Pippa Middleton, the sister of Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, AKA the girl in “that dress,” has written a party book.

Everything you might have never wanted to know about hosting a soiree

According to Penguin, who paid six figures for the hardcover tome, it’s “a comprehensive seasonal guide to simple and creative entertaining”.

Phew, something for everyone then.

This is not exactly new territory for Pippa; her parents made a fortune from the business of knees-ups, called “Party Pieces”. One of those enviably simple and clever business ideas you just wish you’d thought of.

But by far the best thing about Ms Middleton’s upcoming book is that the all-knowing author has committed the gravest crimes in the history of party hosting: upstaging her sister at her own wedding.

And that, in my opinion, shoots Pippa’s book straight to the top of this year’s must-read list. Imagine what other surprises she has in store?

Truth be told, the only problem with book is its title, because it should be called “The How To Not Have A Party Book.”

Here’s how it would work.

The first chapter could be a blow by blow guide to her own personal victory: stealing the limelight in five easy steps. While the remaining chapters could be drawn from the experiences and skill sets of her bevy of new royal connections.

For example…

What to wear: Brother in law by marriage, Prince Harry could have a substantial cameo here, starting with how to look great in the buff and possibly who not to invite. As well as etiquette around the appropriate use of cameras and mobile phones at private events. Hello Las Vegas!

What to say: Most material for this section could be provided care of the Windsor family’s ample idiosyncrasies. Will’s grandpa Prince Phillip could take care of introducing foreign guests. And Prince Charles could shed some light on the finer points of talking to plants.

What to eat and drink: Maybe drag Fergie in for that one, her Weight Watchers connections would ensure guests won’t leave too burdened down with calories, and HRH could throw in her two cents on the best G’n’T mix.

Party on.

Follow me on Twitter: @lucyjk

Comments close on this post at 8pm Sunday AEST

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5 comments

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    • Bill says:

      06:26am | 01/09/12

      Woo! Pippa in THAT dress! Talk about memory burn…

    • thatmosis says:

      08:25am | 01/09/12

      Of course she wouldn’t be trading on her sisters position or her “celebrity” status for showing the world that she has a cute arse would she. I suppose all the wannabes will rush out and buy it proving once again the old adage that you can fool most of the people most of the time.

    • Roger says:

      11:25am | 01/09/12

      Partying with Pippa? yes please!

    • grumpy old fart says:

      12:29pm | 01/09/12

      Haven’t read the book, but…“upstaging her sister at her own wedding”; Is that Pippa’s, or her sister’s; I mean wedding. Did Pippa get married, and upstage her sister or what. Haven’t followed any story lines on Home and Away for years, since I got divorced and wasn’t ‘forced’ to watch it.

    • Fred Bloggs says:

      09:53am | 02/09/12

      “Committed the gravest crimes in the history of party hosting: upstaging her sister at her own wedding” What bullshit is this? The media made sure that Pippa’s bum was the centre of attention, not Pippa herself, so how can this be considered a crime? A poor editorial comment indeed.

 

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