Imagine if a dumb trend like planking collided with something much more dangerous than a balcony railing, like say religious fanaticism, and an entire nation caught the bug.

Welcome to contemporary America, where the fad of “Tebowing” is both sweeping and dividing the nation. Tee-what? Tebowing, named after hyper-religious Denver Broncos quarterback, Tim Tebow, is the act of taking a knee in prayer, usually while you’re actually doing something else. Like playing footy.
Tebow has been doing it for months in Broncos games, although he won’t be doing it any more this season, or not onfield anyway, after his team was thumped by the New England Patriots on the weekend. Apparently God prefers a patriot to a believer.
Not that there’s much difference between patriotism and religious belief in America these days. If the Republican primaries have taught us anything, it’s that love of country and love of the Lord go pretty much arm in arm. Indeed, if you don’t love the latter, forget trying to pretend you care for the former.

It’s in this supercharged religious climate that the Tebowing craze has hit and hit hard. To paraphrase the VB ads, the urge to do it can strike in all sorts of situations, both sweat-inducing and non sweat-inducing.
You can get it fightin’

You can get it bitin’

You can get it workin’ a plough (well a snow plough anyway).

Matter of fact I’ve got it now.
Wait a minute. No I don’t. I wouldn’t be caught dead Tebowing, not because I have anything against Christianity, or for that matter Islam, Buddhism, Taoism, Zoroastrianism, Judaism, Jehovas Witnesses or Jedi.
The fact is, there is something vulgar about wearing your religiousness on your sleeve. It’s like rooting in public. It’s not right. Get a room. Or more to the point, get a church.
Particularly in sports, the concept of divine intervention is both egotistical and grotesque. Sydney Morning Herald columnist Peter Fitzsimons is a man many disagree with, but he’s bang on the money in his longstanding campaign against religious grandstanders on the sporting fields of Australia and beyond.
God doesn’t care whether you sink your putt, or biff some bloke to a bloody pulp, or run fast or jump high or throw a beautiful accurate spiralling football pass. He’s not doing so well with the starving kids in Africa or the poor misguided souls who watch Australia’s Funniest Home Videos. The guy (or girl) is clearly stretched.
Ah, but that didn’t stop people latching onto the 316 yards Tebow threw the week before last. Believers took that statistic to be a sign of the famous John 3:16 verse, which apparently reads: For God so loved the world he made this dude get born who would grow up to be awesome at football. Or something.
The believers aren’t having it all their own way, though. Fans at a high school match were beaten up for Tebowing the other day. No one’s condoning that sort of reaction. But it’s evidence that America is divided on the merits of Tebowing, which is quite possibly the only healthy thing about the whole phenomenon.
Anyway, for the record, the Patriots whipped the Broncos 45-10. Tebow completed just nine of his 25 passes. That’s not what you’d call a high conversion rate, although he’s no doubt doing plenty more converting off the field.
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