“If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.” - Abraham Maslow
I was driving through Sydney on Friday around midnight and found myself surrounded by cars filled with youngsters. I’ve never felt so conscious of my own space.
The drivers were like roosters standing over their nests: music pounding, windows down, making their presence felt. I glanced over at one or two of the drivers, their glares were nothing short of threatening. It was a distasteful blend of “I’m out on the town with the boys” and “If you stare at me again I’ll have you.”
I don’t remember being that angry when I used to go for a night out. The drivers looked a little over half my age, fuelled and fired up. Are they really angry or are they an exaggerated adolescent version of all of us? For various types of rage, it seems, are all the rage.
I read recently about a Scottish man who suffered severe head injuries at the hand of four teenagers between the ages of 13 and 17. Then there was the brutal story of the Canadian in Sydney who, while in his wheelchair, suffered an unprovoked attack at a train station – again by a group of youths.
What is the problem here? The stream of examples of violent attacks by youths - fatal knife attacks at schools, bullying, gang assaults – is scary and I doubt there is a parent out there who doesn’t shiver at the thought of what perils their kids might face as they drift away from their homestead.
But it’s not just our young, we’re hearing about violence across all age groups and it doesn’t have to be the alcohol, drug related or vicious fatal types that we see on the news everyday. Violence, rage and anger are everywhere and we’ve all experienced it at some level.
Recent reports show that one driver in four admits to committing an act of road rage. One in five say they have ended a relationship or friendship with someone because of how they behaved when they were angry. 71% of internet users admit to having suffered net rage and 50% of us have reacted to computer problems by hitting our PC.
The list goes on but more interesting than statistics is the types of rage we’re experiencing these days. Office rage, classroom rage, phone rage, road rage, queue rage, PC rage, air rage, shopping rage, pavement rage, lollipop rage. (Yes, lollipop rage - in the UK it has been reported that 1 in 10 lollipop ladies are a victim of abuse or violence.
Anger is a way of dealing with stressful situations, but these days it has become much more physical and violent. Why are we so stressed? We live longer, have more holidays and our lives are much more comfortable than ever before. On the flip side, our lives are much faster paced, demanding, results driven and nowadays we’ve come to expect things instantly, even a short wait can be exhausting and annoying – waiting has become stressful.
The recent fiasco on the F3 out of Sydney where motorists waited for hours to et out of the city highlights how our lives can be instantly attacked by stress – a 12 hour traffic jam challenges our every anxiety and I doubt there is anyone who could remain calm in such a situation. People have a right to be angry.
There is some evidence that stress has overtaken the common cold as the main reason for taking time off work. Where does that lead? Anxiety and depression are two common side-effects on top of sleepless nights. A sleepless night will leave anyone with a short fuse.
So if stress really is more prevalent then this is an unmet challenge for youths. I’ve heard the term, “Bad to the bone” and we all know somebody who we think is exactly that. While I believe it is true that there are those who have innate violent tendencies there are also those who are born into stressful environments, and possibly more stressful environments than there have been in the past, where violence and rage are acceptable means of expression.
Anger is everywhere and everyone has different ways of dealing with it, it can even be healthy. But violence isn’t. As reason slips away, so does the bigger picture and lives get ruined. Where will this leave our youth?
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