A tear at work would cop you a tsunami of taunting

colroe says:

05:07pm | 09/07/12

I believe it is now trendy to shed a few tears.  What with pollies and their faked emotional tears, (that dreadful Hanson girl, and of all people big tough Joe Hockey!!!!)  Made me cringe.  I can understand true emotion, and have shed a few tears myself when loved ones have died, but the trend now to dissolve into a blubbering nitwit at the drop of a hat is common.  Stop Press!!! Tim Henman!!!

Stone age liberal says:

04:31pm | 09/07/12

depends a lot on your job I think, My mother worked pallitive care nursing for many years and when young patients would pass away she would quite often burst into tears. This is perfectly acceptable IMHO. and if you are the sort of person who would not shed a tear at the passing of a young life because it is at work I think you need to look at your priorities.

Kate says:

12:50pm | 09/07/12

I have cried at work twice - once when I got fired (sorry, made redundant) and instead of just telling me and letting me go, they kept me in that office for about 20 minutes until I couldn’t hold it in anymore.

The second time was when I can back from maternity leave.  The plan was to return part time and stay part time, but my husband lost his job and I had to go full time.  I cried when I told my boss I would like to go up to full time - thankfully she was brilliant about.

But just having a general blub at your desk - ummm no.  I don’t think so.

Rose says:

11:58pm | 08/07/12

Crying at work can’t really be simplified to good/bad, there are degrees of appropriateness. Some one who turns the waterworks on at the very sniff of pressure or trouble is quite different to the person who is normally composed but who has a bit of a cry when something terrible happens. Not everyone can leave their private lives at the door, and occasionally people have personal problems that are quite consuming and no, it’s not always possible to take time off when you’re going through a bad patch. That again is different from the girl who has a cry every time her partner upsets her or argues with her (which for some people is a lot). There’s also the type of crying, the loud, tearjerker, every one has to notice cry, or the quiet sob. The half hour howler and the brief couple of minutes it takes for some one to compose themselves. As for blokes crying at work, that’s tricky. Logically we know that it shouldn’t be any different but few of us are comfortable when a man cries, we are so conditioned that they shouldn’t. However, I think I’d rather a man have a bit of a (controlled) cry than have him be a bear with a sore head, having temper tantrums or using abusive language. In fact, maybe crying at work for everyone would be preferable to some of the bad tempered, bitchy, snide and abusive tactics some people use when things don’t go their way.

Susan says:

02:44pm | 08/07/12

It might be a bit pre-school in your view but sometimes you are pushed and pushed and pushed and without any conscious thought, you realise you are crying and you actually can’t stop it.  I’ve cried in front of a boss, and I’ve tried not to and wound up half choking.  The article talks about it like it’s a choice and most of the time I think it just happens.  You can recognise you’re on the brink and try and deflect but you can’t always walk away and breathe.  I’ve cried when I’ve been bullied, over time, and the relentlessness of it has just undone me.  I think the tears are a response to feeling powerless and attacked.  And strangely enough, it’s often been quite a minor straw that has worked that ultimate undoing of emotions.  And sure, some will simply say “time of month” but then you tell them you’ve had a hysterectomy.  That tends to stop that flow (in more ways than one).

I also burst into tears in a shop once.  Never done it before and not since…but it was over a silly thing really.  I had moved into a place and the roof was badly leaking. I’d also just had an operation and the thought of needing to move again immediately was agony.  In the process of trying to deal with the major rental issue and the landlord’s poor behaviour, the place was hit by lightning…twice.  Twice it blew out the phone.  Clearly the place wasn’t properly earthed either or something.  Then my relatively new TV went on the blink and I went to the store and asked about a service. I was told I had to bring it in BUT they could only return it to the manufacturer if I had the original packaging box.  Without it, they claimed, they could not help me.  I stood there stunned and said…but…when I bought the TV, nothing was said about needing to keep the original packaging….. and on the discussion went. 

I am no slouch when it comes to dealing with my consumer rights, but on that particular day, with multiple issues mounting up, I just burst into tears because I didn’t have the energy to deal with a ridiculous salesperson and their prohibitive behaviour.

Once I cried he kept saying “This can’t have upset you…other things must be going on in your life”.

I just had to turn my back on him…but he stopped demanding that I required the original packaging.

But it’s not just a female behaviour.  I have had men cry in front of me.  Once when a man was also pushed and pushed beyond what he could deal with at the time, and another when I picked up someone from work as a favour and he got in the car, began to chat, and just burst into tears.  Issues were mounting up for him too.

Jay says:

01:36pm | 08/07/12

I’ve cried once at work and was exceedingly embarassed because it was over something quite trivial, I put it down to pregnancy hormones running riot.  At home I’d burst into tears over the over dishes not being done and all sorts of ridiculous stuff during this strange period. When I blubbered at work, I felt like I’d let all women down, because I’d never been a particularly moody or prone to emotional outbursts and really didn’t have a lot of tolerance for women crying in the workplace over minor issues, because it seemed to be such a ‘typical’ woman thing to do.

I have also witnessed colleagues crying, somewhat understandabley, when they’ve lost a patient they were fond of , but probably the most disdain I’ve held for crying have been those couple perennial bullies at work, who had no problem picking on vulnerable patients or softer colleagues, but as soon as it came back to bite them on the bum, on goes the water works.
It worked as well,because the Manager would instantly lose her resolve and ‘gently’ try and resolve the situation, which didn’t stop the bullying one iota.
Yes,  these types are the real working woman’s worst enemy, one of our own who demand equality in the workplace and then use a feminine ploy such as shedding a tear to manipulate a situation. The same type who ran to the office to make an official complaint about a cleaner’s ‘sexist’ joke, then go on to bully multiple colleagues into resignation. Now that’s having your cake and eating it too!

stephen says:

10:05am | 08/07/12

I was only reading about Sherry Lansing recently, who started out as an Actress, didn’t like it, but ended up as head of a big TV/Movie studio and was good enough at her job that Viacom eventually bought the Company.
I don’t know if she cried a lot, but I’ll bet she thought a lot, and if a sniffle is part of the job, then I reckon the water is worth the outcome ...
not that someone who may have had a grudge will now feel sorry for you because you have feelings, but a worker should always have an ulterior motive and try for the effective performance strategy like putting on your desk a photo of Derryk and the kids - one of whom should have an arm in a sling - and be playing feverishly with your iPhone, (give the screen a soft kiss right when nobody should be looking) and don’t forget to disappear once or twice come back to your chair, and sit back down ever so quietly ... crying in public is, in my opinion, a cry for attention, (and not necessarily assistance) and should be avoided like peanut butter, Geelong, and Private Health Insurance.