Brad Pitt doesn’t smell like Chanel No.5

Chanel is classic personified. That’s why it’s never mattered that the average person could never justify paying cost price for a Chanel suit - buying a tiny lipstick or nail polish makes you feel just as good. It says you’re stylish, elegant and living a better kind of life - the type of life other people want to aspire to.

Nobody wants Brad Pitt’s life right now. For a start, he’s too hairy. What exactly is that dishevelled look he’s got going on? Somewhere under all that beard is a very handsome man, but right now he’s far too, “crazy chic” to be a convincing classic face of Chanel.

Then there’s the issue of his children. All six of them. Sure they’re cute, but how glamorous and mysterious do you think a person who has six children tends to be? Not very.

Now that’s fine in everyday life, but in the world of consumers, where Chanel reigns supreme, mystery and glamour is mandatory. We need to believe that the face behind the brand has a life worthy the imagined reality it purports. If only to justify the amount of money we’re willing to part with to get even a tiny piece of the famous product. 

Nicole Kidman was a great choice in this regard, because she’s always been very elusive. When she was the face of the perfume back in 2004 she’d married Tom Cruise, the most mysterious man in Hollywood. She also had an Australian accent and red hair. Similarly it was hard to know what she was thinking and what her actual life was really like. Perfect.

Contrast this with the conversation you might have with Brad Pitt these days. It would go something like this:

Person A: What are you doing tonight, Brad?
Brad Pitt: Oh well, first there is bath time, then homework, and then we might read the kids a story. We’ll do that six times over and then pass out on the couch…

Hardly the stuff of Chanel inspired dreams of romantic tete a tetes at a sophisticated bar, somewhere in Europe with a beautiful woman. That’s what George Clooney is for.

Clooney ticks all the boxes of the perfect face of Chanel. Classically handsome, a little silver fox, looks great in black and white. He even has a terrifically chaotic, yet never publicly messy, personal life. He’s also older, and older, by definition is classic.

It’s hard to believe that he wasn’t Chanel’s first choice.

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