February 2010

Adelaide is no longer the city of churches or the arts capital of Australia. It’s not even Yass with poofs, as famously dubbed by Doug Mulray shortly before he was mercifully removed from national television by Kerry Packer.

According to the people who run the Sydney Fish Markets, Adelaide is now the mullet capital of Australia, a bogan backwater which is ripe for ridicule by the pony-tailed pseuds who run Sydney’s advertising industry.

The Fish Market’s new marketing slogan - “More Mullets Than Adelaide” - says more about Sydney smugness than Adelaide’s earthiness.

Latest 2 of 17 comments

  • Chris Bass says:

    12:20pm | 12/12/11

    “Upper middle-class white boys imitating the middle-income Sydney Lebanese boys who mimic the middle-class black American entertainers who pretend to have risen from the streets.”...What a joke.  Firstly, the Hoods have never imitated anyone (let alone someone from Sydney? regardless of racial origin which seems to be extremely important to… Read more »

  • S.L says:

    12:10pm | 02/03/10

    Some people just don’t get it. I had to go to a 50th birthday party with a 70s theme (why do parties always have a theme these days?)last year so I went to the hairdressers the day before to style my hair into a mullet. The young trendy girl barely… Read more »


“That’s not insulation, THIS is insulation,” a Canberra insider quipped in mock Paul Hogan at news of Australian involvement in the Dubai assassination plot.

10,9,8…Rudd needed insulation from Garrett's woes. Photo: AAP

Three weeks of intense scrutiny over the bungled $2.45 billion free home insulation scheme, suddenly gave way to a news of an `actual’ political assassination.

And what a story it was, instantly providing Kevin Rudd and his beleaguered Environment Minister, Peter Garrett with some welcome political insulation. As former Liberal leader, John Hewson, noted, the PM grabbed it with unusual relish, so keen was he to start talking about something else.

Latest 2 of 63 comments

  • Robert Smissen says:

    12:31pm | 01/03/10

    Does Kevin Have a Junie Moroni & a Dr Cairns Read more »

  • casba says:

    12:08pm | 01/03/10

    @Persephone. How much is Labor paying you to spruik these inanities that pour profusely form your lips?  They are paying you, right?  You could not,  not be on the payroll and write such gibberish. You are a classic example of a pure unadulterated Ruddite- or should that read Luddite? Read more »


It’s the time of year to make the claim that Jesus is gay. It seems to happen semi-annually.  A few years back, a Queensland academic made the claim that Jesus had sex with his male disciples and a special relationship with ‘the beloved’ disciple, John.

I remember when God was young, me and Susie had so much much fun…

This year it was the turn of another John, Elton John, to raise the topic of Jesus’ sexuality, adding the new element that Jesus was a “super-intelligent” gay man.

The famous singer’s admiration of Jesus extends beyond his claim that Jesus was gay and smart: Elton admires Jesus’ compassion, naming the forgiveness of sins that Christ achieved on the cross as a key element of the Christian message, and something worthy of emulation.

Latest 2 of 50 comments

  • Daddio D says:

    07:50am | 05/03/10

    I haven’t checked in on this debate in a while, pardon me. Heather might like to look at the links I’ve posted for the answers she asks for. I didn’t produce them btw. Read more »

  • omegaman says:

    02:47pm | 02/03/10

    News flash to gays: Not everyone centres their existence around whatever it takes to achieve orgasm. Jesus’ message is clear, we are not animals and can transcend our carnal bodies if we use our brains. How do you extrapolate that this means he got off on gay sex? Gay people… Read more »


Almost 10 years before he became one of the nation’s most accomplished welfare bums - living off the very parliamentary super scheme he railed against as Opposition Leader and now gloats about receiving in his newspaper column - Mark Latham was making a lot of sense about the explosion of welfare dependency in Australia.

Peter Nicholson in The Australian.

Latham was especially energised by the surge in the number of Australians on the disability pension. He tackled the issue at length in his dour but valuable1998 tome Civilising Global Capital. The book was ridiculed as an unreadable doorstop by the Libs, run down by envious Labor non-thinkers as the showy work of an intellectual poseur who was using it only to position himself for the leadership.

But it contained a lot of provocative thinking about the (dictionary definition) incredible rate at which Australians were signing on in their 50s, 40s, even their 30s for a life on handouts as they convinced the welfare state that they quite simply could never work again.

Latest 2 of 93 comments

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Peter Garrett’s demotion by Kevin Rudd this afternoon has all the hallmarks of a sacking - it is humiliating, it is based on poor performance, and it leaves him with virtually no power in his narrowly-defined portfolio.

Gawn, almost: Garrett's demotion stops short of a proper sacking.

But it isn’t a sacking, because Kevin Rudd does not want to give the Opposition the satisfaction of claiming a ministerial scalp, with all the political momentum such a blow would generate.

Sneakily announced late on a Friday to avoid mass media scrutiny throughout a full week, and with the Parliament not sitting next week, Kevin Rudd said his decision to limit Garrett’s responsibilities followed a long conversation with his besieged Environment Minister today.

Latest 2 of 153 comments

  • icons collection says:

    08:23pm | 09/10/12

    Yes, really. So happens. Let’s discuss this question. Read more »

  • Brett says:

    10:02pm | 28/02/10

    In comparison with above, I think 4 deaths, others burnt by electrcity, 100 house fires,  job loses, business bankruptcies, 400,000 potentially deadly homes, disregarded warnings. Somehow your Liberal examples don’t match it.. Read more »


To the casual observer the Israeli embassy in Canberra looks like any other diplomatic mission in the leafy suburbs of Deakin and Yarralumla. Appearances can be deceiving.

The Israeli Embassy in Yarralumla, Canberra. Picture: John Feder

The inside of Israel’s chancery building is more like a mini-fortress than the well-to-do family home visible from the street. Visitors are treated with all the caution you would expect from the world’s most suspicious and fearful regime whose enemies are everywhere, even quiet and peaceful Canberra.

There are no friendly receptionists offering cups of tea and visitors are greeted by lean looking men with crew cuts and bulges under their arms, ear pieces permanently in place. There are no smiles, no small talk, just searches, scans and an array of CCTV cameras.

Latest 2 of 75 comments

  • Dan says:

    09:25pm | 02/03/10

    Pine, the only thing tiresome is that you presuume to know more about logical fallacies than I do. I don’t need to google anything; perhaps you should! (BTW there is a difference, but then you wouldn’t know much about that would you?) Read more »

  • James says:

    03:29pm | 02/03/10

    Well the proof will be in the pudding as to whether this makes Israelies safer or not.  Ultimately I don’t think you can secure peace by killing people. Read more »


WELCOME to another journey around the dilapidated tennis tables and half-finished construction projects in the back sheds of suburbs around our nation.

Graffiti from the improbably-punctuated ?Thoughtcrime

We start this week’s shambolic ramble in the southern parts of Melbourne, where life can move slowly, especially when you’re strapped to a turtle.  Edithvale resident Helen Beaumont is just such a person. 

She has found the zen-like state of happiness that can only come from harnessing up a reptile with a makeshift doggy lead and walking it slowly down a beach.

Latest 2 of 12 comments

  • Buboe says:

    03:46pm | 02/03/10

    Come on Jonty. Blood elf’s can’t be shamans. L2P Noob Read more »

  • Jonty Burton says:

    11:18am | 01/03/10

    We try to have as little point as humanly possible in the Suburban Tales column. Oh, and we like turtles too. Except for one of the subeditors who checks our copy.  That particular journo is indifferent to all reptiles. Read more »


The Punch has just left Facebook’s headquarters in San Francisco where the company sought to address the fallout from the controversy of tribute pages to dead minors being defaced with obscene content.

Following questions earlier this week from The Punch, Facebook’s global communications and policy director, Debbie Frost, told us the company was sending a letter to Queensland Premier Anna Bligh apologising for the incident and addressing the Premier’s letter of concern sent to the social networking giant this week.

Frost said the incident was unprecedented in her time at Facebook, adding it was difficult to fathom how people would decide to attack memorial pages in this way.

Latest 2 of 67 comments

  • Rhyanna says:

    12:49am | 09/02/12

    Iam 10 days into faecbook detoxing its very hard i dont know if i can do it im going crazy as we speak ughhhhhhhhh Read more »

  • Paul Web says:

    12:20pm | 18/08/11

    This is the reason why parents must be instrumental in teaching internet responsibility to their kids. You cannot deny internet in their lives and it is irresponsible to not engage in your children’s internet activities. Paul http://www.connetu.com/ Read more »


As a new recruit to Facebook, I admit I was not exactly on the first-wave of the online social networking phenomena. It’s not that I’m a techo-phobe by any measure (my blackberry is a constant companion).

Just a few of Michael Jackson's nearest and dearest.

It’s just that I am not entirely convinced that the addition of a Facebook page will enhance either my work or personal lives.  And the thing is, in this job, the two are often inextricably linked. MPs are public figures - albeit very minor ones. And - after sharing weekends, evenings and most waking hours with either my local constituents, my parliamentary colleagues,  Industry groups and stakeholders within my shadow portfolio responsibilities -  I’d kinda like to keep a little bit of me just for my nearest and dearest.

Call me old fashioned (and I’m sure many of you will) but I prefer to share my personal trials, triumphs and trivia with those I am closest to, rather than the-acquaintance-of-an-acquaintance who I met once at a function and who has now requested to be my “friend”.

Latest 2 of 61 comments

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Today I’m going to be a curmudgeon.  Let’s start with Avatar.  I hated it.  Before anyone starts:  yes, I know the special effects are amazing.  Yes, I saw it in 3D.  Yes, I know it’s nominated for a Best Film Oscar.  I still hated it.  The plot was lame and I resented being bashed over the head with the groaningly obviously political message.

A chilling combination of Avatar and political street theatre. Photo: AFP

While we’re at it, I also didn’t like Lord of the Rings. Fell asleep in the cinema in fact. Hell, as long as I’m bucking conventional wisdom, I may as well really disgrace myself: I find Monty Python terminally unfunny. I don’t get the big deal about Bob Dylan. And I don’t reckon Brad Pitt’s that attractive.

I usually keep these views to myself because of the reaction they provoke. The Monty Python one in particular attracts gasps of disbelief and horror.

Latest 2 of 144 comments

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  • Gemma says:

    08:30am | 07/08/12

    i dont want to talk to you no more, you emtey headed aaimnl! i fart in your general direction, your mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries!!!!xD Read more »


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