The former Soviet country of Turkmenistan isn’t known for its trendsetting qualities. It’s dry. It’s cold and ugly. It exports lots of cotton. Not what you’d call a world power.
But in 2005 it became the first country in the world to take a strong stand, not against fascism, but lip-synching.
Declared a great crime against the culture of the proud nation, the late President Saparmurat Niyazov banned miming in all forms _ concerts, TV, even private weddings.
China followed suit last year after a pretty girl replaced the face, but not the voice, of a less-cute pigtailed version singing the theme tune at last year’s Olympic Games opening ceremony. Yes, we were all shocked.
But the outrage has finally landed with the NSW Government revealing it’s considering laws to force artists to disclose on posters or tickets if they plan to mime.
Tabloid poplet Britney Spears seems to be the catalyst for what could be a pre-cursor to a wider crackdown.
Specifically, her 14 Australian shows in which she’s charged up to $1500 a ticket to let people watch her move her lips in the way they would look if noise was actually coming out of her mouth.
Value for money? The thrill of shaming tall poppies? Who knows what NSW’s rationale is, but it’s a frickin’ hilarious idea. And a fairly stupid one. I hope that few feel strongly about real life human ventriloquism. Those with a passion for watching artists perform moving live renditions of songs they write aren’t the candy-pop-bile type.
Those who obsess over celebrity, repetitive synth music and bright flashy lights won’t give a crap whether their half-naked, gyrating idol is singing. As long as they can sing along.
Anyone else who arcs up about the shame of lip-synching is probably a black frame spectacles-wearing, faux artsy, music snob.
Besides, there’s a case to let drones such as Spears mime.
Wikipedia (the shining beacon of truth) says miming ``can be used to make it appear as though actors have musical ability’‘.
``E.g. the Partridge Family. Or to misattribute vocals e.g. Milli Vanilli.
``It is more often used by recording artists to create a particular effect, to enable them to perform live dance numbers or to cover for illness or other deficiencies during live performances.’‘
The last two seem particularly apt for Britske.
She ain’t alone either. Rapper 50 Cent did it at the B.E.T music awards. R Kelly’s done it. Ashlee Simpson. Pavarotti when it got too cold for him to breathe and ... um ... the Sydney Symphony Orchestra at the 2000 Olympics.
Tour director Steve Dixon has defended Britney’s miming, saying ``you come for the experience’‘, and he might be right.
There’s so much more to look forward to from a Britney concert than just the ``music’‘. She might overdose/attack a photographer/collapse/vomit/shave her head/get put in a straight jacket/not wear undies/drink drive/abuse her father/give birth/forget her dance moves or simply look fat.
Facebook Recommendations
Read all about it
Punch live
Up to the minute Twitter chatter
RT @gregprichard: The Victorian Sports Minister has just sent the New Zealand Prime Minister a commiserative email. #stateoforigin
@VanillathunderV fair comeback. But seriously, if that was a try then I'll book my skiing in Queensland this year
@BrettS69 the loveliest thing about post-origin is the sledges from gloating qlders #ratherbeagoodloserthanapoorwinner
That is the video referee howler to end all howlers to end all howlers to end all howlers to end all howlers #stateoforigin
Recent posts
The latest and greatest
Animal experiments won’t cure me from cancer
Lying on a cold table in an unfamiliar place and undergoing a core biopsy was probably one of the most…
If you want to get promoted, laugh at the boss’s jokes
Red alert, ladies. Making jokes about your ability at work is not funny particularly at board level.…
Need someone to do your dirty work? Try God.
Punishing the baddies is only fun in the movies. In real life it’s messy, expensive, and fraught…
Gentle jabs to the ribs
They must pay for one’s bitter disappointments
A private school girl’s family is sueing her elite, extremely expensive private school for not… Read more
Most commented