The breastfeeding debate has reared its controversial head again with news that the NSW public service had granted new mums 60 minutes per day, over and above their allocated meal breaks, to breastfeed or express milk in a private room furnished with a refrigerator for their exclusive use.

Women at a world-wide breastfeeding event in Paris, 2008.

It is hoped this measure will result in increased breastfeeding rates and allow women to continue providing their child with the optimal start in life after returning to work.

It would be wonderful if such well intentioned initiatives had the desired impact but sadly they are destined to fail as they do not address what is at the core of Australia’s deplorable breastfeeding rates; the selfishness of mothers.

It is simply much easier for women to disregard the advice of doctors and midwives and turn to formula.

We have known for years that breast is best but figures show that only 14% of Australian mothers are complying with the World Health Organisation recommendation that newborns be exclusively breastfed for the first six months. And more than 80% are not breastfeeding at all by 12 months.

It is estimated that 2-4% of women are unable to successfully breastfeed for medical reasons, for the rest it is a lifestyle choice and one that is made when the mother’s interests supersede that of the child.

The advantages of breastfeeding are universally acknowledged. Artificially produced alternatives don’t provide the level of nutrition nor the protective qualities that only breast milk contains, which is why breast milk banks have been set up for the benefit of premature babies.

Breastfeeding has been shown to reduce the incidence of a host of ailments such as ear infections, diarrhoea and respiratory complaints. Research also indicates that it has many long term benefits with breastfed children recording higher IQ scores and far less likely to be overweight or obese as adults.

So one would think that unless you want your children to grow up fat and stupid you would heed the advice of medical professionals and abide by the WHO guidelines. So why do so many quit breastfeeding in the first six months?

The simple answer is that breastfeeding exclusively is a heavy burden for mothers and for many it is one they refuse to bear.

Bottle feeding facilitates a great many freedoms that an exclusively breastfeeding mother is simply unable to enjoy.

It allows a mother to leave a child with another carer for longer than a couple of hours at a time without the onerous task of expressing sufficient milk, it allows stressed out mums to enjoy a drink or two or three without worrying about the effects on bub, it means that women can take the contraceptive pill, and they can share the all important night-time feeding duties with their partner whilst they get some much needed sleep.

Simply put bottle feeding has many charms that can be very tempting to an exhausted mother.
Breastfeeding rates are highest amongst educated and wealthy women whilst they are lowest amongst the socio-economically disadvantaged. Given the cost of formula, one would be forgiven for thinking that the reverse was true.

Successful women are more likely to persist with breastfeeding despite the many inconveniences. Perhaps these women more keenly feel the pressure to ‘do the right thing’ by their child for the pressure to breastfeed is applied as soon as a woman finds out she is pregnant.

Not only do doctors and midwives emphasise the importance of breastfeeding but it is talked about at length in prenatal classes. And yet Australian mums fail to do what they know is best for their child when women in countries as varied as Norway and Iran manage to achieve breastfeeding rates that far exceed what we manage in Australia.

Perhaps if we stopped sugar coating the real reasons behind our poor breastfeeding record then we could start finding ways to tackle this worthy health issue.

Feminists are quick to point the finger of blame at an unsympathetic male dominated society but the unpalatable truth is that it’s not chauvinistic male attitudes or outdated workplace practises that prevent women breastfeeding, it is simply mothers putting their own interests before that of their child. 30 years ago smoking and drinking when pregnant was the norm.

We now know the devastating effects that nicotine and alcohol can have on the foetus and such behaviour is frowned upon. In the future we might also frown upon those who can breastfeed but refuse to do so.

It is not all about choice; it should also be about what is best for the child.

259 comments

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    • kel says:

      11:06am | 18/10/11

      There are a lot of idiots on here,however i only read a few posts cause i was physically sick at some peoples stupidity…RHONDA,you are full of crap,mastitis is caused by being engorged with milk,i had it many many times and i know what causes it. You are pretty clever if it happened any other way,unless you had lots of milk then some time in the future lost your milk which i doubt. People are way too focussed on themselves are THEIR comfort,they seem to not care too much about their childs health or they believe (want to believe) that formula is not highly processed junk food rubbish that they are stuffing down their childs throat and claiming they did it cause their kid was just about to STARVE TO DEATH….SOOOOO DRAMATIC…and that they really needed to know how much their child was drinking(oh sorry i mean how much they forced them to drink cause the back of the can told them how many ml their child needs to have). You are fools !!!! . I don’t care if i offend anyone and on occasion when someone comes out with a load of rubbish like bottle feeders do,i have been known to say “it’s probably cause you were bottle fed” ...being pretty sure thats the case…then i hear about how them and their kids have NEVER EVER EVER been sick in their lives !!! lying,lazy,selfish bunch of nit wits !

    • Helen says:

      09:22am | 31/05/10

      Are people really still commenting on this stupid beatup?

    • Timmo says:

      08:51am | 17/05/10

      I think it’s great that women breastfeed their babies, and some of them feed the children for quite a long time. I sometimes see young women breastfeeding their babies in public and I think it is perfectly normal and also wonderful to see.

      When a baby is born the first thing after washing is to put the baby on his/her mothers breast and that is important to give the babe a good start in life. The Mothers Milk is very important as it gives the important nutrition and enzymes need to build the babies immune system and other facets of nourishment. All in all a good nutritious way to enter a very complex world.

      All Mammals feed their children from the breast and this is the correct nature of things. So ladies, don’t worry about the people who complain about it. To me it is the most wonderful event to behold in the life of a newborn and if done in public well what’s the problem!?.

      I think that breastfeeding is very important not only for the correct nutrients for baby but important also for the establishment of bonding with mother and in stability of Mental health for the future. Babies have to be fed when they demand food and it is perfectly natural for mum to feed by the breast wherever this demand is made. There should be more of it seen in Society and there maybe would be more acceptance and tolerance by others coming from seeing this natural process taking place. Providing there aren’t complications and distress for the mothers then it is the perfect natural method. Putting further stress on Mothers with negative opinions can create health problems for Mothers and babies. Now i don’t think that we all want that do we.?

    • Leigh says:

      11:16pm | 16/05/10

      Everybody needs to just chill out and do what works best for them. The benefits of breastfeeding are grossly overstated and recent studies have found that many of the stated benefits of breast milk over formula are incorrect (http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/721515).
      Yes, breast fed babies do have a higher IQ than non-breast fed. This is because a higher proportion of educated, professional women breast feed.

      Everyone needs to stop worrying. Your kids are going to be fine.

    • firsttimemum says:

      05:38pm | 16/05/10

      I chuckled as I read this article. Quite a few of the authors comments made it obvious she has never breastfed a child. The lack of attention to the difficulties of breastfeeding for working mothers, such as inappropriate space (would you prepare your food in the toilets?), lack of access to a powerpoint or refridgerator, unrealistic expectations by management, such as 5 or 10 minutes breaks for expressing and harrasment by collegues. Lack of attentiont o the difficulties that women go through to breastfeed, aside from the 2-4% who physically can not ( recurrent blocked ducts or mastitis, over and undersupply, breast refusal, attchment issues and cracked nipples, biting, emotional issues such as those associatied with pasted sexual trauma, etc etc.) The assertion that bottle feeding is more convenient - need I say more? I am very pro-breastfeeding and I breastfeed my 1 year old as per WHO recommendations (that beastmilk remain part of the infants diet until 2 years of age and beyond). But if a mother tells me that she has difficulties breastfeeding, I would never be so arrogant as to assume she is just selfish. The author may have to eat her words if she ever becomes a mother herself.

    • Rachel says:

      03:39pm | 12/05/10

      I just wanted to correct a couple of errors in Rita’s piece.

      First, breastfeeding is a lot more convenient than washing and sterilising bottles at all hours of the day and night.

      Secondly, it is possible to drink alcohol providing you’re prepared to pump and dump (a bit of an effort for the sake of having a few wines).

      Third, breast feeding women can use the contraceptive pill - there are low dose versions out there.

      I don’t think the low breast feeding rates are to do with ‘‘selfishness’‘. I think it’s more to do with a shameful lack of support and education.

      Thoughtless and ill-informed articles like Rita’s do not help.

    • firsttimemum says:

      05:42pm | 17/05/10

      Actually, the pump and dump advice is now outdated. Science moves so quickly, doesn’t it? It’s not advised to drink whilst breastfeeding, however the alcohol in your milk equals the alcohol in your bloodstream (regardless whether you pump and dump) so if you have one standard drink, for most women the alcohol content in their milk will be gone after an hour. That should save you some time and some pumping!

    • Deborah says:

      10:01am | 12/05/10

      I cannot get over the self righteous, judgemental attitudes of some mothers. As ‘sisters’, we should be accepting of one anothers’ differences and different physical and emotional needs. What is right for one mother will not necessarily be right for another.

      I breastfed my son for about three months, supplemented by formula because I didn’t produce sufficient milk. Whether this was due to medical reasons or the fact I was cycling for over an hour every day I don’t know. My son was then fed exclusively formula. I never saw breastfeeding as a bonding time, it was merely a duty neither pleasant nor unpleasant.

      And guess what? My son is now 12, sharp as a tack, very healthy and happy! As we have a very close bond, he often confides in me and our family love spending quality time together on a regular basis.

      I did not feel guilty bottle feeding and neither should any mother! In whatever way suits you and your family, look after your children because they are precious. IMO, a great mother does not come exclusively in one mould, we are all UNIQUE!!!!!!

    • Amanda says:

      11:12pm | 11/05/10

      After breast-feeding 2 children for over a year my third nearly died on breast milk! He was failure to thrive, undiagnosed CP and anaphylactic and formula literally saved his life! He put on a Kilo within a week of starting on it. It is ignorant and bigoted to say that ‘breast is always best’! It was highly unfashionable a couple of decades ago to breast-feed and whole generations were told NOT to breastfeed. These babies have grown up and now form the backbone of our society. Are we a nation of unhealthy morons? People are so caught up in the supposed ‘science’ that subjects which shouldn’t be an issue for everyday people become one. It’s ridiculous to think that anyone can say what’s best for any one baby or mother. Leave the breasts alone and find something more important to talk about!

    • Samantha says:

      08:19pm | 11/05/10

      This topic is regurgitated over and over again in articles such as this, womens magazines, current affairs programs etc . For crying out loud can we please stop these stupid debates.  It is not a COMPETITION of who is the supermum in the world - there is no true right or wrong . Breastfed or bottle - who cares!!!!! As long as the child and its parents are healthy, happy, destressed and sane that all that matters. STOP the criticism,  the guilt trips and just get on with the hard work of being a parent in these current times regardless of whether you are a stay at home mum or working mum. No one and nothing is perfect.

    • Over ignorant fools says:

      01:18pm | 11/05/10

      Rita have you any children? Ever tried to breastfeed? Ever had mastisis, bleeding cracked nipples to the extent where your infant is vomiting your blood? Low milk supply? An infant who screams nights and day and fails to thrive and steadily loses weight despite being constantly on the breast? Work in an office that is male dominated, sexist to boot and absolutely no opportunity to express while at work? Have a supply that dries up without any medical reasons despite being on ‘lactation herbs’ and prescription medication and feeding every 3 hours? PND? No support? No to all of the above? Then shut the hell up and comment socially on topics where you don’t give yourself away as being an uninformed opinionated ignorant fool.

    • Over ignorant fools says:

      10:30pm | 16/05/10

      Actually Jane, I’m a fella. My sister committed suicide as a result of PND. We think one of the reasons was her inability to breastfeed and the subsequent guilt and anxiety. I dare say it was people like you who piled the guilt on her as a result of her ‘failure’. We do know that one of the midwives in the hospital told her she wasn’t thinking of her baby and ‘not trying hard enough’ when she said she was having problems feeding. Unfortunately it all went downhill from there.
      It is the Breast Nazis like you Jane that I feel sorry for. You put your own beliefs and principles over the welfare and wellbeing of the mother, and in the case of my sister, ultimately the baby.

    • Jane says:

      10:00am | 12/05/10

      Over ignorant fools your name is rather ironic judging by the drivel in your post. You are so full of excuses you were always going to fail at breastfeeding. You are one angry unit too. Perhaps if you stopped blaming the world for your problems then you would do better in life. I feel sad for you and your attitude.

    • Danu says:

      08:23pm | 11/05/10

      Over ignorant fool, I think I love you.

    • sha says:

      09:51pm | 10/05/10

      Noone is listening to anyone on this.Sad.The sisterhood is divided as it always has been.Women. are their own worst enemies.Maturity will sort out all you nasty breast feeders that dare to be judgmental.What if your daughter couldn’t breastfeed?You can’t do it for them.

    • Lanii Douglas says:

      03:03am | 11/05/10

      Carlos, I do not want to be applauded for my commitment!  My commitment was mainly due to the guilt being piled onto me by nipplenazi propagander. 
      Sha, Cathy and Jacs-good on you for trying.  Bravo to you for switching to formula when you realised things weren’t working as they should. 
      I honestly feel more guilty now (24 years later) for continuing to breast feed when it clearly wasn’t working and being a tired, stressed mummy.  The alternative to formula feed now seems like such a good idea.  The baby could even have stayed with a loving friend or relative for a night while I got much needed rest. 
      I do not feel like a hero for breast feeding, I don’t think I have ever been high and mighty about it.  Some of the nipple nazis writing opinions here seem to think they are so wonderful because they breast fed.  Well good on you, we should all genuflect and kiss your ring.  Why does the act of breastfeeding make one a better mother than another who is not?
      Feeding is Best-I applaud you for admitting you hated it, I am fairly certain other women hated it too.  A friend of mine tried in hospital and decided against breast feeding because she too hated it. 
      Sha, my daughter in law is about to give me my first grandchild, and while yes, breast is best and I will do all I can to encourage and help her breast feed, if she cant, or doesn’t want to I will support her in that way too. 
      I sincerely believe no mother makes the decision to bottle feed lightly.
      As I said earlier, it is important that the baby is fed. 
      something else I noticed is the people with the loudest voices here do not even support their own convictions by using their full names.

    • Cathy says:

      09:28pm | 10/05/10

      Please stop judging others! Is it any wonder so many new Mums are being diagnosed with PND when it seems like no matter what you do it isn’t “correct”. Breastfeeding is beautiful, it is the way nature intended, however survival of the fittest also meant that not everything works out the way we want. I empathise with both sides of the debate, as I’ve both breast and bottle fed. I tried so hard to breastfeed my first 2 children only to have to swap to formula (and it’s inherent drawbacks) as I simply couldn’t make enough milk for my big hungry kids. I tried everything to the point of exhaustion and while it seemed like a relief to eventually stop I cannot get over the amount of guilt that has been laid on me for “not trying hard enough”. Even recently as my just 12 mth old has his ECHC check I was being judged for having fully bottlefed him despite the fact that I had tried and failed to feed yet again - whilst being sick (I had an allergic reaction to antibiotics given to combat an infection picked up in hospital after the c-section) and looking after the 3.5 yr old and 21 mth old kids I already had.
      All this judging others has got to stop. Give Mum’s a chance to make their own choices, their own way, using their sources of information and advice and their own “gut instinct”. Please!!!

    • JACS says:

      03:33pm | 10/05/10

      Because judging and shaming mothers is going to do such a brilliant job of increasing breastfeeding rates Rita.

      I attempted to breastfeed for nearly 4 months, I expressed milk 8 times a day, endured all sorts of problems and in the end I ended up with PND. How dare you judge me as being selfish. And how dare you sit and judge anyone who bottle feeds as selfish without knowing all the facts.

    • Lanii Douglas says:

      11:14am | 10/05/10

      JK     if you had read what I had written you would know that I in fact DID persevere and DID feed all FOUR of my children for a total of 11 years!!!  So no-it wasn’t that I couldn’t be bothered, in fact I cared so much about breast feeding that I put the importance of it ahead of everything else.  The sun rose and set on my newborn baby and I so desperately wanted to do everything right for him. 
      I did not call a breast feeding helpline expecting them to praise formula, but I did not expect the reaction that I got either.  However, I took the advice given and continued-with great difficulty-to breast feed him until he weaned himself at just beyond age 2.  From that point he NEVER had a bottle, and began solids at 6 months as well as drinking other liquids from a cup. 
      I even joined the breast feeding group and was an active, card carrying windcheater wearing member for many years (well I wore the windcheater when I eventually changed out of my dressing gown). 
      Despite the fact that I wore my dressing gown until lunchtime, my children were never allowed to wander in the shopping centres and are not delinquents.  The two eldest are successful in their chosen careers,my other son is in an appreticeship and the youngest is a scholarship recipient at one of the state’s prestigious girls’ schools. 
      I was not bragging about being in my dressing gown, merely stating a fact to paint an overall picture of what life was at the time.

    • Carlos says:

      02:32pm | 10/05/10

      You should be applauded for your commitment. If other mums showed your level of commitment then our breastfeeding rate wouldn’t be so pathetically low.

      Well done to the author too for shining a light on this issue with the honesty it requires.

    • Emma says:

      10:49am | 10/05/10

      I love how the bottle mums are up in arms about someone daring to question thier motives. Well ladies hate to break it to you but you are judged. Learn to live with it or change your behaviour.

    • thewiseremma says:

      08:29pm | 27/10/10

      Emma, don’t you think this is a bit unreasonable?
      “Learn to live with it or change your behaviour”
      Just as you have the freedom to make harsh statements like that, new mothers should be given the freedom and ARE given the freedom to make a decision about whether they will breastfeed or bottle feed. It is people like you who make them feel guilty and make their decision and experience as a new mother so stressful and difficult.
      I am not going to be biased and say i am fully for bottle feeding, because obviously nothing is as good as the real stuff, but if a woman is educated about the “harms” of bottle feeding and still decides to bottle feed why should she be judged on that decision!? If she is able to provide the same amount of love and care to her child, why should she change her behaviour? In 20 years time will you be able to identify who was bottle fed and who was breast fed? I highly doubt it. I know I was not breastfed and I’m pretty sure I turned out fine - not obese and fairly intelligent.
      “Learn to live with it” is very easy for you to say, but taking on the role of a new mother would be hard enough. i dont think they need to be criticized on how to behave.
      All this debate on breastfeeding vs bottle feeding is becoming ridiculous. it’s a free world, Let them make their own decisions - if it’s not your child then why should it bother you?

    • Louisa says:

      08:45am | 10/05/10

      Best thing I have read on the issue EVER. All the support and compassion in the world hasn’t improved breastfeeding rates. It’s time we started talking honestly and that includes making judgements on women who won’t breastfeed. The research has been clear for years now lets look at why women in Australia fail to do what women in other countries do.

    • Lanii Douglas says:

      08:12am | 10/05/10

      Rhonda I am so with you!  I just wished I had had the guts to do what you did.  I was in a similar situation, had a painful episiotomy, tearful, run down, tearful, exhausted, tearful, mastitis,tearful, low supply, did I mention tearful?  As a young mum (19) I felt I was already being judged and if I formula fed my baby it would be another thing to criticise me for.
      I remember giving him a bottle of formula one time and he sucked it dry!  I called a breastfeeding help line and asked about low supply and when I mentioned I had given him a bottle it was met witn a gasp of horror and “Oh my God, you didn’t did you?!!!!!!!!!!”  It was S26 not cyanide!  Then told I mustn’t do that , supply and demand blah blah blah, don’t even give him a dummy because that is artificial stimulus.  Well, OK, this is the lady from the helpline, she knows stuff, I am a brand new mother trying to do the right thing so I persevered feeling like a failure and what a terrinble mother I would be if I gave him the cyanide substitute of S26 again.  I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do while my supply replenished but the baby spent most of every day on the breast anyway. 
      What I needed was someone to say “Sweetie, you are a great mum, you did your best, let’s go to the chemist and buy some pretty bottles with Winnie-the Pooh on them and some formula and let’s feed this baby.”
      All those mothers who have written here how they went back to work and they express and they run a house and blah blah blah well aren’t you just clever superwomen who can just do it all. 
      Some of us just aren’t like that.  In fact I can’t remember being out of my dressing gown much before 1:00 in the afternoon most days until my eldest was 6 months old, and I didn’t see the bottom of a coffee cup until he was approaching three.
      So those superwomen who seem to be ‘motherly gifted’ and folk such as Ellie who feel they can judge others despite not having a child, spare a thought for the frightened, nervous new mothers, sitting on the couches still wearing their dressing gowns at lunch time and just trying to do their best. 
      My children are 24, 21, 19 and 16 now, all were breast fed, and it was difficult to establish with all of them.  If I had my time again, knowing what I do now, I would have formula fed all of them.

    • Emma says:

      06:07pm | 17/05/10

      Sorry you had that experience with the breastfeeding counsellor, that sounds enough to shake the confidence of any new mum! Sounds like you were pretty determined to do the best you could for for your bub, hence you reached out for support.

      I assume you are talking about the Australian Breastfeeding Association helpline (previously Nursing Mothers’). Now the helpline is national and all breasfeeding counsellors have around 500 hours training. Although they are all mum volunteers, they are bound by a Code of Ethics. I would encourage anyone who has an experience like this with any support service to report it to the organisation’s head office, if they feel up to it, so that other mums don’t need to have this experience..

    • JK says:

      09:12am | 10/05/10

      Your experience is perfect example of the high failure rate. You gave up at the first hurdle and called a breastfeeding hotline but instead of taking their advice you say you wanted them to tell you that formula was good and you should start feeding them formula. You do realise you called a breastfeeding hotline and not the marketing dept of S26?
      You brag about not getting out of your dressing gown till 1pm every day but you couldn’t be bothered perservering with something as important as breastfeeding. The attitude of some mums just amazes me but I guess that is why we have delinquents running around at every shopping centre and city centre.

    • Isla says:

      07:53am | 10/05/10

      How about we try supporting women who breastfeed instead of making myriad excuses for women who don’t.
      There needs to be more positive feedback for breastfeeding mothers. It is a demanding job to breastfeed for as long as the WHO recommends and these ladies should be commended.
      For whatever reason mothers choose not to breastfeed, that is their decision and good on them for making what they felt was the right decision for them and their families. But we need to stop making excuses and trying to make these mothers “feel better” about their decision being just as good as breastmilk. Let’s spend our energy instead on the breastfeeding mothers who could use the positive support instead.

    • Maggie says:

      07:42am | 10/05/10

      “Didn’t have any milk ” What rubbish - a tiny number of women can’t produce milk. You can even produce milk for someone else’s baby.
      At least be honest and say “I didn’t want to breastfeed.”
      I have fed three babies, went through PND, mastitis etc but was determined and perservered.
      Breastfeeding, like natural birth, should not be a choice. You may as well get used to putting another person’s interests before your own because that’s what motherhood is all about.

    • sha says:

      09:26pm | 10/05/10

      My first daughter would be dead if I didn’t have a ceasarian…she is now a healthy beautiful 16 year old with a new boyfriend and doing her HSC. Shame on you.Shame,shame and shame.Who are you anyway?Pathetic.

    • Bon says:

      10:02am | 10/05/10

      Oh yes please, lets start a debate about natural birth.  Just to add fuel to the fire.  Natural birth, by definition, does not just mean birthing vaginally.  It means birthing vaginally without drugs, without syntocinon infusions, without any intervention of any kind.  A birth such as that is virtually impossible to achieve in this country with the maternal health system set up the way it is.  The only way to truly achieve it is to home birth, and that has just been virtually outlawed by the government in conjunction with doctors.  As for women “choosing” to have caesarians, well as long as there are OBs willing to perform them for no medical reason, the practice will continue. The rise in “elective” caesarians has been driven by the medical profession, not by women.

    • Fiona says:

      09:52am | 10/05/10

      So I guess you’d like to see a lot of motherless babies then would you? Make all women go through natural birth just to satisfy holier-than-thou people like yourself? Perhaps we could take it further and stop interfering with nature and let all babies die that would otherwise need intervention. Perhaps we could put all disabled or premi babies in a bucket of water like an unwanted kitten. Next time you submit a comment Maggie could you please also include your medical qualifications as you are obviously an expert on everything maternal .... Wow, to be you. So bloody perfect.

    • JK says:

      09:23am | 10/05/10

      Well done Maggie I agree with you and congratulate you on perservering when most would’ve quit. Everyone likes to think that a mum would do anything to give their child the best start in life, it’s good to see that is true for you.

    • Therese says:

      08:07am | 10/05/10

      I’m so glad you’re a better mum than I am because of your natural birth.
      Of course, if I’d had a natural birth I’d be dead but let’s not worry about that. I obviously shouldn’t have been given the “choice” to live.

    • Danu says:

      09:04pm | 09/05/10

      This piece is judgmental and completely devoid of compassion towards women. Walk a day in the shoes of a woman with cracked and bleeding nipples, determinedly feeding through agonising pain, with doctors and nurses telling her to ‘just give the baby a bottle’, and when her breastfeeding relationship has been compromised by the bottles she’s been encouraged to feed her baby, and when her baby prefers the bottle to the breast, tell me then how selfish she is. There is nothing to be gained by blaming women when it’s the system that is failing women. Articles like this DAMAGE the cause of raising breastfeeding rates in Australia. The real truth to our poor breastfeeding rates is that women do not have the right kind of support to continue breastfeeding when they have problems, it is definitely not because women don’t want to breastfeed and certainly not because they are selfish.

    • Sam says:

      12:39am | 11/05/10

      What a load of rubbish Danu. The support for breastfeeding in this country is enormous. It is everywhere and it is free and mums are encouraged to take advantage of it. That hasn’t solved the problem because the sad truth is that mums give up too easily. The article mentions Norway and Iran and I googled both countries and guess what they have breastfeeding rates of 75 and 90%! All the pathetic excuses dont change the fact that we have mums refusing to breastfeed despite all the support services and encouragement.
      Articles like this are brilliant in stirring up some debate and exposing some harsh facts that we’d rather ignore. This continual rubbish about more support is not going to solve this problem, the support is there and it’s being ignored.

    • Carlie says:

      08:56pm | 09/05/10

      Excellent work Rita. You have stirred up some great debate and dared to call selfish mums selfish! I can tell you my sister who is a midwife loved your piece and has printed it out and stuck it up at work. Those with a guilty conscience will lash out at any criticism but no matter how many irrational excuses they come up with it won’t change the fact that most women stop breastfeeding for non medical reasons.

    • Stella says:

      09:46pm | 11/05/10

      Clearly your midwide sister is one of the Completely Unsympathetic Nipple Nazi Trolls that I encountered in hospital. I find it distasteful and a little disturbing that she prints up Rita’s tripe and takes it to work. I suggest your sister moves to an occupation where she actually does some good, rather than finding mirth in other people’s distress. So much for nursing being an occupation ‘caring’ for others.
      I feel absolutely no guilt at putting my baby on formula. It was either that or starve her to death because my milk never came in. Thank Goodness I listened to the lactation consultant who finally advised me to put my baby on formula rather than persist in trying to starve a newborn baby to death at the encouragement of midwives.

    • sha says:

      08:20pm | 10/05/10

      I reiterate..I feel no guilt in feeding my children in any way i see fit.

    • Stephanie says:

      07:50pm | 09/05/10

      The writer of this post obviously hasn’t read the most up to date research which says that the optimal time for introducing solids is between 4 and 6 months.  The reason for the WHO guidelines is to encourage women in third world countries who don’t have access to safe water to breastfeed exclusively because that protects the child.  In Australia, it is better to introduce solids earlier because it gets babies used to taste texture and can reduce the likelihood of allergies later in life.

    • Stephanie says:

      11:55am | 10/05/10

      Who said anything about formula? 

      Here is the research I am referring to:

      “Complementary Feeding: A Commentary by the ESPGHAN
      Committee on Nutrition”

      Journal of Pediatric Gastroenterology and Nutrition
      46:99–110 #
      2008
      European Society for Pediatric Gastroenterology, Hepatology, and Nutrition and North American Society for Pediatric Gastroenterology, Hepatology, and Nutrition

      Abstract:
      This position paper on complementary feeding summarizes
      evidence for health effects of complementary foods. It focuses
      on healthy infants in Europe. After reviewing current knowledge
      and practices, we have formulated these conclusions:
      Exclusive or full breast-feeding for about 6 months is a desirable
      goal. Complementary feeding (ie, solid foods and liquids
      other than breast milk or infant formula and follow-on formula)
      should not be introduced before 17 weeks and not later than
      26 weeks.

    • JK says:

      09:15am | 10/05/10

      I’m sorry but you are very wrong. The WHO guidelines has nothing to do with third world countries or western countries. All the research including the latest shows that exclusively breastfeeding for 6 months is best for child. Some children who are bigger than average start wanting solids a little sooner than 8 months and that is fine but that doesn’t mean introduction of formula.

    • Sha says:

      07:00pm | 09/05/10

      Oh I feel no guilt at bottle feeding number one and two and breastfeeding three and four. I can see no discernible health or weight or intelligence between them. I am 45 years old now and I agonised over not breastfeeding number one.In hospital and at home I struggled for 3 months in absolute agony. I was made to feel like garbage by health visitors and mother baby clinics when at the advice of my elder sister I stopped starving my child and gave her her first bottle.I washed all the blood out of my nursing bras and never looked back.

    • Bon says:

      03:54pm | 09/05/10

      You know what?  How I fed my babies is my business and I don’t have to justify myself to anyone - except maybe my kids if they ever come to me one day, accusingly, asking why I did/didn’t breast or bottle feed them.  I certainly do not have to justify myself to other women who seem to think it is their right to pass judgement on other mothers for their apparent shortcomings.  Honestly, don’t you have better things to do? 

      To the mothers that still feel like that they have to explain themselves and their use of formula to feed their babies - you don’t.  It is nobody’s business and it won’t change anything, so just stop worrying about it.

    • Sev says:

      02:31pm | 09/05/10

      I am a mother to two girls. I am 29. I smoked until i was pregnant and quit as soon as I found out I was pregnant. My eldest is 4 years old and i breastfed her for just over 2 years. My second baby is 10 months and I am prepared to continue feeding her up until the age of 2 unless she weans herself.
      I worked full time until the birth of my 4 year old and then returned to work full time when she was 9 months old. I managed to continue feeding her and to also continue working full time. She was already on solids so I would feed before work, she would have her solids during the day and I would feed her once I was back at home. It is all do-able. It just takes some time and organising and as long as you have the will power.
      My issue with women that don’t breastfeed is the women who choose not to even try to attempt it. Of course it is going to hurt, of course its going to take a lot of time to perfect it, of course your going to have to persist but that is what being a MOTHER is.
      I had two friends that did not even bother trying to breastfeed their babies when they were born because they thought it was too hard. How could they know if they hadn’t even tried. These same friends were constantly at the doctors due to their kids being sick frequently.
      I understand when a woman cannot breastfeed due to lack of milk, or a medical condition but I will never understand why women give up so easily after 2-3 attempts (or none). Being a Mother is not easy. If you cannot prepare for breastfeeding how can you prepare for what being a mother is all about. We cannot just give up being a mother when we choose to. We choose to have babies therefore we should choose to take more responsibility of them.
      I am in a very small minority of women that breastfed for the length of time I did. I was constantly told that i should stop by people around me but I didn’t. The bond breastfeeding creates between and mother and child is amazing. I feel that if women persisted more at the beginning of motherhood and got over the hard part, they would definately enjoy it more. Its truly a special gift. At least do it for the first 6 months its definately worth it. Trust me.

    • Davida Sydney says:

      01:54pm | 09/05/10

      This may be a under the guise of a well-meaning piece but it is a very tactless and insensitive article. I suggest this author re-read it pretending she is unable to breastfeed (and feels she has no choice but to use formula as her child will starve).  Please do not be so judgemental and insensitive and use so many sweeping statments. I don’t want to know that after I couldn’t breastfeed for medical reasons my child will grow up fat and stupid!!! Thank you for the thought - you have worsened the experience greately for me. I hope this email gets passed on to the author, please, so she can learn from her insensitivity.

    • Mum and Midwife says:

      01:36pm | 09/05/10

      Rita, love this piece, did exactly what you wanted it to… Raising awareness through discussion.

      I breastfed through 4 bouts of mastitis right up until my daughter was 18 months of age. Her needs outweighed the agony breastfeeding put me through. But that was my choice.

      There are many variables that contribute to cessation of breastfeeding in the first 6 months of life. For me personally, pain was not an excuse to wean my child from the breast. Breastfeeding was a wonderful experience and my daughter’s self-induced weaning was traumatic for me rather than her.

      What women need is greater access to support services to help establish breastfeeding in the early weeks following birth. The first weeks of a child’s life are emotionally trying, wrought with anxiety and sleep deprivation. It is not hard to see why women turn to the bottle. I can only assume how aguished and guilty women feel weaning a child from breast to bottle, especially if they had every intention for breastfeeding for a prolonged period of time.

      For 99.9% of women I dont believe early cessation of breastfeeding is the result of a woman’s selfishness, but a lack of in-home and community based support from families, community members, midwives and early childhood carers in the first six months of life.

    • Chris says:

      11:06am | 09/05/10

      Your “choice” ends when you “choose” to have a child.

      Feed the thing the way nature intended it.

      There are no men to blame here.

    • Bec says:

      10:01am | 09/05/10

      Your high-and-mighty attitude, which is shared by many midwives and baby health nurses,  is another reason many woman choose not to breatfeed.  How dare you lord it over the women who find it difficult (for whatever reason) to breatfeed their kids.  You write as if making a personal choice to share the care of your child with your husband, or take care of yourself if the most wicked thing a woman could ever do.

      I breastfed my son for a little over six months.  It was extremely difficult and included two painful bouts of mastitis.  I was unable to enjoy my baby for most of those six months as I was deliriously tired, sick and felt the pressure not to stop so acutely.  When I eventually did chuck in the towel, I felt a complete failure as a mother.

      After a couple of weeks of no longer breatfeeding and expressing, my family begain to recover.  Mummy finally had a little sleep and was able to share some of the heavy-duty feeding schedule with Dad, which also helped the two of them to bond.

      Whilst it is true that breastfeeding provides the best nutritional option for infants, sometimes when this is weighed up against the affects upon the family unit and the mother in particular, I think it is completely understandable that not all women want to do it!

    • HJ says:

      08:51am | 09/05/10

      How about those who abort their unborn babies?

      Will you be writing an article about their selfishness too, Rita?

      Because let’s face it, if you’re going to fully explore the ‘selfishness’ argument, you really should.

    • Matthew Cook says:

      07:50am | 09/05/10

      You can go to hell with a comment like “The selfishness of Mothers”. My wife tried and failed when it came to breast feeding so she made the call to hit the bottle. Now grown up, my kids are not retarded, fat, stupid or constantly ill. Breastfeeding simply wasn’t worth the grief. That is her right to make that call.

      The whole breastfeeding issue was the cause of such bitchyness with women when we had our kids and it oviously still exists. People like yourself are like born-again Christians looking down on everyone thinking you are so high and mighty. Like the silly old nurse who came to the house and called my wife a bad mother.

      It is all about choice, the individuals choice.

    • amanda says:

      03:22am | 09/05/10

      Just wondering if there were any studies that could correlate PND rates and breastfeeding rates - it would be interesting to see if failure at breastfeeding increased the risk of PND?  And I bet that the PND rates are related and skyrocket after reading inflammatory articles like this one!

      I believe breast is best, providing the mother herself is fit and healthy; surely a mother who isn’t getting sufficient or adequate nutrition herself, is unlikely to produce good milk?  Citing how women in third world countries exclusively breastfeed isn’t helpful either, particularly as their children still face a much higher death rate than in the first world (breastmilk doesn’t protect you from all diseases, war or from famine - if the mother can’t feed, the kid can’t feed).

      I tried to breastfeed, but couldn’t - I had tendonytis and was physically unable to hold the babies to breast (as anyone who has breastfed knows, you have to bring the infant to the breast and I couldn’t hold them in position).  Expressed milk for 8 weeks with complementary formula feeding, but expressing milk didn’t provide the stimulation necessary to build up the milk supply adequately, so finally gave up at 9 weeks after my doctor and the kids’ paed both said I had given it my best shot and the kids would be fine.  And they are.

      The fact is I live in a first world country with good water and a clean area to prepare the bottles.  My kids apppear to be healthy and hitting the milestones.  They haven’t caught any illnesses yet and when they do, I am sure that I can get access to antibiotics, painkillers and expert doctor advice.  I keep them clean, vaccinated, exercised and stimulated - I have, therefore, given them the best start I could.

    • Eleanor says:

      02:37am | 09/05/10

      Wow. This article has really cemented my desire to not have children. So many people feel so justified in telling others exactly what they should do and how ashamed they should feel if they don’t do it.

      Thanks, but I think I’ll have a dog instead.

    • Fiona says:

      11:57pm | 08/05/10

      I have successfully breastfed both my babies ( still breastfeeding my youngest) and have never encountered any negative remarks, looks etc whilst feeding in public. I feed my babies whenever they need to be fed and i strongly believe the vast majority of our society really don’t mind how our little ones are being fed, as long as they are being loved and cared for. I do concider myself fortunate to be able to breastfeed whilst still working full time, mostley due to my works’ breastfeeding policy and the total support of my collegues. I do believe breast is best, however, I also believe that loving your children is the bottom line.

    • Jane says:

      11:21pm | 08/05/10

      I hope they are not being paid for that extra 60 minutes of breaks. Healthy or otherwise, they are not doing productive work in that time.

    • AJ says:

      10:46pm | 08/05/10

      What a surprise…... a woman prepared to keep it real and talk about ths issue without all the usual BS. Better go in to hiding Rita because the sisters won’t like you calling them selfish. The truth hurts and we love to shoot the messenger. Keep up the good work.

    • Belle says:

      10:13pm | 08/05/10

      I was in the supposed 1 to 2 per cent minority who, try as I might, could not breast feed.  If your doctor botches the delivery, you nearly die in child birth and subsequently don’t produce enough milk… you have little option but to give your baby formula or it will starve.  Unfortunately, even in my circumstances the midwives (aka breast-feeding bitches) were vicious over my inability to produce enough breast milk to feed my child.  I desperately wanted to breast feed, but could not.  Did they believe me? No.  So, today I say to new mothers “who cares what anybody else thinks.  Do what is right for you.” And, to those who would dictate how people feed their babies I say…“Mind your own business. You are ill-informed and wrong.  You are savage interfering bitches.”

    • ROBYN says:

      09:59pm | 08/05/10

      Breast is best…no one can argue against this statment. Cows milk (formula) is for baby cows, breastmilk is for baby humans. However, I do acknowledge some women do struggle to breastfeed. Therefore, ALL women, and their partners, need to unite and demand governments to provide more Lactation Consultants in hospitals. Lactation consultants need to be freely available for women in those early days post hospital discharge. Then, and only then, will australian breastfeeding rates increase and all australian babies be given the absolute best start to life.
      No matter what bottle feeding mums say, breast feeding is the only food babies should have for 6 months and anything else is second rate. As my Welsh midwife friend says to new mums…”äre you going to give your baby poison? No? then you must be going to breastfeed!”

      Babiee are meant to breastfeed….more learning, help and support is needed for mums. This wont happen until we as a society accept that breast feeding is the only way to feed babies.

    • Jayne says:

      09:12pm | 08/05/10

      I’d like to throw in my opinion for what it’s worth. Why the attacks? People make choices based on their own situations and who are any of us to stand in judgment? Frankly I think the selfishness accusation is a little rich considering the very fact that we have kids in the first place could also be said to be for very selfish reasons. Why do any of us have kids?  It’s for ourselves. With all that aside, we need to support each other. For me, the issue of breastfeeding (while important at the time) now pales as I have a child with a disability. When you deal with the countless problems and difficulties that arise here, you start to realise the importance of the support of other parents. Attacking one another is counter productive. Be nicer to each other.

    • MotherOf2 says:

      08:00pm | 08/05/10

      “Good grief”, I’ve got no idea what point you’re trying to make with regard to mine…did you read any of this first, or are you just bragging about being such a wonderful, self-righteous parent? I’m pointing out that Ellie, a non-mother who’s never breastfed, says that “it’s not chauvinistic male attitudes or outdated workplace practises that prevent women breastfeeding, it is simply mothers putting their own interests before that of their child”, a comment to which I take great offence, especially from someone who’s never walked in the shoes of a mother desperately trying to breastfeed! The needs of the rest of the family, my own mental health and that of a baby that’s failing to thrive all contribute to a decision to discontinue breastfeeding, not “my own selfish interests”! And frankly, this article suggesting that women who don’t / don’t continue to breast feed do so out of inconvenience is also a sweeping statement that does nothing for the bf movement.

    • Jade says:

      07:44pm | 08/05/10

      Why has mother hood become such a battle ground? When you have a mortgage, other children to feed and no other option other than to go back to work soon after delivering a child, trying to live up to the expectations of other women are excruciating. For both of my children I have breastfed, despite being back at work full time, and for both managed to do so for eight months. This, however, made my working life extremely difficult,  and trying to keep milk production up enough to cover all feeds, via a breast pump and trying to get a self-weening baby to then go back to breastfeeding is extremely stressful and to be honest, exhausting and painful.

      Being able to supplement my son’s with formula was something that due to my lack of milk, something I had to do from time to time. Believe me, you Breastfeeding Nazis, working mothers feel BAD ENOUGH about being away from their children. We feel Bad enough that we are missing this most precious time. Articles like this are ignorant, damaging and to be honest, self glorification of you bastions of mother hood, the stay at home mums. Well good for you, you self righteous pains in the arse. Pat your lucky selves on the back for how bloody awesome you are to have the luck to be at home and able to keep your milk supply up to do this.

      Instead of attacking women who are unable to breastfeed, why not encourage, inform and support them? Has anyone ever thought that perhaps a more gentle approach may have better results than examples of the crap that has been written here???. The amount of aggressive guilt based attacks from other sanctimonious stay at home mothers I have endured for comp-ing my children only occasionally with formula has given me a whole new understanding of how bloody awful women can be to one another and how awful it must be for women who genuinely need to use formula. .

      The percentage of parents who are selfish and chose to use formula so they can “party” is miniscule. It disgusts me that intelligent, smart and loving women can be so wilfully ignorant.

    • Em says:

      07:25pm | 08/05/10

      You can choose to smoke and drink when pregnant . You can choose to give a vulnerable child artificially produced powdered milk. You can choose to smoke around your kids. Or you can choose to be a decent mother who does what she knows is right.  The science in this area is conclusive, anyone who can read would be aware of the hundreds of studies that show how unique and amazing breast milk is.
      I continued to breastfeed my children after returning to work and I encountered many of the problems mentioned by other mums here. I’m not the most maternal woman in the world but I would never do the wrong thing by my children. If I can do it with the difficult circumstances I faced then anyone can.

    • Brett L says:

      07:09pm | 08/05/10

      Gee I’m glad I had a real mother who breast fed me and me me grow strong tall and handsome. Feel sorry for those others.

    • joanne says:

      06:42pm | 08/05/10

      This article, as all past articles regarding breastfeeding, was written to get a reaction, it’s only for your ego Rita that you write such a contentious piece. If you had any idea of the trauma that you are making such ridiculous statements, you would surely reconsider. There are women out their suffering from PND because they feel a failure and you may have just pushed someone over the edge. I hope that one day you do get to breastfeed your child and when it’s screaming in the middle of the night and your nipples are pouring with blood then maybe, just maybe, you might be able to comment… Breastfeeding does not make you a good mother, it’s a beautiful experience when it goes write and horrendous when it doesn’t, it has nothing to do with mothering skills, get over yourself and comment on things that you know something about.

    • Lousie says:

      06:25pm | 08/05/10

      Are all blogs set up to hurt people?
      We live in a society that demands that both parents work not for a superior life style but just a life.  Perhaps the author prefers that people with children should consider selling up the house and living in a tent to ensure no overheads thus more time and no needed second job.  I note that depression is common place now and a major cause is sleep deprivation.  Babies are good at causing it.  Perhaps the author of this callous article would prefer more suicidal women in our society?
      We don’t live in the 50’s.  Society has changed and our parenting methods have changed to compensate.  Why not slang some rubbish at a government who gladly pays poor people to have babies than help the more successful taxpayers have children.

    • Old bag says:

      10:31am | 10/05/10

      I worked full time and breastfed for two years. We don’t even live in a tent.

      Babies cause sleep deprivation regardless of the mode of feeding. And fathers can bond with their babies without having to shove crap in a can down their throats.

    • Don says:

      06:07pm | 08/05/10

      Im going to leave my comment though I know you will have tired of reading this stuff well before you get to it.  My wife tried to breastfeed but was not successful with either of our children.  I sometimes thank my lucky stars that because of that, that I was able to do late night and anytime bottle feedings.  I know that I grew closer to my children in those first few years because of that

    • Jenny says:

      05:56pm | 08/05/10

      So one would think that unless you want your children to grow up fat and stupid ....  what a ridiculous and inane and quite frankly outdate, backward comment that is.  Surely Rita you would know that this is a flawed argument - or perhaps you are stupid.  So much pressure on new mums to be perfect in everything they do its no surprise that rates of post natal depression are on the increase.  Do us a favour Rita - take a walk.  New mothers must be left to manage the best way for them and if that means that the child is bottlefed ... then so be it, the baby is eating.  Why don’t you turn your energies to trying to help underpriviledged babies with their feeding.

    • Carlie says:

      08:51pm | 09/05/10

      So much irrational vitriol Jenny sounds like you have a guilty conscience. Underpriviledged babies in this country are the least likely to be breastfed because of their idiot mums. What can Rita do about that, turn in to a full time wet nurse lol? With all the support mums have now there is no excuse not to breastfeed but I’m sure you will come up with 101 reasons.

    • Carlie says:

      08:50pm | 09/05/10

      So much irrational vitriol Jenny sounds like you have a guilty conscience. Underpriviledged babies in this country are the least likely to be breastfed because of their idiot mums. What can Rita do about that, turn in to a full time wet nurse lol? With all the support mums have now there is no excuse not to breastfeed but I’m sure you will come up with 101 reasons.

    • Janie says:

      05:25pm | 08/05/10

      Thank god someone is prepared to speak the truth!

      Every other week new research comes out telling us how beneficial breastmilk is for a baby.

      It is simple, either your priority is what is best for the child or what is easiest for you. Unless you are one of the 2-4% who can’t breastfeed you should.

    • Feeding is best says:

      04:37pm | 08/05/10

      For all new and expectant mums:  Feed your baby and feel good about it.  That’s all.  Feed it.  Without feeding, the child will die.  If you can’t breastfeed, you can bottle feed and the child will survive.  That’s all you need to know.  Food equals survival. 

      AND, I’m just going to say it and you can burn me at the stake for it later.  I didn’t like breastfeeding.  Hated it.

      Tried it with my first, lasted 7 weeks until the child was so skinny it was shameful.  I gave her formula one night and expressed to see what my production was first thing in the morning after I was rested - 5ml from one side and about 40ml from the other.  And I was encouraged to keep trying.  Good advice. 

      Tried again with my second and I couldn’t get her off.  Lasted 13 months before I finally said enough.  13 months of looking with disinterest at my child on my breast.  It was not a bonding time for me.  I didn’t like the sensation, I didn’t like the way my child pulled and pinched her way through a feed, I didn’t like the way she would grab me whenever and whereever we were (I live in a Muslim country - not exactly accepted either), I didn’t like that my husband or older daughter missed out on opportunities to feed the baby (she wouldn’t take a bottle of expressed milk).  I didn’t like the way that I would return home halfway through the occasional dinner out in order to give her a feed when she wouldn’t settle.  I gave it up and didn’t miss it.  At all.  Didn’t think twice about it then or now. 

      Both children are fit and healthy without colds/runny noses until reaching school and so far are parallel with their histories of health and development.

      Just feed the child and don’t feel guilty about it.

    • Jane says:

      04:35pm | 08/05/10

      Until we know the individual circumstances of every mother, no one has a right to judge whether they breast feed or use formula. I would suggest that possible reasons why women of higher incomes breast feed more (according to the author) is because they get more time off through better access to paid parental leave, and are in more of an economic position to negotiate better conditions at work than those women on much lower incomes.

      Women can be their own worst enemy. Instead of judging and blaming we should be supporting all women and the often difficult choices they make on a daily basis.

      The author of this article ought to hold her head in shame.

    • Breast-fed baby says:

      07:39pm | 08/05/10

      Jane said “I would suggest that possible reasons why women of higher incomes breast feed more (according to the author) is because they get more time off through better access to paid parental leave,”

      This is another weak excuse from the taxpayer-funded-cash-handouts for baby-makers’ lobby, There is no hard evidence that paid parental leave guarentees breast feeding. Even the Productivity Commission’s report in the government-funded paid parental leave scheme observed that mothers ceased breast feeding because the supply dried up and not because they were back in the workplace. Even this forum seems to offer a myriad of explanations as to why mothers choose not to breastfeed and it seems a lack of cash handouts has very little to do with it.

      “However, she only managed to breastfeed for 10 weeks max because there was no milk”

      ” I didn’t like breastfeeding.  Hated it.”

      “For example I had nipples that bled so badly I had scabs in my bra”

      “my wife also got a nipple infection (on both) meaning she couldn’t feed without being in agonising pain. “

      “Why don’t women breastfeed longer than six months?  One word:
      TEETH.”

      ” managed to breastfeed all of my children, but never for longer than six months”

      I have no issue with mothers breastfeeding in public. It keeps their kids quiet. (Mind you, soggy breast milk tissues left behind on cafe tables is more than unpleasant, it is a health hazard—HIV viruses anyone?)

      But I do find it repellant that this debate is just a another misappropriated feeble excuse to give unaccountable wads of taxpayers’ money to the sort of parents who refuse to adjust their lifestyle and conspicuous consumption when they birth.

    • Trent says:

      02:25pm | 08/05/10

      Unless a woman has a medical condition that prevents her from breast feeding, she should breast feed. It is the healthiest option for the child, and that child depends on it’s parents to make the best choice for them.

      There should not be any issues with breast feeding in public. Most women do their best to be discreet, and regardless, people need to sensible and realise the woman is doing the right thing by her baby.

    • CC says:

      02:23pm | 08/05/10

      Alot of women need to get back into the workforce very soon after birth so it doesn’t give them time to express or breastfed - because the cost of living is horrendous they can’t afford not to work!!!!!

    • sam says:

      02:16pm | 08/05/10

      I think Rita has touched a nerve with people. I personally think that there needs to be more support in the community in general for BF. I am the only one out of my extended family who has BF their baby and have been heavily criticised by family for this decision. I had a lot of problems with BF - you name it - it happened. For example I had nipples that bled so badly I had scabs in my bra! However, most of these problems resolved after the first 8 weeks. Yes, 8 weeks is a long time, but if in the end if it means benefits for the baby its worth it. Look - what I am trying to say is that BF is hard work for the first 2 to 3 months - I think sometimes people are unrealistic about it - you have to be really really committed to it. To be this committed, you need support. The area health service where I live has BF support groups and runs mothers groups whereby around 12 women form a group, are encouraged to still see each other every week after the 6 week group is over and then we go back every few months for up to two years. It was by being in this group and having the support group available to me, that encouraged me to continue. No one judged me - some women found it easy, others had drains from mastitis - but we all supported each other and traded sob stories!. Out of the 12 of us, only one didnt perservere and her decision to bottle feed was a good one for her and none of us think otherwise. I really think the issue with BF is that people think its going to be easy - its not. Problems often happen and it takes a lot of time to get over them. I can see maybe why people give up easily - I didnt - and yeah it was tough but now I feel happy I pushed on as the nurses were right - with perserverance most problems with BF go away after 6 to 8 weeks. For some people that may be too long, but at the end of the day, BF is actually really easy. It just takes time and repitition! Maybe with more realistic education about the bad stuff and the time it can take to recover from the bad stuff,  would prepare mothers more. This in combination with a bit more support in the community may lift the rates. At the end of the day, the decision is yours, but at least if there was more education and support, people may feel more comfortable to push through problems and only then will they see the benefits in the long term. I think its hard to see those benefits until you do it .

    • thom says:

      01:36pm | 08/05/10

      I find this article highly elitist, judgemental and offensive.

      My wife and I recently had our first child and we were determined to breast feed, however sometimes it just can’t happen.  Not only did our son not attach properly (for 4-5 months) thus not get enough milk (he was hungry every 20mins even after 2 hours of feeding), my wife also got a nipple infection (on both) meaning she couldn’t feed without being in agonising pain. Our child got about 3 months of pure breastmilk before having to change to formula. 

      Oh how I love being judged by elitist women who had it easy.

    • SB says:

      12:28pm | 08/05/10

      Well said Rita but you should know better than to upset the angry mummys of Australia.

      If only 14% are sticking to the WHO guidelines then that leaves 86% angry mums who don’t want to be judged.

    • Belle says:

      10:22pm | 08/05/10

      Get a life SB and leave strangers alone.  Neither you nor Rita have a clue about why people don’t breast feed.  Mothers who give their babies formula do so for a variety of personal reasons and yes, they are tired of being judged by narrow-minded fools.

    • Youna says:

      11:42am | 08/05/10

      Agree 100%. Mums are becoming more selfish and choosing what is easy over what is right.

      If women in developing countries with no support can breastfeed then we should be able to do it here where there is plenty of support and encouragement.

    • Dan says:

      11:11am | 08/05/10

      Why don’t women breastfeed longer than six months?  One word:

      TEETH.

      Besides, at around six months they start eating mushy rice and vegetables and they start to refuse the breast.  You wouldn’t keep feeding them formula from a bottle after six months (unless you’re easily impressed by marketing ploys from the formula manufacturers), so it’s a bit daft to suggest that infants ‘ought to’ be breastfed once they’re eating solids.

      Yes I know I’m male, but I do have kids and I was involved in their feeding and weaning.

    • Corben says:

      08:21pm | 11/05/10

      Teeth is an excuse some people I know have trotted out so they can stop breastfeeding at 6 months.  There is a difference Dan, between a child choosing to stop because they feel satisfied with solids and a mom making a child stop because she wants to. So don’t feel so attacked Dan, the article is about women being selfish which your wife wasn’t as your children chose to stop at months.  AND I hope you never have to bite the nipples of that tough guy in prison…he might like it! 
      I, personally, have never understood the 6 month ‘I’ve done my duty’ benchmark.  Obviously you’ve done bloody well to get over the cracked nipples, sore boobs, difficult stage of breastfeeding then stop…I don’t get it.
      The case of the 2 year old wanting boobie every ten minutes being creepy…yes it is your problem unless you think this child is perverted?  Seems like normal 2 year old pushing the boundry behaviour to me.

    • Dan says:

      08:05pm | 10/05/10

      Thanks for the info Bon, but all three of our kids started refusing the breast at around 6 months, which is the same time they started getting teeth and enjoying mushed solids.  I guess every kid is different.
      @Corben, as for teeth being just an excuse… well, I’d let you discuss that with my wife but you wouldn’t get very far.  Pretty nasty actually, but at least now I know what I’d do if I were in jail and some tough guy tried to force me do do him a ‘favour’.
      I have seen one case where the kid would walk up to the mum every ten minutes or so, politely ask for some milk, have a couple of sucks and then go back to playing.  Now that’s creepy!  Yes, I do realise that me finding that creepy is my problem and there’s nothing at all wrong with a two and a half year old doing that (apparently??).  But still, it IS creepy!

    • Corben says:

      05:38pm | 10/05/10

      Teeth?  Just another excuse…
      My son is 3 years old and amazingly has teeth and eats solids…yes solid food, but still loves mummy’s milk and would choose my milk over any sweet treat you would try to tempt him with. 
      Bon is right, milk - what ever its form- is the primary source of nutrition for a child up to a year old.

    • Bon says:

      03:23pm | 09/05/10

      Actually, Dan, breastmilk or formula needs to be the primary source of nutrition for babies until they are 12 months old (and according to the WHO, babies should be breastfed until 2 years of age as an ideal).  Yes, they eat solids before then but until 1 year of age breastmilk or formula is still the most important source of nutrition for them.  After that, cows milk is ok to drink so formula is not really necessary and it is those toddler formulas (for kids aged 1-3) that are a big marketing con.  But no child health nurse/paediatrician would recommend a parent stop breastfeeding or formula at 6 months of age.

    • Jasmine says:

      10:56am | 08/05/10

      So many excuses from bitter sounding mums on this comment board make sad reading.  Motherhood is about loving your child and giving them the BEST start in life you possibly can and that includes breastfeeding. All the excuses in the world won’t change that. If a cracked nipple or mastitis is enough to make you stop then I hate to think how you handle other aspects of raising a child.

    • anne says:

      10:33pm | 09/05/10

      Yes, yes, breast is best - we all know that. The professional input would have been around ways to help women persevere and overcome problems - because the author obviously hasn’t a clue. And her facts are wrong - breastfeeding isn’t “covered at length in ante-natal classes” . If she’d been to any she’d know this. But fine, don’t “play nice” - whatever rocks your boat. Just don’t expect to be doing anything remotely constructive, like, increasing breastfeeding rates for example.

    • Janie says:

      05:37pm | 08/05/10

      I agree with you Jasmine, the article just states facts that are obviously too hard for easily defeated mum to hear.
      Anne I would’ve thought the facts were pretty clear. Also this is an opinion piece so why would the writer speak to professionals when we know what the professionals all say- breast is best!  The stats are damning and I like the fact that this writer isn’t holding back and playing nice. Well done.

    • anne says:

      04:46pm | 08/05/10

      Hmm, what you call excuses, looks to me like the exasperation of rational people to a piece of manipulative tripe. You didn’t notice that our fearless writer has hardly offered a single fact, or spoken with professionals in the area? Really? FYI I have breastfed after a rough start like many other mums and what I find sad is that some people do “holier than thou”  far better than empathy!

    • Steph says:

      10:16am | 08/05/10

      I absolutely agree with this - there is simply nothing better than breasmilk for a baby, and I will not tolerate anyone saying otherwise. Understandably, there are a few mothers out there that are unable to breastfeed for whatever reason, and sadly (and I know a few mothers in this position) they are often the most desperate to breastfeed before finding out they cannot. Any new mother must, in the health and wellbeing of her new baby attempt to breastfeed - I breastfed my baby for 15 months before returning to work and she has never once been sick, not even a runny nose. I gave up taking her to mothers group because often half the other mums and babies didnt even turn up due to some kind of illness or sickness. And yes, I was the only one, out of about 20 that breastfed. Sad.

    • Joanne says:

      08:53am | 08/05/10

      The mother of a newborn has a choice:
      A) Do what is best for the newborn and breastfeed.
      B) Don’t do what is best for the newborn.

      Simple - no blaming society, men, whatever - its your choice, do whats best for your baby or don’t, simple.

    • Toni says:

      11:16am | 08/05/10

      Beautifully and simply put, Joanne.

      Some of the angry mums on here need to have a look at their own choices rather than make excuses or attack everybody else.

    • John in Alice says:

      08:39am | 08/05/10

      Many should ask themselves why Australians allowed the economy to be manipulated into a situation where a single income is not enough to raise a family. Who priced houses out of reach? Who decided a need for 2 cars, for all those expensive electronic toys and the lavish lifestyles that insisted you entertain or be entertained on a regular basis, not to mention the need to travel far and wide every year?  What your grandparents were able to scrape by on when raising children seems not nearly good enough for modern parents who have to have it all NOW has pushed most Australians into their current situation.  As Mum would have said, “You’ve made your bed, now you’ve got to sleep in it.”

    • Natalie says:

      08:30am | 08/05/10

      I am still breastfeeding my 8 month old little girl.  I truly believe that you can overcome most obstacles when trying to breastfeed your child as there are many resources available.  Due to my daughter being in ICU for four weeks I was only able to start breastfeeding from when she was 3 weeks old.  I then had to top up with formula for just over a month until my milk supply caught up, which it did.  I had to put up like everyone else with grazed nipples, bleeding nipples and painful times but I persisted!  And now, it is a breeze and I am so pleased that I have given my daughter this beautiful gift.  Now I have been through this with breastfeeding, I am quick to think that when women say ‘I can’t breastfeed’ or ‘my nipples are bleeding’ and stop breastfeeding that they are quick to give up and didn’t really give it a chance.

      I know it is time consuming and hard as it is just you, but it isn’t forever and it is such a wonderful time to bond with your child, I would never want this to be taken away from us.

    • Jasmine says:

      10:53am | 08/05/10

      Natalie I had a very similar experience to you. Breastfeeding didn’t come naturally for me and it took months of hardwork but it was worth it. So many other mums I know give up as soon as they have one obstacle. So many excuses from bitter sounding mums on this comment board make sad reading.

    • History fan says:

      08:28am | 08/05/10

      Perhaps we could revive the old career of wet-nursing.

    • Corben says:

      10:56am | 10/05/10

      If you are serious, I think it is a fabulous idea…but could you imagine peoples’ reactions?  I have breastfed my niece on occasion but the reaction of the midwives was such that my sister in law began to feel uncomfortable with it!  So now I pump as it is more socially acceptable to feed a baby from a bottle.  Some people need to get over their body issues.
      I wish it would be made easier for successful breastfeeders to donate their milk for others who are less successful…human milk for human babies is my mantra.

    • Skip says:

      07:49am | 08/05/10

      My wife has breastfed both of our kids. Exclusively for the first 6 months and ongoing until 2 y.o.

      Sure, it is a romantic incovienience for both of us, and my wife had to bear the brunt of the midnights, however we always knew it was for the greater good.

      I personally think parters are often part of the problem, not providing nearly enough emotional support. Many partners get wrapped up in how it impacts them rather than focusing on the benefits it is providing for their wifes and offspring.

      As for men being disgusted…grow up.

    • Audrey says:

      02:36pm | 08/05/10

      Well said and done.

    • Catherine says:

      07:30am | 08/05/10

      Thankyou, Richard, for providing some balance to the debate. And yes, Rita, Mum of 2 is right. You ought to be deeply ashamed of yourself. Do you have any children? I think that if you are going to be so judgmental, you need to be able to say that you have some experience of parenting.

      Yes, almost all women are able to breastfeed. But women who breastfeed need a lot of support. They need to be in a situation where they can focus solely on breastfeeding, which means being able to rest during the day, being able to eat healthy food at regular intervals and having a support network to assist with the care of older children. Without these things, the milk supply will simply decrease and be insufficient. When women need to work outside the home for financial reasons (and please don’t spout off about choices, given the size of the average mortgage), they can’t focus solely on breastfeeding. When women have no family nearby and can’t afford to pay for childcare for older children, they have nobody to help them to get the rest they need. Funnily enough, single income families have to live in accordance with strict budgets and child care is a luxury that few can afford. All mothers, regardless of whether or not they work outside the home, are tired at the best of times.

      I know what I’m talking about. I am a mother of four. I am an experienced lawyer. I’ve had times when I’ve been a stay-at-home mother and times when I’ve been in the work force, both full time and part time. No situation has ever been ideal. I managed to breastfeed all of my children, but never for longer than six months. Try getting enough rest and eating properly at regular intervals when you have no family living in the same State and a husband who is working long hours to financially support the family unit. At some point, yes, you do need to set your priorities. And quite frankly, an exhausted, cranky, guilt-ridden mother is a very bad outcome for every member of the family. Don’t talk about choices, Rita, unless you’ve ever been in the position where you have to make choices about children, finances and family life. Parents make “choices” in the context of some unavoidable realities.

    • Catherine says:

      05:41pm | 08/05/10

      Women in developing countries have extended families to assist them with older children and assist with housework. In Middle Eastern countries, custom dictates that new mothers spend at least the first couple of months lying in bed and breastfeeding while other women attend to the housework and the needs of the men and other children. Women in developing countries live completely different lifestyles, and their children have completely different life chances, to women and children who live in first world countries. Again, I’d rather be bottle fed in Australia than breastfed in Iran or Bangladesh.

      The Australian Breastfeeding Association, and any midwife or lactation consultant, will tell you that breastfeeding women need rest, healthy food and support if they’re going to succeed. And not all women have access to those things. Perhaps that’s a large part of the reason why other commentators here have mentioned that the statistics show that women from less fortunate socioeconomic backgrounds are breastfeeding less than women who are more fortunate.

      Again, I think mothers need to be less judgmental of each other. 86% of Australian women are, for one reason or another, failing to meet the WHO breastfeeding guidelines. I simply do not believe that 86% of childbearing Australian women are selfish. I do believe that their life circumstances or their physical or mental states have led them to choose not to breastfeed. The larger your family, the more people you have to consider when you make choices. That is why I said earlier that I don’t see the virtue in continuing to breastfeed if it means being unable to pay the mortgage. It’s easy enough to say, “Well, just relocate to cheaper digs” but you can’t live in an apartment if you have four children. Well, you can, but it would create more problems than it would solve.

      And no, I’m not saying, “Poor bugger me”. I chose to have all four of my children. I chose to stop breastfeeding when each of them were six months old. It was more important to me to ensure the financial security of my family. We can’t afford not to prioritise that. Our third child was born with life-threatening medical problems and it is vital that we stay where we are, in our own home close to good hospitals. To do otherwise would be irresponsible. We knew prior to out son’s birth that he would have medical problems. We made the choice to accept him and love him as he was, and we have never regretted that choice. And we made the choice to have our fourth child subsequently. Yes, Breast is Best, we do all have “sob stories” in our lives and it is how we deal with them that matters most. ALL mothers are heroes, and we need to support each other.

    • Nes says:

      02:02pm | 08/05/10

      What rubbish!  Women don’t need rest, time and healthy food to breastfeed - yes that would be ideal but it is not necessary.  Do you think women in developing countries can afford to sit around all day?  And yet they manage to breastfeed.

    • Catherine says:

      01:40pm | 08/05/10

      Yes, I am a capable woman. I don’t believe I just wrote a long “diatribe” or a “sob story”. Good on you for breastfeeding for as long as you did. Some women just can’t, end of story. And some women choose to stop because they have conflicting priorities and they need to make decisions that provide the greatest benefit for the family as a whole.

      Yes, breast is best, but what I was arguing was that there are many priorities that need to be weighed up. The equation is not as simple as breastfeeding nazis like to believe. Many, many things contribute to a child’s IQ and life chances, not the least of which are genetics and the social environment in which they live.What is the point of continuing to breastfeed if you have to choose between either doing that or paying the mortgage? Where is the virtue in having the bank foreclose on the family home?  I’d rather be bottle fed in my family home in a safe part of town than breastfed in public housing in a place where crime and social problems are the norm. And I respect the right of EVERY parent to make whatever decisions they see fit when it comes to feeding babies, vaccination, religious orientation, schooling, financial planning and any other issues that are part and parcel of having children. All parents are doing the best they can to give their kids the best possible start to life, even those parents that you might believe are making the “wrong” choices.

      Mothers are never going to make any real advances in improving the extent of their options and the qaulity of their lives while they’re at each others throats and throwing stones at each other. Mothers are just so damn judgmental of each other. It’s appalling, and it harms new mothers greatly to be be castigated for making decisions that others don’t agree with. It’s one of the reasons that so many new mothers become socially isolated and profoundly depressed. For the sake of new mothers around the country, these Mummy Wars need to stop.

    • Breast is Best says:

      11:25am | 08/05/10

      Catherine I find your diatribe completely over the top. At the end of the day it is about choice and no matter how difficult the choice it is still a choice.
      As for this continued BS about support, support, support. I had a very traumatic break up during my first pregnancy and managed to breastfeed for 12 months despite cracked nipples and problems with latching on. I had no support. Of course it was much easier with my second child as I had support but I’m so sick of capable women making long winded excuses. We all have sob stories in our life, it is how we deal with them that matters most.

    • Rebecca says:

      07:22am | 08/05/10

      Rita, when you say “Successful women are more likely to persist with breastfeeding” what exactly do you mean by ‘successful’? Do you mean educated or rich or a career woman? Is that what it means to be a ‘success’ as a woman?

    • Babble says:

      11:09pm | 07/05/10

      Judging by the shrill responses this article has generated I’d say that the author was right on the money. Everyones got an excuse & sob story but the stats don’t lie. All the support hasn’t improved the stats so let’s find another way of tackling the issue.

    • New Mum of 1 says:

      09:36pm | 07/05/10

      I am a new mother of a 14 week baby girl and throughout the pregnancy I was for breastfeeding, however to those who have never tried, it isnt as easy as it looks. My daughter was jaundiced and was put onto formula top ups as I did not have enough milk to help her get through the jaundice. Also I was lucky to get enough milk to feed her once a day. I tried expressing, however when you express for 20 mins and only get 10mls, how in the world is this new baby supposed to get the full feeds they deserve. I went to a breastfeeding clinic and was given tablets to make more milk, but after doing some research, decided not to take them as many doctors recommend against them. So I then made the decision to formula feed my baby girl. Nobody should be made to feel bad about making this decision, yet society’s opions had me guilty and depressed that I was unable to provide for my little girl. To those who think this decision is lazy, have never been in this awkward position and do not have the right to judge those who have had to turn to the bottle. My baby is not suffering, she is healthy, content and sleeps well through the night. This also allows me to be refreshed and more alert to her needs the next day. Also those who believe what I have done is wrong, come and speak to my husband, who loves to feed our baby and bond with her. There are pros and cons for both and to those in the WHO (males??) do not judge a non breastfeeding mother, she has probably beaten herself up enough without your two cents worth.

    • Jen says:

      02:40am | 12/05/10

      To Lactivista:
      “You were given bad advice and insufficient support….
      “It sounds like you chose not to breastfeed to me.”

      These two statements are inconsistent.  If you feel this young woman was given bad advice and insufficient support, then she could not have “chosen” not to breastfeed because she was never given a real choice.

      This article is just an over-the-top, inflammatory piece of junk journalism that exists for no other reason than to get this author a lot of hits and comments.  Any real lactivist is actually concerned with supporting women who want to breastfeed and removing the barriers that get in her way - not tearing down the women who, for whatever reason, don’t breastfeed.

    • Lactivista says:

      10:49am | 08/05/10

      You were given bad advice and insufficient support.

      My older daughter had jaundice and was under lights. She was given a few formula top ups and I expressed a couple of times until my milk came in. Ten mls of milk in half an hour is perfectly normal in a woman just establishing breastfeeding. In fact, many women who have brilliant supplies never get much while expressing. The amount you get from expressing has zero correlation with the amount of milk able to be extracted by a healthy baby.

      Motilium (Domperidone) can be usd safely to increase your supply.

      It sounds like you chose not to breastfeed to me.

    • Sair says:

      09:31pm | 07/05/10

      As a mother of three who has breastfed all her children until at least 2 years of age I find this article ridiculous. The research shows that children who are breastfed might achieve an IQ of 7 points higher than a bottle fed child and the only proven health benefits are a likelihood of not contracting gastro in the first 6 months. While both those things are to be desired if a mother is finding it difficult to breastfeed or if her lifestyle (work commitments etc.) prohibits it I don’t see why she should make herself miserable trying to conform to the notion that ‘breast is best’ when formula is an excellent alternative.

      A mother’s mental health is not to be trivialised under the umbrella of ‘selfishness’. If a woman chooses to feed her baby formula for whatever reason - including because she does not wish to breastfeed - her right to do so should be respected.

    • cass says:

      09:19pm | 07/05/10

      Actually I think the article is way off the money. Most women stop breast feeding as part of going back to work.

      So the NSW public service is doing a great thing, by supporting women to express milk at work. If only the Federal public service would get on board too.

      If it were easier to express milk or breastfeed in workplaces or shops, more women would feed for longer. Not everyone can afford to take a year off work, and most people don’t want to be stuck at home for a year either.c

    • AngryAtBreastIsBestNazi says:

      09:06pm | 07/05/10

      I stopped breastfeeding my oldest son at 2 weeks old because he was vomiting blood. My blood. I bottle fed my youngest because I could not go through that again. Not breastfeeding was difficult. Every instinct in my body screamed at me to keep doing it and I would cry because I felt like I was starving my children, even if they were happily full and fast asleep, but the pain was too much and the thought of blood-drinking babies was a little too freakish for me. My children are happy, healthy, bright and definitely not obese. To any who wish to criticise my parenting, I’m sure I could find many, many things I don’t agree with the raising of just about everyone’s children. Breast is best? Definitely. Embrace it. Raise your own children according to your beliefs. Stop trying to make other mums feel bad about themselves, that’s what dads and postnatal depression are for.

    • Monica says:

      08:59pm | 07/05/10

      I have three children breastfed the first 2 for 18 months each.I went through alot to do so, infective mastitis more times than I can count on my hands. To cut a long story short I breastfed my third child until my second bout of Mastitis kicked in at 8 weeks and then I weaned. I cried and cried, felt like a failure as I did everything to try and prevent mastitis.

      He is now 21 months old and to my surprise and delight has always been healthy. I could not tell the difference. Coming from both sides bottle feeding is so much easier and convenient so I can so see why Mum’s do not even bother trying to breastfeed. Sad but reality. I loved breastfeeding and missed being able to nurture my third baby like I did my other two children but I loved the freedom of formula. I’m just saying .......

    • Emma says:

      08:57pm | 07/05/10

      and these do gooding breastfeeders will be seen sitting in mcdonalds watching their 3yr old eating a happy meal…. but there will be no blog about that..

    • Bon says:

      03:39pm | 09/05/10

      Wanna bet?  Breastfeeding mothers are no more likely to take care of their child’s nutrition after weaning than mums who bottlefed.

    • oh please says:

      02:49pm | 08/05/10

      ahahah what? I very much doubt it!  I believe breast feeding mothers look after their childs nutritional needs more than bottle feeding mothers. Breastfeeding can be hard and many who persist have done it through pain and inconvenience for the best of their child.  This reminds me of what I saw the other day at the shops, a bottle feeding mother filling up her babies bottle with pepsi! I doubt any breast feeding mum would ever do that.

    • Judy says:

      07:34pm | 07/05/10

      I breastfed both my children for 6 months, the second failure-to-thrive baby having both formula and breast on the suggestion of the paediatrician.

      To those saying they’ve not come across men who gave them a hard time for breastfeeding, I have. One was an elderly gentleman giving me the death-stare for discreetly feeding in a shopping centre - he got the death-stare right back. I can accept his discomfort because of his age but there was no way I was going to feed my baby in some dirty public toilet.

      The other incident was more disturbing. A male security guard - who certainly should have known better - at one of the government-owned national attractions in Canberra asked me to move into their (admittedly very nicely equipped) mothers’ room as it apparently wasn’t appropriate for me to be feeding where people could see. That, I wouldn’t ignore - I doubt he’s ever dared to even look sideways at a breastfeeding mother again after the fuss I kicked up. If people really want mothers to breastfeed, then there’s still a lot of public education needed.

      Cheers,

    • jess says:

      07:23pm | 07/05/10

      you notice some of the most supportive comments on here have been from men? smile

    • AH says:

      07:14pm | 07/05/10

      Are you kidding me??  What kind of idiot wrote this article?? I have two children and the first one was only breastfed for 8 weeks, the next I lasted for 3 months.  They are the healthiest children you have ever seen.  The fact is, breastfeeding is a nightmare.  I dread it more than childbirth.  Bleeding nipples are something you need to experience to appreciate.  To this day I do not enjoy my breasts being touched by my husband because of the trauma of breastfeeding.  My children are lucky I lasted as long as I did,  I hated the whole experience even though I adore my children.  I am not selfish and I do not apologise for it.  I would love someone to dare call me selfish to my face for this reason, I would have a field day.  Also breastfeeding is all very well when you have loads of help and time but if you don’t, trying to combine it with childcare and cooking etc is extremely stressful.

    • Samantha Sainsbury says:

      07:05pm | 07/05/10

      How dare you make such broad generalisations. I have been unable to breastfeed both of my children for more than 6 weeks in the first instance and then five months with my second child.
      When I say “unable” let me explain….I would attempt to breastfeed for around 40 minutes, before then connecting a supply line to my breasts in order to extend the feed and improve my supply. I would then need to top up the feed with a bottle (as weight gains in the bubs were not great) and would finish by expressing on a machine for 30 minutes. Of course, then came the sterilising of all the equipment I had used. I would do this at every feed however I was unable to build or mantain an adequate supply.
      I would have done anything to have been able to breastfeed according to the WHO guidelines, and as I write this response, I am sobbing as my five month old girl is, as of two weeks ago, bottle fed.
      I can not deal with the grief and loss of not being able to breastfeed.
      So I finish my response by repeating my opening comment .....how dare you. You have no idea what I am going through and how much my heart is breaking. I wonder how many other women are brought to tears by your insensitive comments. You should be ashamed.

    • Danielle says:

      09:58pm | 11/05/10

      You poor thing. It was two years ago and I had a similar response.

      You will feel better in time, the super human effort you have put in is remarkable. I did the same things, supply lines, lactaction consultants, medication, teas, water, almonds, expressing - I just never made enough and the stupid breastfeeding nazis had me so duped that I let my 3month old drop to just under 5pounds (born 6pounds) before I realised starving my child to death was very stupid for an educated woman and started topping up with formula. I comp fed til she was 18 months old and there was not a drop left in me.

      The grief and loss eases and is usually replaced with anger at the breastfeeding nazis.

    • ellie may says:

      07:00pm | 07/05/10

      Rita I have to say I was thoroughly disgusted by your article and found the tone of it to be nothing more than a bitchy ‘opinion’ piece. For goodness sake when are people going to start laying off mothers. To say that a woman is being “selfish” if she doesn’t breast feed her child and chooses not to continue to carry the “burden” of breastfeeding is purely and simply overtly simplistic. I breastfed my child for the most part for close to a year. I found it to be incredibly stressful and, whilst I love my son, a real impact on my sense of personal space and emotionally demanding. Working as a consultant enabled me to work part time and whilst I had access to breastfeeding “facilities” I chose not to use them because, quite frankly, the thought of using a “first aid room” with a stinking couch and a crappy curtain and that had become what seemed to be a dingey storage room just didn’t seem like an appropriate option. Neither did the toilets. So I put up with the pain of aching breasts until I managed to make it home to meet my “responsibilities”. To be honest using formula on occasion as a top up feed or supplement was the one thing that saved my sanity and kept me breastfeeding longer. You didn’t consider these types of issues, because it probably wasn’t convenient to your catty poor excuse for a journalistic article. Way to support the sisterhood.

    • Juju says:

      06:11pm | 07/05/10

      ‘the NSW public service had granted new mums 60 minutes per day, over and above their allocated meal breaks, to breastfeed or express milk in a private room furnished with a refrigerator for their exclusive use’.

      Great, NSW taxpayers foot the bill for more public service privileges. If they want to breastfeed, let them do it in their own time.

    • Your name: Just me. says:

      04:12am | 10/05/10

      I suppose you would prefer for NSW tax payers to foot the bill for more children’s hospitals?

    • Suzie says:

      05:12pm | 07/05/10

      I’m breastfeeding my 6 month old daughter, but I know of people who are bottle feeding that would have loved to continue. all but one of my friends tried to breastfeed, but only a fraction of them succeeded to do it for more than a few weeks. When a child is throwing up because your nipples are so cracked they’re bleeding into the milk, or when you’re baby won’t latch and you are struggling to express enough, and the pressures bring placed on you for failing and exhaustion are not only affecting your health but your ability to mother effectively then these are all very good reasons to turn to formula.  Please only call the ones selfish that CHOOSE not to try, but please don;t attack the ones who try and fail - it’s irresponsible of a newspaper to do that for the sake of a story.

    • Amy says:

      09:18pm | 07/05/10

      Suzie your awesome and I couldn’t agree with you more! I have four children, all of whom I attempted to breast feed but to no avail.  After seeing lactation consultants, local midwives and going to the early childhood clinic to ask what I was doing wrong I still had no answers.  My second child was six weeks premature so in this case I tried everything - I began to feel very depressed.  It wasn’t until I had my fourth baby that I met a head lactation consultant who had been doing studies on various breast conditions - I was diagnosed with a breast condition that would never allow me to breast feed my babies properly.  This condition occurs in 2% of women and after seeing so many different people it was a relief to know that I wasn’t a complete failure, which is how a lot of nursing/medical staff make you feel if you do not breast feed.  In my case and I’m sure in the case of many others it’s not about “Breast is Best” - it’s about “Best is Best”.  What’s best for mum and bub!

    • Amber says:

      05:06pm | 07/05/10

      So many of the same tired excuses of cracked nipples and other harrowing tales. How come Sweden has more that triple our rate of breastfeeding? Do Swedish women have better qualities boobies?! I wish women would take responsibility for their own choices. If you choose not to breastfeed then own it and stop blaming everything and everyone else. 

      We need more judgement not less. That is the only way to improve the situation just it was harsh judgement that improved women binge drinking whilst pregnant.

    • Lauren says:

      10:29pm | 07/05/10

      Riiiight. Do you know what else Sweden has? A really high home-birth rate and a midwifery system that supports natural birth. If a woman has a natural, drug-free birth, the baby and mother are ready to begin breastfeeding almost straight after the baby comes out, and everything goes remarkably better. For the breastfeeding relationship, the first hour is VERY important. If the mother or baby is drugged, latching is hard, sucking is probably poor and the mother is probably traumatised or tired instead of floating on some awesome post-birth endorphins and other hormones. I’ve had two births- one all drugged with a baby that took 4 months to learn to breastfeed properly, cracked nipples, mastitis several times, thrush etc etc and one drug-free that had the baby latched on, pain-free from the get-go and NO complications since. Women need to know that their birth experience affects the breastfeeding relationship. And no, judgement for something that is inflicted upon women by a poor maternity system, lack of support and lack of information is NOT needed.

    • Bon says:

      04:58pm | 07/05/10

      Yay, yet another ‘let’s kick mothers’ column.  We get too much money from the government, we take too much time off work, we take not enough time off work and selfishly leave our children in daycare, we don’t breastfeed for long enough, we breastfeed for too long, our children are brats because we neglect them, we are “smug”, our prams are too big, we have too many parents with prams parking spaces at the shops, we dare to take our children out in public anywhere were there is the slightest chance that another person may be annoyed by their presence…I have heard it all on The Punch, both from the writers and the commenters.

    • Lyn says:

      04:44pm | 07/05/10

      Alex C at 3.59pm - perfectly put.
      Perhaps more people would breastfeed if the breastfeeding brigade knocked off the BS. Perhaps those same old scare tactics worked on younger mums, but maybe todays older and a little less intimidated mum questions the uniformed idiot who spouts such nonsense as ‘breastfed children recording higher IQ scores and far less likely to be overweight or obese as adults’.
      I CHOSE not to breastfeed and my children are intelligent and sporty (not overweight) and are so because of a lot of other choices we made (and genetics and luck).
      Guilt doesn’t help anyone - guilt is why some children are over weight I am sure, so stop it - stop being part of the problem and be part of the solution - support your sister, don’t condemn her, guide her don’t shun her. But mostly just grow up.
      I was also able to choose to stay home with my children (suits me but not everyone), but I suppose if you didn’t do that - it wouldn’t count for much.

    • Emma says:

      09:17pm | 07/05/10

      You call yourself better informed and educated? You actually made me laught out loud with your ignorance and head in the sand attitude. If you want to give your kids formula instead of what nature intended then fine, they are your kids but please don’t delude yourself in to thinking you are doing the best for them.

      Also before calling someone who is actually informed an idiot perhaps you should do a bit of research. You would find that there are hundreds of scientific studies in the benefits of breastfeeding. Breastfed babies do actually record higher IQs and are less likely to be fat…FACT. That doesn’t mean every formula baby will be fat but they are more likely to be.

      If you were better informed you would know that women who are older and highly educated are far more likely to breast feed than every other group.

    • New Parent says:

      04:34pm | 07/05/10

      It’s supposed to be a free country, mothers should be allowed to chose how they feed their children without authors, and other self opinionated pathetic soles trying to tell everyone how to live their lives and make their decisions for them. To all those people here is a tip, mind your own business, and look after your own children. If it’s not baby formula, it’s dummies, disposable nappies or heaven forbid elective Caesars’ some do gooder is bleating on about how we shouldn’t use them. Well I am a new father and I can categorically confirm that the damage done by judgemental types writing articles like this, to my wifes mental health is far more destructive than feeding a child, baby formula will ever be. So but out of other peoples lives, cause it really is not up to you how mothers feed their children.

    • Richard says:

      04:24pm | 07/05/10

      Interesting approach, given that the WHO themselves state that “support for mothers is essential (Fact 8, of the 10 facts on breastfeeding).”  Further, studies show that 5-25% of women suffer postpartum depression.  So just why you would choose to equate formula feeding to smoking while pregnant (which, btw, about 15% of women do…not a word from you on that) is beyond me.  The last thing a new mother needs to feel is shame.

      My wife breastfed our children to the WHO guidelines, but felt lucky to be able to do so with minimal health issues.  Some of her friends weren’t so lucky, and became stressed at the pressure they were put under to “get it right and get over the pain.”  They found watching their baby coughing up blood from cracked nipples very distressing, and when they moved to formula, they developed a much closer and stress-free bond with their child at feeding time.  It may not have worked for the WHO, but it worked for them.

      I would have thought that all mothers, whether breast-feeding or bottle-feeding, would like to think that their every move isn’t being judged by others.  It strikes me as a little ironic that bottle-feeding mothers now appear subjected to the same tut-tutting that breast-feeding mothers have endured in public.  So much for supporting our mothers.

    • Nicole says:

      04:15pm | 07/05/10

      Alright, I expect to be hung, drawn and quartered for what I am about to say but here it goes. I apologise for being slightly off topic.

      Breastfeeding is completely natural - yes & I will not argue that point.
      I also have no issues with babies being fed in public, at restaurants, cafes and so on - they have to eat.

      However, if you are breastfeeding in public is it so wrong to take in consideration that other people do not want to see your boobs out in the open?

      This is my issue with breastfeeding:

      My sister in law sprouts about how she will breastfeed her daughter (now 1) till at least 2. My niece has several teeth and eats whole foods (sausages, crackers, apples and so on). To be honest I don’t understand what value my niece is getting from breast milk when she eats proper meals. Hopefully this will make sense to me when I become a mother.

      When we go out for lunch or dinner and if my niece is upset or fidgeting she gets a nipple shoved in her mouth then falls asleep on the breast. To me this seems like a way of keeping her quiet more than anything else. Obviously she will break the seal and my sister in law will sit there with her breast exposed and wonders why none of us (yes all family) want to look at her when she is talking. Understandably it is somewhat awkward for my husband or his other brothers to see his sisters breasts essentially swinging in the breeze.

      If more people were asked, I suspect the issue would not be breastfeeding in public as such but abut mothers expecting everyone to be comfortable seeing their bare breasts.

    • Corben says:

      07:26am | 10/05/10

      OMG not a bare breast…how disgusting!
      It’s not like you don’t see barely covered breasts everywhere anyway…much rather see them comfort a child (whatever their age) than be used to sell lads mags.

    • AB says:

      04:10pm | 07/05/10

      Rita - i feel your article contributes to the poor breastfeeding rates in our country as you seem to think breastfeeding is a burden. I agree that only a very small percentage of women cannot breastfeed, but many women would love to breastfeed, but go unsupported. By this, i mean well meaning family and friends (and perhaps journalists writing for the Punch) make comments such as bottle feeding enables you to drink and gives you freedom and you can not have any form of contraception. These are all myths. What about the convenience of having the best form of nutrition available to your child in the form of Breastmilk that is at the perfect temperature and sterile. No need to wash bottles and wait for formula to be mixed up.  Women also go unsupported due to not having enough information available to them about breastfeeding and methods to increase supply.  Breastfeeding has been a wonderful experience for me and i urge any mothers or mothers to be needing some advice about breastfeeding to contact the Australian Breastfeeding Association.

    • Peter says:

      03:56pm | 07/05/10

      Yeah, I agree, breast feeding is the way to go… I’m ready if anyone else is??

      Just joking, i think doing things as nature intended is the best way. I don’t object to public feeding, if a woman can do it discreetly, she should, and if she can’t discreetly, then she can do in public, no problems there…. But what we don’t need is Kate Lambrooks doing on TV for some attention..

    • Peter says:

      09:44am | 10/05/10

      On TV Lauren? What’s a baby of breast feeding age doing in the work place to begin with? She knew it would get hungry.. It was for attention and it was planned.. It just demeaned the act of breast feeding.. If she walked a couple of metres off the camera to do it (and even if the camera showed her doing it for a few seconds), she would have gained more respect. She used her baby and breastfeeding for some attention… I haven’t seen other female TV personalities with a desperate need to breast feed on TV.. Kate so far has been the only one in the world..

    • Lauren says:

      10:20pm | 07/05/10

      Don’t be silly. A woman can’t make a baby feed to get attention if it isn’t hungry- it’ll just get fussy and wonder why a boob is being shoved in it’s face. Her baby was hungry, and trust me, when your baby is hungry, you don’t think about getting attention, you just want to grab it and feed it!

    • Mum of 2 says:

      03:45pm | 07/05/10

      Rita, you should be deeply, deeply ashamed of yourself.

    • anne says:

      10:32pm | 07/05/10

      I completely agree with Mum of 2 and everyone else who sees this article for what it is! I can’t believe people are arguing over this LAZY, good-for-nothing, unresearched nonsense. She obviously hasn’t spoken to a midwife or lactation consultant, or even a breast-feeding mum, and if breast-feeding is “covered at length” in ante-natal classes this would be news to most actual attendees. That’s part of the problem - women aren’t told about the problems initiating breast-feeding in case it “puts them off” . Instead they are told (often by young educators who haven’t had children) that anyone can, and “its easy”. Many mums like myself found it worth persevering but damned hard work to establish. It IS a learned response for both mum and baby. If women were alerted to this they’d be more prepared for any problems.

    • FiR says:

      03:42pm | 07/05/10

      I breast fed my son for 4 months but had so many problems doing it (he refused to latch on ninety-percent of the time due to inverted nipples) it made me resent him and have post natal depression. For my own mental health I had to give up breast feeding but the guilt involved by the breast feeding brigade was hard to take. It wasn’t until my sister said to me ‘It’s your baby and you do what you want with it’ that I started to forgive myself. It’s all about individual choice and the mother has the right to decide. Some people don’t like to immunise their child, others don’t believe in dummies etc etc. As an aside, my IQ is 132 and weight is fine, and so is my sister’s (her IQ is over 150), and we were both bottle fed with cow’s milk. It doesn’t make too much difference in the big scheme of things.

    • Notnerb says:

      03:40pm | 07/05/10

      What a crock. Breastfeeding is the the biggest bit of status posturing that women have, second only to the natural/caesarian birth question. It’s the female equivalent of fast cars for blokes. Breastfeeding is more convenient & portable than bottles and that’s it. Health benefits are overblown. It is purely about trying to prove that you are better than your fellow mothers, when in the long run it makes absolutely no difference at all. You’re all too busy showing off about it to admit that you are focussed on your own status as a mother, rather than REALLY caring about and loving the child.

    • Samantha says:

      03:37pm | 07/05/10

      “the selfishness of mothers”?  Seriously who are you kidding?.  My mother bottle fed all three of us, we’re all highly educated and not obese.  More to the point, she got pregnant against medical advice.  She risked her life to give birth to us. What a selfish bitch she was for not breast feeding.

      Really, are we still on this bandwagon?  If mother and baby are both healthy and happy, isn’t that the most important thing?

    • Brett H says:

      03:30pm | 07/05/10

      What an important subject with such far-reaching social implications, and what a shame it is so poorly written.  Perhaps the writer is audioning for a Creative Writing assignment for ACA or Today Tonight.  I have some personal feelings on the subject of Breast Feeding but can’t be bothered sharing them due to the fact that my rage of what passes as Jounalistic Intent and Execution in the contemporary media is so overwhelming!  The sooner you people start charging for content the better!  Then we will only have to put up with such underwhelming mediocrity in the unemployment queue!  What a wasted opportunity!

    • mumof1 says:

      03:07pm | 07/05/10

      I successfully breastfed my son for 18 months and am hoping that I will succeed in breastfeeding my twins, due in approximately 3 months. However, I find articles like this one offensive, judgmental and extremely unhelpful.
      I fail to see the ‘selfishness’ of mothers to be the root of the problem, as a matter of fact I am yet to come across a mother who decided not to breastfeed for the reasons cited in the article. Most mothers I have met and who did not breastfeed, or not for very long, have a harrowing tale to tell about problems like mastitis, cracked nipples, pain, having the guilt trip laid on them by health professionals because their babies weren’t putting on weight at the expected rate, being pressured by said health professionals to comp feed or put the baby on formula full time - in general lack of support and lack of education.  While both are available, it can be hard for a new mother experiencing problems to find out where to go and what questions to ask and often advice given by different people is contradictory.
      There is also a huge amount of pressure, financial and societal, for mothers to return to work. So while this latest initiative doesn’t solve the problem, I believe it is a step in the right direction, allowing mothers that do return to work an environment in which it is easier to continue to breastfeed. If we as a society become more tolerant and accommodating of breastfeeding, it can only help mothers with this at times difficult and exhausting task.

    • Rajiv says:

      03:07pm | 07/05/10

      Always good to see peoples opinions on topics like this. I’m male. I dont have children. I work in an industry where I dont want kids in the workplace. Frankly it would be irresponsible of women to bring kids here. This government decision is just a complete feministic joke. KIDS have no place in the workplace. I dont care less about the breatfeeding issue. I didn’t join a workforce to have someone’s bassinette lying around. Nor some kid squarking all day long. I dont bring a dog to work. I’m not saying women should be stay at home mothers, so don’t jump on that bandwagon, but dont you dare bring kids to a place of business or work - unless its your own small family business. Just plain ridiculous.

    • JO says:

      05:27pm | 07/05/10

      They’re not talking about having kids in the workplace. Simply setting up a room for workers to express milk.

    • Lyn says:

      05:07pm | 07/05/10

      I agree, but I think they are talking about places with built in creches or expressing when not possible, but more to the point why shouldn’t all the male workers, or the women who choose not to have babies get the same break?  There seems to be double standards developing here. This is OK while its only public servants - its only wasting our tax dollars (which would be wasted one way or another anyway) but out in the real world, this is the sort of thing that would make employing a young woman less appealing and less cost effective that the male counterpart, something that small businesses can’t afford.

    • AlexC says:

      02:59pm | 07/05/10

      Here’s the only thing you need to know about raising babies. Love them.
      That is IT.

      The nuances and variables and and"my way is better than yours” mean absolutely nothing in the end.  No 30 year old has ever turned around and cried “if only Mum had breastfed me/bottlefed me/swathed me in cloth nappies/raised me on organic pureed turnips my life would be so much better.” If your parents love you, they do whatever they believe is best for you and that love is all that counts in the end.

      I pity your children - you’ll doubtless make their lives hell with your overbearing moralising for the rest of their lives.

    • Jonathan says:

      04:38pm | 07/05/10

      I agree. I’m so sick of the guilt placed on mothers who choose not to breastfeed.  Mothers have a difficult enough time as it is, without being hounded by the breast-feeding lobby that they obviously are being selfish if they choose not to breast feed.  Are parents who send their children to lower ranking schools equally selfish for not living in better suburbs?  You would think it was child abuse not to breastfeed the way some dogmatic people go on about it…

    • maz says:

      02:51pm | 07/05/10

      Until we have comprehensive paid maternity leave for all then mothers are going to be put in a heart wrenching situation of having to decide on returning to work whilst their baby is still on the breast or not paying the mortgage/rent. Where is the selfishness in that?
      Express i hear some cry well for many womening expressing itself is difficult and just not possible where they work (unless you happen to work in the NSW public service). And lets get real here how many husbands are able to bring the baby in for lunchtime feeds?

      Berrating women for their selfishness in these situations does no one any favours, more support (for city and country) is what is needed.

    • Nathan says:

      02:51pm | 07/05/10

      What men said it was disgusting? I’ve never met a man who doesn’t like copping an eyeful of a bare breast, and seeing one performing it natural function is just even more beautiful.  My wife was lucky enough to be able to breast feed all our four children, and main reason she stopped each time around 6-10 months was because it removes weight so quickly that I was afraid there would be nothing left of my beautiful wife, so I begged her to stop.  Its a shame women put them selves under so much pressure to breast feed.  I do believe that breast feeding is better than formula, but baby needs mum to be feeling good about herself, and if its too hard, or causing too many problems than mum should be allowed to make a guilt free choice not to breast feed.  But women are just too critical of each other - ARENT YOU.

    • Kylie says:

      08:13pm | 08/05/10

      Women are not all critical of each other Nathan. I think you will find a lot of supportive comments from women on this thread.
      Many women give and receive amazing support to each other.

    • Natalie says:

      02:47pm | 07/05/10

      I am one of the women who couldn’t breastfeed for medical reasons and about to have another baby who will be bottle fed.  There is such an overwhelming pressure put on women to breastfeed to the point that those of us that can’t are made to feel incredibly guilty and judged whenever we produce a bottle in public.  It is sad to think that in this day and age that we can’t accept that not everyone can breastfeed and only support given to those who do.  I think all women and mothers should have support and guidance after having children.  Unfortunately those of us who can’t breastfeed end up not going to see the Early Childhood Centres due to their lack of support.

    • New mum says:

      02:42pm | 07/05/10

      I am a new mum and only “breastfed” my baby for 7 weeks. What I mean by that is he would not take to my breast so I had to express & bottle feed him. Now if you take into account that he was 2 mths prem, spent 5 weeks in hospital, I was sick with an infected tooth and running back & forward from the hospital, I think I did quite fine. He’s now a happy healthy 9mth old that’s putting on heaps of weight & you wouldn’t have known he was prem.  What I don’t agree with about breastfeeding in public is women who just “flop” out the boob & don’t do it descretly. There was a lady in the supermarket last night walking around doing her shopping with her shirt up around her neck while feeding her toddler. I have no problem with any mum feeding their bub in public but at least try to do it with a little bit of discretion, unfortunately there is still a stigma attached to this natural behaviour. Especially for men & people of the older generation because it was never done in their day. It should be up to the individual if they chose to breastfeed because there is alot of emotions and pressure that go with. Men should keep their mouth shut…if they can’t do it then they shouldn’t have an opinion believe me it’s safer for them. Same should be said for childbirth, pms and weight gain after childbirth!

    • JM says:

      01:14pm | 10/05/10

      again Jez, bottle feeding doesn’t include exposed bits, you don’t need to be discrete when bottle feeding as there is no body part exposed, think of other people’s comfort not wanting to see your saggy bits hanging out in a cafe or restaurant or walking in a supermarket

    • Jason01 says:

      04:42am | 09/05/10

      What on earth are you talking about? I never heard of a man complaining about a woman breastfeeding her child in public, although I have heard a lot of b*tchy comments from women. My wife breastfed our son whenever he needed feeding - but she was discreet. I think you have the problem here.

    • Jez says:

      02:14pm | 08/05/10

      Do you bottle feed discreetly?  If not, why should a breastfeeder?  Personally I’m more offended by a plastic, artificial nipple in a baby’s mouth than a breast.

    • JM says:

      10:25am | 08/05/10

      not hidden jane just be discreet, you don’t have to go to a dark room but don’t whip it out in the middle of say a cafe, bottle feeding doesn’t include public nakedness, use a cloth nappies as a burp cloth and have it draped, or use a baby wrap or bunny rug to have over baby’s head. Have some consideration for people’s comfort level especially in a restaurant or cafe, not saying don’t do it, just a little thought to others. And before you say anything I have 3 kids all breastfed and when I was out I didn’t need to go to a dark corner just draped a wrap over my shoulder and covered baby’s head so they could feed and I didn’t make others uncomfortable.

    • Jane says:

      03:54pm | 07/05/10

      New Mum, you are still buying int the idea that breasts are somehow dirty objects connected to sex. Why should a breastfed baby have to “be fed discreatly” when a baby on the bottle can be fed anywhere, anytime?

      If it’s a natural behaviour as you say, then why demand that it be hidden?

    • angela, no breastfeeding mum says:

      02:42pm | 07/05/10

      I know plenty of high and might breastfeeding mums who have gone onto giving their children tin food and takeaway.  What hypercrits!  My two year old daughter is a very strong happy, healthy and intelligent girl who has been bought up on well balanced nutritious home cooked meals.  Dont tell me Im selfish and lazy.

    • Rebecca says:

      02:26pm | 07/05/10

      What the hell happened to us? wouldn’t it be nice if just once mothers supported each other and women stuck together?

    • Disgusted says:

      02:48pm | 07/05/10

      I agree Rebecca.
      Another blow has been struck by the self-appointed breastfeeding gestapo.

      I have a friend who was pushed to the brink of post-natal depression because of the pressure that was put on her to breastfeed by know-nothing know-it-alls (it’s not as if she wasn’t trying either). How does that benefit her baby?

    • Pete says:

      02:22pm | 07/05/10

      My wife suffered pretty bad mastitis (spelling?) with bub 1. She got a couple of weeks milk in, then in tears, sweating and shaking, she sent me off to the shops to buy her some formula and bottles.
      There are so many “well informed” do-gooders around pointing fingers at women like my wife, who need to be told quite frankly to mind their own business, and I take great pleasure in doing it.
      Yes we know that breast is best, but it’s lucky there are other options when the mother and child’s needs asks for it.

    • Maxine says:

      02:22pm | 07/05/10

      Grow up people.  It’s not always a mothers selfishness.  My son COULD NOT breastfeed after a difficult birth.  I persisted with it - and after a week I had a very hungry baby.  Which of course the nurses were only too happy to blame me for!!  He ended up being a bottle baby - I figured better that then he starve to death.
      I think all you people pointing fingers should mind your own business.  I met someone not quite as strong as me who ended up with severe PND because she couldn’t breast feed.  The social pressure was unbearable for her.

    • Karen says:

      02:21pm | 07/05/10

      As a young mum pregnant with her first I thought I’d share my views. I have every intention of breastfeeding if I can, BUT on the same token I need to put baby’s health and well being first. If baby and I are struggling with breastfeeding even after getting what help is available (we live in a remote area where all those lovely city resources, like specialist breastfeeding midwives, aren’t available), then I will turn to bottle feeding. Surely the main goal is to have a happy healthy baby? How can a stressed out mum who thinks of herself as a failure for being unable to breast feed her baby be the best thing for that baby?

      Breast is better, but bottle is better than nothing. If women are having such trouble that the end result is that baby is continually unsated then how can turning to the bottle be bad? Every mum instinctively wants to do the best for her child, and if she chooses the bottle then it’s because she feels that it is the best recourse for her baby.  Society should get off their high horse and stop criticising her for making the best choice she felt she could under the circumstances.

    • Cecilia says:

      06:23pm | 09/05/10

      Well said Karen & New Mum,

      In an ideal world, we would all breastfeed but the reality is life isn’t ideal.  I too had these ideals but when when I was sobbing in pain, literally bleeding from my inverted nipples that my baby couldn’t latch onto and the thought of throwing myself under a bus was preferable to the agony of putting her on my nipples, my husband said enough was enough.  Then I was made to feel the worst person in the world.  How can putting yourself through absolute agony be deemed unselfish?  It’s called martydom.  I was older and wiser for my other two and put them on the bottle.  Guess what?  None of them are stupid, obese and they were all ridiculously heathly.

      Motherhood is hard enough without judgemental comments like this writer’s.  If you can breastfeed, congratulations, I envy you.  If not, you’re not a bad mother.  We all love our babies, breastfed or not.  Best of luck, Karen.

    • bridget says:

      03:25pm | 07/05/10

      Can’t agree more well said.

    • New mum says:

      02:57pm | 07/05/10

      Good on you Karen, I hope you have more success than I did. There is alot of pressure especially by hospital staff to breastfeed. I always stuck to my guns & never let the midwives or nurses tell me what was best for my baby. I bottlefed my son on breastmilk for 7 weeks until my milk dried up & the comments from some of the nurses really pissed me off. Especially when they tried to tell me I was trying hard enough. ALWAYS do whatever is best for YOU and YOUR BABY, NEVER let anyone put you down and make you feel like your doing your baby an injustice by not breastfeeding. Good luck with everything and I hope you have a wonderful healthy bub.

    • Shane From Melbourne says:

      02:20pm | 07/05/10

      Doesn’t matter if they grant 60 extra minutes for breastfeeding, the NSW public service doesn’t work anyway…...

    • just my opinion says:

      02:15pm | 07/05/10

      I am a male and i support breastfeeding 0 my dughter is breastfed and i cant beleive this is even an issue. the point people fail to realise is that before formula we fed babies pretty much exclusively on breast milk and since formula has come into play there have been more infant diseases created. breastmilk is created by the body for the baby as a necessary human function. Its like saying im going to not breath freely but wear an oxygen tank and breath through that.

    • M says:

      10:14am | 08/05/10

      also pollution and radiation in things like microwaves not to mention Chernobyl that had a hand in it, you can’t claim that not breastfeeding causes infant diseases

    • FiR says:

      03:52pm | 07/05/10

      I think you’ll find before formula babies were given cow’s milk, not exclusively breast fed. Breast feeding has gone in and out of fashion over the years and when I was born (1969) bottle feeding was the done thing.

    • Paul says:

      02:11pm | 07/05/10

      My partner has breastfed all three of our children.  She would feed them anywhere/anytime.  The only negative comments/dissapproving looks we received were from other women.  Never from a man.

    • Brett L says:

      07:56pm | 08/05/10

      Those disapproving looks from women were more about envy than disapproving. Good on your partner for doing the right thing.

    • Juju says:

      09:10pm | 08/05/10

      ‘moms’ ?

    • Doctor No says:

      01:59pm | 07/05/10

      We live in a modern where absolutely everything is sexualised so it is never surprising to me that a women breastfeeding in public seems to create a lot of comment - my mother has strongly negative views on the practice for example!!! 

      It’s your body so choose what is best for you - struggling through days / months of stress filled and / or painful breatfeeding may not be in your baby’s best interest.

      And don’t be fooled by the often quoted data out there supporting the benefits of breastfeeding over bottle- they are fundamentally flawed. There is no way any study could control the infinite variables influencing childhood outcomes to produce any meaningful results.
      (Private practitioner with 20yrs experience)

    • mike j says:

      09:45pm | 07/05/10

      Predictable. You say that from the point of view of a professional whose client is the mother.

      And I wonder how many statistics electives you took in your rote-learning undergraduate medical degree. It’s either completely ignorant, or deliberately fallacious, to propose that studies are invalid because they can’t control every possible variable.

      I’m guessing completely ignorant, because you don’t even know what ‘infinite’ means.

      Don’t give up your day job.

    • Markus says:

      03:39pm | 07/05/10

      I am yet to meet a male who is against/offended by breastfeeding in public, but have met a few females.
      Funnily enough it’s your mother of all people against breastfeeding in public, who I assume breastfed you at some point.
      Is it actually females who are leading the moral outrage against public breastfeeding?

    • Ana says:

      01:58pm | 07/05/10

      “one would think that unless you want your children to grow up fat and stupid….”. I find this incredibly insulting and naive and not at all factually correct. A lot of women cannot breastfeed for certain reasons yet manage to help their child grow into a successful, healthy, productive member of society. Your attitude is disgraceful.

    • Nicole says:

      04:54pm | 07/05/10

      Agreed, Ana. My mother didn’t breastfeed me (I’m not sure if she falls into the 2-4% of medical categories, she just said she never had enough milk and it was painful or something along those lines) but she has done everything else to be an incredibly supportive mother. And as someone who is 5’2, weighs under 50kg, and is doing a very difficult degree at a prestigious university, I wouldn’t classify myself as stupid nor fat.

      Rita, your Punch profile says that you are ‘an uncompromising social commentator who is prepared to tell it like it is’. I hope you are ‘prepared to tell it like it is’ should you ever find yourself a new mother, unable to breastfeed - make sure you tell those kids of yours (in later life) how fat and stupid they are because of YOUR selfish choices. What a shameful article.

    • Proud breastfeeding mum says:

      01:56pm | 07/05/10

      I think a “softly softly” approach is better when dealing with new mothers, there IS a lot of pressure to breastfeed and it can seem very overwhelming compared to the friend next door who says “oh just put her on the bottle, mine all were bottle-fed and they turned out just fine”.  I think what needs to happen is the Australian government needs to get real about BFing retention rates and needs to realise that the more breastfed children there are, the less hospitalised children there are.  It makes good financial sense to encourage women to breastfeed their children for longer.  My son turned 4 the other day, still breastfed (I know, shock horror, I’m clearly just doing it for my own benefit, he’s clearly a clingy sooky mama’s boy who’s going to turn out to be a gay because of all the exposure to titties) (oh and BTW his word for breastmilk is BITTY :p) and he has been sick exactly 4 times in his entire life.  3 of those times was gastro, which my older child brought home from her school mates - my breastfed child recovered in less than 8 hours and did not require any additional hydration or medication.  Whereas my older child and I were bedstricken for over 24 hours and required a lot of rehydration.  That’s just anecdata but it’s good enough for me.

    • MD says:

      04:39pm | 07/05/10

      bahahahaha smile but if the wedding gets interrupted for ‘Bitty’ that’s a little too far.

      I love that show

    • AdamC says:

      01:51pm | 07/05/10

      This is a riduclous guilt-tripping lecture of an article. Not everyone can be a paragon of motherly perfection. I would much rather that families struggle through and adapt to the nature of modern life than pack it in and have no more kids.

      I am pro-mother, not pro-martyr. It is not always necessary to put kids first all the time (unless you want to raise a bunch of spoiled brats). Of course, kids are important, but so are their mums. If mum sometimes resorts to formula she doesn’t deserve a lecture from breat-feeders browbeaters!

      And there is a difference between correlation and causation. It is difficult to believe that baby formula causes obesity later in life.

    • Dani says:

      11:13am | 08/05/10

      Yes i agree.  Like the leap some people have made to thinking formula fed babies are ‘stupid?’ when in fact they probably performed one or two points lower which if high numbers might be statistically significant but not significant at all from a life perspective, in terms of life outcomes etc.  And as you point out could be from a host of other factors-like the fact that formula fed babies are more likely to be from lower socio-economic status- and besides these results would be on formula produced over 20 years ago- if we are looking at adult outcomes

    • Disgusted says:

      04:48pm | 07/05/10

      I agree 100% AdamC. Well said. “So one would think that unless you want your children to grow up fat and stupid you would heed the advice of medical professionals,” What? I have three children who I didn’t breastfeed, and I can tell you right now Missy, that none of them are ‘fat and stupid’. I would suggest that you remove yourself from that pedestal that you have put yourself on, stop being so judgemental of other women, and wake up.

    • Eric says:

      01:48pm | 07/05/10

      Are women paid for those 60 minutes of breastfeeding a day? Should they be?

      What if men took 60 minutes off to bottle-feed a baby?

    • Leo says:

      02:37pm | 07/05/10

      Eric, the point is to get babies breast-fed for longer. I guess when men can breast feed, then they can have time off to do so! This isn’t a matter of more rights for women and whether they are fair among the sexes, it is about babies being breastfed, nothing else!

    • Zeta says:

      02:22pm | 07/05/10

      I smoke 20 cigarettes during work hours at an average of 5 minutes per smoke which adds up to 100 minutes each I day I spend outside, enjoying the sun, annoying non-smokers. Sometimes I take a call while smoking, or hold a meeting with anyone willing to put up with my habit - but more often than not, I don’t and enjoy my cigarette in peace. I could feed a baby and a half in the time I skive off from work smoking, and I bet a lot of other people do too.

    • Dan the Man says:

      02:20pm | 07/05/10

      of course they should be. And so should men. just like you are probably paid for that 5 minute ciggie break you take a dozen times a day.

      If you deter this sort of thing, the only people who will reproduce is the unemployed.

    • Heléna says:

      01:35pm | 07/05/10

      it saddens me that for many women staying at home to raise their babies is not a choice they can make - I know some women make the choice to return to work happily, but for many there is no choice and while there is so much time thought and money spent on workplace reform and child care funding, I do not believe focus is placed on creating alternative work solutions or improving finances so either one parent or alternating parents can stay at home with their children

    • kate says:

      01:31pm | 07/05/10

      I breast fed my daughter for six months and I found it very difficult. I experienced masititis, cracked nipples and the external pressure by society to continue breast feeding certainly didnt assist. I found the stress of breastfeeding contributed to the post-natal depression I also experienced and felt relieved when I finally made the transition to formula. Every situation is completely different for everyone and I dont think its anyone place to judge on this topic especially when you have never experienced it yourself.

    • ceba says:

      01:29pm | 07/05/10

      Rita, it’s so not helpful to blame mothers, when they are told by advertising that formula is ‘as good’, when medicos tell them breast is best.  It’s not ‘best’, it’s NORMAL, and until we make it easier for women to stay home and BF OR work and BF if they want (like these NSW initiatives), and by supporting them PROPERLY as mothers, then we will not see raised BF rates. 
      You could more constructively in your article address why the formula industry is still advertising heavily in Australia, in spite of international codes of conduct not to, and why places like pharmacies and supermarkets sell and promote formula, which make women think it is a ‘normal’ part of mothering.
      Please help women by helping them understand why rates are so low, not by blaming them for factors way outside their control.  women do not get up and say ‘today i will be selfish’, they make the decision that is best for them at that moment.  Society needs to be more supportive of women, to let them get on with being mothers! And if you’ve got BF issues, phone ABA for pete’s sake, they will help you 24 hours a day! 1800 686 2 686

    • cg says:

      01:28pm | 07/05/10

      I am the primary income earner in my family, had to go back to work when my daughter was 8 months. Breastfed her at home but couldn’t express enough for her during the day. What other option is there apart from formula?

    • Fiona says:

      09:35am | 08/05/10

      CSH - Much of what you say rings true for me.

      Bugga this ‘guilt’ business. Do what you have to do.

      Pick the formula carefully and no cows milk before 12 mths or longer and you’re sweet. Well it worked for me.

      What I would add is that NONE of my children (now 21-10 yrs of age)  have or had any allergies. (I ‘Only’ breastfed them between 3 weeks to 3 mths)

    • CSH says:

      02:20pm | 07/05/10

      I sympathise with cg: even if a mother wants to breast feed, it is not always possible or practical. I went back to work (30 km out of town) 1 week after an emergency caesarean as I was not entitled to maternity leave and also no Centrelink entitlements since I was not unemployed. I tried to breastfeed in the lab (no other facilities)and my husband brought my son out every lunchtime for the first 5 weeks. In between I used a dirty toilet to express a dwindling milk supply. At night my son fed every 2 hours. Then my husband had to go overseas again as his visa ran out. I managed to do the “right thing” by my son for 6 months by which time we’d sit together asleep in bed at night from sheer exhaustion. The first nightly formula feed gave both of us the first uninterrupted 4 hour sleep in months. My son has since birth been in the 90th percentile for weight gain and is a healthy , smart and athletic child of 12 now. I cannot say that this must be due to the breast feeding effort I made, but I do know that most mothers are not selfish and try to do as best as they can for their children. Every situation is different and I think mothers must decide what is best for theirs without the judgements and guilt that society burdens us with.

    • Former Snag says:

      01:43pm | 07/05/10

      Your stay at home, house husband could bring the baby in to work on, off peak public transport, at lunch time for a midday feed, along with a healthy, inexpensive, brown bag lunch for you & maybe even massage your feet or shoulders while you are at it.

      Baby would then, sated, fall asleep in his arms on the way home.

    • Brett L says:

      01:25pm | 07/05/10

      Breast is best. And it’s a wonderful sight to see a young Mum breastfeeding her baby.  I’ve been around, and I’ve never heard any man complain about seeing a woman breast feed. Women can toughen their nipples with a little daily sunshine, and cold cabbage leaves usually helps with painful breastfeeding.

    • Rhonda says:

      11:48am | 08/05/10

      Brett, even without reading the breast feeding association website, I can tell you from EXPERIENCE that neither of these things does anything to help when you have mastitis.
      Suck it up cup cake.

    • Brett L says:

      07:52am | 08/05/10

      Ladies, Ladies, go and read the Breast feeding Association website before you pass sexist comments.

    • Lee says:

      10:27pm | 07/05/10

      Brett you have made my night. i am still laughing hilariously at your crazy comments. only because i know how untrue they are. mastitis is certainly not cured with cabbage leaves…..and when there is snow on the ground my boobs are certainly not going to be flashed in the vain hope of catching a little daily sunshine. good luck to you with your future breastfeeding attempts!

    • Bec says:

      03:36pm | 07/05/10

      Brett I haven’t laughed so hard in ages! - “Women can toughen their nipples with a little daily sunshine, and cold cabbage leaves usually helps with painful breastfeeding”. Oh how I wish it was that simple!

    • Jane says:

      02:38pm | 07/05/10

      Rhonda I couldn’t agree more.

      I’m assuming “Brett” that you are a male, I’m glad you know so muc about how a woman can toughen her nipples with sunshine which just so happens to be absolute rubbish.  I tried everything with both my children and neither of your tips helped whatsoever.

    • Rhonda says:

      02:04pm | 07/05/10

      Brett, when you’ve breast fed a baby, then come back and talk.  A little daily sunshine and cold cabbage leaves?  Get stuffed.  Try breast feeding a baby when you have mastitis and your breast is the size of a basket ball and as solid as concrete.  Try exposing your nipples to a little daily sunshine when it’s the middle of winter.

    • Cate of Brisbane says:

      01:21pm | 07/05/10

      What a load of rubbish! Rita, what your diatribe fails to understand is that breastfeeding is a learned skill, not an instinctive process. Saying that women are too selfish to breastfeed and there’s only 2-4 percent who are physically unable to do so fails to recognise that in Australia, we throw women out of hospital, sometimes less than 24 hours after giving birth, with very little or no ongoing support. This generation of mothers is often unable to get assistance from their own mothers, who were told in their day that ``bottle is best’‘, so they’ve got no advice to offer on breastfeeding either. I’ve had five kids, who were all breastfed, with varying degrees of success. One fed exclusively for nine months, another was less than five months. It’s not like turning on a tap, it can be really hard for mum and baby to get breastfeeding right - and yes, some babies have to be taught how to feed properly, attach well etc. This culture of blaming and shaming mothers for the choices they make has to stop. The vast majority of mothers do the very best they can for their children and its just plain wrong and completely unhelpful for everyone else to sit in judgement.

    • kel says:

      11:10am | 18/10/11

      People need to look for support if they want it. We are grown women and are capable of tracking down one of the many FREE resources in this Country… and if you don’t want to be kicked out of Hospital then maybe you should get health insurance instead of clogging up the already suffering health system…but i’m sure i will hear ALLLLLLL about how some people can’t afford it !!!!! well stop complaining about what you get for FREE !!!!!

    • Lisa says:

      09:37pm | 27/05/10

      I agree that breastfeeding is a learned skill, and that women are often discharged early, some with support some without.

      what we need is more support available with easy access in the first 6 weeks after having a baby, as it takes this long to ‘establish’ BFing.

      I don’t think we should label mothers who choose not to BF as being selfish, some will be that is true, but the majority just haven’t been given enough support to continue to BF.

      i do think that women and society in general need to be fully informed of BF vs formula feeding, then and only then can a woman make an informed choice of one aspect of parenting, feeding there baby. yes BF offers more than a feed but giving a bottle fed baby cuddles every time they are fed etc can have similar benefits.

      just want to say that no matter how you feed your baby there will be someone who has something to say, that is negative towards it. BF mums get ‘crap’ for BFing in public, and FFing mums get ‘crap’ for bottle feeding, lets just leave it be, but be there to provide support and help to those that want or need it

    • Your name:Nurse/Naturopath says:

      02:54pm | 08/05/10

      It IS an instinctive process; it’s just that some mothers do not have that instinct or have lost touch with their bodies. As a former maternity nurse and now a naturopath working with fertility, I am constantly reminded of this. So many women don’t even know their own bodies! Pregnant women still declare breastfeeding is dirty. In the 60s my mum expressed for many premmy babies - she had no car and had 3 small kids of her own, was also working part time AND still did it. Our lives are very different from those days and yes, it is up to each of us to plan around our babies rather than as I hear all too often “It wont change my life. My kids are going to have to fit around me.” I don’t judge anyone on their ‘choices’ but facts are facts. All the ENT kids I get into my clinic, all the kids in my own childrens’ classes with grommets and asthma, all the kids who seem to continually bring lurgies to expose the rest of the kids (no, it’s not their faults) were all bottle fed babies. Anyone thinking it is easier to bottle feed than breast feed is misguided. Breastfeeding is simple, and for anyone complaining about this being done in public (usually some judgmental older woman “We didn’t do that in our day.” “Maybe not, but you also put up with abusive husbands in your day.”
      And despite all the ‘experts’ rabbiting on about what is evidence based, if you are having trouble breastfeeding, have been instructed by your health nurse on how to help your baby to latch on, go and see a naturopath. 100% success rate in over 20 years of practice (for nursing mothers with difficulties) would surely allow even blind Freddy to see that balancing the body and encouraging milk flow with safe herbs or homeopathics is a must? Although it is difficult to stimulate later on, if a pregnant woman takes the right supplements or tinctures, she will often have no problem with post partum issues. Food for thought…

    • Judy says:

      07:14pm | 07/05/10

      24 hours after giving birth? Gee, you were lucky. It was FOUR hours where I had my babies (even for a first baby). Mind you, this is the same hospital that was so under-resourced that I was told to deliver my second baby at home because they were full up in the delivery room (plus the first aid room, plus the waiting room, plus the hallway…) and had no midwives or equipment left!

      Cheers,

    • ej says:

      01:21pm | 07/05/10

      It’s Friday, so that means our issue de jour is breastfeeding. Tomorrow it will be to smack or not to smack. The next day it will be stay-at-home mum’s vs working mum. The day after it will be time for the paid maternity leave debate. Yawn.

      Honestly, why do we keep debating this guff? People who agree will agree and those that don’t, wont. And never the twain shall meet.

      Obviously this is a cheap ploy to get loads of responses as we all tear each other to shreads in trying to get our point across. I’m so, so, so sick of these “controversial” issues that are on high-rotation on these blogs. I mean c’mon surely we’ve talked this subject to death by now. Those who want to breastfeed and can will and those who don’t want to breastfeed or can’t, wont. Argue all you want, but people will do as they please. Get over it.

    • mum of 2 says:

      07:42pm | 09/05/10

      So true. I am so over these pointless blogs…....please come up with somthing a little more interesting to talk about….we all do our best for our children…end of story…

    • Bec says:

      03:30pm | 07/05/10

      Love your work ej, so, so true

    • paul says:

      01:10pm | 07/05/10

      the great thing about being an uncomprimising social commentator is that you don’t have to compromise your opinion, or your liberal use of generalisms, or your tendency to splenetic ejaculations, or indeed your glossing over a large and complex area of human behaviour in favour of classist agitprop.  bravo!

    • rugrat says:

      09:15pm | 08/05/10

      I am always intensely curious as to whether these ‘social commentators’ actually believe the crap they spout, or if they just say whatever is going to cause the most reaction, without real thought as to whether what they are saying is true or not.

    • Glen says:

      01:17pm | 07/05/10

      You’ve come across Rita’s work before I see

    • Kylie says:

      01:07pm | 07/05/10

      I breastfed both of my children for a over a year. I am very happy that they may have gained some benefit from breastfeeding, however I don’t think for one minute that my ability to breastfeed makes me more selfless than any other mother. It worked for me. I found it convenient and cost effective.

      Several of my friends have started breastfeeding their infants, only to experience extreme difficulties like mastitis and badly cracked nipples. They reluctantly switched to formula feeding and were made to feel guilty, despite the fact that their babies thrived. They still did the night feeds, still had very little freedom, were still exhausted and they had to put up with judgemental comments from others.

      Every woman and every baby is different. There are physical and emotional reasons, as well as “medical” reasons for mothers to choose bottle feeding.
      Statements like yours don’t encourage more women to choose breastfeeding. Please consider the impact that such harsh words can have on the fragile esteem of women who may already be struggling in the role of new mother.

    • Teena says:

      11:26am | 08/05/10

      Kylie, from all the mums out there who tried and struggled and reluctantly had to switch to formula - THANK YOU!

    • Vanessa says:

      10:45am | 08/05/10

      No one can make you feel guilty.  The times I have guilty is because I knew I wasn’t doing my best and putting my wants before others.  Mastitis and cracked nipples suck, but we can get over it.  The problem is that society has made formula an equal choice to breastfeeding, and it’s simply not.  It’s an inferior product and if more women fully understood that they would push through pain and discomfort.  A recent study in the US concluded over 900 infant lives could be saved in the US each year by breastfeeding.  Motherhood is hard sometimes, but we don’t give up, the same should apply with breastfeeding.

    • Steph says:

      10:19am | 08/05/10

      Well said Kylie - I definitely agree. And a few other respondents have stated that they had problems with latching, sore nipples etc. But the point is that they tried, whilst many other mothers dont even bother!

    • jasmine says:

      05:53am | 08/05/10

      Very true and well said Kylie.
      What works for you and your child.
      I breastfed, and would do it again.
      I did not have more than half an hour away from my child for her first 6months of life. 
      In the grand scheme of things this is short term for long term benefit.  I also found myself happy and relaxed while doing it - you do learn quickly how your breasts work and how clever you really are from making a baby to feeding and keeping it alive : )

    • steph says:

      09:59pm | 07/05/10

      Absolutely the voice of reason…  Just because one thing is deemed better than the other, does not mean the other choice is a bad choice.  We live in an age where formula is highly researched and high quality, and yes, we all know it is not as good as breast milk, but before judging, remember that every situation is different.  Most level headed mums know this - by far the majority do what is best for them, their baby, their family as a whole, many factors go into making the decision as to whether or not to breastfeed, and for how long.

    • Sheree P says:

      04:07pm | 07/05/10

      Beautifully put - your comments are my thoughts exactly.  I was lucky, yes lucky, enough to breastfeed my 3 children and stopped when they were each 7-8 months old due to them eating solids and me going back to work (I did not have time to express, which is not pleasant, at work due to the amount of customers entering the waste station I was at).  And no, it was not financially viable for me to stay at home when I earnt the better wage, so my husband cared for our children whilst I was at work.  A number of my friends & family have struggled to breastfeed & have been put down and made feel worthless by doctors, nurses, midwives and other mothers.  Sorry but breast may be excellent for children but as far as I’m concerned, so long your baby/child is healthy, growing and putting on weight, then bottle or breast, is really doesn’t matter.  All mothers should be supported regardless of whether they bottle or breast feed. 

      Oh & just wanted to say a big thank you to all the dads out there who do a lot of work helping out with bottle feeding, caring for babies, changing nappies & supporting their wives/girlfriends in general - there are many men out there that do not get given their deserved praise, so Thank You.

    • asdfsdf says:

      03:20pm | 07/05/10

      That is the best piece of writing on this topic I have read so far. Well said Kylie..

    • Michellemac says:

      02:42pm | 07/05/10

      Kylie, wise words. I am in exactly the same boat as you. I was lucky enough to find it easy and convinient and did it for just over 12 months with both my kids and I did sometimes use formula towards the end.

      But I have a number of friends who struggled with pain, latching issues, babies not gaining weight etc etc etc and then made to feel really bloody guilty when they turn to bottle feeding their kids, worried about the ‘damage’ they might be doing or how they have somehow failed being a woman and/or mother because they couldn’t do it right.  And now, 6 years down the track when our kids are running around together it’s certainly not apparent which ones were breastfed or how long they were breastfed for!

    • Elphaba says:

      01:57pm | 07/05/10

      Well said Kylie.  Yelling and frothing at the mouth is not going to help the situation.  It’s all very well and good to advise people about which is the best road medically and scientifically, but as we’ve all seen with the anit-vax debate, it’s not going to trump gut feeling.

      Mothers should do what they think is best for them and their child.  Choice. It’s a lovely thing, isn’t it?

    • MD says:

      01:05pm | 07/05/10

      It’s not all laziness, my Nephew was born with a cleft pallat and couldn’t attach to the nipple, he is in year 2 doing year 4 maths and English work and he eats like a pig but you can see everyone of his ribs he is that wiry so I fail to see how it applies that all babies bottle fed have a low IQ and prone to obese??

    • OddCreature says:

      07:35pm | 30/05/10

      I was an “outlier”. I couldn’t breastfeed, due to a medical condition. I didn’t choose to feed my baby formula, I had to or she would have starved to death. But it’s irrelevant. I don’t view myself as any different to a woman who “chooses” to bottlefeed, because it’s not always “selfish”.

      Yes when you become a mother the child should be your first priority. But there are times when your own interest NEED to come before your childs, that’s the harsh reality of life. I know plenty of mums with valid reasons why they had to give up breastfeeding - their medications effected their milk, their supply was low, breastfeeding was contributing towards PND, and yes, needing to return to work (sorry to burst a few bubbles, but when a pregnancy is a surprise it leaves you little time to “plan ahead”, and very few people I know would consider aborting so that they could have more time to plan).

      So yes, the mums put their needs first, and yes that’s a bit “selfish”. But a mum with PND could potentially commit suicide. By putting her own needs first for a moment, she could well be ensuring she is around while the child grows up, so in fact it’s the best thing for them both…..

      I’ll let you all ponder that for a while….

    • Grumbles says:

      04:59pm | 07/05/10

      The article refers to adult obesity, at 7 your nephew does not apply. Further the article clearly states bottle feeding expressed milk is just as good, which probably happened in this situation given that the mum would be in pain if she didn’t express everyday.

    • MD says:

      04:29pm | 07/05/10

      sorry, article was too long couldn’t get through it all with changing screens, that’ll teach me not to read through the entire thing lol

      I fully intent to breast feed, my sister couldn’t with either her kids (I didn’t mention the other one not coz she’s dumb but she’s not old enough to test yet) so barring any cleft palate or no milk I will be doing it natural, not to mention it will save money not having to buy formula, I am also going to attempt cloth nappies

    • Billy Y says:

      02:31pm | 07/05/10

      It is called statistics and he is an outlier.

    • Heidi says:

      02:19pm | 07/05/10

      Did you not read the article? It acknowledges that some mothers and babies can’t breastfeed for medical reasons - your nephew obviously falls into this category. And of course no one is suggesting that all bottlefed babies will be dumb and obese, just like not everyone who smokes will die of lung cancer. But if we know that breastfeeding reduces the risks of being obese, and there is no medical reason why breastfeeding is not possible, then why would you not do it, to make sure your baby has the best possible start in life? Yes it can be inconvenient, yes it can be painful, yes it can be very difficult to get it right (I have breastfeed 2 children, 1 for 12 months and still going with my 8 month old). But CHOOSING not to breastfeed is not just lazy, as far as I’m concerned it’s selfish.

    • Louisa says:

      01:00pm | 07/05/10

      Best if those women who want to have children to plan ahead and stay at HOME with their children.

    • jessica says:

      09:10am | 08/05/10

      reply to amanda- I am in the same situation as you, my husband had to bottle feed my daughter expressed milk the week before I returned to work to ensure she would be alright. There was a lot of struggling and screaming and he came and implored me to feed her but I made him persist. more screaming, then dead silence for two minutes and he emerged with an empty bottle and a big grinning baby. they just have to be really hungry that first time. Now I express at work for her in my office. I just shut the door and off I go. Best of luck !

    • Amanda says:

      04:55pm | 07/05/10

      That would be ideal, however, I earn more then my partner, so I am going back to work and leaving my daughter with her father.  Which means that as I want to keep breastfeeding I need to express.  I do feel that it is a huge burden, for the past 5 months I have not been able to be away from my daughter for more than 3 hours, because she won’t take expressed milk from a bottle, and we are desperately trying to get her to take it now so I can go back to work.  I don’t think we should discount the burden placed on exclusively breastfeeding mothers but at the same time, it is so worth it.

    • max says:

      04:01pm | 07/05/10

      My wife stayed home for almost 2 years to take care of our son. However, she only managed to breastfeed for 10 weeks max because there was no milk. We consulted lactation specialists and no results. Instead my wife started to feel depressed. Finally the last lactation specialist we saw said it’s ok no to be able to breastfeed. So long we give full love and attention to our son it’s all be allright. So to us it’s not a choice.

    • Sam says:

      03:28pm | 07/05/10

      Wake up - Its got nothing to do with having a sugar daddy and everything to with planning ahead, which is what Louisa stated. If you cant plan ahead or afford to stay at home with your children, then maybe you shouldnt have any.

    • Wake up says:

      02:45pm | 07/05/10

      Reply to Louisa, well dear some of us just can’t afford to stay home. Some of us have to go back to work so we can afford to look after their children. Obviously you are either childless or have a great sugar daddy!

    • H of SA says:

      12:56pm | 07/05/10

      Slightly off topic but as someone who has always been pissed off at places that ask women not to breast feed there (asking someone to stop using their breasts to feed an infant is like requesting them to stop using their lungs for breathing) - did you know that its actually illegal to prevent someone from breast feeding in public? At least here in SA. Huzzah!

    • Daniel says:

      12:51pm | 07/05/10

      I think people should just get over this issue. Im male and I have nothing against it at all. Id like to see more.

    • Belle says:

      07:54pm | 09/05/10

      I’m with both of you Jode & Ajent, I think women discriminate against other breastfeeding mothers more so than men.  In fact, while breastfeeding my 1st child at a restaurant (and he was covered with a muslin wrap over my shoulder), I was glared at by 2 elderly women.  At the end of their meal, they got up and had the audacity to come over to my table and tell me “it’s not natural to breastfeed in public. You shouldn’t leave the house to do that”.  I was absolutely dumbfounded, yet so furious, that I didn’t know what to say.  In hindsight, I think I knew what I wanted to say!!

      I had a premmie 1st child, with whom I had many troubles getting him to stay awake for a feed let alone get proper attachment.  But I persisted - I was so determined to breastfeed for as long as I could.  Over the next 6 months, I battled mastitis 4x, nipple vasospasms, nipple infections, yet I still persisted and had adequate supply to feed my child AND still express for when I would wean him and for the days he was at childcare.  He ended up being breastfed for 10 months before I fell pregnant with my 2nd child.  My 2nd child is now 14 weeks old and very happily breastfed (despite me already battling mastitis once…so far…).  I can only encourage breastfeeding to other mothers, BUT I am not going be critical of mothers who bottle feed.  At the end of the day, every mother will do what’s best for their child AND themselves, and if it means they need a bit of sanity by sharing the feeding duties with their partner, I would completely understand.

    • Jode says:

      09:16am | 08/05/10

      I breastfeed my daughter for 20 months and stopped only as I was pregnant with our second. Funny that the only filthy looks and comments I got while discreetly feeding were from other women, never a man.

    • Ajent says:

      03:43pm | 07/05/10

      Personally, I find that it is much more common for other women to be put off by public displays of breastfeeding than men. And in particular young professional women who aren’t even considering having children of their own yet.

      lets face it - you dont see much boob when feeding baby anyway, and mothers very quickly learn how to feed without flashing the entire world. Its a natural, healthy and very important act which society should support. If breasts offend you then just dont look!!

    • Luke says:

      02:20pm | 07/05/10

      I dont know what “men” decided it was disguisting! I mean… what’s disguisting about it? Its just a part of life…
      Birth
      Breastfed
      School
      Work
      Marriage
      Have Kids
      Grow old
      Die

    • Macca says:

      01:13pm | 07/05/10

      I’m with you Daniel, if a women wishes to feed her child in public than so be it. I’m allowed to eat in public, why can’t the baby?

    • Ellie says:

      12:40pm | 07/05/10

      “Feminists are quick to point the finger of blame at an unsympathetic male dominated society but the unpalatable truth is that it’s not chauvinistic male attitudes or outdated workplace practises that prevent women breastfeeding, it is simply mothers putting their own interests before that of their child”

      I strongly agree with this statement. Many men will go on about breastfeeding in public being disgusting etc, but if women stood together and didn’t give into their demands, and stood up for our right to breastfeed, then there would be no issues - men would just have to deal with it! Feminists are being lazy, and they continue to sprout nonsense that formula is just as good when it isn’t - nothing can compare with natural breast milk.

      I’m not keen on being a stay at home mother myself, so when I have a baby, I will be expressing as much milk as I can whilst I am at work - it is our right! If every mother didn’t give in to the demands of others and expressed and breastfed wherever and whenever her baby needs, then I don’t believe any of this would be a problem. Women/feminists - stop blaming men when you should be blaming yourselves!

    • Linda says:

      07:58am | 19/04/11

      Lanii Douglas you are an idiot. breastfeeding causes intelligent liberal voters???? wtf is that supposed to mean??? where the hell do you get your retarded ideas from? im breastfeeding my dauhgter and if she turns into a selfish liberal voter because I breastfed her then ill slap it out of her. soooo typical of someone who calls breatsfeeding supporters ‘breastfeeding nazis’ to have such a rediculous view on life. now bugger off back to your right wing lifestyle and support your stupid political ideals that have led to Australia’s demise so many times. tory voting mole.

    • Court says:

      08:36pm | 16/05/10

      No kids? Never Breastfed? No comment….

    • Heather says:

      09:13am | 10/05/10

      I am a"lower socio-economic mother” who breastfed my 6 children (now aged 8 to 20) for 11-18 months. I actually found that it was overwhelmingly women who looked down on breastfeeding in public—and it wasn’t because men were “ogling”. The overwhelming majority of men who bothered to notice and “look” had the “awwww innit that cute” look not the leery look.

      We underestimate men. Really.

      90% of “loud passerby remarks” about how disgusting or inappropriate I was (and I wasn’t immodest) came from women (strangers, usually).

      I’ll be lambasted for this comment, but: have also been a breastfeeding counsellor and home birth advocate (and I’m not even a hippy wink ) and while mothers do have honest difficulties with breastfeeding, in my experience the overwhelming underlying reason for finally giving it up is,like it or not, the “I don’t really wanna continue” attitude, although it is cloaked in other reasons.

      Motherof2 and Ellie: the best reason for mothers to be the SAH is breastfeeding, and only breastfeeding. If you’re bfing full time and working,you will be exhausted. Absolutely exhausted. SAH mums can “fit” in better with baby rhythms in the first 6-11months. However after that, a SAH dad can be as “good” as a SAH mum.

    • Jodie says:

      07:41am | 10/05/10

      Lanii Douglas, that was very well said!  I have three kids and breastfed them all but the youngest one was breastfed for the longest time because I was more confident and relaxed as a mother ... my middle child was only breastfed for 4 months and that was because she had a health problem that went undiagnosed for that long, so she was looking for food all the time (for comfort) - at the end of 4 months I was utterly exhausted and suffering PND so I had to turn to bottles for her.  It broke my heart (and shouldn’t have, really, but the pressure to breastfeed IS intense), and it was the best decision for us in the end.  I got my energy back and my husband was able to take a lot of the workload for me.  I also got to know my 2 year old again, who had been mostly palmed off on to grandparents because we were so busy dealing with this “difficult” baby!  My daughter now has the most wonderful relationship with her dad, and I’m sure that goes back to him becoming her main carer when I needed him to. 

      I do think the pressure to breastfeed is too much to bear for some mums - the idea that “successful” women (what is that anyway…a woman in paid employment?  How is that any more successful than any other mum???) have more success with breastfeeding probably has more to do with them having more self-confidence to start with.  It’s all about attitude and doing what’s right for you.

    • pablo says:

      10:25pm | 09/05/10

      My wife tried really hard to breast feed our twins - she simply produced no milk despite massage, medication, expressing religiously every 3 hours etc.  She felt guilty and was crushed (mainly because of the condescending attitude of “lactation consultants”), but I was the one who told her not to worry.  We shared bottle feeding and now our boys are 3, healthy and happy.  Idiotic statements by individuals about “selfish” mothers are a dead giveaway that the person making the statement has no experience of what they are pontificating about.

    • Rhonda says:

      04:59pm | 09/05/10

      Lanii Douglas, I think I love you.  The way you expressed yourself and described the feelings of breast feeding your first child are so good.  I also tried desperately to breast feed my first child.  I tried for 6 weeks.  Mastitis, not enough milk, baby not suckling properly and also the fact that I was suffering from Pernicious Anemia (and didn’t know it) which has an effect of making you incredibly tired.  I was made to feel like a failure when my milk dried up completely.  Putting her on a bottle was in my top ten best things I ever did.  My second child was put onto a bottle straight away.  He is now 14, fit and healthy and not a sociopath.

    • More Grief says:

      08:26pm | 08/05/10

      To Good Grief…what a load of ’ Holier than thou ’ tripe. Sounds like you would be scathing of anyone who may be in a position to be make you present as better than they.
      The fact that your experience wasn’t so terrible that you could continue to BF obviously means that those that stop are to be scorned as they mustn’t be as good as you, as noone could have an experience worse than yours. Could it also be that you have been either well provided for or perhaps just content with mediocrity to have such a financial attitude.
      Having and raising children effects and is effected by all facets of your life/lifestyle. To say that all else is to be abandoned so you can BF is ludicrous. ” Oh, we can’t afford education, a decent house in a safe area or even safe transport for our child since I threw it all away so I didn’t have to express or formular feed….but MY baby got breast milk”

    • Lanii Douglas says:

      03:55pm | 08/05/10

      “So one would think that unless you want your children to grow up fat and stupid you would heed the advice of medical professionals and abide by the WHO guidelines. So why do so many quit breastfeeding in the first six months?”

      It is comments like this in articles like this that make me sick!
      Yes I breast-fed four children for well over two ... See Moreyears each but it was very difficult for me, especially my with my eldest. In hindsight the best thing I could have done for both of us would have been to feed him formula from a bottle. I was young, he was what was termed then as a “high need infant”, he cried. Alot. All day. (or so it seemed).
      I persevered with breast feeding because that is what good mothers do isn’t it. I had read all the propagander (oops, literature) about breast feeding and naturally did not want my baby to be fat, stupid, wind up in prison, or worse, vote labor! I wanted my child to be an athletic, clever, law-abiding liberal voting well rounded citizen. Something that would surely only happen if I breastfed him. I was of the firm belief that if I didn’t breast feed him I would be the worst mother in the world, welfare would come and take him from me, elderly women would shake their finger at me and people would think I was bottle feeding my baby because I couldn’t be bothered with the breast feeding.
      Instead of enjoying my baby while he was tiny I worried, fussed was stressed, I couldn’t leave him for five minutes while I caught my breath, and all in all as much as I love him and he has grown up to be a fine law abiding, clever person who makes a great contribution to society, I wonder looking back if it was all worth it.
      I really wish the staunch advocates of breast feeding (and I was one, in my time) would really pull their heads in and look more at the big picture. Families who for WHATEVER reason decide to feed their baby fomula are making a decision that is right for THEM and do not need articles from the “nipple nazis” making them feel guilty for making such a choice.
      At the end of the day, the important thing is that the baby is loved, warm, clean, stimulated, cuddled and fed-fed by whatever means suits the family.
      I don’t think any baby who grows up to be an axe-murderer becomes that way just because he was bottle fed. Other factors come into it too.

      Stepping off my soap-box now.

    • good grief says:

      10:24am | 08/05/10

      Motherof2 - the argument of “you wouldn’t know, you’re not a parent” “I’ll listen a little more intently when you’ve actually had a baby” is the last bastion of those that really don’t have a legitimate argument.  I was scathing of mothers who prioritise their greed and ambition ahead of their childs welfare before I was a parent, and I am just as scathing now.  Yes breastfeeding does not come easy, I know from first hand experience, but this article also points to the fact that those who HAVE breastfed, don’t continue because of the inconvenience.  People don’t like hearing that they have prioritised their lifestyle and the money needed to facilitate it, over the long term health of their child.  I was climbing the corporate ladder, making a very healthy wage.  But I chose to have a child, and that child should not suffer because I can’t deal with a cut in disposable income.  And if someone tries to trot out the old chestnut of needing two incomes, then you’ve over extended yourself to begin with.  Sell up, move somewhere cheaper and be a parent.  Your child didn’t have a choice to be brought into this world, so suck it up and do what you are supposed to do to raise a healthy, secure and happy child.

    • MotherOf2 says:

      06:34pm | 07/05/10

      Sorry Ellie, but I’ll listen to you a little more intently when you’ve actually had a baby. Be keen to see if you then ‘blame yourself’ if everything goes pear-shaped in the breastfeeding stakes! You, frankly, have no idea the pressure that most mothers feel to breastfeed and when it doesn’t come easily, and it invariably doesn’t, there’s a myriad reasons why a caring, comitted mother has really no choice but to stop trying. “putting their own interests befoer that of their child” is a ridiculous, sweeping statement from someone who is in no way qualified to comment…take your sanctimony elsewhere.

    • Ellie says:

      04:48pm | 07/05/10

      Ooops, I dared to have an opinion like you Angela. Uhem please point out where I said that mothers should not be allowed to have a choice? Perhaps you are confusing me with the author of the article. I believe that women should have choices, but I’m not going to shy away from saying that breast milk is the best for your child and formula doesn’t come close.

      You’re wrong, there is no contradiction. There are no studies to show that stay at home dad’s are any worse than stay at home mums, where as there are mountains of evidence that breast milk is better than formula. Find me a report that concludes that stay at home Dad’s are bad for kids, please.

      Oh I’m not on a high horse either, I’m basing my opinion on conclusive facts.

    • Angela, non breastfeeding mum says:

      01:35pm | 07/05/10

      What a huge contradiction!!!!!! You are quick to deem that mothers who dont breasfeed are “simply putting their own interests before that of their child” yet you go onto say Ïm not keen on being a stay at home mother myself…”  Thats not thinking about YOUR own interests first??  I dare say you ignore the reports and stastics that say that children are better off staying at home being raised with their mother!  How dare you.  How dare you think that its not our choice to breastfeed, like it is a choice not to be a stay at home mum.  Mothers are criticised WAY too much for choices, and it starts from the minute you are pregnant.  I hope you have a fall of your high horse.

 

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