Floats like a butterfly, stings like a Clive
More than anything right now, Australia needs leadership. We need clear policy direction, we need a leader that cares nothing for popularity, for political correctness, for playing the game.
In short, we need Clive Palmer. National Living Treasure. Bold visionary. Mr Palmer is not beholden to trendy ideas. He is unafraid to speak his mind, to cross swords with those from the left and the right.
What the world needs now is Clive, sweet Clive.
It’s so crazy, it might just work. Let’s take a look at the ways in which he could take the Liberal National Party if they were brave enough to elevate him to his rightful position.
The great impasse that is our national shame right now is asylum seekers. Our politicians bicker over respective offshore solutions while more come, sink, drown. The Greens stick to their pie-in-the-sky onshore processing ideals.
But Mr Palmer takes the debate to a different level.
Fly them in, he says. Despite Qantas’ woes it is still safer than a rickety boat – and despite various airlines charging tricky fees for providing toilets, water and oxygen, flying is still cheaper. Mr Palmer said:
We can say ‘you can buy a ticket if you believe you’re a refugee and you can come to Australia in normal transport at one tenth the cost. The ones that get here, allow them to be processed; the ones that are not legitimate, send them back on the next flight. What sort of a nation are we if we don’t follow our international responsibilities and allow people to come here safely?
We await the Greens ringing endorsement, as we also await further peripheral details on the pesky administration of such a scheme.
Lobbyists in the ranks
Mr Palmer has had a high-profile barney with Opposition Leader Tony Abbott over lobbyists on the party executive and potential conflicts of interest. Reportedly replete with obscenities, the two were “floating like butterflies and stinging like bees”. Such a chest thumping shows not only is he not afraid of authority but he is squeaky clean on the separation of secular power and political ambition.
The billionaire miner will announce next week whether he plans to take on Treasurer Wayne Swan in the seat of Lilley.
“It is just that some people may perceive a conflict of interest,” he said (in relation to his stance on lobbyists).
Again, with no vested interest to be seen, Mr Palmer is a vehement opponent of the carbon tax that kicked in over the weekend. Such opposition will clearly win him no friends in the voting public, and so must be indicative of his determination to choose truth over popularity.
He wants Prime Minister Julia Gillard to resign over carbon pricing, and believes it is unconstitutional. He is no slave to science and rails against the idea of climate change. A noble, friendless fight.
Finally, Mr Palmer is no nanny-stater. Not for him prescriptive campaigns on eating and drinking. Not for him the wowserism of current governments, the finger wagging on fat, the relentless condescension of two-and-five fruit and vegetable advertisements.
With his slavish scientific attachments, he knows the truth about red wine and cheese being the key to weight loss and health. With a clear condescension for endless CSIRO preaching about evidence bases and population studies, he has gone his own way and the proof is in the pudding - Mr Palmer says he has lost 40kg, is now only 122kg, and says people no longer see him as fat.
At the same time, he retains the respect and influence that fat brings:
They used to say I was fat but they’ve stopped saying that because I’ve lost weight and fat people across Australia have so much power they don’t know what they’re against. Maybe they might realise that by attacking fat people, myself and Gina Rinehart - not that I am saying she’s fat - it’s not working for them.
There are more fat people in Australia than skinny ones. When they started attacking fat people Julia Gillard was at a 52 per cent approval rating. Now she’s somewhat less. That’s because fat people don’t like it. They’re all united by the one thing - food and fatness. God bless us.
God bless you, Mr Palmer. God bless you.
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