this is it.

Danno says:

11:23am | 01/10/09

Getting hammered drunk rules. I know myself and my mates are complete wankers when blind, but so is everyone elseo when at a club etc so who is it really hurting.
My favourite is the next day reminiscing with the friends i’d gone out with trying to piece together the night.

Billy Pilgrim says:

11:45am | 01/10/09

Girls, take a dictaphone with you next time you head out for a drinking session and let it go for a couple of hours. If the calibre of the shrieking harpies one usually sees out on the town is anything to go by, you’ll be horrified.
I can’t stand how alcohol makes people think they’re far more hilarious than they are. I don’t drink much for this reason.

dancan says:

11:57am | 01/10/09

This is why I stopped drinking a few months ago…..and moved onto pills.

Michael says:

01:59pm | 01/10/09

You talk about drinking piss like its all good bro… its not. Some people can handle alcohol fine, after years of abuse and experience, just like how I am able to smoke 5 grams of weed in a night. I cannot drink alcohol at all though. My normal state of mind (being stoned), I am always calm, relaxed, paranoid, and think of every single cause and effect before I do something. When I’m drunk (I know my limit(3 beers)) I find it very hard to stop drinking, because I dont bother to think about results of actions, I dont care about others, and I look forward to abusing random people for laughs. This leads to me being a complete deadsh1t - very dangerous for myself and anyone else around - People need to understand that alcohol is a dangerous and poisonous DRUG that can lead to addictions and ruin lives. Weed, also a dangerous drug - I am so lazy and unmotivated to go out, I just sit at home smokin bongs, sexin, gamin, movies and eating food. I work fulltime in public service. I doubt id be able to hold down this position if I was an alco - ALCOHOL IS BAD - change the way the Australian society views alcohol - from a social drink to a drug, like all the other drugs - Drinkers, think twice before you call someone a druggie… because you are a druggie as well.

Dorian says:

02:51pm | 01/10/09

I don’t get it….I’ve been told I’m hilarious when I’m drunk!!!! The Pink Elephant can’t be wrong can he?

Billy Pilgrim says:

03:11pm | 01/10/09

You sound like me Michael, although I don’t smoke as much. Ironically the only times I’ve ‘needed’ to smoke to cope with facing the day has been when I was really hungover. Alcohol is not my friend, my tolerance for feeling like sh*t is just not that high.
Funny how you can come to work on Monday and say you drank yourself stupid on Friday and people mark that as a good wholesome weekend, but try saying you got stoned and necked a few pills and watch the silence drop like a stone.

Teetollar PotHead says:

04:39pm | 01/10/09

I hate drunks.  Drugo’s are easy to handle, but drunks have can’t think, can’t comprehend situations, can’t act proper when needed.  Hell I’ve seen people of LSD have more self control!  Alcohol is a really BAD DRUG!  Yet acording to the meaning of “Addicted” this women is ADDICTED TO A DRUG!  If someone smokes pot or takes and E or takes a line once a week, then they are called addicts who can’t control themselves.  BUT get totally plasted every weekend, send $100’s more than a drugo, get sick, act like a fool, cause trouble, start arguments, then say it’s not a drug addiction?  Huh?  People act like idiot when they allow drugs to control their lives, Alcohol is no different!  I’ve never seen a pot head spend $300 on pot in one weekend and have no memory of smoking it, they can remember smoking all of it, while the drunk just has a headack and no memory…  Gee who’s really the drug addict?  Alcohol is a bloody joke.

John Williamson says:

08:20am | 05/10/09

Teetolla Pothead - are you currently ripped?

D says:

07:34pm | 21/12/09

Very entertaining reading!! Michael & Teetolla pothead you are both pretty spot on.